8 roommates:(an extra roommate) - how to fix?

[BadDad]

My CP son is in an 4 bedroom. One of his apartment mate's girlfriend is there all the time even over night. She lives in the same complex.

The issue is that she is running the apt (but not cleaning it so there is no benefit )

How to confidentiality get rid of her?

Second question. There is a battle of the thermostat. Is 65 AC too low? My S prefers it warmer, like 70. I've lived and worked in other places and there has been rules set on temp ranges>

 

[beckysmith]

Now I haven't done the Disney CP yet, so I don't know exactly how the rules go there and how they would handle situations, but a friend of mine is in the exact same predicament at his college (minus the thermostat).

According to him, if they reported the girlfriend for staying there (at this college, anyway) they would all get in trouble for not reporting her sooner. So I can imagine that Disney, being more strict, would probably do the same.

Unless everyone wants to get in trouble, this is probably something the roommates will all have to confront the guy and his girlfriend about.
Best of luck to him!

Though I don't know what that girl is thinking anyway!
I sure know I wouldn't want to live with eight guys!!

 

[slp1650]

My freshman year I had a roommate who's boyfriend would come visit every weekend. While he wasn't there everyday, it still made it miserable for myself and our other roommate and the 3 girls in our suite. It was mainly bad for me because they slept above me (we got the bunk... lucky us) and the boyfriend was at least 250 lbs... scary much?

Now my roommate eventually dropped out of school and left so that is how my problem was solved. However, no one I know would get in trouble for reporting an extra person, or waiting to report the extra person. In fact, we were on the verge of reporting it because we could have someone over only so many times a month and they repeatedly violated this rule.

The problem I see you getting into is the fact she lives in the same complex. So they're not violating the over-night visitor rule that the CP complexes have. Still, if she's still an issue, I would try and talk to someone about it. Maybe talk to them first and if nothing happens, go to the managers.

As for the thermostat... they need to talk it out and compromise or find some sort of solution. There's not much that I see outside people helping with there...

Good luck to your son and hope things work out!

 

[indianabrit]

My CP son is in an 4 bedroom. One of his apartment mate's girlfriend is there all the time even over night. She lives in the same complex.

The issue is that she is running the apt (but not cleaning it so there is no benefit )

How to confidentiality get rid of her?

Second question. There is a battle of the thermostat. Is 65 AC too low? My S prefers it warmer, like 70. I've lived and worked in other places and there has been rules set on temp ranges>

You should tell your son and the other roommates talk to him. You can tell him to use buddy tactics All guys need a little "bro time".

If that doesn't work and the problem persists....

(someone mentioned the problem being that she lives in the same building)

At my school's dorms if we don't feel comfortable with someone of the opposite sex staying over all of the time we reserve the right to report it.

About the a/c. It's their apartment. If she wants her a/c at 65 then she can go to her own apartment.

 

[jlg263]

Ugh, I hate those kinds of situations. I understand that couples want to be together and all, but when you're living in such a cramped environment to begin with it's just not fair to everyone else in the apartment. On my first CP we had a guy stay over in our 4-bedroom every night and he would sleep on the couch. It made it miserable for all of us because the living room was no longer ours! Forget about watching a movie or making a midnight snack in peace! Instead you had to worry about waking the free-loader up! The only up-side to my situation was that the guy wasn't even a CP! So we got fed up and called security on him

But yes, your son's situation is a little different. Since she lives in the same complex she can pretty much be there as much as she wants (as long as someone lets her into the apartment, of course). So, the only method of removal would probably be an awkward conversation with the roommate. Maybe even get all the other roommates together and have an intervention? Then if the roommate doesn't comply I would take the issue to security. Even though she can technically be there, if it's a problem for everyone else living in the apartment then I'm sure security would arrange a meeting to help everyone work it out.

I feel bad for whoever is sharing a room with them! Those rooms are barely big enough for 2 people, let alone 3! And then you have the uncomfortable situation of having someone of the opposite sex in your room at all times.

 

[jlg263]

Oh! And I forgot about the air conditioning issue.

In the housing meeting they tell us to not set it below a certain temperature because the AC unit could freeze up. I just looked it up in my old College Program Guide and this is the quote from it:

" When you are running the A/C you should set the temperature at no less than 70 degrees. Anything below 70, may cause your unit to freeze over and make it non-functional for a day or two. Anywhere between 70-75 degrees is usually considered ideal for our mostly warm climate." And then it goes on to say you should set it to "auto" and not "on."

So, maybe that information will back up your son's point This was from a few years ago (2007 and 2009) but i imagine the air conditioning systems haven't been majorly upgraded since then, haha. It also recommends a "secret ballot" if the roommates can't agree on a temperature.

 

[autie689]

My CP son is in an 4 bedroom. One of his apartment mate's girlfriend is there all the time even over night. She lives in the same complex.

The issue is that she is running the apt (but not cleaning it so there is no benefit )

How to confidentiality get rid of her?

Second question. There is a battle of the thermostat. Is 65 AC too low? My S prefers it warmer, like 70. I've lived and worked in other places and there has been rules set on temp ranges>

Sounds like no matter how they approach the dreaded conversation, the guy will probably be upset because it seems that him and his girlfriend are close. But they do need to try to work it out themselves first by talking to him. Try having an apartment meeting to talk about issues. Or plan an outing with all of the roommates and casually bring it up. I personally wouldn't make it a casual situation. Although having an apartment meeting may make the said roommate feel attacked in some way, you don't want him to not take the other roommates seriously. You could bring up the temp problem in a meeting as well.

If none of that works, or if the roommate goes crazy and ignores them, then you can get housing involved. You can set up a housing meeting, where a CP rep will act as a mediator for the roommates and they can talk about all of the issues. If the issue can't be resolved, then they can arrange for a roommate to move if needed.

Hope this helps.

 

[Nola Girl]

Bad Dad-
I am not sure how it was done but a "friend" of my DD was just asked to leave her apartment by her roommates for having her boyfriend sleepover most nights. I am pretty sure it involved a housing meeting. I know they can all get in trouble if security catches it and they have not reported it. It is not worth the risk. Another "friend" (she has only just met these girls if you know what I mean) was terminated for sneaking her boyfriend past security in the trunk of her car! The girls swear that no one told, she was caught by security cameras in the parking lot!? I believe it--those security guards are itching to find a violation!

 

[autie689]

Bad Dad-
I am not sure how it was done but a "friend" of my DD was just asked to leave her apartment by her roommates for having her boyfriend sleepover most nights. I am pretty sure it involved a housing meeting. I know they can all get in trouble if security catches it and they have not reported it. It is not worth the risk. Another "friend" (she has only just met these girls if you know what I mean) was terminated for sneaking her boyfriend past security in the trunk of her car! The girls swear that no one told, she was caught by security cameras in the parking lot!? I believe it--those security guards are itching to find a violation!

They can't get in trouble for having someone sleep over, even if security sees it. If that person sleeping over lives in the same complex as them, it's fine regardless of gender. The only reason they would get in trouble for not reporting someone sleeping over is if they DON'T live in that complex. And yes, they have to have a housing meeting before someone can get kicked out. The roommates themselves can't kick someone out.

 

[Nola Girl]

I am sorry but I just placed a call to my DD who is living in Chatham right now and she assures me they are most certainly not allowed to have overnight guests ESPECIALLY of the opposite gender. Can they get away with it if the person resides in the same apartment complex--YES--is it allowed---NO! Would she tolerate it from a roomie--Maybe---If the guest turned the AC to 65 degrees--NEVER--NO WAY!!

 

[WDW_lover_in_SC]

I am sorry but I just placed a call to my DD who is living in Chatham right now and she assures me they are most certainly not allowed to have overnight guests ESPECIALLY of the opposite gender. Can they get away with it if the person resides in the same apartment complex--YES--is it allowed---NO! Would she tolerate it from a roomie--Maybe---If the guest turned the AC to 65 degrees--NEVER--NO WAY!!

She doesn't understand the rules then. They can't have over night guests who aren't living in the same apartment complex. But anyone who lives in say Chatham for an example can still with anyone in Catham at anytime. Unless someone complains in which they might as you to stop but won't enforce it until it gets out of hand.

People from any of the other apartments or just people in general who aren't residence of Chatham can't stay over night. So as long as the girl is a resident of the same complex there are no rules being broken. Just no courtesy from the 2 people.

 

[jlg263]

Yeah, you can totally have overnight visitors as long as they're in your complex. Regardless of what sex they are. For instance, if you wanted to have a sleepover with other people from your complex: allowed. Now, if it becomes a problem, that's a different story.

It's kinda like playing your guitar. You can play your guitar all you want when on the program. But if it gets to the point where it's disrupting the people you live with...then it's a problem. It's allowed, but everything has its limits.

 

[autie689]

She doesn't understand the rules then. They can't have over night guests who aren't living in the same apartment complex. But anyone who lives in say Chatham for an example can still with anyone in Catham at anytime. Unless someone complains in which they might as you to stop but won't enforce it until it gets out of hand.

People from any of the other apartments or just people in general who aren't residence of Chatham can't stay over night. So as long as the girl is a resident of the same complex there are no rules being broken. Just no courtesy from the 2 people.

Exactly. Here is the reason why it IS allowed. If someone lives in Chatham, then they don't have a curfew in Chatham. Security can't monitor whether someone is sleeping at a friends apartment, or merely staying up till 6AM. Since someone who lives in Chatham is allowed anywhere inside of Chatham at any hour, then they aren't breaking the rules by staying the night in another apartment IN Chatham.

Like the person above said. People of OTHER complexes can't stay the night, but someone in the same complex can. Sorry, but your information is wrong. I'm trying to be helpful, since I've actually done the program and have been in that situation before. So, I would think that my information is reliable.

 

[taythegibs]

Exactly. Here is the reason why it IS allowed. If someone lives in Chatham, then they don't have a curfew in Chatham. Security can't monitor whether someone is sleeping at a friends apartment, or merely staying up till 6AM. Since someone who lives in Chatham is allowed anywhere inside of Chatham at any hour, then they aren't breaking the rules by staying the night in another apartment IN Chatham.

Like the person above said. People of OTHER complexes can't stay the night, but someone in the same complex can. Sorry, but your information is wrong. I'm trying to be helpful, since I've actually done the program and have been in that situation before. So, I would think that my information is reliable.

This^ i am currently on a cp and living in patterson, Unlike the op's-sons-roommate i asked my roomies if they minded my girlfriend coming over before she started "sleeping over" with the ac thing if they cant resolve it then there is always the option of mediation with price management but my advice to the op, dont get involved. in my last apartment my one roommates grandma like to get involved in out apartment stuff....he didnt last too long.

 

[disdude89]

wowza! Hope everything works out!

 

[sleezy18]

Eh, going behind the kid and his girlfriend's back and reporting them without actually talking to them about the problem seems kind of passive-aggressive and downright undisneyish to me. Part of the CP seems to be learning how to deal with real life problems and "tattling" on people without trying to work it out first isn't going to make your son seem like the best person to be around anyway and will probably end up making him look like the "bad guy" to anyone involved.

I guess what im saying is your son is turning into an adult and needs to figure this out for himself because a bunch of strangers on the internet probably don't know what's best for either party. I think telling on the kid is only going to make him enemies and who needs those?

Hope everything works out!

I agree i had worst roommate problems at school my freshmen year and i learned how to deal with it myself. He needs to be mature about it and figure it out himself.

 

[BadDad]

If you ever worked in a restaurant, think what a restuarant refrig smells and feels like (that was his apt)

He turned 21 recently, requested a non-wellness. Found a 1 bedroom in Chatham and moved out.

New roommate is neat and keeps the AC at 70.

Being mature is nice advice but most 18 y.o. are not mature (even though they think they are).

 

[indianabrit]

Being mature is nice advice but most 18 y.o. are not mature (even though they think they are).

Ain't that the truth.

I'm nearly 21 and I'm rooming with an 18 year old. I'm feeling the mileage.