Adoption Questions

[speairson]

My son is adopted from Korea. We got him when he was 11 months and he's almost 5 now. We also have a daughter who just turned 4 that is our bio kid. I agree that the adoption journey can be very overwhelming, but your heart will lead you in the right direction. One site I found very helpful in our journey was loving shepherd ministries. They're a non profit that can take your information and let you know what programs may or may not work for you. They'll also investigate agencies you are considering to make sure they're legit (this saved us potentially thousands of dollars). And the best part is their services are free (or at least they were when we used them). I don't have enough posts to add the link, but you can google loving shepherd ministries and then click on adoption information. Good luck!

 

[mkymouse1928]

I'm touched your thinking of others and wanting to adopt!
Were you able to have your own children?..
Do you have a specific age of adoption?
--sorry for being sort of nosey lol.
I wish you the best of luck.

While my husband and I have not been successful in getting pregnant, adoption is something that has always been on the table, regardless of if we have a biological child or not. It is something that I feel very strongly drawn towards. In my heart, I hear God telling me at least one of my children is come through adoption. I simply cannot ignore that!


Thank you again to everyone with your words of support and advice. Things are a little clearer now!

 

[QueueCT]

I a family adopts from another country will that child be a US citizen automaticly? I ask because a lady in our area has moved back from Brazil with her husband and they had adopted 3children from Brazil. Someone stated that they will be working on trying to get citizenship. It just a question.

It depends on the country that the child is adopted from and other specifics of the adoption. For example, we adopted from China and, since my spouse and I traveled, the girls became citizens when we arrived in the States. If only one of us traveled then they would not have been citizens upon arrival.

I don't know the details for each country, it depends on the type of visa the child travels on: IR-3 or IR-4.

 

[crisi]

I a family adopts from another country will that child be a US citizen automaticly? I ask because a lady in our area has moved back from Brazil with her husband and they had adopted 3children from Brazil. Someone stated that they will be working on trying to get citizenship. It just a question.

Generally yes, its automatic - my son was one of the last children who needed to be naturalized - he is ten (the law hadn't passed yet, we could have waited and it would have been automatic) - but in your friends case she should check because she is was a resident of Brazil when they adopted and I don't think that citizenship is automatic.

 

[crisi]

This is some good advice. I'd also recommend that you think about how comfortable you are with open vs. closed adoptions. That will further serve to narrow things down.

That's a good one.

Another one is how long are you willing to wait and how much uncertainty you are willing to put up with....some programs have long waits. Some have no guarantees you'll ever get matched......and sometimes you can have a child home fairly quickly.

 

[Mason7AK]

Hi, Just wanted to wish you luck in your adoption journey!
I am mom to five wonderful adopted kiddos! In your search, don't forget to check into special needs adoption as well. There are many, many babies born with medical issues that desperately need loving homes. My three youngest are all special needs (one with Cerebral Palsy, one with Spina Bifida and one with hearing loss). I was able to bring all three of these little ones home within a month of their birth. My older two were "healthy" newborns and we waited quite a while for each of them. Once we adopted our DD8 (CP) we never had to apply to adopt again - the agency called US on the other two! That is how badly they need families for special needs children.
Anyway, good luck - there are lots of options out there!
Angela

 

[Vijoge]

If there is a Lutheran Social Service agency in your area I encourage you to contact them. I adopted three children throught Lutheran Child and Family Services of IL and they were the most wonderful people to work with, (Unfortunately, the same could not be said of our state DCFS.)

 

[lorac4disney]

I have no advice. I just know how hard adoption can be. DH and I have considered many options and spent a small fortune looking to adopt. It's a tough road. Hang in there.

 

[kelma]

I'm touched your thinking of others and wanting to adopt!
Were you able to have your own children?..
Do you have a specific age of adoption?
--sorry for being sort of nosey lol.
I wish you the best of luck.

My dh and I have 4 wonderful children - 2 bio and 2 adopted - and they are all "our own"

 

[Aliceacc]

Hi!

We celebrated my son's 10th "Gotcha Day" 2 weeks ago-- a celebration of the day he arrived into our home.

He was adopted from Korea.

If you're thinking international, there are a bunch of additional variables to consider-- all of which helped us decide on Korea:
- Do you have to travel or will the baby come to you. (Korea will do it either way.)
- Where are the babies before the adoption goes through? The Korean agency that our agency worked through had the babies in foster homes. As a result, Brian was incredibly well socialized when he arrived; he was used to being part of a family, to being held, to going to the store and being out and about.
-What is the cost of the program?
- What's the the typical timeline?
- How old are the babies from that program?
- If it matters to you, can you request a particular gender?

If you're thinking international, I suggest you take a look at our agency's website: www.new-beginnings.org

While they may not be licensed in your state, they have a great rundown on the requirements for each of the programs they work with.

It's incredibly important to work with a reputable agency. Every single penny we spent was accounted for. It was requested at pre-determined points in the process, with a good amount due at the very end.

For us, the process took 11 months from the time we contacted New Beginnings until Brian was placed in our arms at JFK.

Please feel free to PM me with any questions. I could rave about adoption for hours.

Oh, and for the record: all 3 of my kids, adopted or biological, are "mine" as well
OOPs, one more thing on the citizenship question:

Just about 10 years ago, shortly after Brian arrived, the law changed. From that point onward, any minor child became a citizen as soon as the adoption became finalized. For us, that meant 6 months after Brian's arrival from Korea. But there is no longer a need for a separate citizenship procedure.

Here's the info:
http://international.adoption.com/foreign/citizenship-for-your-internationally-adopted-child.html

 

[jcoffman]

I am crying because it is so touching to hear of all these adoption stories here on dis forums. Adoption is a journey in faith. Follow your heart and your family will be complete.

Mom to 2 angels in heaven, and 2 beautiful children here on earth through the magic of adoption.

See disney doesn't have all the magic.

Jenn

 

[crisi]

I think Korea is making you travel now (at least, our agency is), and the babies are older than when you and I adopted (which is about the same time, our son was a March 99 Korea arrival).

 

[luvsmickeymouse]

My oldest son, was adopted from South Korea at age 1 he is 21 now. My youngest son was adopted from The Phillipines at 11 months, he is 18 now. Both are special needs. They were born with a cleft lip and palate. They have done well, both in college now. And they are gorgeous! They have had 21 operations between them both. I still can't believe how blessed I am. I am so lucky.

 

[Aliceacc]

I think Korea is making you travel now (at least, our agency is), and the babies are older than when you and I adopted (which is about the same time, our son was a March 99 Korea arrival).

I just checked the website for New Beginnings. Unless they somehow forgot to update the website, they're still escorting the kids over:

" If you qualify for the Korean program you will be matched with a child up to one year, with a thorough medical report and pictures, as well as social history on the birthmother. Twenty to twenty-four weeks after the assignment is accepted, the child will be escorted to a New York Airport and placed in your arms. "

 

[jcoffman]

We used New beginnings also. Did you?

Jennifer

 

[Aliceacc]

Yes, and I can't speak highly enough of them.

EVERY single thing they talked about was right on topic: the costs, the timing, everything.

They even warned us about the possibility that immigration quotas might close up at the end of the year and delay travel. Sure enough, in November of 1998, they closed travel for the year. It was the pits, having to wait until January for Brian to travel, but we knew it was a strong possibility-- New Beginnings knew enough to expect it.

I would strongly, STRONGLY recommend them to any one considering international adoption in any of the states in which they're licensed.

 

[Wendyloo]

We have adopted internationally once already and we are still hanging out in line for our second adoption, which we started before the first adoption. (Guatemala is the country where our son is from. China is the country that we are still waiting in line for.)
Adoption is not for the faint of heart. If you are type A like me, you have to give up alot of your "control". It is one heck of a journey, but there is nothing like going into my little boy's room every morning and seeing his big smile!
Best wishes in your journey!
Wendy

 

[DawnM]

All I can tell you is that I was confused from the day we said we were going to adopt until the day the last paper was signed, long after the adoption. I am not kidding....I could go into a long saga about one commedy of errors after another in our process, but I won't bore you with the details.

We had to learn to just go with it as it came and deal with it as it came. I felt like I called my adoption agency over and over again and got different answers each time I called! ARGH!

But we had a great little guy from China and it was well worth it.

Dawn