Does anyone ever tell you that you care too much about Disneyland?

[JazzyCatsAtDLR]

I'm planning a trip for January 20 - 24 with my mom, brother, sister-in-law, nephew and myself. It will be my sister-in-law's and nephew's first time. My sister-in-law wasn't going to come, but then decided she would be missing out and is now coming, but not very happily. She constantly makes remarks about how the money could be spent on something "better" and already has a grudge against Disney for their exorbitant prices (and I think we can all agree the prices are exorbitant...)

I am a lifelong Disney lover and have done nothing but gush to her about how beautiful and well maintained the parks are, and how much better they are than other amusement parks, but now I've read things like Splash Mountain is in total disarray, there are broken light bulbs through the park, and there is garbage floating around.

Are these things true? I was there this past January and Splash was closed for refurb, but I didn't notice any other problems. Do you think Disney is going "downhill?" I very much want Disneyland to be as charming and wonderful as I have always seen it for my sister-in-law and nephew. If it's anything less than perfect, my sister-in-law will most likely disown it for life!

Anyway, I'm just wondering how you all feel about it.

 

[aliceindisneyland]

We've been to DL way over 100x in the last 7 yrs, and only my dad thinks we're kind of crazy; my mom will drop whatever she's doing to join us!

While I believe that DL is indeed the Happiest Place On Earth (and blows Legoland out of the water, since you mentioned other amusement parks), it is suffering somewhat from less than perfect attention to detail - the detail that set Disneyland apart when I was a kid.

I'm not sure how much is a Disney issue, and how much is a problem with people just not taking pride in their work anymore. You simply can't train a 20 yr old whose mom never made him clean house to notice the scuff marks, the dirty corners, the gum, *and* consider it his duty to scrub off the scuffs, scrub the corners, scrape the gum.

DL is hardly falling apart - it's still kept up very well; it's just not as awesomely pristine as it was in the past.

 

[iKristin]

Yeah I get told that all the time. Even when I was working my other job in Oregon and traveling to Disneyland two to three times a year everyone would tell me to take that money and travel to other places and stop going to Disneyland. I never listened though

 

[nikkislaght]

Any work place will have employees that are NOT happy at their job. its a given... I would expect Disneyland to be on par with employee happiness and dissatisfaction, and there for depending on the day to go, you will get a good bunch of work folk, and a not so good...

Now as for your SIL,, you do realize that she will most likely hate and or find fault with most of your trip..

Reading between the lines and assuming alot from what you wrote she sounds like the kind of person that will be a downer because she doesnt want to be there to start with...

If I was in your position I would try to get her to change her mind and not go.. no point in all of you having a bad time because of one person..

and if she does go............ then its not up to you to make her have a great time.... she is the only one that can do that..

I would go, have the best time I can and not bother about things that she will complain about.. if she says its a waste of money for her maybe it is.. and therefor her problem that she "wasted" her money.. not yours.

I say to people who tell me there is more in the world than Disneyland..
Yup you are correct. and seeing that I have lived in 4 different countries..
traveled solo since I was 17yrs old (now 44) and seen a whole hell of a lot of the world... Disneyland is STILL the place I want to go to. end of....

 

[MadMim]

The way I see it, there are Disney people, and non-Disney people. The non-Disneys will never get it, and thats sad. My sanity gets questioned all the time ("You're going AGAIN?! Havent you already seen it all?"), but who cares?! No big deal! I want more!

I think Disneyland has become more popular than they ever imagined they would, and are having some trouble keeping up with the demand. That said, I also think they're doing a knock out job of maintaining, despite the demands. We have been to DL ten times this year, and only once (in peak season) would I say things seemed dirty or less than I expect from Disney. January is a great time to go! I have no doubt that you & your guest will have a tiggerific trip. Maybe the magic will overtake your SIL, and she'll join the ranks of the Disney people. Or maybe her magic is so squashed that she wont get it. Either way, you're sharing the magic, and thats a good thing. It might help to figure out what type of Disney person she could be. Is she a princess? An Adventurer? A thrill rider? A historian? You can try to make her trip special, but by no means ruin your own magic over it! I had to learn that one the hard way. You can only do so much to bring someone out of their stuffy shell. Have a great trip!

 

[lexecutive]

Being from hawaii a DL trip for a family of 7 is expensive and we could probably use the money for other expenses but I feel that the family time and my children's happiness is worth the price we pay.

 

[crystal1313]

All the time!! If your sister-in law doesn't think that watching the pure joy and happiness on her sons face is worth the cost of DL, then I don't think anything will change her mind. Going to DL with your children is powerful and emotional and just plain magical! Hopefully her attitude won't affect your trip and she will loosen up and have fun. I think even if Disneyland isn't as clean as you remember it as a kid, it is still wayyyyy cleaner and better maintained then say, a 6 flags park, at least IMO is is much, much cleaner! Have fun!!

My friend has a blog and I think he sums up the caring too much about Disney thing pretty well:

http://confessionsofadisnerd.com/2013/09/25/disnerds-and-proud-of-it/

 

[SingWithFlowers]

Yep there's the Dis and the non-Dis! I used to go every major holiday and definitely got a lot of flack for it. Whatever - just don't come rain on my parade. I've learned not to even invite anyone except Disney fans because others have gotten on my last dang nerve at the parks. Like, if they can't enjoy a classic Disney movie then they probably shouldn't come with me.

 

[Piglet99645]

I get that from friends all the time. In fact one friend was so critical the last time I was excited to go...... I kind of wondered why we were friends. (OK, there were other issues). But she was like "Nine days at WDW??? I would kill myself! All that plastic! Get out and see the real world."

I've seen it. Not all of it is beautiful. AT least I know at Disney even a bad time is still a good time.

P.

 

[Julylady]

The next time she says anything negative, I would look her directly in the eye and ask her why she is coming if she feels that way about Disneyland. I would tell her that if thats how she thinks, then it is probably best if she decides not to go now. If she says she is still coming, then tell her that from now on you don't want to hear any negative comments about it.

You need to put this back on her. You are already stressing about making this trip good for her to the extent that you are thinking that Disneyland doesn't measure up. Otherwise, you will spend your entire trip focusing on making a good time for her (which is probably what she wants!).

My advice is to stop it NOW.

 

[Piglet99645]

I guess I responded more to the subject line than the actual original post.

I agree with what others have said. If you don't want to confront your SIL, then you must decide FOR YOURSELF before you go that your SIL is a grown up and it is not your responsibility to make her happy.

I would be APATHETIC toward her complaints while on the trip. You don't want to get into a fight with her at the happiest place on earth.

Of course it's up to you if you want to confront this head-on before you go.

I've been on many vacations with people like this (including my mother and my ex) and I find that I have a good time in spite of them as long as my head is in the right place (My kids and I are going to have FUN, with or without the cooperation of the wet blanket).

Good luck.

 

[SMD]

I am a lifelong Disney lover and have done nothing but gush to her about how beautiful and well maintained the parks are, and how much better they are than other amusement parks, but now I've read things like Splash Mountain is in total disarray, there are broken light bulbs through the park, and there is garbage floating around.

I think you set yourself up with the superlatives right there. The park could be immaculate, but if someone dropped a food wrapper right in front of you and Disney didn't sweep it up immediately, she'd comment because you set the bar so high that Disney could never meet it. I agree with PP, stop trying to convince her.

 

[PHXscuba]

Just remind her she is doing the trip for her son and how much HE will love it, even if she just tolerates it. We all do things with and for our kids that wouldn't be our first choice of how to spend our money or time.

And even if regulars or longtime visitors notice small upkeep matters, a newbie will never see them because they have nothing to judge it against. Disneyland will still be cleaner, brighter, and a better atmosphere than any other amusement park, movie theater, or playground she's ever been to.

PHXscuba

 

[hootey]

Most of the negative comments from people I know, have to do with what a week long trip to DL costs. Of course, the ones that complain to me about all the money I am blowing at DL, are the ones that spend money on things I never would.
For example, one family member thinks nothing about dropping $300 or more on a single bottle of wine for dinner. One thinks he has to purchase the most top of the line import car every three of four years. Another has a custom built 5th wheel travel trailer(with the pickup to pull it) and new dirt bikes to go with it, for the three of four times a year he needs to travel the other side of the state to play in the sand for a weekend? Yet they tell I need to quit blowing my money on DL cause it costs too much?
Hey Jack, I spend a lot less money every year at DL than they do on their own likes.Oh well, to each, his own. They just like to complain because I do not spend my money on things they like, like expensive wine, expensive cars, and other things. Do I ask them about how much they spend on the "extras" in their lives? Hah, I just smile and tell them about all the fun we have at DL while they complain about not being able to afford to go themselves
Secretly, I am happy they can't invite themselves to go with us.Yeah, you just gotta be happy about some things in life and sometimes be thankful about people having hobbies and likes you just don't understand

 

[JazzyCatsAtDLR]

Any work place will have employees that are NOT happy at their job. its a given... I would expect Disneyland to be on par with employee happiness and dissatisfaction, and there for depending on the day to go, you will get a good bunch of work folk, and a not so good...

Now as for your SIL,, you do realize that she will most likely hate and or find fault with most of your trip..

Reading between the lines and assuming alot from what you wrote she sounds like the kind of person that will be a downer because she doesnt want to be there to start with...

If I was in your position I would try to get her to change her mind and not go.. no point in all of you having a bad time because of one person..

and if she does go............ then its not up to you to make her have a great time.... she is the only one that can do that..

I would go, have the best time I can and not bother about things that she will complain about.. if she says its a waste of money for her maybe it is.. and therefor her problem that she "wasted" her money.. not yours.

I say to people who tell me there is more in the world than Disneyland..
Yup you are correct. and seeing that I have lived in 4 different countries..
traveled solo since I was 17yrs old (now 44) and seen a whole hell of a lot of the world... Disneyland is STILL the place I want to go to. end of....

See, when I first started planning the trip, my SIL and brother were going to go to Vegas while just my mom and I were going to take their son. As I suspected she would, SIL got worried about missing out and has decided to come. One minute she's telling me she's excited, but then the next minute she's saying she could go to an all inclusive resort for the same price or less (but what fun would that be for her son?)

I just have to try to keep her in good spirits and if the park isn't as pristine as usual, I'll remind her that it's still nicer than other amusement parks and other amusement parks have to close down rides for refurbishment too. She's the type that thinks the world revolves around her and Disney should just make the park 100% perfect for when she's there.

Anyway, thanks for the advice

 

[JazzyCatsAtDLR]

Thank you all for your replies. I just get very defensive of Disneyland. Here's how I tried to explain it to my SIL (and it's probably going to sound crazy):

Disneyland is like a family member to me. Maybe it's not always perfect and I complain about it, but I still love it no matter what.

And I should have said this from the beginning: a lot of the problems my SIL has with Disneyland are because of my brother. He has been to Disneyland many times, but unfortunately, the magic didn't stick with him. He has said he likes it and if was offered a free trip would go, but he would rather go somewhere like Six Flags or Las Vegas. He has been making numerous negative remarks to his wife regarding their prices, calling them greedy, calling it a place for little kids, etc. Since he's her husband, she tends to want to side with him, naturally. Everything she knows about Disneyland comes from these three sources: My brother, me, and Disney-sponsored TV programs. What I keep telling them is this trip is really for their son and let's focus on making it a magical experience for him.

I know I take Disneyland too seriously. I just know it has always been a place of true happiness for me and it's important for me that my nephew enjoys it. I'm not his parent and won't get to decide where he goes on vacations, etc, but I would absolutely love for he and I to have that Disney bond that I have with my Grandma.

 

[disneydeb64]

I get the flack too. Even if I just TALK about going. There are always going to be those that just don't understand. I grew up with Disneyland, so I'll always have the DL love no matter what people say. Disneyland is a state of mind. You get it or you don't; different strokes for different folks, etc.

 

[Piglet99645]

I just have to try to keep her in good spirits and if the park isn't as pristine as usual, I'll remind her that it's still nicer than other amusement parks and other amusement parks have to close down rides for refurbishment too. She's the type that thinks the world revolves around her and Disney should just make the park 100% perfect for when she's there.

Anyway, thanks for the advice

So apparently your SIL is my mother....... which makes you....... my aunt or uncle?

Seriously, years of therapy to get to the place where I can say it is not my job to "keep her in good spirits." But I totally get it.

Have fun with or in spite of her!!!!!!

 

[tdashgirl]

Most of the negative comments from people I know, have to do with what a week long trip to DL costs. Of course, the ones that complain to me about all the money I am blowing at DL, are the ones that spend money on things I never would.

ITA! Pretty much everybody I've met that has said "why do you like Disney - it's so expensive" to me, has their own version of Disney Whether it be a fancy house, a new car every 3 years, a trip to Hawaii every year, etc. -- it's their happy place and where they choose to spend their money.

 

[tiffjoy]

A year ago, we went to WDW for our youngest's first birthday in January. My parents live in SC, so we invited them (and my little brother, 20 at the time) to go with us and paid as a Christmas gift. My dad was pretty sure it was for kids and he wouldn't like it, but he loves seeing his grand kids so said he would enjoy being with them and that was enough. My LB tried getting out of it at the last minute, and I guilted him into coming. my mom was very excited to go. But I know my family, and I knew they would enjoy it once they were there and wouldn't be negative. They had an amazing time! They let me lead, I organized it all, even breaking people off to go with my Dh to rides I knew they would like that others wouldn't or couldn't go on. My dad can't wait to go again! They all said it was the best vacation ever! We were scheduled to go this January, but our reason to go to FL (visit my in laws who vacation there in the winter) won't happen this year for various medical reasons. So they are planning to go in 2015 with us.

I would never go with people who would ruin it for us, but I knew my family would have fun, and if they didn't, they would not ruin ours and would keep their mouths shut. Vacation time is just too precious. I know many people who don't like DL- I wouldn't go with them. I always tell people who don't like Disney, great, less crowding for us then. We have two little girls. We love traveling, but right now, when they are so young, it's beach and Disney vacations, often combined. That's what they enjoy and they are family friendly activities.