Am I Being Unreasonable

[patsal]

You are not being paid enough, I doubt she will find care for less than you charge...it would be at least 2x what she pays you. IF and a big IF you do not really need the $$ just enjoy having it attempt to call her bluff. I wish I had l had lived near you when my kids were little. I paid $600 per month just to have two kids cared for for 1 hour before school started, put on the bus, taken off the bus and 10 minutes after school (sometimes I even got there in time to meet the bus!). I paid regardless of them being there, plus there was the registration fee, payment even when I was home for Christmas Break, Easter Break and holidays, and a small fee for early withdrawal every year when I would pull them out for summer vacation.
As far as should you be paid or not, you should have a written contract that states that. Remember when parents need to find alternative care on short notice it makes it difficult and causes extra expenses too.

 

[sookie]

you are not getting paid enough.

 

[DISshopkeeper]

I think I would call her bluff as far as her finding 10 providers who would provide the same service for the same money. That's less than $4/hour and you are using your car, buying gas, and changing diapers. I imagine if he is autistic, he also needs one on one attention that a typical child his age would not need. And yes, I know there are kids with high functioning autism, but those do not usually need diaper changing, in my experience.

I would not expect her to pay if you cancelled. You need a written agreement if you are going to continue to do child care for a living. Also remember that you may need to up your insurance, as something could happen to the child at your house and you would be liable.

ITA with this. You are waaaaayyyyy underpaid. Do you watch the child at your house or hers? I've been doing before-school sitting for a while, it's a hard niche for a mom to fill, but it works out great for me with my regular job schedule. I get $25 a DAY for this and it's a little over an hour. And there are no diapers.

NO WAY she's got somebody in the wings for that same pay. No frikken way.

 

[tnmt]

First off, I think you are underpaid. If you are going to treat this like a business then are you going to give her a receipt so she can turn it in on her taxes and you pay taxes on the money? That is a business. I think if you call off sick then you don't get paid. If she gets someone else to watch him then she has to pay them and they get your share for that day.

 

[stitchlovestink]

I think I would call her bluff as far as her finding 10 providers who would provide the same service for the same money. That's less than $4/hour and you are using your car, buying gas, and changing diapers. I imagine if he is autistic, he also needs one on one attention that a typical child his age would not need. And yes, I know there are kids with high functioning autism, but those do not usually need diaper changing, in my experience.

I would not expect her to pay if you cancelled. You need a written agreement if you are going to continue to do child care for a living. Also remember that you may need to up your insurance, as something could happen to the child at your house and you would be liable.

Bolding is mine....
I agree, call her bluff. I doubt she'll find ONE other provider for that price. At least a safe quality provider.
And lesson learned, you need to put this is writing. I don't see a problem with you getting paid sick days but you need to have it in writing before hand. MANY hourly employees get paid sick time. And daycare centers close around here when it snows very bad and even if you have to go to work (say you work in a hospital) but you still pay the full weeks rate. so sorry so sad too bad. that's just the way it goes.... BUT, it all needs to be spelled out it WRITING!

I agree with her about not paying you if you didn't watch her child. Your comment about being a professional and, thus, deserving 5 sick days is only a valid comparison for salaried employees. If I'm paid hourly and I call in sick for a shift, I don't get paid for that shift. She clearly sees you as an hourly employee (or, at least, in that class).
I'm also not sure about the people suggesting that you "call her bluff". What bluff? Are you trying to increase your rates? Are you willing to lose the $75/week? Not that I disagree what $75 seems cheap or that the likelihood of her really finding 10 centres is slim, I'm not sure what bluff they are suggesting you call.

Bolding is mine...
I have no idea what you mean by that kind of comment! Just because someone is an hourly employee doesn't make them any less professional at their job. My DH is an hourly employee and every company he has worked for (many national companies and his current employer is global) offer him paid sick time. Actually he gets the equivalent of 20 paid sick days per calendar year. Now if they use them every year, the company will start to review their employment records. They give them this many days because they want to keep them from going on S/T disability since the company self insures. It's complicated to try and explain but I understand how/why they do it because we had to use their system this past summer when DH had a medical emergency. But the above statement was really rather rude IMO. Like unless you are a salaried employee you are not worthy of being paid sick time.

 

[sookie]

Like the others have said - you should totally call her bluff, especially if she is being a jerk about this.
I'd love to see how quickly she can find another daycare provider to tote her diaper wearing kid around... you could triple your rate and be well within your means to do so!!

 

[LMC]

You don't charge enough. I have a high school aged child on the autism spectrum and I paid someone $10 per hour to pick him up from school, drive him to my home, and sit here for 3 hours per day until I got home from work. He does not need a diaper change. I also paid her gas money. Her time came out to about 4 hours per day because I DID pay her travel time from her home to his school to get him. If she did not work on a given day, she did not get paid for that day. Some days she had something to do and had to cancel (with notice) or sometimes we had doctors or such and we cancelled (with notice).

 

[crashbb]

Bolding is mine...
I have no idea what you mean by that kind of comment! Just because someone is an hourly employee doesn't make them any less professional at their job. My DH is an hourly employee and every company he has worked for (many national companies and his current employer is global) offer him paid sick time. Actually he gets the equivalent of 20 paid sick days per calendar year. Now if they use them every year, the company will start to review their employment records. They give them this many days because they want to keep them from going on S/T disability since the company self insures. It's complicated to try and explain but I understand how/why they do it because we had to use their system this past summer when DH had a medical emergency. But the above statement was really rather rude IMO. Like unless you are a salaried employee you are not worthy of being paid sick time.

I never said it made them less of a professional. I work (as a second job) as an hourly employee and I do not get paid sick time. Has nothing to so with not being worthy, it has to do with how it works. I either work my shift or I don't get paid. Most people I know who work as hourly employees are the same. Actually, everyone hourly employee I know (where I know the details) is the same.

You read far more into my statement than was meant.

 

[Maddies Mama]

If you don't have a contract that states you get your own sick days paid for, I don't think you should be paid for the day you called off sick. She still has to find a last minute sitter and pay them or take the day off from work possibly without pay herself if she can't find anyone.

On the flip side though, I do think that if it were the other way around and her son were sick and stayed home that you should be paid.

 

[eroilersgal]

If child care is your business then not only do you need a SIGNED contract prior to accepting a child for care, but there is a pile of other rules and regualations regarding insurance, transporting the daycare child in your vehicle, etc. If you are licensed or registered as your state requires, they should have a handbook of guidelines as a reference.

As for a paid sick day, I didn't charge for my sick days but most parents still paid their weekly rate as I typically averaged 1-2 days per year (over a 12 year span of business).

 

[Arabelle]

What a terrible woman. I'd ditch her, and then set up as a contract based business. When I paid a sitter, though, if I cancelled, I paid. If she cancelled I didn't, because I still had to pay childcare elsewhere.

 

[NLD]

My first thought is you're not getting paid enough money.

My second thought is that I would not expect to be paid if you didn't provide the service unless it is spelled out in some kind of contract.

Another "ditto" to this!

As for paid sick days: 5 paid sick days for a part-time shift type job, around here, is NOT the norm.

 

[sherry7]

In regards to the overall pay issue, $75 for 20 hours may or may not be the average in your area, even for a special needs child. In my experience, daycare/babysitting rates vary widely depending on the part of the country you're in. For example, I pay $145 a week for my toddler's full-time daycare (50-52 hours per week), but in NYC, etc it would be at least double that.

No, I don't think you should expect to be paid for that day. It was your decision to tell the mother that she couldn't bring her child, and she likely had to pay another person to watch him.

 

[polkadotminnie]

I think I would call her bluff as far as her finding 10 providers who would provide the same service for the same money. That's less than $4/hour and you are using your car, buying gas, and changing diapers. I imagine if he is autistic, he also needs one on one attention that a typical child his age would not need. And yes, I know there are kids with high functioning autism, but those do not usually need diaper changing, in my experience.

I would not expect her to pay if you cancelled. You need a written agreement if you are going to continue to do child care for a living. Also remember that you may need to up your insurance, as something could happen to the child at your house and you would be liable.

I agree 100%. She should be paying you more.

 

[kelldawn]

Seriously get that contract signed and copy of her ID. THEN GET THAT CAMERA.. She is going to pull something and you will be in a world of hurt. How old is this child??? Regardless protect yourself friends or o friends. Oh how about gas money if we are going to be picky about all this..

 

[lisalis]

I agree with the part about the contract. Since you do not currently work under a contract, she is in the right about not paying for days you could not watch her son. It sounds like you need to have a talk about future expectations and put it in writing. Let her shop around. You are not being paid that much for a special needs child. That being said; every day care provider I have used always has a yearly contract with the rate, drop off and pick up hour expectations, and vacation/sick day expectations.

I have had two different experiences. One care provider asked for 10 days paid vacation days throughout the year. This was sometimes Winter break & spring break, as I am a teacher; but other times they took a family vacation. My other provider did not expect to be paid for days she took off. Good luck to you

 

[peanutsmommy10]

Thank you all for your advice. I need to clarify a few things. I did have an agreement I gave her about a month ago. It stated my policy for pay, vacation, and actually sick days. I thought it had not. I put in there I get paid for sick days, regardless. She has a copy of this. I really don't even care about being paid or not for day my kids were sick. Its more the fact that she takes me for granted and expects people to bend over backwards and be flexible with her and gets an attitude if they don't she hates her sons school. Always complains about them. I actually did tell her I was raising the rates to $100 per week effective mon. I sent it home with her son. He is 6 btw. She told me he was potty trained almost and never mentioned changing his diapers originally. She said he was an easy child. He is not. He does need one on one care and he has broken 2 baby gates and damaged a wall throwing toys. Just this morning he broke my sons new Christmas toy. I have never asked his mother for the money. I never heard back from her about my contract, letter and changes. What am I to say if he just shows up tomorrow. How would you guys handle it? And kelldawn wow! I am so sorry for your dd. that is so wrong and scary. I really want to quit as she does seem the type to pull something like that

 

[Maddies Mama]

Thank you all for your advice. I need to clarify a few things. I did have an agreement I gave her about a month ago. It stated my policy for pay, vacation, and actually sick days. I thought it had not. I put in there I get paid for sick days, regardless. She has a copy of this. I really don't even care about being paid or not for day my kids were sick. Its more the fact that she takes me for granted and expects people to bend over backwards and be flexible with her and gets an attitude if they don't she hates her sons school. Always complains about them. I actually did tell her I was raising the rates to $100 per week effective mon. I sent it home with her son. He is 6 btw. She told me he was potty trained almost and never mentioned changing his diapers originally. She said he was an easy child. He is not. He does need one on one care and he has broken 2 baby gates and damaged a wall throwing toys. Just this morning he broke my sons new Christmas toy. I have never asked his mother for the money. I never heard back from her about my contract, letter and changes. What am I to say if he just shows up tomorrow. How would you guys handle it? And kelldawn wow! I am so sorry for your dd. that is so wrong and scary. I really want to quit as she does seem the type to pull something like that

She needs to abide by whatever the contract says. If it says you get paid for sick days and she signed off on it, thus agreeing to it, then you are owed for your day. As far as the other issues, you may want to suggest to her that she find another provider. It sounds like you're being taken for a ride.

 

[luvthemouse71]

I think $75 for what you do for this mom and child is not enough. It wouldn't be enough for a child without issues, never mind one that needs more care. She is taking advantage of you from that angle.I also agree with a PP that you need to make her sign a contract or else not watch the child. There's liability in watching others children. A contract would protect you and her.

I have a family member that does in home childcare ( licensed by the state) and she has days off and sick days in her contract.

Update..I saw that you do have a written agreement. In that case, get rid of her as a client. What a witch..

 

["Ginger"]

No longer in the business, thank the lord.
First of all did she sign the new contract with you? If not then she is not excepting it and has no respect for you, not good, she has the control or she thinks she does.
You need the control, it's your business. So if she shows up without the new rate of pay and without the contract signed then do not except her child for daycare.
You should charge her for the damages to your home and your childrens toys. That should have been in your contract.

Never say you don't care if she doesn't pays you for the sick days, you do care or you would not be on here telling us your story.

BTW I got 5 paid sick days and 7 paid vacation days, any damages to my home or childs toys were either repaired, replaced, or paid cash for.
I did hold a license with the State of Maryland, I was paid for the food my daycare children ate by the state and we ate good. I was educated by the state, I also took classes on my own. I got every tax deduction I could get.

Stand strong and take control of your business.