At what age is it appropriate to give your child a cell phone?

[wishesuponastar]

I think it really goes by each child. My DD-13 had a Firefly at age 7 (you could only call parents on that phone). We had just moved into a new home and she was outside with friends alot. Sometimes she would go in the homes of these friends so we felt better that she had a phone. She never had to call us and actually she lost the phone but we found it in our home years later. She got a real phone at age 11 (5th grade). It is very re-assuring for her to have one for when she walks home from school or when she is in the mall walking with friends and I am in the food court.

Now my DD-9 never has got a phone and she's not all that social as her sister. She is going to 5th grade in September and I still don't think she will get one. She will be riding the bus to school. We'll take it day by day with her. If she goes to a sleepover, I will give her my phone to use that night. However, she feels she should get one like her sister did in 5th grade. We just don't feel she needs it because she is always home alot.

 

[robinb]

I bought my DD a phone when she was 10-years old right before we went on a trip to WDW. I wanted to be able to keep in touch with her and I was tired of carrying walkie talkies. We went with a PAYG plan with Page Plus Cellular which has the longest top-off time of any of the plans. It's 120 days between when you need to add minutes. If you have a young child they really won't be using the minutes the same as a teen or adult.

 

[wishesuponastar]

My 4th grader had to write a persuasive letter for getting a cell phone:

In my opinion, fourth graders should have cell phones. First of all, if there is an emergency they would need to call 911. For example, someone could try to violently kidnap him/her. Another reason is if the fourth grader is at an exciting sleepover they might need to call their mom or dad. For instance, if he/she needed something they could call their parent. Also, if the fourth grader got home from school and their parents weren't home they could call them. The student might need to do this because they might be worried because they're locked out and are alone. If this paper is very persuasive, I would like an LG Shine.

The teacher told DD that she has some very convincing reasons. I, however, did not agree so DD doesn't get a phone yet

 

[Poohforyou]

Well I'm from Canada so our schooling is a little different. There is no "Middle school", it's just elementary, jk - grade 8, and High school, 9- grade 12.

I gave my daughter her cell phone in grade 8 for graduation. Some students had one before then but why on earth would you need one before grade 6?

Quite a few kids in DD's elementary school had cell phones for a variety of reasons - both parents work, parents divorced, kid walks/rides bike home, kid spoiled rotten .

 

[MouseEarsJenny]

My kids have had them since they were very young - about 10 years old. They have them so we can keep track of them when they are away from us. Our high school has a very small marching band, so they recruit younger kids to join the band - they were both marching at universities several hundred miles from home and on overnight band trips by age 10. There's no earthly way I would let them do that without some way to contact me. (Although truthfully, I'm always in a hotel room down the hall on those overnight trips.) The band director makes everyone take out a cell and call parents 15 minutes before they get back at school for away games. When they're coming home based on when the game ends rather than a set time, they really need to be able to call from the bus.

I'm really glad we have unlimited texting though - my oldest (14) racks up about 9,000 texts a month!

 

[libgirl1]

We don't have to worry about it yet. So far as the rule stands if you can afford to pay for your phone you can have one.

I am with superme80 on this one. I had a discussion with a middle-schooler (family friend) who told me that her parents didn't feel the need to get her a cell phone. Since so many kids have them these days, if there truly was some sort of emergency, she could get access to a phone.

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

My DS (12) and in 6th grade just got one last Christmas. Basic phone with a keyboard,,,,no data plan.

I don't care what other people do, but for my son IMOP he does not need a data plan on his phone. He doesn't get that many emails and has no FB account. If he needs to search the web he can do that from our desk top. I refuse to pay $30.00 a month so he can show off a smartphone.

We had no trouble finding a phone from Verizon without a data plan with a keyboard for him. DH and I did upgrade to unlimited texting.

He rarely talks on the phone but texts his friends all the time. And I do have to admit , he is "more in the loop" since he got his phone.

 

[pyrxtc]

Besides, if your child doesn't have a cell and you let them go anywhere like the movies or such without an adult, how are they supposed to get you if they need you?

Well, movies start at specific times and end after the running time is over. I remember going to the movies with my friends and my mother was there to pick us up when the movie was over. We also got dropped at the mall and were told to be at this spot at a specific time to be picked up. No cell phone or phone call required. I walked everywhere and didn't have to call when I got there, just if I wasn't going to be home on time (but I better had been home on time).

 

[Missy1961]

I'm not a parent, but I am an aunt of 14. My sisters got their oldest kids a cell phone when they started middle school. Neither kid got a data plan, but they do have texting. I love the fact that they have cell phones--I get phone calls & texts from them for no reason other than they wanted to say hi. It's wonderful to be able to connect with them whenever.

 

[MM27]

I teach 4th grade, so 9 and 10 year olds with an 11 year old thrown in every now and then. I'd say about 1/2 the kids have cell phones. I've had a couple of them that have told me that their parent makes them call them at work as soon as they leave the school building and the parent will talk to them as they walk home from school.

I will say that a lot of them have nicer phones than I do.

 

[LisaR]

Well, movies start at specific times and end after the running time is over. I remember going to the movies with my friends and my mother was there to pick us up when the movie was over. We also got dropped at the mall and were told to be at this spot at a specific time to be picked up. No cell phone or phone call required. I walked everywhere and didn't have to call when I got there, just if I wasn't going to be home on time (but I better had been home on time).

Most of us on this message board grew up the same way. We didn't have pagers or cell phones when I was a kid. But, if we do things based on how our childhood was, we also shouldn't make our kids wear seat belts or helmets or use a computer for homework purposes. Technology is a great thing and this generation has embraced it. Most of my generation has embraced it too, even though we don't like to admit it. I'm know I am not still listening to 8-Tracks just because it is what I had back in the dinosaur age. Is a cell phone truly necessary for most kids? Probably not but I like the peace of mind it brings ME and the kids like the easy way they can communicate with their friends. Seems like a win-win to me.

 

[goofy!]

I am with superme80 on this one. I had a discussion with a middle-schooler (family friend) who told me that her parents didn't feel the need to get her a cell phone. Since so many kids have them these days, if there truly was some sort of emergency, she could get access to a phone.

So, you won't get your kid a cell phone, yet expect kids who do have cell phones to let your child use their paid for minutes if she needs them? What if the child is paying for their own minutes with their own babysitting money and has limited minutes?

You really think this is ok to mooch off their minutes?

If you choose to not get your child a cell phone, then you should also teach your child that taking minutes from somebody else is also not ok. It is the same thing as saying "I am going to send my child to the mall, but if he needs some money for lunch, most kids have money, so he can just use some of theirs if he is hungry."

Your decision to not get your child a cell phone, no problem. But accept the consequences of your decision that your child might not be able to get in touch with you.

I think it pretty hypocritical to say "My kid can't have a cell phone, but in an emergency, they can just use somebody else's phone." If you think there is ever a need for your child to borrow a cell phone, it is time to get them their own.

I think it is a family's decision whether a cell phone is appropriate or not for their family. Their decision. However, the attitude that their kid can just use somebody else's phone is just wrong.

 

[Goofyluver]

When he can pay for it himself.

 

[goofy!]

Most of us on this message board grew up the same way. We didn't have pagers or cell phones when I was a kid. But, if we do things based on how our childhood was, we also shouldn't make our kids wear seat belts or helmets or use a computer for homework purposes. Technology is a great thing and this generation has embraced it. Most of my generation has embraced it too, even though we don't like to admit it. I'm know I am not still listening to 8-Tracks just because it is what I had back in the dinosaur age. Is a cell phone truly necessary for most kids? Probably not but I like the peace of mind it brings ME and the kids like the easy way they can communicate with their friends. Seems like a win-win to me.

I don't see kids texting each other as one of their methods of communicating any different than a bunch of us bored mothers spending hours on a Disney Chat board "communicating" electronically.

 

[sparks19]

My DD is only 3 1/2 so I may change my mind between now and then. but here goes....

My DD will have a cell phone when she starts going out on her own. here's the catch... the phone will only have capabilities to call home, our cell phones and an emergency contact. the phone will NOT be for social time. it will be a phone for emergency use and to get in contact with us... the parents and for us to be able to get a hold of her. there aren't many pay phones around anymore like there were when I was a kid so I think its important that she have a way to contact me.

but if she wants a cell phone for texting and calling all her friends she can have that one when she has a job to pay her portion of the bill. Until then the cell phone is for calling home ONLY.

 

[robinb]

My DD is only 3 1/2 so I may change my mind between now and then. but here goes....

My DD will have a cell phone when she starts going out on her own. here's the catch... the phone will only have capabilities to call home, our cell phones and an emergency contact. the phone will NOT be for social time. it will be a phone for emergency use and to get in contact with us... the parents and for us to be able to get a hold of her. there aren't many pay phones around anymore like there were when I was a kid so I think its important that she have a way to contact me.

but if she wants a cell phone for texting and calling all her friends she can have that one when she has a job to pay her portion of the bill. Until then the cell phone is for calling home ONLY.

Don't completely discount giving your tween a cell phone. One of the beauties of a cell phone (or ipod or game system or computer, etc) is that it can be used to gain compliance from older children. You screw up? You lose your fill-in-the-blank. If you wait until your child can earn a phone with outside jobs then you may have a missed opportunity. That kind of thing was not even on my radar when my DD was your child's age .

 

[sparks19]

Don't completely discount giving your tween a cell phone. One of the beauties of a cell phone (or ipod or game system or computer, etc) is that it can be used to gain compliance from older children. You screw up? You lose your fill-in-the-blank. If you wait until your child can earn a phone with outside jobs then you may have a missed opportunity. That kind of thing was not even on my radar when my DD was your child's age .

there are PLENTY of things in this house (already LOL) that would make a suitable "you screwed up so now you can't use this" tool

We are a very tech friendly house. computers, laptop, phones, tv, dvd player, gaming systems etc. (the only downside is we haven't consolidated remotes yet lol so we have like 4 or 5 different remotes for everything lol). so there is LOTS to be taken away when the time comes... like the ability to go OUT with friends.

yeah my DD is still young and I (hopefully) have quite a few years before I have to REALLY put this into action but there is no harm in thinking about the future and thinking about where I might stand on certain subjects She's going to grow up one day (and faster than seems possible lol) and that is always on my radar No harm in thinking about future things. I have lots of time to tweak my plans or change my mind

Then there is the opportunity to learn how to work for something and pay a bill every month that's a great lesson too

 

[The Mystery Machine]

My DD is only 3 1/2 so I may change my mind between now and then. but here goes....

My DD will have a cell phone when she starts going out on her own. here's the catch... the phone will only have capabilities to call home, our cell phones and an emergency contact. the phone will NOT be for social time. it will be a phone for emergency use and to get in contact with us... the parents and for us to be able to get a hold of her. there aren't many pay phones around anymore like there were when I was a kid so I think its important that she have a way to contact me.

but if she wants a cell phone for texting and calling all her friends she can have that one when she has a job to pay her portion of the bill. Until then the cell phone is for calling home ONLY.

By the time your dd is "of age" there will be something out there that does not even resemble what we have now.

It is cute though how you think you have this planned out though.

 

[sparks19]

By the time your dd is "of age" there will be something out there that does not even resemble what we have now.

It is cute though how you think you have this planned out though.

yeah by then we'll probably have chips inserted in our hands so we can just flip our hand open and talk lol who KNOWS what we will come up with by then

it's cute that I think about the future? you ddidn't think about the future when you had kids? am I just supposed to ignore that one day she's going to grow up? LOL I like to have some morals and rules planned to teach her. Is that wrong? does that make me silly? I already said there is lots of time for that to change and for me to change my mind but there is nothing wrong with having some BASIC idea of what I think is OK or not OK. I'm thinking more about how I'm a stay at home mom... so we live on one income. we don't have an infinite amount of money and at this point a third cell phone would just be an extra bill. There will be one so she can contact us... no matter what kind of device it is by then... she'll need to be able to call us. But we'll have a home phone (unless cell phones suddenly start offering free international calling lol) and that's sufficient enough for keeping in contact with friends To have a cell phone for "playing" she can have when she can contribute to the bill. of course like I said that is my thinking at THIS point and I know how stupid to think about things when she's young... but maybe if I make it clear all through the years that a cell phone will be a privilege that she will have to pay for then she won't be so shocked when she's 13 and asks for a personal phone and I say No

We are saving for her college education too... isn't that silly how I think we have that planned out.

I know... terrible parent lol I get railed on on other forums too for this position. like no cell phone is a crime against humanity lol

 

[Acklander]

it's cute that I think about the future? you ddidn't think about the future when you had kids? am I just supposed to ignore that one day she's going to grow up? LOL I like to have some morals and rules planned to teach her. Is that wrong? does that make me silly?

I think she just meant it's cute in the same way when you hear about someone without kids talking about how THEIR baby would never <fill in the blank>. It's easy to sit back with a 3 year old and think about how things are going to go, but once you get to the teen years you'll be laughing at how naive you were - I know I have