The disABILITIES board for a pregnancy/delivery discussion??
No doubt in my tiny little mind that Cyrano is a guy. Bless him.
Maybe the Disney for Families forum? Since we're talking about showing up at WDW and immediately squeezing out a newborn. There's a parenting question for you.
Seems to me that the ToT elevator ought to be a good birthing room. That sudden stop at the bottom should be a great help in getting that little tyke to pop out.
You're right, Cyrano is a guy.
I second ToT.
Although, they would need to time the drops with the pushing - and not sure how much help the midwife would be if she is screaming her head off. So, need to check first that the midwife is OK with dropping.
...am I the only one who gets that the entire post is a joke?
I am 99.9% sure there is no such friend. It's just a funny way to think up some ridiculous scenarios.
I'm not sure there is no such friend, but the original poster does seem to be looking for some fun (maybe because the friend won't be able to go).
But,
- after a long, slippery commute home, I need some laughs today,
- in a former professional life I taught prenatal and "Bath and Aftermath" classes for new parents,
- and, I've worked in in-patient Psych
So, I'm ready
First, she needs to watch some birth videos if its not her first baby. The only midwife who would agree to a trip is likely to 'not know nothing 'bout birthing no babies'.
(A certified nurse midwife has to work with a doctor who agrees to step in if any medical issues develop. If she shows up in an emergency room in labor, they will have no choice but to deliver the baby.
So, I'm guessing either the friend is kidding about a midwife coming along or is just doing wishful thinking.)
Second preparation would be to watch some births on soap operas. I'm sure she could get some good pointers there - those soap opera pregnant women never seem to deliver in hospitals. It's always somewhere out in the middle of nowhere (often in a snow storm, but at least she wouldn't have to worry about that in Florida in the summer).
No one has mentioned my obvious choice for the whole labor and delivery - Storybook Circus!
She can labor inside the waiting area tent by Dumbo. It's cool (have to be out of the Florida summer heat), there are lots of kids in there (so no one will notice another), and fairly noisy, with some screaming kids (in case she is a noisy laborer). There is a Dumbo up by the ceiling, flying around that she could use as a focal point during labor.
If she wants to walk around a bit outside, the Casey Jr. water play area would be a good place. The water spray would keep her cool, there are lots of kids (see above) and the animals plus the kids make lots of noise.
The Barnstormer is a nice little roller coaster to get things going - short and not as rough as some other roller coasters. (Although the warning does say expectant mothers should not ride, I think someone in labor would be exempt).
There are also nice bathrooms in the area (which any woman who has ever been pregnant knows you need to be near).
Dumbo is the obvious choice for the birth - Hello! Storks decorating the top of the ride.
My other choice would be the Tomorrowland area.
Stitch's Great Escape is usually not full, it's a pretty long attraction, usually some screaming and the darkness might be good (although the chili dog smell might be a bit much for someone in labor).
Tomorrowland Peoplemover would be a good choice. Even if its hot, the movement and elevation make it a little cooler. Its a long ride and seeing she is delivering a baby, they would probably let her stay on for a few rides if it's not busy. Being up high makes things a bit more private and it's very private when your car is inside a building.
Plus - this is the only ride where mom could be on one seat and the midwife could sit facing her. That is the most convenient arrangement for catching the baby
Another plus - if dad is in a car ahead or behind, he could get some good pictures of mom delivering the baby with the castle in the background.
Places not to go in MK -
Swiss Family Robinson Treehouse - they do have beds, but too many stairs.
Monster's, Inc. Laugh Floor - even though the Child Detection Agency is now the Comedy Detection Agency, I'm not sure I would trust them around children. Plus, I'm not sure Roz would be a good scene for labor (although I have known some L&D nurses who reminded me of Roz.
Animal Kingdom would be another good place, specifically Conservation Station.
They have vets there. If they have helped birth animal babies, human babies can't be that different. It's a long walk in from the train though, so she would need to time things so she has enough time to get from the train to the Conservation Station.
On second thought, AK might not be such a good choice. It closes early and there are quite a few carnivorous animals.