The mortgage, P&I, Taxes, and Insurance is just under $2,800 a month. That is more like 50% of our budget...but trust me...that is normal for this area.
Something doesn't add up. If your salaries before taxes are $100K, and your monthly housing expenditure would be $2800, then you would be spending 33% of your gross on housing, not 50%. By 50%, do you mean of your TAKE HOME salaries (after tax, medical, 401K deductions)?
At 33% of gross salary, I'd say...maybe. Even that is steep, but we do have to consider the area you live in. But do you have other required expenses that change this -- loans, high debt, medical bills, childcare (now or future), etc -- then regardless of how much "better" it is than it was before, it's probably not a good idea until your debt is lower. If you fudged a little on saying you have a $100K'ish salary and you really are spending 50% of your gross salary, then I'd say no way. I don't care how "common" it is for your area, stop and think that is is exactly why so many people are losing their homes right now -- because they decided they needed to be home owners, despite the writing on the wall. It may not be fair that other people can afford houses while other's can't, but that's life. Unfortunately for some, homeownership just means making hard choices -- we transfer to more affordable areas, live rural when we'd rather live urban, give up certain luxuries. And sometimes you just decide you'd rather rent than move out of the best parts of town/state/etc or give up a certain lifestyle.
After DH and I in the last recession both lost our jobs within a week of each other 3 short months after buying our first house, we decided then and there that our next home would be purchased on the basis of only one salary. It's simply not worth the stress and heartache. That means we had to make a lot of compromises: we waited three more years before we bought another house, and this isn't what I'd call my dream house, let alone a city I really care for (ugh...my neighbors
), the commute stinks, but it's WAY less likely to keep us awake at night whenever job security gets iffy, or real estate tanks.
I would just be very cautious right now -- what is your job security, what happens if just one of you can't work or find a job, how "flexible" is your budget..i.e. what can you give up and still pay mortgage, what is your savings safety net, and what is your debt: income ratio? Just think about it a little longer, and don't be tricked into buying b/c "everyone else does it". Don't forget, you'll probably see even more decreases in real estate costs over the next year (this real estate problem isn't going away anytime soon), so waiting a few months to figure this out won't kill you.
Best of luck to you.