Cruised 5x as DINKS, now 1st with Baby!!!

[two-foxes]

Okay, so I have no clue how to cruise with a little guy! DH and I have enjoyed all on our 5 previous DCL cruises with no true worry of a budget, who will watch the little one when we are at the spa or how crowded the family beach is. So, in September we are headed for cruise shock and I am afraid! Our little man will be 15 mos and I have really NEVER paid any attention to what we could do with DS or better yet, how to do it and still have some adult time for DH and I!

Selfiishly, my only plans have been, so far, when DS will head to Flounders for a couple of hours. DH and I would like to hit Palo for dinner and/or Brunch, then enjoy a few hours on the adult beach on one of our double dip days. I have no clue of "how" to do DCL with a 15 month old! (I would RUN through, okay walk quickly through, the Mickey and Goofy pool areas on my way to the Quiet Cove for my coffee or Pina Colada!)

I know there have been some of you in our position....how did you adjust to a different DCL vacation and how did you make sure you enjoyed some of the adult magic you were used to while enjoying some great family time?

 

[sejejoemmiev]

Selfiishly, my only plans have been, so far, when DS will head to Flounders for a couple of hours. DH and I would like to hit Palo for dinner and/or Brunch, then enjoy a few hours on the adult beach on one of our double dip days.

I believe, although not certain, that there is only childcare for ages 3 and up at Castaway Cay(Scuttles Cove). I, for some reason, do not think Flounders is open during Castaway Cay, but I may be wrong! Maybe someone else can chime in for sure. I have only cruised with kids, so I have no idea what it must of been like to have all that WONDERFUL Adult only time. I can only imagine.........We have always done excursions for all ages, sat at the family beach and pool, and used the kids clubs and Flounders for Palo Dinner/Brunch and some Spa time. We have never experienced Entertainment on the Ship for Adults Only but on this next cruise it will happen!! I also plan on having an Adult only excursion at one port, and leaving the kids on the ship next time! You do have to make sacrifices, but the magic you see through their eyes makes it all worth it! Have Fun!!!

 

[CobraKai]

Selfiishly, my only plans have been, so far, when DS will head to Flounders for a couple of hours. DH and I would like to hit Palo for dinner and/or Brunch, then enjoy a few hours on the adult beach on one of our double dip days. I have no clue of "how" to do DCL with a 15 month old!

You didn't express any interest at all regarding your DS and his experience cruising with you, are you planning a "family" vacation whereby you spend time with DS getting character pictures, playing in the splash are, going to see the shows, playing on the beach (read huge sandbox), in the ocean, etc. If not, this would lead me to believe you might be better off getting a sitter and leaving the little one at home. It seems as though you are more interested in another adult-only vacation but feel the need to drag along a little one only to leave at Flounders as much as possible?!?

We just returned from a 4-night with a 12-month old and greatly enjoyed the experience, have tons of awesome memories and even more pictures and videos of it all. We used Flounders for some specific events (Palo, snorkeling excursion, late pirate party). Never got to CC and the snorkeling was canceled, but we did have time reserved for it, so it's open at least part of the time. I wouldn't change anything for the next cruise, it wouldn't have been the same without our DS.

Just remember, be flexible and patient, and you'll have a great time!

 

[trimix]

You didn't express any interest at all regarding your DS and his experience cruising with you, are you planning a "family" vacation whereby you spend time with DS getting character pictures, playing in the splash are, going to see the shows, playing on the beach (read huge sandbox), in the ocean, etc. If not, this would lead me to believe you might be better off getting a sitter and leaving the little one at home. It seems as though you are more interested in another adult-only vacation but feel the need to drag along a little one only to leave at Flounders as much as possible?!?

I noticed the same thing. If you are bringing him along because you feel you are supposed to, then see if you can leave him with a relative and enjoy a week away. Honestly, I don't see any reason to take a child that young on a Disney vacation - they may have fun at the moment, but they will not remember it. Wait until the child is four or five years old and he will have a memorable vacation.

 

[sejejoemmiev]

Never got to CC and the snorkeling was canceled, but we did have time reserved for it, so it's open at least part of the time.

Good to know Flounders is open on Castaway Cay. I just assumed it wasn't because the 3 year old's and up went outside to Scuttles Cove. I probably would not use it on Castaway Cay Day, because we love hanging out at the family beach with our kids, but it is good to know it is available if need be. Thank's for clarifying! Now the poster can hang out at the Adult Only Beach for a few hours. I have never been so I don't know what I am missing....

 

[two-foxes]

You didn't express any interest at all regarding your DS and his experience cruising with you, are you planning a "family" vacation whereby you spend time with DS getting character pictures, playing in the splash are, going to see the shows, playing on the beach (read huge sandbox), in the ocean, etc. If not, this would lead me to believe you might be better off getting a sitter and leaving the little one at home. It seems as though you are more interested in another adult-only vacation but feel the need to drag along a little one only to leave at Flounders as much as possible?!?

We just returned from a 4-night with a 12-month old and greatly enjoyed the experience, have tons of awesome memories and even more pictures and videos of it all. We used Flounders for some specific events (Palo, snorkeling excursion, late pirate party). Never got to CC and the snorkeling was canceled, but we did have time reserved for it, so it's open at least part of the time. I wouldn't change anything for the next cruise, it wouldn't have been the same without our DS.

Just remember, be flexible and patient, and you'll have a great time!

OUCH I suppose in my attempt to be brief and somewhat humurous and obviously niave in my post, I must have come across as someone who would rather lock their kid in the stateroom by your reply. Let me clarify....For starters, the little guy IS NOT staying with a sitter while we go on vacation, wouldn't dream of it. As we took our first trip with DS to WDW in Dec, it was a new type of vacation for us. I wasn't sure how to approach it, adjust our timeline and typical plans, etc, and what we were used to doing. I asked lots of friends who have done WDW with infants, got tons of great tips and had an amazing vacation. (And my favorite moment...I actually cried, was DS meeting Pooh.) In fact the many pictures from that trip are constantly flashing across my screen saver are getting me very excited for this next trip. I guess as a parent, I didn't feel the need to express that photos things like that are important. That is kinda a "duh". Since none of our friends have never sailed DCL w/ or w/out kids I came here for info.

Actually your post gave me some of the answers I was seeking. I have never waited in line to have photos with the characters, I have attending one character breakfast in all our cruises, and it is stuff I am not familiar with, so thanks for the ideas!

Let me be more specific with my questions.....the Mickey area always appeared to be insane! Is it as crazy in there as it always appears? What recommendations does one have with a tot in such a crowded area? Is waking up at 6 am recommended? Do most parents plan an escape at some point from the bustling there....if so what do you do that allows you some down time with your little ones? Are there any fun planned activities with tots? How have parents split their time to allow for that adult time we all need and seek? If you cruised previously as a couple and brought your new little one for the first time, what huge lesson did you learn and need to pass on? How was Flounders for your little one? Did you wish you would have brought your little one to something you didn't and vise versa? What tips do you have for the family beach? As this is a double dip, we'll be there all day one day.....yeah, and DS will be with us.....the adult beach day is for the other "dip" of the trip.....

Oh, and really, I don't think 6 or so hours in Flounders for 2 or so events is as "much as possible". We are spending a week at WDW prior to this cruise, so this is a true family vacation, but as all parents can understand, some mom and dad time is needed and deserved!

 

[two-foxes]

I noticed the same thing. If you are bringing him along because you feel you are supposed to, then see if you can leave him with a relative and enjoy a week away. Honestly, I don't see any reason to take a child that young on a Disney vacation - they may have fun at the moment, but they will not remember it. Wait until the child is four or five years old and he will have a memorable vacation.

I am trying to put my claws away, and I admit they are out....Vacations are for the family....DH and I love Disney and want our son to be in on it, too, no matter how young or how much he can remember. I fully understand he won't remember it, but he will laugh, smile and have fun in the moment, which is priceless to me. My memories to see him have fun. It's not like I am dragging him to some horrible kid hating place for vacation where there is no place for him. This is Disney, right?

My post was not meant to elude that our DCL trip will not be fun with a baby, it is saying I have no idea how to do DCL with a baby....what do they have, what have you done, what have you loved, what have you hated and how did you feel it was different or the same.....

Okay, claws are back in now.

 

[samily]

Hi there,
On one of our DCL cruises, one of our sons was 13 months old. He enjoyed sitting at the pool in the Mickey ear designated for babies - on our last cruise on the Wonder they had added a infant/toddler splash area behind the Mickey slide so they now how more room away from the bigger kids. The Magic does not have this yet, but I would think would be added while in drydock this year. He really loved everything & was in awe of the characters. We had a nap together on a hammock at Castaway Cay - that was wonderful! I have found for my kids that we head back to the cabin mid afternoon for some nap/down time & snacks and that helps them get through dinner. I would definitely recommend a verandah - you'll get a lot of use out of it during his nap times. We never ended up using Flounders but we did stop by to check it out & they seemed to be really attentive with the kids. Just make sure to pack plenty of diapers, wipes & basic infant medicines (tylenol, etc.) as it's rather pricey on the ship & on one cruise another family mentioned the shoppes were out of the size diapers their DD needed.

We're actually in the opposite situation as you - we are thinking of taking a 3 night vacation without the kids - for the first time in 9 years! So I need to know the secrets of an adult only DCL cruise!

I'm sure you'll have a great time -enjoy!

 

[Cobbo]

OUCH Let me clarify....For starters, the little guy IS NOT staying with a sitter while we go on vacation, wouldn't dream of it. As we took our first trip with DS to WDW in Dec, it was a new type of vacation for us...Since none of our friends have never sailed DCL w/ or w/out kids I came here for info.

First, relax ...it'll be all good. The fact that you've cruised DCL will only be an advantage, because you're already familiar with your home away from home. As you've already learned from your recent family trip to WDW, doing Disney with a child is just a different angle from Dink'n....

thankfully DW & I are lucky to live close enough to be able to enjoy some trips with the DDs and some without - and feel no guilt for planning some adult time for keeping our sanity during the family trips.... After all, nothing will help you cope with the great, big, beautiful tomorrow,

like a nice relaxing dinner at V&A while you know the little ones are safe & sound back at the Poly with an in room sitter (or DMom & a bottle of wine for her sake... )

Let me be more specific with my questions.....the Mickey area always appeared to be insane! Is it as crazy in there as it always appears? What recommendations does one have with a tot in such a crowded area?

The Mickey area is a bit kooky - and your biggest problem will be that you can't take a child in a swim diaper into the pool, so you'll be spending time in the kiddie sprinkler fountain area. We ran into the same thing with our DD1 when we took when she was 18mo old, and she loved it (although she did climb into a Mickey Ear before we learned "the rules")...

unfortunately, I have no photos of DD in the splash zone, but I do have lots of heart-smiling memories...

Is waking up at 6 am recommended?

NO! - It's a vacation!!! Now if your DS is an early riser, you might not have an option (there's only so much that little divider curtain in the cabin will do to convince him that Mommy & Daddy are still sleeping & he shouldn't play loudly ) But hey, only you know your family. For me, I would sneak out of the cabin while DW & DD were still sleeping, enjoy some quiet time & bring back some grub for them to nosh on while DW got done in the morning, and to appease DD1 (she's grumpy when she doesn't get food in the am)...

Do most parents plan an escape at some point from the bustling there....if so what do you do that allows you some down time with your little ones?

Yup. For us, we had a nap time in the middle of each day. We put DD down in her pack n play and DW & I enjoyed some time out on the veranda, or just chillin' on the bed with a book...just one pointer - pay attention to the navigators if you're thinking about heading back to the boat for a naptime during CC days, b/c sometimes they shut down the elevators & for us, that meant a long climb back up to deck 8 with a tired DD

How have parents split their time to allow for that adult time we all need and seek?

For us it's not too difficult. I'm an early riser, so I would take care of DD in the am (and take her out & about to let DW enjoy her favorite activity - Snooooooooooring), and then DW would take the late shift and "watch" DD while she slept in the cabin so I could stay out ridiculously late watching movies on the jumbo-tron or taking down an adult beverage or two with some friends...

How was Flounders for your little one?

Can't answer this one, as we registered for it, but never used it. We found we never needed it. DD did great at the dinners,

and the one thing we "missed" by having her with us was that we didn't do Palo's. Personally, I see nothing wrong with you reserving your full 6 hours (and even seeing if you can have more if you want once on board) in order to get in some grown up time at Palo's or the Spa. That's what it's there for, that's what it's marketed for, and that's one of the reasons to cruise DCL...so you know your kids are safe and having fun in an area you trust while you're still getting some time to breathe.

We are spending a week at WDW prior to this cruise, so this is a true family vacation, but as all parents can understand, some mom and dad time is needed and deserved!

You tell 'em sister...

 

[acourtwdw]

I don't have anything to add since I have never cruised with an infant. I wanted just to say, please don't let other people tell you how to vacation. Some people on the boards should listen to Thumper- if you don't have something nice to say, then don't say nothing at all.

Enjoy your vacation

 

[Tarabra]

We were in the same predicatment as you. We Dinked it 5 times, then cruised w/ DD20 months. Yes, it was a TOTALLY different experience, not quite as relaxing, but fun in a different way. Yes, we actually WENT to the shows. Be sure to sit on the outside. DD got bored quickly when there was any downtime, so i would walk her outside, then once the music started, walk her back in. Dinners weren't too good. She got very antsy after about 1/2 hour. They would hurry up and bring her food right out, which was great, but then she'd be done and bored while we were eating. After the 3rd day, we asked them to bring her food w/ ours and we brought a DVD player. Someone later suggested to take your child to Flounders after about 1/2 hour. Great idea. I think we will do that next week when she will be going to the kids club. She's 3.5 now. We also have DS9mon. Another biggie was not being able to take the steps which we've always done. We usually had the stroller w/ us. DH and I took turns having alone time. We used to do this anyway. I liked the sun and Deck 10 and he liked the shade on Deck 4. We went to Palo and left DD at Flounders. I went down to peek in on her through the 2 way mirror and she was screaming. They told me not to let her see me and that she would be fine. They asked if she might be hungry or tired. I said def. tired. They told me to go ahead and leave and enjoy my time. When we came back, she was out cold in the crib. The ports weren't good. She was bored w/ the shops and the sidewalks weren't too conducive to a stroller. She absolutely LOVED the beaches. We are double dipping next week. It's going to be an even different experience w/ a younger baby, but he's a little more easily entertained or will probably fall asleep. He's not crawling yet, but almost. I'm actually hoping he doesn't start in the next week or two because he will want to be all over the place. It's killing me to not be working w/ him on crawling. As others have mentioned, it's just fun watching things through their eyes. DD sort of remembers the last cruise, but always says, "tell me about the Disney Cruise." So I tell her about it often and we look at pics. You will have a great time.

 

[two-foxes]

This is what I am looking for....thanks, you guys!

 

[mandap]

We cruised twice before we had ds and this actually made it easier on us. He was 20 mths. when we went. We planned it as our "laid back" cruise. No real plans, no excursions, just went with the flow. We didn't feel bad about missing things because we had cruised before and knew we would be doing it again. Slept until he woke up in the morning. One thing that helped us was pushed his naps back later. This was easy because being in a different exciting place, he wanted to play until he dropped. So he napped around 4 and then was good to go through late dining. Played in the splash pad on Nassau day after a quick walk down to the straw market and Hard Rock Cafe for his first HRC shirt. We bought the sand toys in the Mickey Head container on Castaway Cay and he was happy most of the day between 2 chairs playing in the sand. DH snuck away to snorkel and I played later. The big thing was that we weren't stressed about missing anything. We went by his schedule and still had our one night away for "mommy daddy time"

 

[CobraKai]

OUCH I suppose in my attempt to be brief and somewhat humurous and obviously niave in my post, I must have come across as someone who would rather lock their kid in the stateroom by your reply. Let me clarify....For starters, the little guy IS NOT staying with a sitter while we go on vacation, wouldn't dream of it. As we took our first trip with DS to WDW in Dec, it was a new type of vacation for us.

I wasn't sure how to approach it, adjust our timeline and typical plans, etc, and what we were used to doing. I asked lots of friends who have done WDW with infants, got tons of great tips and had an amazing vacation. (And my favorite moment...I actually cried, was DS meeting Pooh.) In fact the many pictures from that trip are constantly flashing across my screen saver are getting me very excited for this next trip. I guess as a parent, I didn't feel the need to express that photos things like that are important. That is kinda a "duh". Since none of our friends have never sailed DCL w/ or w/out kids I came here for info.

Actually your post gave me some of the answers I was seeking. I have never waited in line to have photos with the characters, I have attending one character breakfast in all our cruises, and it is stuff I am not familiar with, so thanks for the ideas!

Let me be more specific with my questions.....the Mickey area always appeared to be insane! Is it as crazy in there as it always appears? What recommendations does one have with a tot in such a crowded area? Is waking up at 6 am recommended? Do most parents plan an escape at some point from the bustling there....if so what do you do that allows you some down time with your little ones? Are there any fun planned activities with tots? How have parents split their time to allow for that adult time we all need and seek? If you cruised previously as a couple and brought your new little one for the first time, what huge lesson did you learn and need to pass on? How was Flounders for your little one? Did you wish you would have brought your little one to something you didn't and vise versa? What tips do you have for the family beach? As this is a double dip, we'll be there all day one day.....yeah, and DS will be with us.....the adult beach day is for the other "dip" of the trip.....

Oh, and really, I don't think 6 or so hours in Flounders for 2 or so events is as "much as possible".

In your OP you listed 4 events (Palo dinner, [and] Palo brunch, the adult beach, and the spa) and you appeared to just be getting started. To me that looks like a minimum of 10 hours, assuming your not on the beach very long. From your OP, I don't think I was out of context.

We are spending a week at WDW prior to this cruise, so this is a true family vacation, but as all parents can understand, some mom and dad time is needed and deserved!

Just based on the age of your DS, it will certainly be a different vacation. It looks like he was about 6 months in Dec and will be walking during this trip. I read some comments on here about the difficulty some parents have when their kids are learning to walk and want to be down all the time on the ship.

As another person mentioned, the Wonder has a separate splash area for infants, which I never saw crowded. Some kids are not used to sitting for long meals at restaurants, so you may want to prepare him, or request quick service during dinner as this can be stressful for the parents. Using Flounders at night is a good option, especially since your DS will just be sleeping anyway, and will give you and DH some adult time, for the hot tubs or the clubs.

I don't recall many activities planned for such little ones, but there are fun things to do around the ship, like exploring all the different decks, playing bingo, visiting the characters, hanging out on the deck chairs in the sun watching the older kids. You could improvise too, use a soft-sided rolling cooler like a chariot and pull DS around the less busy areas to mix up the fun (after removing the beer and ice of course). At that age, they just like to grab stuff and wave it around, see what he can do with an air hockey paddle during a game of air hockey in the arcade.

We didn't bother lugging around a stroller everywhere, they're still light enough to be carried anyway, or use a Baby Bjourn carrier, it will be much easier. I would say don't bring as much food, they can chop/grind up anything you might need, and there's whole milk available in cartons (room service, beach blanket, etc.) or on deck 9.

Enjoy the double dip, and WDW too!

 

[CobraKai]

I wanted just to say, please don't let other people tell you how to vacation. Some people on the boards shoud listen to Thumper- if you don't have something nice to say, then don't say nothing at all.

Enjoy your vacation

I'm pretty sure that was the intent of her post however, as she stated "I have no clue how to cruise with a little guy" - what are our replies supposed to be other than suggestions?

 

[two-foxes]

Thanks for ideas CobraKai, that was the intent of my post.

In your OP you listed 4 events (Palo dinner, [and] Palo brunch, the adult beach, and the spa) and you appeared to just be getting started. To me that looks like a minimum of 10 hours, assuming your not on the beach very long. From your OP, I don't think I was out of context.
Read again. I mentioned the spa as things we used to do....on this trip we are planning on doing Palo for brunch and/or dinner, (so that is definately one event, but maybe 2, haven't decided yet) and a couple of hours CC. So, you are out of context when you say "as much as possible." That would be for breakfast, lunch and dinner, spa time, both CC days and our Nassau day....don't you think? Not for one, maybe 2 meals (out of 15) and a couple of hours on a beach.

I took offense to that, which I don't do alot on these boards. I hate nit picking and when others do it, but really...

I do appreciate your true advice of things and ideas of things for someone cruising with a baby for the first time.

 

[shmoogrrrl]

I know there have been some of you in our position....how did you adjust to a different DCL vacation and how did you make sure you enjoyed some of the adult magic you were used to while enjoying some great family time?

We took three Disney cruises before we had our baby. We took her for the first time when she was 10 months and traveled with friends who had a 15 month old.

I can tell you that the experience is very different with a wee human child. We still managed to do everything that we wanted to do though, we just had to be more creative. We did the spa in shifts and made sure that we worked in times for naps. My biggest recommendation is that if you can, get a balcony. That is a GREAT place to relax and enjoy the water while your little one is sleeping.

The dining staff was great with our kids. They both really liked Bananas so every night when we arrived at dinner there would be two plates with bananas already cut up. They also offered to get us anything that we would possibly need for the kids to eat.

My daughter loved to see the characters but I'll warn you that our friends 15 month old was terrified of them. My girl never has been so that part depends on your child. Katie loved to go for walks around the ship and play at Flounder's Reef. She had a wonderful time on the trip and I am sure that your little guy will too!

Make sure you bring all the diapers and baby medicines that you might possibly need. They have that stuff on the ship but it isn't likely to be your preferred brand. The kiddies seem to like to get little colds and such on trips so be prepared!

Also, I know some people have mentioned waiting until your little one was older. I say that there is NO reason to wait if you plan to go back. I mean if it was a once in a lifetime vacation then I could understand waiting, but you will have wonderful memories with your little one on this cruise and he will love to look at pictures!

We took Katie back when she was three and it was easier since she could use the kids clubs, but overall I think both trips were just as wonderful! We are expecting our second in October of this year and I wouldn't think twice about taking him/her as a baby!

 

[shmoogrrrl]

A few more things:

Go to Palo High Tea, Brunch, and Dinner if you can get the Flounder's time. They will do all they can to keep your little one happy, the little guy will enjoy having toys to play with, and you will get big people time with your spouse. I don't see why having a child on-board has to keep you from doing the things that you want to do. Heck, go swimming in the adult pool afterward if you have the time! At that age, as long as he can handle the nursery, he won't be missing out on anything.

Another thing to be careful of. Although your wee one will likely be walking fairly well by then, keep a good eye on him when he is walking around. Poor Katie was cruising on furniture and just learning how to take a few steps on her own when we went and the rocking of the ship threw her totally off balance. I swear the kid looked like one great big bruise by the time we got off the ship. Our friend's 15 month old had the same problem. but not as bad. She could walk on her own and had a little bit better balance.

Also, the track on deck 4 was one of my gal's favorite places. She loved to stand by the railing and watch the water go by. She also loved walking around on the 'track.'

 

[CRSNDSNY]

Okay, so I have no clue how to cruise with a little guy! DH and I have enjoyed all on our 5 previous DCL cruises with no true worry of a budget, who will watch the little one when we are at the spa or how crowded the family beach is. So, in September we are headed for cruise shock and I am afraid! Our little man will be 15 mos and I have really NEVER paid any attention to what we could do with DS or better yet, how to do it and still have some adult time for DH and I!

Selfiishly, my only plans have been, so far, when DS will head to Flounders for a couple of hours. DH and I would like to hit Palo for dinner and/or Brunch, then enjoy a few hours on the adult beach on one of our double dip days. I have no clue of "how" to do DCL with a 15 month old! (I would RUN through, okay walk quickly through, the Mickey and Goofy pool areas on my way to the Quiet Cove for my coffee or Pina Colada!)

I know there have been some of you in our position....how did you adjust to a different DCL vacation and how did you make sure you enjoyed some of the adult magic you were used to while enjoying some great family time?

Oh, HOW EXCITING!

Check out this TR I did of our first cruise with our children (they were 2y8mo and 5mo at the time of sailing) this past December. Hopefully this will help you a little bit. Prior to this cruise, we cruised 5 times without kids.

 

[CobraKai]

I mentioned the spa as things we used to do....on this trip we are planning on doing Palo for brunch and/or dinner, (so that is definately one event, but maybe 2, haven't decided yet) and a couple of hours CC. So, you are out of context when you say "as much as possible."

I didn't fabricate the perception that you were looking to repeat your previous cruise experiences but this time with a 15-month old.

Two-foxes, these are your words, not mine:

"who will watch the little one when we are at the spa"

"there will be no spa time (still toying with that one, though!)"

with the latter in the context of not having enough budget as the reasoning.

(I would RUN through, okay walk quickly through, the Mickey and Goofy pool areas on my way to the Quiet Cove for my coffee or Pina Colada!)

"As much as possible" may have been slightly exaggerated, but the perception you set forth in your OP was: I'm used to cruising as DINKs and I'm not ready to change that experience because kids interfere with your concept of relaxing or enjoying yourself.