DH just told his mom that we are going to WDW and she is pi$$ed

[growinupdisney]

she thinks we should save every dollar we have and not do vacations. She is 84 and thinks its stupid to waste our $$ and not save it all. My dh told her we got more back for taxes so we were going(even though we already had the trip planned months ago) We are getting $8500 back this year and we are only using about $1000 of it and the rest is going in to savings. We are able to afford the trip with not even using tax $ but thhought we would take about $1000 since it's anniversary and do some special things!

I just hate when people say you don't need to go and save your $$. We own our house have no cc debt our cars are just about paid for. All bills are paid on time and have $$ in savings! We deserve to take family vacations, my dh works 60 hrs a week and only gets 2 weeks vacation. One week is usually at WDW and another is in Myrtle Beach(that my grandparents pay for..family reunion). My dd will be graduating next year and our family vacations maybe getting less altogether with her going to college. I remember all my family vacations to WDW as a child and I want my kids to have those special memories. Yes, $$ is savings is goodand we have that but family time is just as important too.

 

[kamik86]

I have never understood the attitude to save all your money. I'm a saver, my husband will talk about time after time that I didn't buy something I wanted and had the money for because I didn't need it... but I still eventually buy the things I just take my time, I go on vacations (although I did have to be prodded for the first one) etc. Really what good is having tons of money if you don't enjoy any of it? Is the point to have millons at retirement? Will you do something fun with it then? Money isn't to be hoarded. It needs to be saved for emergencies, for retirement etc but it still does need to be spent or what is the point of working so hard for it?

 

[juliebean]

I would really ignore the MIL and have a GOOD time! It took us several years to get to this point - but we don't tell our families we go on vacation. It's not that they have a problem with us spending money, just jealous we are going and/or that it's not always visiting them. Really, some people's problems with what you do are really their problems and you can't let it bother you.

 

[Disneychix]

If your MIL is 84 I wouldn't let it get to me that much. (not saying that 84 is that old, but...) I mean there's probably more factors behind her saying don't go on vacation other than money. Maybe she wants time with your family and is upset that you are going away?
You don't have to justify a family vacation to anyone, certainly someone who doesn't know anything about your exact situation.

 

[Shmily1]

You can't take it with you so you might as well enjoy it! Have a great time!!! Don't let her both you.

 

[acjsmom]

My MIL is the same way and she is 81. You have to remember the time in which they grew up. Right after/during the Great Depression and times were tough. Their generation is used to working hard for very little money.

We invited my MIL to go along when we went to Disney the first time. My mother and brother jumped at the chance, but my MIL decided to stay home and save her money. She never spends anything even though her house is paid for, her car, and she has some savings. She is always thinking ahead about what might happen in the future. Not a bad way to be, but she is 81 and I say enjoy living.

Now, we could do a better job of saving, but we also realize our children are only going to be small for a short time. I say you have good arguments for going. If you are able to pay for it and your house is taken care of, you don't have cc debt and your child is still able to go to college next year, then enjoy yourself and don't worry about others.

 

[Jeff_G]

Do you realize that by getting a 8500 tax return you are giving up over $326 from you paycheck (assuming biweekly pay).

That aside if you have a 6 month emergency fund and no debt then by all means pay cash and go on vacation! No one know how much time we are going to be given here on earth.

 

[growinupdisney]

If your MIL is 84 I wouldn't let it get to me that much. (not saying that 84 is that old, but...) I mean there's probably more factors behind her saying don't go on vacation other than money. Maybe she wants time with your family and is upset that you are going away?
You don't have to justify a family vacation to anyone, certainly someone who doesn't know anything about your exact situation.

I would normally agree and understand this but she lives 3 min from our house my dd3 goes to her house ever week atleast 3 or 4 times. My dh goes by every day. We spend alot of time with her my dh sisters who live about 15 min see her about 1 a month. She is a saver and has a nice chunk of change in the bank and several investments that are doing well. She is the generation that thinks saving $$$ is the ONLY and right thing to do. She never vacationed until she was in her 60s. But when she was younger she owned a house at the beach that they used for their vacations.

This is really bothering me and I know it shouldn't but I put alot of effort into doing budget trips and saving $$ when we go I never splurge on myself at all through the year. This is my one and only thing I look forward to as well as the kids.

 

[RumpleMom]

Someone who is 84 is from the World War II generation. They have experienced rationing of sugar, butter,chocolate, nylons, green ink and other things I don't even know about, so our soldiers could be supplied. Your MIL went without in her life and doesn't want her loved ones to experience it, so she says to save for a "rainy day".

We now supply our soldiers without doing without on the home front. It is a different time.

My dad would tell me the same thing. Stay home and save your money because you never know what the future will bring.

It sounds like you have your finances under control and are not in debt. Go and enjoy your vacation because you can afford it and because "you never know what the future will bring".

 

[Sadie22]

Your MIL was born during the Great Depression. This could be a great opportunity to get her to talk about her childhood memories and what it was really like for her growing up. It can bring the family closer together and inspire the children to learn more history. And you may come to understand your MIL a little better. She may be channeling what her parents taught her and she may be worried about you.

When my children were little we bought books ("A Grandfather Remembers" and "A Grandmother Remembers") for the grandparents to fill out with their memories on various topics. My parents loved doing this and it is especially nice to have this now that my dad has passed away and my mother cannot write anymore. DFIL preferred to dictate his answers to me since his handwriting was shaky. He kept the boys entertained for hours with his stories. DMIL didn't write and wouldn't talk much about her childhood. It finally came out that her family's situation was much worse than anyone knew and it was painful for her to recall.

 

[melissapealo]

I would normally agree and understand this but she lives 3 min from our house my dd3 goes to her house ever week atleast 3 or 4 times. My dh goes by every day. We spend alot of time with her my dh sisters who live about 15 min see her about 1 a month. She is a saver and has a nice chunk of change in the bank and several investments that are doing well. She is the generation that thinks saving $$$ is the ONLY and right thing to do. She never vacationed until she was in her 60s. But when she was younger she owned a house at the beach that they used for their vacations.

This is really bothering me and I know it shouldn't but I put alot of effort into doing budget trips and saving $$ when we go I never splurge on myself at all through the year. This is my one and only thing I look forward to as well as the kids.

I wouldn't let it bother you. It is your money, not hers. Use it how you choose. Just simply tell her thank you for being concerned but that you have things under control.
Go on your vacation and enjoy the time with your family, don't let your mil's opinion ruin your trip.

 

[Pigeon]

I agree with the pps. Your MIL grew up right around the Depression and the years to follow. My ILs are the same way. They can't help it, it's part of their character. Try not to let it get to you.

I'd just say, "Thanks for your concern, MIL, but our finances are fine. Pass the bean dip." Repeat as necessary.

 

[FLA NUT]

my MIL is only 64 and still trashes us about going to WDW. She thinks WDW is for "rich people". Funny thing is she doesn't say a word if we spend a week at the beach and that is more expensive for us than a week at the world. After 20 years I have gotten used to it and do my best to ignore the comments but it is HARD!!!! Enjoy your trip with your family!!

 

[growinupdisney]

Do you realize that by getting a 8500 tax return you are giving up over $326 from you paycheck (assuming biweekly pay).

That aside if you have a 6 month emergency fund and no debt then by all means pay cash and go on vacation! No one know how much time we are going to be given here on earth.

No we got the tax credit because we sold our house and bought a new one in April of last year plus my dh has his real estate license he got the "comission" off the sell of the house. Our trip is paid for cash only we do not use cc.

 

[tlbwriter]

Yes, $$ is savings is goodand we have that but family time is just as important too.

Well, family time is important but it doesn't have to happen at WDW.

Anyway, as others have said, it can be hard for a person of her generation to see someone spending so much money on something as fleeting as a vacation.

 

[msucooper]

Disregard your MIL and enjoy your vacation. You shouldnt just work to pay bills. I refuse to just work to pay bills & save...I want to enjoy my $$ as well. I plan 2 vacations a year: 1 with just me & my hubby and the other with the family. HAVE FUN & ENJOY YOUR FAMILY VACATION.

 

[marie1203]

I don't think you should let her affect you in any way or form. It is your life, your money, you don't owe her anything. I have to put a stopped at the family comments a long time ago and I am only 24. When my family come out with something like that I will always answer "this is my life, my decision and my money, you lived your life how you wanted it, so now let me do the same. If I need help then I will ask your advice" I don't get those comments anymore. Dh does the same with his family as far as I am concern my family is DH and I and we are the ones that make the decision and what other think I could care less. I don't feel like you should give her an explanation if she is mad then let her.

 

[ceemys]

eh...go on your trip and enjoy! Someone that age has been through a lot and probably doesn't see the reasoning behind a great vacation.

 

[Tanzanite]

I say go for it life is to short you can afford it i feel like Suze Orman saying that Ilost my Dad 52 yrs old he saved up just got promotion had heart Life attack never forfilled his dreams so sad.Ifeel like you have 16 ryr old he may not want to or be able to go on many more vacations before college.Enjoy

 

[kristenrice]

My mother is giving me the same grief over our upcoming trip to Hilton Head. She thinks we should be spending the money on other things that are "more important". What she doesn't understand is that about 90% of the trip is being paid for with gift cards and rewards dollars that cannot be spent on anything but travel. Yes, the trip will be about $1800, but only about $200 of that is money that could be used elsewhere. I belong to so many rewards programs that I've been able to save up a bunch of "freebies". She just doesn't understand that this trip is costing us NOTHING out of our savings account...not even our VACATION savings account. DH is a full-time police officer and I am a full-time paramedic. He works days, I work nights so that our children have only 4 hours a week of "daycare" (at grandma and grandpa's house). Since we have only one day a week that we are all together, our vacation time is extremely important to us. My mom is certainly entitled to her opinion, but it isn't going to change anything....

...I just ignore her.