You wrote:
DS needs top and bottom braces as well as some type of expander for a couple months on the bottom. DS has straight teeth on the top but was told he needs braces to fix his bite a little.
If he has straight teeth on the top, why does he "need" braces on the top?
Is his bite affecting his life? I've known 3 people who have bites where there's a whole between top and bottom front teeth, which means that eating pizza is a problem. None of them had braces, and they've all survived just fine. One has a mouth that looks quite a bit like John Turturro, and although perhaps not everyone likes his looks, my old friend who looks like him is quite attractive. The other friend, well, he has a pretty drastic space, but it makes him unique, and he too is cute. And the third is my husband. His sister, who got everything in the family, had braces and my husband went without, and it's only a problem every so often, no big deal.
It's not affecting their lives very much, and all of them have unique and attractive smiles despite not having "perfect" teeth.
As for a palate expander, it makes me vomit. I had that. PAIN like you wouldn't believe. Tears, every time it had to be opened. Sickening torture. I couldn't do that to anyone.
And like your son, I had straight teeth. My bite, maybe, was a bit too straight up and down. But when I've had cranio sacral therapy, which is a really great, but "out there" body therapy, and my facial bones go where they should be, my face is very calm and not tense, and my jaws naturally and easily sit where they used to. It's lovely, to have that straight up and down bite, unlike the "perfect" bite they changed me to (which makes my face look stressed, and I get "why are you mad" questions except for when I've had CST and my face goes back to the old bite).
I was just wondering the other night, if I could find an ortho would mess up my teeth so they look like the female lead in Chuck. She has imperfect, awesome, beautiful teeth, and she would NOT look anywhere near as gorgeous, if she ever gets them fixed or glues veneers onto them.
I would really take some steps back to really wonder if this is worth it at this time. If your son has emotional scars from not having perfect teeth that look like everyone else, he can pay for them on his own.
My brother didn't have the expander, but he was tortured by head gear along with his braces. Sure, he now looks like the character from Burn Notice with straight teeth (and he also just flat out looks like that actor), but why is that so great? My dad has more jumbled teeth (er, had...he had them all yanked for some unknown reason) and it just looks so much more natural. And what's funny is that the receding chin they were so worried about? It's just genetic, all the men on my dad's side have it, none of them had it fixed, and my brother's chin is exactly the same! It seems to be something that fixes itself by the time adulthood hits.
So glad our ortho "fixed" that!
(yeah, I'm really not a fan of orthodontia...can ya tell?)