A Gay Vent!

[donaldduck352]

I'm so sick and tired of all the news lately over gay and same sex marriage.The Boy Scouts,the Chik-Fil-a etc.Give me a D*%# BREAK!!!

I'm not or ever will be gay.I've been married to my wife for over 25yrs.
On that note,we have got some of the best freinds,male and female,that are gay and I'm PROUD to call them very close freinds.Not one has ever pushed there beliefes on my DW or I.

Fact of the matter,I prefer to hang out with them in public then some narrow minded idiot that bashes them...

Yes I'm hetero to the core,but sick and tired of the bashing!!!!

Thank you for letting me vent.I hope I do not get points over this.

 

[HauntedBoy]

I hear ya. Turning on the news or checking the net, and it is all these stories about who doesn't like the gays. There are these heated debates about equal marriage and rights. It is just strange to see knowing that they are debating my life.

Sometimes, I get tired of it all. Want to avoid LGBT blogs or even hard news sites that cover these topics because it tends to bring me down. Another lesbian mutilated. Another gay guy's property destroyed. Another transgendered person killed. It gets to be a bit much.

But I am not gonna give up. They may tell me I am going to hell or that my partner of over 12 years isn't the same as their straight husband/wife. As the Australian MP brilliantly said, "I know what my family is worth."

So we deal with the debate, the pain and the harassment in the hope of making this world a better place in the future for all people, just as the generation of LGBT people did before me. Our time will come. And we need straight allies like you to help make it happen.

 

[LockShockBarrel]

I think people, more than years past, are ready for a change and that's why we're seeing it so prevelently in the media. It's finally becoming an issue that matters. As far as what's being featured, the "gay killed" or "lesbian fired from job", the negative things, maybe it's a matter of trying to show people how ridiculous the hatred has become. I think we'd all like to see more positive articles but look at the negative as a way to show others "This needs to stop" At least that's how I see it

 

[plinko]

I hear ya. Turning on the news or checking the net, and it is all these stories about who doesn't like the gays. There are these heated debates about equal marriage and rights. It is just strange to see knowing that they are debating my life.

Feel the same way. Some days it's wearying to turn on the news and I don't even pay it much mind, really... and then sometimes I randomly remember wow, these people who (mostly) don't have any idea what it's like or who I am are sitting there debating and voting on my life and rights as a human being. Kind of scary in some ways.

It's always a relief to hear from heterosexuals who don't have a figurative dog in the fight, yet are vocally supportive anyway. Gives some hope that maybe our rights won't always be on the whims of others.

 

[shoney]

Change takes time and dedication to the cause.

I am confident that things will change and everyone will have equal rights. It will be a hard road and I will fully support it!

A cute story that give me hope....

My husband and I became friends with a gay couple from England while we were visiting a Mexican all inclusive resort. They approached us to take a picture of them while we were sitting in the lobby. Later they told us they felt comfortable because of our NY accents LOL! They had traveled to NY the year prior and thought the city was a very friendly place!

During the trip, DS11 asked me if they were brothers. I told him "no, they are married" (they had wedding rings on!) and his response was "oh".

About 6 months later ds10 came home from school upset that a kid on the bus told him "he looked gay" because he has longer hair and an earring. I explained to him that there is not such thing as "looking gay". "Being gay" just means that you prefer to marry a man if you are a man or marry a woman if you are a woman. (that may be a pretty dumb explanation, but I was caught off guard)

I asked him if he remembered mommy and daddy's friends from Mexico. He said "yes". I said "well they are gay, did they look it?" He was shocked "they were gay...I thought they were friends". I said "yes they are friends, but friends like mommy and daddy are". He was happy with that and I never heard him complain about that kid again.


Maybe the next generation will have much different views!

 

[Epcot82Guy]

I just stumbled across this thread. That is a really great story, Shoney. Thanks for being a great parent.

 

[George Kaplan]

That was pretty adorable, Shoney: you are the coolest!

 

[B's Marie]

Change takes time and dedication to the cause.

I am confident that things will change and everyone will have equal rights. It will be a hard road and I will fully support it!

A cute story that give me hope....

My husband and I became friends with a gay couple from England while we were visiting a Mexican all inclusive resort. They approached us to take a picture of them while we were sitting in the lobby. Later they told us they felt comfortable because of our NY accents LOL! They had traveled to NY the year prior and thought the city was a very friendly place!

During the trip, DS11 asked me if they were brothers. I told him "no, they are married" (they had wedding rings on!) and his response was "oh".

About 6 months later ds10 came home from school upset that a kid on the bus told him "he looked gay" because he has longer hair and an earring. I explained to him that there is not such thing as "looking gay". "Being gay" just means that you prefer to marry a man if you are a man or marry a woman if you are a woman. (that may be a pretty dumb explanation, but I was caught off guard)

I asked him if he remembered mommy and daddy's friends from Mexico. He said "yes". I said "well they are gay, did they look it?" He was shocked "they were gay...I thought they were friends". I said "yes they are friends, but friends like mommy and daddy are". He was happy with that and I never heard him complain about that kid again.


Maybe the next generation will have much different views!

Love your honest response!
My husband and I are "surrounded by the gay lifestyle" lol!
Seriously, we are friends with a great group of guys (happen to be homosexual) and have relatives that are lesbian and gay.
I long for a world where I do not feel like my kids are the only ones not making "gay" jokes or comments. My son has, also , been accused of looking gay... weird thing is, he looks the same as his friends, only skinnier.
It is scary that a world full of "progress" is still so homophobic!
Hope I did not just hijack the venting, but thank you

 

[figaro2]

Change takes time and dedication to the cause.

I am confident that things will change and everyone will have equal rights. It will be a hard road and I will fully support it!

A cute story that give me hope....

My husband and I became friends with a gay couple from England while we were visiting a Mexican all inclusive resort. They approached us to take a picture of them while we were sitting in the lobby. Later they told us they felt comfortable because of our NY accents LOL! They had traveled to NY the year prior and thought the city was a very friendly place!

During the trip, DS11 asked me if they were brothers. I told him "no, they are married" (they had wedding rings on!) and his response was "oh".

About 6 months later ds10 came home from school upset that a kid on the bus told him "he looked gay" because he has longer hair and an earring. I explained to him that there is not such thing as "looking gay". "Being gay" just means that you prefer to marry a man if you are a man or marry a woman if you are a woman. (that may be a pretty dumb explanation, but I was caught off guard)

I asked him if he remembered mommy and daddy's friends from Mexico. He said "yes". I said "well they are gay, did they look it?" He was shocked "they were gay...I thought they were friends". I said "yes they are friends, but friends like mommy and daddy are". He was happy with that and I never heard him complain about that kid again.

Maybe the next generation will have much different views!

That's a really sweet story!
I have lots of gay friends and have been brought up in a house were my parents did too, i like to think my children will feel the same as I do, there is no issue with sexual orientation, some people are straight some people are not, who cares! We are all people! It leaves me confused why some people find issues with things like this

Live and let live!

On the list of things I like in a friend, I think I probably care more about if they like chocolate or not than what they prefer in a mate lol!

 

[lynypixie]

I am glad to live in a country with anti discriminations laws. (I'm from Montréal)

I am not even close to being gay, and I do not have much gays around me (I just don't have a lot of social life ) But I am strongly for gay rights. I even wrote on the oreo facebook page (where I got more than a hundread replies!) to congratulate them.

I just don't see what other people's sex and sentimental lives have to do with mine. If your religion says you can be mean to other people, then you got your religion wrong. I studied in a catholic school, and not once did they tell us to be mean to people who are different.

I just don't see why they are putting so much energy being negative over stuff that doesn't even conserns them. Being good and positive is so much more rewarding!

 

[LockShockBarrel]

Most people would say its religion that has played a big part in why people think its so wrong (at least most straight people who are pro gay that I know) That the church doesn't believe in marriage unless it's between a man and woman. Which truthfully, the church has every right to say who can and can't marry. A state or country who tries to make that decision however, that's a whole nother story.

At least in the states, I can't believe we've gotten so far away from the original freedoms and rights and ideals that were fought so hard for. It's so cliche but people need to "get used to it!" Why so many feel like its any business of theirs who someone wants to love is beyond me.

 

[Safari Queen]

As several people have said recently, our children's children will read 21st century history and not believe there was a time when people were discriminated against because of their sexual orientation or that gay marriage was controversial.

 

[DOPEYLUVER]

Most people would say its religion that has played a big part in why people think its so wrong (at least most straight people who are pro gay that I know) That the church doesn't believe in marriage unless it's between a man and woman. Which truthfully, the church has every right to say who can and can't marry. A state or country who tries to make that decision however, that's a whole nother story.

At least in the states, I can't believe we've gotten so far away from the original freedoms and rights and ideals that were fought so hard for. It's so cliche but people need to "get used to it!" Why so many feel like its any business of theirs who someone wants to love is beyond me.

Straight, married woman here.

I have a whole struggle with gay marriage because I have a whole struggle with marriage. I think "back in the day" marriage was to form a family unit, where maybe the whole was more than the sum of the parts. A husband, a stay at home mom and kiddies. I'm just not sure what marriage really is. I think party of my jaded view came from a very good friend of mine. She was married to a lawyer for more than 30 years. They have 5 pretty much grown kids. She was a stay at home mom for much of her married life, giving up a very promising career in finance. Her lawyer husband prepared for the divorce for a couple of years. In the end for one reason or another, she ended up with nothing. She was even forced to carry health insurance for the family. So, what is marriage? I really don't know.

In light of that, I am not for marriage. I don't know what purpose it serves. BUT since it exists for some, I do think it should exist for all.

I also struggle with the church part of it. Would it be OK if a church refused to marry an African American couple.

I think I just over think things.

I guess one good sign is that my 20 year old daughter is already of the mind of truly not understanding the controversy. Maybe cause gay marriage has been legal in Massachusetts for a good part of her "adult" lfe.

 

[Aulika]

In France, the government want to legalize gay marriage. I am happy for the people who are going to be able to get married but i am not looking forward to the debates around this topic. This is not going to be pretty.
Frankly, i don't care about people sexual orientation and i don t think it should be a public matter. The world would be a better if we would just stop judging other people lifestyle choice.
I believe thatthe Church are entilted to do whatever they want our only choice is notto attend them not to support them. My choice does not care about what you do in bed as long as it is only between consenting adults and i love them for that.

 

[furb & dez]

I think "back in the day" marriage was to form a family unit, where maybe the whole was more than the sum of the parts. A husband, a stay at home mom and kiddies.

Marriage, for most of its existence has (and still to a point is) been about property. The idea of "marrying for love" is a relatively recent concept. The point of marriage was to seal deals, transfer land/keep land/property/money within a family.

It's only "recently" that women were no longer considered property in the Western world, and people seem to blithely forget that. It's been, what, only 100 years that they could vote in this country? People forget that too... a woman, only 100 years ago, was a mere accessory and possession of her husband, and in some places/schools of thought they are still considered to be so (can't get any more detailed due to board rules).

 

[DOPEYLUVER]

Good point F & D. This furthers my point that the whole institution of marriage is just antiquated.

 

[Vangogh]

Marriage, for most of its existence has (and still to a point is) been about property. The idea of "marrying for love" is a relatively recent concept. The point of marriage was to seal deals, transfer land/keep land/property/money within a family.

It's only "recently" that women were no longer considered property in the Western world, and people seem to blithely forget that. It's been, what, only 100 years that they could vote in this country? People forget that too... a woman, only 100 years ago, was a mere accessory and possession of her husband, and in some places/schools of thought they are still considered to be so (can't get any more detailed due to board rules).

that's what i was gonna say, pretty much verbatim. well said!

 

[Rememberingthe70s]

Gay married man here.

I love my marriage. We were finally allowed to marry (New York) after 11 years together. My marriage means I've publicly committed to my husband, and celebrated our relationship with our loved ones. It means we have the right to be recognized as equal. It means we wanted to share an event with those who were supportive of us for 11 years. We're not really very political people, but also ...

On the flip side, it means we can visit each other (without question or interference) in the hospital. It means we can choose whichever insurance plan we want, and provide it for our spouse. It means when one of us passes on, the other is legally entitled to the things we accumulated together for 40+ years.

 

[DVCDan36]

Gay married man here.

I love my marriage. We were finally allowed to marry (New York) after 11 years together. My marriage means I've publicly committed to my husband, and celebrated our relationship with our loved ones. It means we have the right to be recognized as equal. It means we wanted to share an event with those who were supportive of us for 11 years. We're not really very political people, but also ...

On the flip side, it means we can visit each other (without question or interference) in the hospital. It means we can choose whichever insurance plan we want, and provide it for our spouse. It means when one of us passes on, the other is legally entitled to the things we accumulated together for 40+ years.

Remembering, my husband and I have been together for almost 13 years, and just recently got married as well. 10 years ago, my husband was hospitalized and I had to lie just to visit him and when he was unable to work due to medical issues, we lost out on many benefits due to our inability to be married at the time or the fact that we shared a house. We are not ones to look for hand outs, but at the time we nearly lost everything, how we squeaked by and made it is a miracle. Thankfully, he got better, and things are looking up every day.
We sometimes think about moving out of state, but realize that we won't get the same benefits outside of New York. Now, only if the rest of the US and the Federal Government would stop treating marriage and rights as a bargaining chip and give all tax payers equal rights.
P.S. we are at the foothills of the Adirondacks and enjoy many trips through area.

 

[Tony-NJ]

In France, the government want to legalize gay marriage. I am happy for the people who are going to be able to get married but i am not looking forward to the debates around this topic. This is not going to be pretty.
Frankly, i don't care about people sexual orientation and i don t think it should be a public matter. The world would be a better if we would just stop judging other people lifestyle choice.
I believe thatthe Church are entilted to do whatever they want our only choice is notto attend them not to support them. My choice does not care about what you do in bed as long as it is only between consenting adults and i love them for that.

Late as usual - but please note it's not a lifestyle "choice" .