Can I disown them now?

[Pop Daddy]

let me go, I do laundry

 

[canwegosoon]

Geek Chic...you know I can' t believe how petty people can be...you are so great for caring for your Dad/ MIL and taking him to disney (and your future trip with MIL)...I am so happy that you have these special memories for your family.

Diane and Chrissie, it looks like Pop Daddy will be sharing laundry duties on the next trip

It feels much better to vent, and hear everyone elses venting too...My family drives me

 

[Hillbeans]

Canwegosoon,

Please don't take this the wrong way, but I think they are trying to send you a hint and you're not getting it. I know they are your family however how many times are you going to let them ruin events of yours before you decide enough is enough?

I know it hurts you and it seems like you're a really nice, caring person however i'd probably (IMO) try to cool it with them for a few months and see if they come around. My husband has a sister whom he's not spoken to in years (she was incarcerated for a bit). I know deep down he's very hurt by their distance, however you can't make someone want to spend time with you.

Hugs to you, and enjoy your own trips to WDW.

 

[canwegosoon]

Hillbeans...I know what you mean...and your right...how many times do they have to do this stuff before I get the hint...but I am more upset that they (Godmother+aunts) won't include my kids(I would like my kids to know their aunts/cousins). There's tons of stuff going on here that I can't post...but your right...I am moving on, and trying to concentrate on my immediate family Thanks for the Hugs!!!

 

[crazyforgoofy]

I'm sorry your sisters are being awful to you, canwegosoon. My sister and I are 14 years apart in age and many miles apart (me in Missouri, she in Wisconsin) but we're still sisters and though we don't agree on everything we are very close. I know I'd be heartbroken if she treated me the way your sisters are treating you. My suggestion is to find a new "family". Perhaps some of your best girlfriends can substitute. A trip with people you choose to associate with might be more fun than a trip with people who are genetically related to you but don't share the same values or lifestyle.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I agree with CrazyforGoofy and Hillbeans. As hard as it is you need to not rely on these people for your happiness because they just don't seem to have it in them. Very sad, indeed.

My husband had to write is brother off because his brother refused to accept me because my DH isn't as strict in his religion as his older brother is. His brother said that my DH should divorce me and find someone else. Nevermind that we have 4 children and have been married many years (Sunday will be 22 years). Nevermind that I converted to said religion and we are raising the children in this religion. Nevermind that we are good, moral, and ethical people, religion aside. My husband was so torn up about this, but once he accepted that there wasn't anything that he was willing to do to make this relationship work with his brother (IE, nothing would ever be good enough for his brother), my husband quit loosing sleep over it and is much happier. He did see his brother a year ago, but knows that they will never have a brotherly relationship.

You know they saying, "you need to plant your own garden, nourish your own soul". Difficult, but true.

T&B

 

[GeekChic]

You know they saying, "you need to plant your own garden, nourish your own soul". Difficult, but true.

this is so true, T&B! your family situation sounds a lot like mine, i can sympathize!

i too have built a 'family' for myself from my husband's family (who are wonderful) and friends who make up where my family has let me fall.

it still hurts not to see my sister, especially when i happen to come across something that reminds me of her or a picture from an old trip. but what can you do? you just gotta keep going on...

((((((((hugs))))))))))

to those who said she isn't 'getting the hint', i just wanted to say that it's kind of hard to accept that your family doesn't want you. it takes time to learn to live with it. unless you've been through it its something that can't be explained.

geek

 

[cdnmickeylover]

Families are weird. My mother is annoyed because we are going back to WDW in October without her. Ok, so you might think well then why don't you take your mother -- well because she doesn't want to go with us! She only wants to go to WDW with my DB, DSIL and their 3 kids because she wants to see WDW through the 'kids' eyes. My DS is 18 now and she did go with us when he was younger. (DS is not coming on this trip as Disney is 'boring'.)My niece and nephews are almost 4, 2 and one month -- they aren't going to WDW anytime soon (or at least til the new one learns to sleep during the night . )

Bottom line is that she's mad because we aren't taking her but yet says she doesn't want to go without DB etc. who can't go because my DB is looking for a new job and won't have vacation time and they just had a new baby.

Irony is that my mother is never going to go with DB and DSIL as my DSIL wouldn't be able to put up with her that long. My mother constantly tells my DSIL that the kids are eating wrong, sleeping wrong -- you get the idea. Sometimes I'm surprised that my DSIL is as polite as she is.

Make your own family and don't worry about it. Last year my mother's reaction bothered me but this year I'm just ignoring it because there's nothing I can do about it anyway.

 

[GeekChic]

oooooo. moms.

my mom will not travel, in fact she is phobic and rarely leaves her house. so she gets mad at me for taking my dad on vacation with me! she actually said about our upcoming trip "you should have gone and not told him!" i said, "like i could do that!"

she wants him to stay home all the time but he can't stand that, why should he miss out on WDW with his only granddaughter?

families are weird!!!

 

[Tigger&Belle]

GeekChic, families can be difficult for sure. I think that a mini-series could be made from my DHs family. Hmmm, maybe mine, too, but we're a bit more normal.

cdnmickeylover, That is strange about your mother. Maybe she just doesn't know what she wants.

Then there's my poor mother--we've been to Orlando (WDW and/or Universal) several times. Most times were my DH and all my kids (3-4 kids, depending on the year), once I met my oldest sister there, and last Feb my youngest (4yo) and I met my sister. My mother dropped a couple of VERY subtle hints about Orlando, mentioning that she has a timeshare. Duh, she wanted to be invited. I think I needed to be clobbered over the head with a 2 x 4! The end result is that I'm going down in early December with my 4yo and meeting my sister and my mother for my 81yo mother's first trip to WDW. I'm trying to stay realistic about the trip --my mother can't get around like she used to, can't go on all the rides like she could have 20 years ago, and she is a penny-pincher. I figure that I will buy all her restaurant meals and we'll eat in the timeshare whenever possible. I will treasure this time!

And I realize that that kind of a trip will NEVER happen with my DH's family. They used to live down the street from DisneyLand and rarely went and when they would go they hardly do anything and be ready to go home early.

T&B

 

[2MuchOhana]

If it is any consolation my DH has written off his entire family! This time I think it will be for good! It's hard completely give up; and we have tried many times to work our differences out with them!
In fact, we are suppose to be in the middle of doing that currently. It's sad but they are doing very little to try to make things work! We invited them to Disney twice last year. First time was for our daughter's 2nd birthday. They couldn't come. They were taking their other granddaughter on a three week camping trip instead. They would just be getting home; and had no interesting in sharing in the celebration at WDW. We offered to pay for the entire trip that time. The second time was in December. They agreed to come; but two weeks before the trip they picked a fight with DH and cancelled it. They later took the other granddaughter to Florida with them.

Our family is getting smaller and smaller all the time. We're not perfect by any means but we do love Disney! You are more than welcome to join the rest of our happy but little family! My sister might grate on your nerves but what are sisters for? My parent's are truly great though.

Sorry we won't be going to WDW when you will be next year. We are going with my parents over Thanksgivng this year and planning a trip in September 2005!

Count your blessings for those that love you; for the rest of them it is their loss!