What's your Threshold for Taking Kids out of School

msmama · Oct 7, 2015

I'm going to say it depends on the teacher, too.

I had no issues taking my son out for a week in K and 1st grade. He's in 2nd now and I'm taking him out for 2 days in November and I'm a little nervous about it - though I know he will be absolutely fine.

OP, you don't have any other breaks you can piggy back off of? For instance we're taking off 2 days around Veterans day (which is a Wednesday) so we get 5 (4 1/2 really I guess) days of vacation with only missing 2 days of school.

Dina · Oct 7, 2015

Someone mentioned that education is more important than low crowds, but not everyone can get a week vacation in the summer. . The first two years I worked as a nurse in the hospital system I am in....I was at the very bottom of the totem poll and my summer vacation request was denied. I could only get an October week. I think a family needs vacation time, and I did pull my 6th and 4th graders out. I think that many other families have this issue these days. i was a hs social studies teacher before changing careers to nursing, and I taught 9th grade and had quite a few kids miss a week for Disney in the 6 years I taught.....I don't remember any have any real trouble when they returned. 9th grade is my limith though....I would never do junior or senior year. Too important

Now....that' not my excuse. This trip. This was my decision..I have the oldest children in a large family and everyone wanted to take a trip as a family and refused summer (we are the only ones that go in the summer)....so I made the decision to pull them out because I think this one experience will be worth the missed 9th grade work. I had one trip as a kid with my entire extended family and I will remember that trip forever.

Nancyg56 · Oct 7, 2015

Dina said:
Someone mentioned that education is more important than low crowds, but not everyone can get a week vacation in the summer. . The first two years I worked as a nurse in the hospital system I was in....I was at the very bottom of the totem poll and my summer vacation request was denied. I could only get an October week. I think a family needs vacation time, and I did pull my 6th and 4th graders out. I think that many other families have this issue these days. i was a hs social studies teacher before changing careers to nursing, and I taught 9th grade and had quite a few kids miss a week for Disney in the 6 years I taught.....I don't remember any have any real trouble when they returned. 9th grade is my limith though....I would never do junior or senior year. Too important

Now....that' not my excuse. This trip. This was my decision..I have the oldest children in a large family and everyone wanted to take a trip as a family and refused summer (we are the only ones that go in the summer)....so I made the decision to pull them out because I think this one experience will be worth the missed 9th grade work. I had one trip as a kid with my entire extended family and I will remember that trip forever.

I agree. Unless you work in a job that limits the time when you can take a vacation, you really have no idea how stressful these decisions are, or how difficult it is to plan trips as a family. My DD had to listen to a lot of negative feedback for people whose positions either had enough seniority to vacation during "conventional" weeks. Even though the school and the teachers were supportive, there were those others who felt the need to criticize, My DSIL worked nights, never had the opportunity to take a "normal" vacation off. His schedule included Easter, Christmas Eve, every Saturday, and NYE. He got the unpopular weeks to choose from. My DD insisted that since her schedule was flexible they take a trip when they all could go, and they removed Kady from school. Thank goodness! because those days are gone, and my DGD would never survive a week off now.

My DD said that her family absolutely needed that time together, and while it was easy for others to judge, they had no idea what that was like while my DSIL "paid his dues" at work. Some of those same people are young parents now, and they are faced with those same decisions and choices. It's aways "different" for them.

I think that as parents we need to recognize that not everyone can follow the plan we have in place and that is okay.

alc571 · Oct 7, 2015

We just returned from a week at WDW, and pulled our son (grade 5) out for 6 days of school. His teachers were fine with it, and he reported that after being back 5 days he's already working ahead of the other kids - which is amazing considering he has a learning disability. I have no problems taking him out of school for Disney. He will miss another 6 days in June when we return again, and another 5 days next fall. I try to make sure our trips are less likely to interfere with their teachings - early September before things get going, and in June after report cards are already written. We make sure he won't miss provincial testing or anything like that. We will continue to take him out of school until at least high school. He's a very anxious kid.. and the only time he's truly at peace is on vacation. We all benefit from it.

robinb · Oct 7, 2015

Dina said:
Someone mentioned that education is more important than low crowds, but not everyone can get a week vacation in the summer.

That was me. I was responding to he OP who specifically mentioned crowds and weather as her reason for wanting to take her kids out of school:

Frozen2014 said:
I'm ok taking them out as family time is precious, but DH feels that he's getting too old...and i respect that. Only thing is it means our next trip will be either March Break, summer or Christmas. yikes...not the best time to come in terms of crowds or weather.

I stand by my comment. If you're pulling your kids out because you can't get traditional school vacation time off of work that's one thing. If you're pulling them out because the crowds are lower at a certain time and and you don't want to stand in line or pay higher prices ... I believe that a child's education is more important than convenience.

Baklava · Oct 7, 2015

We homeschool, which relieves most of this with our kids, but once the teen started taking classes at the local college (11th grade) we started making that a timing factor. He's now in a place where the work he misses can't be made up and is actually valuable stuff we have chosen for him to learn. For me that's the general litmus- will the kid miss serious educational opportunities or just busy work?

awalker1015 · Oct 7, 2015

Never done it before but we are next September. DD will be in 6th and DS in 4th. I've already talked to the schools and will communicate with the teachers closer to the time. Both schools are happy to work with us. My oldest will have the opportunity to work ahead the week's before. Is it ideal? No. But my kids are at different schools with different breaks so we are making this work for our family.

hisgal2 · Oct 7, 2015

This is going to be different for every family. Personally, I'm ok with taking my kids out of school for a week. Our district is fine with it also. They have what is called a 'family excursion form' that needs to be filled out for each child and the teachers are really good with working with the parents to get the school work that is going to be missed together. If we are going to take the kids out of school, we try to be strategic with our timing. The first couple weeks of school is mostly just review and they do quite a bit of review in January after the holiday break, so those are the times we plan for if we are going to do it.

I do agree with a PP in that family time isn't just a vacation. I am always home when the kids are at home. My husband is a corrections officer and works alot of overtime hours, but always schedules time off when the kids have sporting events or a single day off here and there (for example, he has taken Columbus day off since the kids will be home). However, we want to be able to give our kids different experiences and sometimes for us to do that, we have to take the kids out of school.

So, what I'm saying is to do what is right for your family. You'll know when it's time to stop taking them out of school for trips.

Disney Khaleesi · Oct 7, 2015

Depends on your kid and what grade they're in. I've always been a good student, so if I were taken out in middle or elementary school, it would have been fine. However, I have a very heavy course load in HS and it's a beast to complete make-up work. I once missed four days of school due to illness and it quite literally took me a month to catch up on everything. If your child is a good student and you feel they can handle it, go for it. However I wouldn't do it if they struggle or are in high school.

cmarsh31 · Oct 7, 2015

Did it last year (1st & 4th - no issue, in fact the 4th grade teacher's mother worked AT WDW for her retirement job - teacher even met up with another family at WDW over the summer while they were all there!). We did some work over vacation and DS (4th) ended up being ahead of where his class was when he got home. Since it was the end of Sept, not a whole lot was going on for DD in 1st grade - reading assessments, etc and she was already doing fine. I'd definitely factor in the personality and abilities of your child from about 4th+ but I won't be pulling mine out for more than a couple days after 5th grade.

librarymom2007 · Oct 7, 2015

We pulled DD out in kindergarten and that was ok but In first grade she missed 4 days due to illness and getting her to do the makeup work was hellish. She is in 3rd grade now and while I wanted to pull her out for a trip next year my gut is telling me no. It's just not fair to her. We don't get fall break or anything so we are in your same boat. A day here and a day there off but no big chunks. Summer (too hot, we did that this past August) Easter and Christmas (way too crowded) and Thanksgiving is all that's left. We have decided to go over thanksgiving. She will only miss 1.5 days that week.

wondermama16 · Oct 7, 2015

I'm a teacher so I am limited by when I can vacation. Unfortunately, my summer break, spring break, and winter break don't match up with my son's. We're planning to take him out the last week of school for a WDW trip May 2016. I am sure it will be just fine.

As a teacher, I wouldn't pass judgement on a family who coordinates a family vacation with the schools. If I can support the child by offering make-up work or independent work, I am always happy to do so.

kmb584 · Oct 8, 2015

I take my daughter out for 5 days in November and pushed our annual spring trip from April/May to June to avoid taking her out a second time. She's in 1st grade right now, and while I'm not sure as to when I'll stop the fall trip, I'm thinking it will be middle or high school.

sharona · Oct 8, 2015

K-5 I didn't hesitate to have DD miss up to a week and never felt like making up the work was stressful for her. In Middle school I was hesitant but we did a long weekend in 6the grade where she missed 2 days and it was fine so we did it again adding a few days to spring break week and that was also fine. This year (7th grade), we're going for a long weekend in December. It did get away from me a bit in that it started off to be 3.5 days missed but will end up being 4 due to a flight change. Thurs-Fri and Mon-Tues. I'm a little concerned about DD12 falling behind but she is an A student so I think she will be fine.

I do check the calendar and avoid her missing anything critical as far as standardized testing. Some teachers will let her make up missed work and others will not. I'm OK with that but this will be the last year. The last year of MS and HS we'll stick to school vacation weeks.

brockash · Oct 8, 2015

Frozen2014 said:
We went to Disney World last October and had an amazing time. We will be returning (either to Disney World or Disneyland) in a few years. We have a big trip planned for April 2016 (a cruise which in the end will cost similar to Disney trip) so our next Disney trip will be say between 2017 and 2019. This means that our older one will be somewhere between Grade 6 and 8 (and between 11 and 14 years). I'm ok taking them out as family time is precious, but DH feels that he's getting too old...and i respect that. Only thing is it means our next trip will be either March Break, summer or Christmas. yikes...not the best time to come in terms of crowds or weather.

So how about other families? At what point whill you stop taking your kids out of school? Or is there no time and you're ok with it?

We have 3 kids (8th grader, 3rd grader and baby). I was never taken out of school as a kid, but I've taken mine out for a week every year. I think it just depends on your situation, your kids, how much work you're willing to do to teach them what they missed and help them with makeup work etc. So far, my kids have always been pretty good students, but if one of them wasn't then I may reconsider taking them out. We ended up not taking them (yet) this year just from scheduling, and I'm not going to lie it was really nice going without worrying about homework etc. I'm not really sure when we'll stop. Honestly, it's more of an issue with my oldest ones sports than anything else, so we'll see.

bonest · Oct 8, 2015

I am a teacher and have been in education for almost 20 years. I am about to take my boys (11 and 7) out of school for a week in November. Most affordable time for me and I would never want to fight crowds and heat in Summer. Anyway, I think there is nothing in the world wrong with them missing school. It is my experience that educators take things WAAYYY too seriously and that life is too short to worry about a week of school vs memories that will last a lifetime. Just my opinion. Lots dont agree with me, I understand that. I just think that, at the end of the day, there will never be a time that I say, "you know... my son is really struggling in life now because of that week of school he missed back in 2015" I did it 2 years ago as well, and no one remembers what was missed in school. Their grades didnt change that semester, and even if they had...big deal. I can tell you we talk about that trip every day and it is a special time that meant more to all of us than anything. Sorry... this is a bit of a sore subject with me...as you can probably imagine, I have had this conversation several times before.... Have fun!

cmarsh31 · Oct 8, 2015

bonest said:
I am a teacher and have been in education for almost 20 years. I am about to take my boys (11 and 7) out of school for a week in November. Most affordable time for me and I would never want to fight crowds and heat in Summer. Anyway, I think there is nothing in the world wrong with them missing school. It is my experience that educators take things WAAYYY too seriously and that life is too short to worry about a week of school vs memories that will last a lifetime. Just my opinion. Lots dont agree with me, I understand that. I just think that, at the end of the day, there will never be a time that I say, "you know... my son is really struggling in life now because of that week of school he missed back in 2015" I did it 2 years ago as well, and no one remembers what was missed in school. Their grades didnt change that semester, and even if they had...big deal. I can tell you we talk about that trip every day and it is a special time that meant more to all of us than anything. Sorry... this is a bit of a sore subject with me...as you can probably imagine, I have had this conversation several times before.... Have fun!

I totally agree - I'm a "retired" HS teacher (SAHM now). I always provided work to my students if they were going on vacation. I went through the same guilt last year from my ILs (also teachers). SIL even told me that my DS's teacher was going to "hold it against him" for the entire year because I took him out for 5 days at the end of Sept. It took everything I had to not comment that that would make her a terrible person if she was to do that - bc it was DEFINITELY what SIL was implying she did to her students (not a classroom teacher, special area one). Instead, DS's teacher asked if she could stow away in our luggage bc with a son who was a senior in HS, she couldn't pull him out to take a Disney vacation (she went in July, though, don't worry!).

leahgoogle · Oct 8, 2015

We took our then 5th and 1st graders out last year for 5 days over fall break. They were both fine. DS is now in Middle School (6th grade) and said that he wouldn't want to be gone that long because he would miss too much instructional time/homework.

kreckl · Oct 8, 2015

What on earth could your children be missing for a few days that would cause you to feel like they would be in so much trouble? What if they got the flu? Many kids miss lots of school- days here and there and big chunks. Sure if you could conveniently go during school vacation but that may be much more expensive and the family could possibly miss out and not go at all. Family first.
And believe me we go during weeks when there aren't school vacations and there are plenty of kids there. All ages.

Lori74 · Oct 9, 2015

bonest said:
I am a teacher and have been in education for almost 20 years. I am about to take my boys (11 and 7) out of school for a week in November. Most affordable time for me and I would never want to fight crowds and heat in Summer. Anyway, I think there is nothing in the world wrong with them missing school. It is my experience that educators take things WAAYYY too seriously and that life is too short to worry about a week of school vs memories that will last a lifetime. Just my opinion. Lots dont agree with me, I understand that. I just think that, at the end of the day, there will never be a time that I say, "you know... my son is really struggling in life now because of that week of school he missed back in 2015" I did it 2 years ago as well, and no one remembers what was missed in school. Their grades didnt change that semester, and even if they had...big deal. I can tell you we talk about that trip every day and it is a special time that meant more to all of us than anything. Sorry... this is a bit of a sore subject with me...as you can probably imagine, I have had this conversation several times before.... Have fun!

so happy to hear this. we are planning a surprise trip for our kids next month. i'm worried about being judged by their teachers and staff at school. i've been trying to figure out how to tell the school and teachers we will be gone. our school has a policy they won't give work ahead of time. i have one in high school and one in middle school. they are avg students that barely miss any time. i have guilt for taking them out. at the same time in my head i tell myself, they are my kids, i know what they can handle. life is too short and precious, and if this is the only time we can get away, it should be my decision without harsh judgement! i just hope they don't have to pay the price of the school judging.

What's your Threshold for Taking Kids out of School

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