Disney on Husband's Terms

[J'Adore Disney]

My husband does not feel or understand the Disney magic and I have accepted the fact that he never will. However, he does understand that Disney is my happy place and he will go with me to Disney but under his terms! His terms are as follows:

He will only stay in a deluxe resort with monorail service or within walking distance to a park. (He likes to have the option of making a quick exit!)

NO Value Resorts
NO Moderate Resorts
NO Disney bus transportation
NO Downtown Disney until Downtown Springs is 100% completed
NO character greets and meets
NO dining reservations
NO Fast Passes until we get to the park
NO lines (only ride if wait time is under 30 minutes)
NO souvenir shopping
NO pin trading
NO Mickey gear (I cannot wear my Mickey Ears, Mickey t-shirts or lanyard)
NO pin trading

Luckily, I live only 3 hours away and visit Disney 2-3 times a year, therefore, following his terms is not a problem. When I do go with him, I go in covert Disney fan mode. When I go with just my daughter and son, I let my inner child out to play!!! I proudly wear my Disney ears, lanyard, bedazzled sneakers, and excitingly break all his terms!!!

I please him as much as possible and try to make his visit a pleasant one. I understand he gets overwhelmed and I respect he would rather enjoy Disney low-key and not so robotically planned. My ONLY term when going to Disney with him is…GET A DRINK!!!

Our next couples-trip is coming up, first week of November. We are staying at the Yacht Club. Wish me luck! (This will be his 12th visit and my 40-something visit)

Do any of you have a spouse, partner, significant other with terms of their own???

 

[loves to dive]

First good luck, you picked a good resort for him since he can walk to not one but two resorts, walk through Epcot and monorail it to MK. It's also a great resort to just go to the bar and relax.

My DH will not go to Disney, hates crowds, hates rides, hates travelling, hates having to work with someone else's internet (owns his own computer consulting business so is always on call). I go either solo or with adult DS when he can get away. DH gets to sit at home with the puppy and watch what he wants to watch on TV, eat when and what he wants, not put down the toilet seat and put the TV as loud as he wants. Win, win for both of us.

 

[Elevationist]

Thank you for giving me reason #763 for why I'm so happy to be single.

 

[LinderInWonderland]

Fortunately for me, DH is as big of a kid as I am. The only thing I had to sell him on was Disneybounding for our next trip.

 

[LoodlesNoodles]

That sounds like hard work but if it works for you, enjoy!

 

[HizMinnie2015]

My DH has an inner child who is laid back and quiet no matter how excited he is. He's like this as an adult too. The only time I've ever seen that inner child jumping in excitement is when it has to do with Marvel or Transformers... He's quite the enthusiast about both areas. We have a collection of Transformers way back from the beginning in the 1980's. Some are worth quite a lot.

My point is, we all have something we enjoy and we have things we do because a significant other enjoys them. Personally I could not be married to someone if they told me how to vacation... I realize he doesn't love it, the way you do; but I would be unhappy "following" someone else's terms.

I'm glad that you can make this work and still enjoy the parks! We are going in 31 days and I know my DH is excited to go; even if I'm wearing all my Disney stuff and he just has a button on lol

 

[Sandi]

My DH sounds similar to your. He only goes to WDW to make me happy and, if DD will go with me, he'll stay home and take care of the cats. He has gone with me to celebrate anniversaries and the like, but his frequency is around the once every 4 years mark while mine is twice a year.

Your list made me think. Here's how I'd modify it for my DH:

ONLY deluxe resorts (and really only BWI)
ONLY Disney transportation or taxis
ONLY good restaurants (think signature dining)
HE DOES NOT SHOP (doesn't care if I want to shop)
NO thrill rides
NO lines (only ride if wait time is under 30 minutes)
MUST work rest time into the afternoon (doesn't care if I continue at a park on my own)
NO water parks
MUST order alcoholic beverages from Garden Grocer

He's a great guy, just not a Disney guy. I don't swim in Lake Superior as he and DD do every summer, but, similarly, that doesn't make me a bad person. I go on occasion and take the photos.

 

[larissawbb]

My DH is pretty awesome. Last year he caught the Disney cold thing going around and still keep marching to wherever I wanted to go.
His only thing is he doesn't do lines greater than 20 minutes and likes to take a guitar when we travel.

 

[ELSA711]

My DH knows where the door is if he ever gave me terms like that (j/k)

Not gonna ruin my fun cause you are a party pooper

 

[liquid17]

My husband has kind of opposite terms.

must be at Rope Drop. Yes, even on our first trip which was a late honeymoon (the kids and I break this once a trip for a lateish breakfast at Sunshine Seasons. We get to Epcot at 9 instead of 8:30!)

must not plan meals that take us out of the park during the day and preferably not in the evening if the park is still open

must not plan breaks during the day (I can take one but he and any kids who are still going strong keep going!)

must be at the MK as often as possible, so I have extra evenings planned at the MK after another park

must only expect him to do the World Showcase and DTD once a trip (since all but one of our trips have been with the kids, this has never been a problem. My girls and I would take extra trips to Epcot and hit the Boardwalk, DTD, etc. while he took the littles to the pool or, when they were older, rode more rides with our son.)

Our first *just us* trip is coming up and...well, I love Disney and am pleased to be planning again, but. I am not up to keeping up with him!!! I don't like ToT or Everest and it hasn't been a problem before. Now he thinks I should be bold and try them again! And he wanted to have a rule that we were in the parks every day, but I put my foot down on that one. I always plan a rest day in the middle. It kills him, but the kids need/love it. This trip - no rest day! He is like "we'll only be there 6 full days - why waste one!"

I want to have ice cream at Beaches and Cream after an Epcot day...and he would rather go back to the MK.

But. He will go and fill my mug with tea in the morning before I am up so it will be perfect drinking temp when I get out of the shower. And he lets me choose most of the restaurants and FPs. And he understands that our last day has to start in Epcot (so I can ride Soarin' one last time) and end in the MK (so we can walk down Main Street one last time).

So, it could be a lot worse!

ETA: Thought of a few more rules!

must not leave Disney property - no Universal, even for Harry Potter!
must not rent a car - he would rather stand on a Disney Bus than drive around
must get the most for our money every day!

 

[larissawbb]

My husband has kind of opposite terms.

must be at Rope Drop. Yes, even on our first trip which was a late honeymoon (the kids and I break this once a trip for a lateish breakfast at Sunshine Seasons. We get to Epcot at 9 instead of 8:30!)

must not plan meals that take us out of the park during the day and preferably not in the evening if the park is still open

must not plan breaks during the day (I can take one but he and any kids who are still going strong keep going!)

must be at the MK as often as possible, so I have extra evenings planned at the MK after another park

must only expect him to do the World Showcase and DTD once a trip (since all but one of our trips have been with the kids, this has never been a problem. My girls and I would take extra trips to Epcot and hit the Boardwalk, DTD, etc. while he took the littles to the pool or, when they were older, rode more rides with our son.)

Our first *just us* trip is coming up and...well, I love Disney and am pleased to be planning again, but. I am not up to keeping up with him!!! I don't like ToT or Everest and it hasn't been a problem before. Now he thinks I should be bold and try them again! And he wanted to have a rule that we were in the parks every day, but I put my foot down on that one. I always plan a rest day in the middle. It kills him, but the kids need/love it. This trip - no rest day! He is like "we'll only be there 6 full days - why waste one!"

I want to have ice cream at Beaches and Cream after an Epcot day...and he would rather go back to the MK.

But. He will go and fill my mug with tea in the morning before I am up so it will be perfect drinking temp when I get out of the shower. And he lets me choose most of the restaurants and FPs. And he understands that our last day has to start in Epcot (so I can ride Soarin' one last time) and end in the MK (so we can walk down Main Street one last time).

So, it could be a lot worse!

ETA: Thought of a few more rules!

must not leave Disney property - no Universal, even for Harry Potter!
must not rent a car - he would rather stand on a Disney Bus than drive around
must get the most for our money every day![/QUOTE

My husband has kind of opposite terms.

must be at Rope Drop. Yes, even on our first trip which was a late honeymoon (the kids and I break this once a trip for a lateish breakfast at Sunshine Seasons. We get to Epcot at 9 instead of 8:30!)

must not plan meals that take us out of the park during the day and preferably not in the evening if the park is still open

must not plan breaks during the day (I can take one but he and any kids who are still going strong keep going!)

must be at the MK as often as possible, so I have extra evenings planned at the MK after another park

must only expect him to do the World Showcase and DTD once a trip (since all but one of our trips have been with the kids, this has never been a problem. My girls and I would take extra trips to Epcot and hit the Boardwalk, DTD, etc. while he took the littles to the pool or, when they were older, rode more rides with our son.)

Our first *just us* trip is coming up and...well, I love Disney and am pleased to be planning again, but. I am not up to keeping up with him!!! I don't like ToT or Everest and it hasn't been a problem before. Now he thinks I should be bold and try them again! And he wanted to have a rule that we were in the parks every day, but I put my foot down on that one. I always plan a rest day in the middle. It kills him, but the kids need/love it. This trip - no rest day! He is like "we'll only be there 6 full days - why waste one!"

I want to have ice cream at Beaches and Cream after an Epcot day...and he would rather go back to the MK.

But. He will go and fill my mug with tea in the morning before I am up so it will be perfect drinking temp when I get out of the shower. And he lets me choose most of the restaurants and FPs. And he understands that our last day has to start in Epcot (so I can ride Soarin' one last time) and end in the MK (so we can walk down Main Street one last time).

So, it could be a lot worse!

ETA: Thought of a few more rules!

must not leave Disney property - no Universal, even for Harry Potter!
must not rent a car - he would rather stand on a Disney Bus than drive around
must get the most for our money every day!

The Harry Potter stuff at Universal is amazing. It may be worth it to sneak off on a mears shuttle for the day.

 

[BellsFam]

My DH...

#1 HAS TO EAT EVERY 3 HOURS - like a sit down meal, there is no eating in the room, etc., we must head down to the food court or a sit down breakfast (means waking up on vacation at like 6am!)
#2 HAS to be a deluxe resort... he wouldn't think of staying anywhere that requires a loong bus ride, he'd rather walk than ride the bus!!!
#3 HATES to shop, will let me shop, but stands there annoyingly like are we done!
#4 WON'T dress up (but I did get him to wear Disney shirts while we were there)
#5 DOESN'T DO RIDES! Like any thrill rides... like at all... (he did splash and Thunder... that was big for him)
#6 WILL STAND ON HIS HEAD FOR A MICKEY BAR!!! bahahahahaha... I'm converting him!!!

 

[georgina]

I could live with some of that, but not the no dining reservations and no FP, and NO ONE will tell me what I can't wear.

 

[J'Adore Disney]

Thank you for all of your replies Ladies!

I read my post and everyone's replies to DH and now he actually feels bad! Good... that was the plan!!!! Plus ... for the first time in forever, we made reservations to Spice Road Table! Yipee!!!

For the record, DH does enjoys Disney and looks forward to staying on property every time. He enjoys sitting on the balcony while drinking a coffee and enjoying the view (Boardwalk/Epcot hotels preferably), he has his favorite rides and places to eat. In the past, we've been lucky to get a table at Whispering Canyon, Crystal Palace, Villa Napoli (to name a few) without making a reservation!

DH simply prefers to go low-key and not make a big deal about things. Whereas, when my kids and I go solo, we enjoy showing our Disney side and definitely do not take our chances with dining.

 

[jessicar82]

Oh wow. If my husband laid out all those demands I would just leave him at home. But seriously, he tells you what to wear? For your sake I really hope he stays home so you can truly enjoy yourself.

 

[liquid17]

DH simply prefers to go low-key and not make a big deal about things. Whereas, when my kids and I go solo, we enjoy showing our Disney side and definitely do not take our chances with dining.

I can see why he would feel that way. We all have our preferences!

My husband's dream vacation is to spend a week in the Caribbean, learning to scuba dive, and relaxing on the beach. And my dream vacation is to go to Prague, Vienna, and Budapest and walk and see everything. And go to the opera. I think we could each manage each others vacation for about 3 days before dying of boredom. We both love Disney so the little details are not that big a deal. I hope! It will be interesting to see how this actually works!

And. I thought about how I have a rule too -

he may not wear socks with sandals

He obeys me pretty well

 

[J'Adore Disney]

I can see why he would feel that way. We all have our preferences!

My husband's dream vacation is to spend a week in the Caribbean, learning to scuba dive, and relaxing on the beach. And my dream vacation is to go to Prague, Vienna, and Budapest and walk and see everything. And go to the opera. I think we could each manage each others vacation for about 3 days before dying of boredom. We both love Disney so the little details are not that big a deal. I hope! It will be interesting to see how this actually works!

And. I thought about how I have a rule too -

he may not wear socks with sandals

He obeys me pretty well

Despite my husband's obnoxious terms, deep down he loves Disney. My dream vacation is Paris; husband's is being off the grid. We frequent the beaches a lot and love exploring new bicycling trails. But Disney holds a special place in our hearts, he would just rather keep it his little secret whereas I let the love pour out.

 

[kwdw]

I concur - no socks with sandals when wearing shorts is a rule I made for my boyfriend, too. It's okay if he's in pants.

He occasionally discourages my wearing of Disney T-shirts when headed out to dinner with him at home. But there's never a problem with Disney wear at Disney! Maybe that's fair!

 

[5kidsmommy]

I've bene married for 21 years and part of the reason our marriage is successful is because we don't put terms on each other, especially about what the other person wears. Yeah I'd draw the line there. Oh and if my husband didn't want ADRs or FP+ that would be fine, I'd make mine and let him figure out where the hell to eat.

Glad you get to go to Disney without him, if I were you I'd never go with him, sounds like a totally obnoxious control freak.

 

[J'Adore Disney]

I concur - no socks with sandals when wearing shorts is a rule I made for my boyfriend, too. It's okay if he's in pants.

He occasionally discourages my wearing of Disney T-shirts when headed out to dinner with him at home. But there's never a problem with Disney wear at Disney! Maybe that's fair!

I should have been more clear... my DH doesn't tell me what to wear, he simply prefers I turn it down a notch when going to Disney with him. A Mickey t-shirt is fine, but he would prefer I refrain from wearing my glitter Toms or Disney Princess Vans, my sequined ears, my lanyard, one of my Disney back-packs and all the "get-up" I usually wear with my DD22 (Disney CM). He actually loves my Minnie ears... but only when I wear them in the hotel room.