Dis Breast Cancer Survivors Part II -GAGWTA!

[DeeCeeSW]

Linda,
So sorry about your BIL. Our best to you and your family.

 

[MerryPoppins]

I also have sad news. Our family doctor and good friend died unexpectedly this morning. I've known him for over 40 years. He was a dear friend of my family. He took off work to sit with my mother and DH when I had my mastectomy. We are very active with Boy Scouts and he was our Scoutmaster. His DD is my age and went to Sunday School and all through school with me. She is now my dentist.

My heart is very heavy today. He was also healthy as a horse. Exercised regularly, ate right and stayed thin. I guess we all have to go sometime.

My thoughts are with your family and friends, Linda.

 

[Amy]

I'm posting with a heavy heart this morning. Yesterday BIL (DH's brother) collapsed and died unexpectedly. He was young, healthy as a horse, and his children are around the same age as ours. Big Disney fan. Best man at our wedding. A great loss to those who knew and loved him.

Oh, Linda, how sad! I'll be keeping you and your family in my prayers.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

Merry - I am sorry to hear of the loss of your friend! My thoughts are with you, and with his family.

 

[laurabelle]

I'm posting with a heavy heart this morning. Yesterday BIL (DH's brother) collapsed and died unexpectedly. He was young, healthy as a horse, and his children are around the same age as ours. Big Disney fan. Best man at our wedding. A great loss to those who knew and loved him.

I also have sad news. Our family doctor and good friend died unexpectedly this morning. I've known him for over 40 years. He was a dear friend of my family. He took off work to sit with my mother and DH when I had my mastectomy. We are very active with Boy Scouts and he was our Scoutmaster. His DD is my age and went to Sunday School and all through school with me. She is now my dentist.

My heart is very heavy today. He was also healthy as a horse. Exercised regularly, ate right and stayed thin. I guess we all have to go sometime.

My thoughts are with your family and friends, Linda.

Linda and Melissa- I'm so sorry sistas...what a shock. Praying for you and all the loved ones,for comfort in your grief.

 

[BeadyLady]

Melissa and Linda! sorry to hear such shocking news, sorry for the great losses. Linda - to lose a close BIL is hard, may the support of your friends help you get through.

 

[MerryPoppins]

Thanks for the hugs. I feel better today, but still in shock. DH and I are still involved with Boy Scouts and our friend was our Scoutmaster. Our Scout family is going to have to really pull together to keep things running smoothly until things settle into a new routine. DH is working with a boy going for Eagle and it's almost time for him to meet with Doc before his board of review. We want to make sure this kid doesn't fall through the cracks. Doc wouldn't have wanted that to happen.

I also need to get our records switched to another doctor in the practice, but I hate to call his nurse today. She's been with him for about 25 years herself and I know she's devastated. But I don't like to be without a doctor, just in case something happens. In an emergency we'd see whoever the practice gave us and then it might be more tricky to move. We really want a young doctor that Doc had mentored. (In fact, he was one of our troop's Scouts in days gone by.) I don't know him personally, but Doc thought the world of him and there is a connection there. I've got my fingers crossed that he can take on the three of us....DD is still going to her pediatrician for one more year.

I guess I should get my act together and go buy a couple of sympathy cards. I really want to get them in the mail today. Thanks again for the support. I really am feeling a little better. He wouldn't have wanted his friends to sit around and mourn, so I'm going to try to laugh. He absolutely loved to laugh.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Merry, to you, too.

Thank you everyone. It was a really difficult weekend. DH is taking it very hard.

I appreciate all the thoughts and prayers, especially for his wife and children.

 

[Sha]

Thanks for the hugs. I feel better today, but still in shock. DH and I are still involved with Boy Scouts and our friend was our Scoutmaster. Our Scout family is going to have to really pull together to keep things running smoothly until things settle into a new routine. DH is working with a boy going for Eagle and it's almost time for him to meet with Doc before his board of review. We want to make sure this kid doesn't fall through the cracks. Doc wouldn't have wanted that to happen.

I also need to get our records switched to another doctor in the practice, but I hate to call his nurse today. She's been with him for about 25 years herself and I know she's devastated. But I don't like to be without a doctor, just in case something happens. In an emergency we'd see whoever the practice gave us and then it might be more tricky to move. We really want a young doctor that Doc had mentored. (In fact, he was one of our troop's Scouts in days gone by.) I don't know him personally, but Doc thought the world of him and there is a connection there. I've got my fingers crossed that he can take on the three of us....DD is still going to her pediatrician for one more year.

I guess I should get my act together and go buy a couple of sympathy cards. I really want to get them in the mail today. Thanks again for the support. I really am feeling a little better. He wouldn't have wanted his friends to sit around and mourn, so I'm going to try to laugh. He absolutely loved to laugh.

Merry
sorry to hear of your news too! Prayers for his family and coworkers.. and the scouts! I would agree about getting another MD (especially one he mentioned) under the circumstances is a smart move. Prayers for you too... a little better is a step in a good direction.

Thinking about all of you!!!

 

[NHAnn]

Oh my, such sad news. My thougths and prayers are with all the grieving families and friends.

Merry, your Doc sounds like a wonderful caring person. I'm sorry you have lost such a great doctor, as well as friend.

Linda, my heart aches for you all. So hard to find words...wishing you all peace and comfort.

Thinking of ALL of you here on the thread, each day, even though I'm not posting much.


GAGWTA!!

 

[laurabelle]

More sad news to pass along...Need a Disney Fix's mom passed away yesterday. I hate cancer.
http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1796818

 

[MerryPoppins]

Oh no. I'm so sorry to hear that news. I was hoping she'd rally and start to improve. My prayers for the family and their loss.

 

[violetshelby]

Hi everyone,
I haven't been on in awhile but I still come to read occasionally.So sorry to hear about all the bad news recently, my thoughts are with you Pea-n-me and Merry and also Disney Fix.
Looking Forward, Your post about your feelings after chemo. really spoke for me also. I finished chemo. Feb. 28th and I am now in the middle of Radiation, I feel kind of lost right now and I am also so scared of a recurrance. I seem to think about it all the time. I have been having back pain and although I am sure it is nothing I am still scared of the what if's. My Oncologist scheduled me a bone scan ,which I had yesterday She said to have it done if for nothing else than to give me some piece of mind. Now today my back is hurting worse than ever, I am hoping maybe it is all just stress related.
Just wanted to let you know you are not alone in your feelings. Violet.

 

[snappy]

Merry, sorry about your friend and doctor. It sounds like you lost a very close relative more than a friend. Prayers for his family at this time.

I am very agitated about Need a fix's mother's passing. It sounded as if the chemo agent was the catalyst. Very scary that the treatment that is intended to help us can be such a double edged sword.

I did not have chemo but it is still something I think about in case I have a recurrence and need it. Originally I was glad I could hold chemo in reserve so to speak if needed in the future. The more I learn about its effects, here and in my community, I am very queasy about it.

One of our volunteers passed this weeked, stage 4 pancreatic. She did not even last 2 months after diagnosis. We had dinner with her about 3 weeks ago and she looked good. Even a week ago she was working in the garden at the group home where she lived. I think she only had 1 round of chemo.

Violet, it is very normal to be worried about recurrence. I think the worry is much more acute in the early months and that the intensity of that worry fades a bit with time. However, I think it is something that is forever with you. If you can compartmentalize it somehow and not let it consume you, it will help. I wish I knew the answer to it, I don't. My 4 year cancerversary is coming up later this week, I can't say it ever leaves my mind.

I like to think the attention we continue to give it after treatment pushes us to be vigilant followup, not to mention as a living reminder to other women to consistently go in for mammograms and exams and to do self exams.

Awareness is the key. I am realizing that more and more as I participate in disability awareness events with my employer. We also do alot of PR with the state legislature.

I am finding this awareness thing very fascinating.

Trying to do an upbeat post here amid all the sadness. I think I have failed miserably, but here it is anyway.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

More sad news to pass along...Need a Disney Fix's mom passed away yesterday. I hate cancer.
http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1796818

Oh, how horrible! I just feel sick hearing this. Sending many hugs and wishes for peace to their family!

We are still missing many pieces of the puzzle for my mom's treatment, but it definitely makes me think twice about chemo. I guess it is usually the lesser of the evils, though.

I am feeling very guilty about our August trip. What kind of daughter plans a 2 week Disney trip when Mom is facing a summer of surgery and cancer treatment? And worse, I am excited about the trip. I'm ashamed to admit that.
DH took his entire vacation allotment for the year to go on this trip, and we are looking forward to it. I told Mom that I would like for all of us to go to WDW or DL next year once she is better, but we can't really plan that trip yet. So in the meantime I feel bad about the trip we already have in place. I do have it structured so I can leave WDW and go to Kansas if she needs me, or we can tweak the trip before we leave if we can tell that the current plan won't work. I guess it just feels selfish to be planning (and excited) about this trip.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

It sounded as if the chemo agent was the catalyst.

IME it is rarely that simple. Systems and situations are extremely complicated, more so than most people realize.

lookingforward (and violetshelby) - I intended to respond before about the fears you're now having. I was totally there, too, after treatment ended. Really hard times emotionally. In retrospect, I believe the emotional healing took far longer than the physical healing. Between both, it's akin to feeling like you got hit by a bus - for quite a while. I felt very alone in my worries even though I'm surrounded by good friends and family.

Things did get better over time, but with certain news and events, it definitely comes up again. I ended up with a bone scan in the first year, along with all kinds of other tests for various pains and ailments, but fortunately, they were ok. (I'm probably due for more, but I really don't even want to go there. ) If there's some way you can find to help your mind relax, that will help. It's not easy to do, though.

Right now my pain is for my husband. We've been together for 27 years and I've never seen hurting as much as he is right now. He was close to his brother and the pain he's in is just so deep. All I can do is be there for him. There is an autopsy involved so the time factor is longer than usual. My heart also goes out to my MIL as well as his wife and children.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

Linda - I am so sorry for your DH.
My DH is an only child, but his best friend was killed in a car crash 2 years ago. It was so very, very sad for everyone. I have never experienced a loss that was sudden and unexpected, so the grief was different.
Your family is in my thoughts, and OogieBoogieMan sends his condolences as well.

 

[Sha]

Need a Disney Fix ~ I am so sorry to hear about your mom. I cant fathom that and admit that I am fearful of that day. May the arms of God hold you up and keep you and your family strong along with Pea-n-Me's family and Merry Poppins during this sad time. And let me not forget to include our friends here who are going through treatments and tests.... Hugs to you all with boundless prayers for each of you.

 

[laurabelle]

~~~***GAGWTA sistas***~~~

Linda- I agree, I think each situation is uniquely complex...

jackskellingtonsgirl- A lot goes into the equation for making treatment decisions. There is new testing now for women with early stage cancer to determine if they actually need chemo or can do without. I'm not sure if your mom will end up fitting the profile, but here's some info: http://www.breastcancer.org/treatment/chemotherapy/new_research/20060126.jsp

My dr. still has not heard back on the insurance appeal. I am hopeful they will give an answer by the end of the week. The higher dose of Prednisone is helping, but I'm still sick. He is allowing me to continue to stay at home, so I'm glad not to be hospitalized! Mentally I'm healthy anyhow!

I found an incredible deal on a 3br condo at Windsor Hills booked through hotelopia. $449 for 7 nights! I have heard good things about WH homes, and thought this would be a great time to try it! So we're back on budget!

 

[Sha]

Laurabelle.. where is Windsor Hills?