Have you done a Fish Extender? Will you do it again?

[Bonniec]

Seriously. I can't imagine why I'd want to spend hours before and on my vacation planning, buying, and distributing gifts to strangers. I can give my son the same experience by just buying for him and giving him a surprise each day (in fact, we do).

I say this with a lot of affection, really, but only women can create this scenario. There is no way a dude decides to spend a bunch of money on strangers, obsesses about whether gifts to random strangers are socially acceptable (am I cool enough? thoughtful enough? wealthy enough?), obsesses about whether strangers are fully appreciating what they're receiving, spends precious vacation time delivering packages to strangers, and then accounts for the relative worth of the trinkets received from strangers. It's so fascinating to see the energy that is devoted to planning this stuff, I do not get it at all. FEers have just created a whole new set of social obligations and anxieties completely out of thin air. It's not for us, that is for sure.

It's funny because my first thought about FE's was how odd it all was. I want to spend my vacation with family, not doing stuff with strangers or exchanging gifts with people I don't know. But then I kept seeing all these posts about it and started thinking maybe I wasn't in the Disney spirit. The conversation with my husband went something like this..."Honey, I know it's really wierd but maybe Mason (our son)would enjoy getting those little secret Santa-like gifts during the cruise." His reply, "Have you lost your mind? If you do that, I am not going. In fact, I might have to divorce you." So yeah, it's not for us. (Nor are the meet ups or the magnets.)


No offence to anyone who likes it, do what makes you happy. I clearly belong on that curmudgeon thread wherever it went. At least I am not alone in my scrooge ways. Maybe deep down I am really a man!

 

[thehowells]

We have joined our FE group for our cruise in September. This is our first cruise, thus our first FE. We are truly excited about giving a gifts to our group. Hopefully everything will be appreciated. Coming from Canada we have limited space & weight restrictions in our baggage and I'm sure whatever we decide to do will reflect this.

I know my kids will be ecstatic with anything they receive, and its really about them isn't it? There is more than enough information on the Internet about FE and if you are disappointed with the results of your FE, you obviously didn't do enough research. We have spent hours looking for photos of FE's and different gift ideas (so we don't disappoint).

I truly want to make this a memory my children will cherish and a life lesson of doing something nice for someone else (even if you don't know them). Hopefully others on my cruise feel the same.

 

[disneydiva16]

see, this is the kind of post that scares me. I always worry that what I do is not good enough.... and to think that people think that what I would give isn't good enough, is enough to derail me.

THis will be my 2nd Disney cruise and 2nd FE. To be honest, I didnt keep count on who gave what... or if anyone missed me the last time. My enjoyment came from seeing my 13 year old daughter light up each time she looked at our FE and found something, whether it be a piece of candy, sticker or a pillowcase... It didnt matter what she got, it was the fact that it was there and she was thought about.

I am not a crafty person, live in a small town where shopping is 40 minutes away... and in the winters it can take an hour through the snow covered icy mountains. I do order from Oriental trading, and do think of others when purchasing.. I take into account ages, and what i think they might like.

I really feel if you lay in judgement of things, you will never enjoy the true gift of giving, you might be better off not joining the FEs.

For me the non crafty person, I will continue to join, and do my best to make the next person smile.... even if they aren't in my fe!

I totally agree! My daughters got so excited coming back to our room to see what they had received in the FE. They love everything they got...right down to the pirate stickers! I will be doing it again on our upcoming cruise.

 

[iloverags2]

We ended a Fantasy cruise (Eastern C) today and participated in FE for our first time. We've cruised multiple times over several years and really hadn't paid much attention to the FEs at the doors, though we have really enjoyed the door decorations and wondered how to decorate our own.

As first time participants, we had two primary responses: 1) very fun, 2) anxiety over what we chose to give. I did some research after I stumbled onto the FE forum, trying to figure out what would be appropriate to give, and really didn't understand. I'm almost certain that receivers of our gifts could tell we were first time participants, and we're embarassed about the simplicity of our gifts.

Now that we've been through it once and have a better understanding, we'll definitely have more appropriate gifts to give next time (we didn't give candy--or any food for that matter, I figured ahead of time there was enough on the ship). It was very fun seeing the gifts and creativity, and we now have some door decorations, . . ., and we have a much better understanding about appropriate gifts. We love the items that were personalized to the state of origin, and we loved the Disney themed items.

For anyone who received FL recipes, we'll apologize for the simplicity of our gifts. Please sail with us again, and maybe you'll enjoy your next gift better. Many thanks as well to several who shared with us some of the cutest door decore. We love it, and walking the halls to find the rooms took us into parts of the ship we would not have otherwise seen--great fun!

We did recipes! Maybe I'll keep 'em in the mix.

I love to cook and bake, and would have been THRILLED with recipes!

 

[Smiley2411]

Boy oh boy...if I wasn't already stressed...
We are super excited about our first Disney cruise. I was becoming too overwhelmed planning a WDW vacation and decided on a cruise as we love cruising. I want both of my children to have wonderful, memorable experiences. At the age of 9 and 6 they will be super excited about anything they will get may it be trinkets, junk, etc. (crap) as others have posted. I am trying to put thought into what I will do for the teenagers/adults...as far as the kiddos they will get what kiddos like..

 

[Meghatron]

We are doing our first FE exchange next month. It was my husband who told me to sign up.

Yup. I knew about FE for our honeymoon and didn't sign up. Once we were on the ship my husband asked what all the hangers were and when I told him he was sad we didn't do it. So now we do the FE.

 

[FloridaFun]

Oh my God. Love it!!! I was getting so angry, but you made me laugh.
Now that is crafty!!!!

The thread was getting me upset too, so thought I would bring a little humor back into it. The FE is about having fun.

I can also guarantee people that this is not just for “women”. The Yoda graphic was sent to me by one of the guys in our upcoming FE group. Thanks Jeff! I just added the words at the top in my paint program.

PizzieDuster, if you really want it as a magnet, PM me your email address and I will send you the file.

I know there are some people from my upcoming February cruise’s FE group reading and posting here. Please do not let this post in anyway effect your participation in the FE. We have an amazing group and I am sure all gifts will be appreciated.

 

[DLBDS]

It's funny because my first thought about FE's was how odd it all was. I want to spend my vacation with family, not doing stuff with strangers or exchanging gifts with people I don't know. But then I kept seeing all these posts about it and started thinking maybe I wasn't in the Disney spirit. The conversation with my husband went something like this..."Honey, I know it's really wierd but maybe Mason (our son)would enjoy getting those little secret Santa-like gifts during the cruise." His reply, "Have you lost your mind? If you do that, I am not going. In fact, I might have to divorce you." So yeah, it's not for us. (Nor are the meet ups or the magnets.)


No offence to anyone who likes it, do what makes you happy. I clearly belong on that curmudgeon thread wherever it went. At least I am not alone in my scrooge ways. Maybe deep down I am really a man!

No offense taken here. I have to say though that I really don't understand why folks think so much time is taken away from their vaca to deliver FE gifts. I just want to make it clear... It only takes as much time as you want it to take. You can deliver on the way to anywhere. Are 'you' (meaning anyone who believes this) that busy that you have things planned for every minute around the clock? We break ours up. We deliver on this floor or that floor on different days throughout our vaca and when we find ourselves with nothing to do, we just deliver more gifts. Seriously, it doesn't take long to drop a bag/gift into a pocket beside a door. In fact, you don't even have to stop. Do an FE 'drive-by' if it makes you feel better!) It's fun. It's not a chore that takes time away from your vaca. It's A PART of your vaca that actually enhances it! And if you still find it to be a chore then the FE exchange is definitely not something that would appeal to you. As for 'doing stuff with strangers' are you talking about DIS folks or other cruisers? If you're talking about DISers then let me say that I feel the same way which is why I don't do the DIS meet-n-greets or link dining reservations or sign up to do excursions together etc. We ONLY do the FE exchanges. Nothing against other DISers! I just prefer to be anonymous. Yeah, I guess the FE sounds weird to those that have never done it but we've been doing it since our first Disney cruise and it's just always been a part of a Disney cruise experience. Not weird at all. As soon as we get our stuff in the room we unpack our magnets and FE and hang them on/beside the door. We love it.

 

[scrapbookmomma74]

Question for OP... How do your children feel about the FE exchange?

My children are older, 9 & 12. My children enjoyed some of the "stuff" that they got, but were kind of bewildered by the amount of candy that they received.
The things that they really enjoyed were the things that were made specifically for them, things with their name on them (ie. String backpack with DCL logo puffy painted onto it with their names, or waterbottles with their names)
Sadly, at the end of our cruises, much of the kids' FE stuff goes into the trash, as they don't want to carry it home. We usually bag up all of the candy to give to the kids' club staff.


To posters who say that they get OT stuff and then bag it up with cute little sayings, I say, "well done!".

All I was trying to stress was:
PUT SOME EFFORT INTO YOUR FE GIFTS...


As I have stated before, I love to GIVE gifts...I think in the future I'll avoid the FE, and just make things to give out randomly, or to people traveling with us. That is more my speed, and that way I can interact with the people who I'm giving to as well.

Thank you to those who have defended my opinion.
And to those who are mad at me and have felt that they need to tell me that I'm ungrateful or selfish, you are entitled to your opinion as well.
This is a discussion forum, I'm not sure where else is appropriate to bring up this topic...

 

[scrapbookmomma74]

The OP stated that they gave out facts, oreo's & business cards. Hmmm

That was my example of INEXPENSIVE FE gifts, if you go back and read it.
Would you like photos of what I made for my last cruise to criticize as well?

 

[BrennaM]

I had a fantastic FE group when I did it. I made handmade scrapbooks for the parents and homemade angry bird games for the kids (little pom pom birds and pigs with dixie cups to build into towers). I also made them each a personalized magnet for pirate night that I stuck on their doors in which I gave them all pirate names.

In return we received personalized pillowcases for the kids, they also got personalized pirate tshirts and tons of candy and stickers/tattoos. Handmade notepads as well as little bottle top pirate necklaces. My hubby and I received emergency kits (bandaids, kleenex, wetwipes etc.) Little mini bottles of rum, notepads, pencils and pens. A really nice handmade frame as well. There was so much more.

I really think you need to flesh out your FE groups. It also helps when you have SMALL groups!! That way you can spend a little more time on them and you aren't wasting soooo much time handing them all out. Lots of communication is key.

 

[DebbieOBX]

What is a fish extender? IM so confussed

thankssss

 

[Susiesark]

Something to think about. :

How it all started and why.

http://www.disboards.com/showpost.php?p=32102963&postcount=20

This is EXACTLY what I was thinking from the time I started reading the first post, that everyone seems to have lost sight of what the original FE organizer had in mind. It was a little gift exchange, with little treats. But some people have to outdo all the others and have the BEST and MOST THOUGHTFUL gift in the group. Well then, you should start your own group. It is not meant to be a burden or a hardship.

 

[DLBDS]

What is a fish extender? IM so confussed

thankssss

Google "fish extender" and click on 'Images'. Your screen will be flooded with images of FEs and their booty.

 

[honeybear66]

I had my first cruise on the Dream last October and took part in the F.E group that has been organised.

Myself and my DD loved walking round the ship dropping off our gifts, she was even more excited to get back to our stateroom to find gifts in our F.E! It really added to the excitment of our cruise and would happily take part in another one as my DD got such great enjoyment from it.

 

[tryin]

I teach and, trust me, kids do NOT think OT stuff is crap. most kids are just happy to receive things, stickers, candy (especially minebecause i do not allow candy on a regular basis), pencils, mini notebooks, etc. my students fall over themselves to get this "crap". I am doing my first FEE and it has been a little stressful because i do want people to like their gifts. I am thinking more for the children, than adults because i dont know anyone personally and adults are hard to please. Most Kids are more grateful. I will probably not do the next one, simply because as a newbie, i already have a lot of details to worry about. Once, i get the experience and the kinks out of organizing a first cruise for 5, i will have more brain cells to devote to the FEE. It has nothing to do with what i will or will not get. Im doing it now to give my kids the full disney cruise "experience". I am a poor teacher so who knows when we will be able to cruise again.

 

[4mousefans]

We ended a Fantasy cruise (Eastern C) today and participated in FE for our first time. We've cruised multiple times over several years and really hadn't paid much attention to the FEs at the doors, though we have really enjoyed the door decorations and wondered how to decorate our own.

As first time participants, we had two primary responses: 1) very fun, 2) anxiety over what we chose to give. I did some research after I stumbled onto the FE forum, trying to figure out what would be appropriate to give, and really didn't understand. I'm almost certain that receivers of our gifts could tell we were first time participants, and we're embarassed about the simplicity of our gifts.

Now that we've been through it once and have a better understanding, we'll definitely have more appropriate gifts to give next time (we didn't give candy--or any food for that matter, I figured ahead of time there was enough on the ship). It was very fun seeing the gifts and creativity, and we now have some door decorations, . . ., and we have a much better understanding about appropriate gifts. We love the items that were personalized to the state of origin, and we loved the Disney themed items.

For anyone who received FL recipes, we'll apologize for the simplicity of our gifts. Please sail with us again, and maybe you'll enjoy your next gift better. Many thanks as well to several who shared with us some of the cutest door decore. We love it, and walking the halls to find the rooms took us into parts of the ship we would not have otherwise seen--great fun!

Hey there! We were with you on the cruise and in your FE group! Thank you for the recipes...we enjoy getting things from fellow cruisers that relate to their "home".

This was our second FE and I tend to look at it like, "hmm...what would I appreciate recieving?". We tend to lean more towards practical gifts and so this year, our fellow FE friends received things like a fold-up laundry hamper, detergent pod and dryer sheet, post-its, a "mickey" clip, a few other things that I never remember to bring like safety pins, and a magnet that I created with some help from the disboards. It was a bit of a challenge to figure out a new and larger ships' layout, but well worth...not only did we get some much-needed exercise, but we came back to our stateroom to find surprises!

We missed the cruise meet with our fellow disers...the timing (3:15 on Saturday) just didn't work well. But, having met through the internet, I was able to recognize many about the ship and ports where we were able to chat. And, as fate would have it, we were seated on our return flight next to a family from the group...it was fun to compare experiences and get to know one another.

 

[lilpooh108]

deleted

 

[anamanxs]

I hope any new cruiser will look at the positive comments as well as the not so positive and do what their heart tells them to do. It is supposed to be fun and a way to spread Pixie dust around. If you are worried you wont want the dust then don't --don't participate - but don't ruin for the ones that want to do it.

 

[violetmonarch]