You won't believe what I saw at the food bank!

[CandleontheWater]

Its cheaper to get a pre-paid phone plan with data then it is to pay for a landline (especially if you factor in long distance) and internet. Most pre-paid phone plans offer smartphones, or you can get an iphone from ebay or an older version from a friend or relative.

Also going the wired route can involve credit checks and deposits that a "poor" person may not be able swing, plus there is an issue if they don't have a reliable place to live. If they are not "home secure" (which applies to a surprising number of the working poor), than a landline/wired internet isn't going to work for them.

Really if you are going to be a total scrooge, you should be pissed if you see a "poor" person WITHOUT a smartphone, because going a traditional wired route is more expensive, and we all know that the extra money could be put towards food.

 

[pocomom]

These stories confuse me. If I could loan out my Mercedes and it my grand kids designer clothes why would I not also buy them food? Food is far more important than designer clothes.

I must think differently. I have paid to drop a new transmission into my sister's car. Bought many people food, when I knew they need some extra help. Bought clothes for kids who needed it.

Food is the most basic need. Why would they not supply that when they obviously have the means?

I'm not sure this adds to the discussion but my parents didn't buy us food because they were out of state and unaware of how bad things had gotten. There is a lot of shame involved when you fall on hard times, and it is compounded by the constant judgment of others.
Not every extended family has the means either. My parents were well off, but as retirees they were still on a budget. How many people can take on the extra unexpected burden of 3 people for an extended period of time?

I do feel like my situation could happen to just about anyone. As a 20 something with young kids, I was prepared for an event to happen. We didn't rely on credit, we had savings... but two events? I had a serious injury requiring multiple surgeries, two young kids at home and my husband decided he couldn't take the pressure and took off with all our money. Things can turn very quickly with a big life event, or especially two. How many middle class families are prepared to weather that these days? even ones making the right decisions? And it happens...

I remember one day the water was shut off. I had tried for weeks to get the bill turned over, but the company wanted permission from HIM too since it was his name on the account. He had it forwarded the bills to his friend's house, so I had no idea what was owed on it, if he was paying it, nor could I get it switched over since he was just gone... I called when it was shut off and they still wouldn't tell me what was owed, I went to the office with cash and begged and finally the lady told me the total. I was short just a few dollars, and I couldn't help it, I burst into tears. The lady looked at me and said "ma'am if you don't want to have to pay a reconnect fee you shouldn't be so irresponsible with your bills."
When you are in that situation you are being judged constantly at every turn, even if you are doing everything you can to get out of it.

 

[cjbcam]

You do realize to that Aboriginal man you are judging, you are a foreigner unless you too are aboriginal but based on the tone of your post I don't think so. I live in Canada and I completely disagree with almost everything in your post.

Actually I'm not a foreigner and I'm not going to debate that on this thread. Everything I said was true and I do believe Canada should do stuff like food stamps so people's kids aren't starving because their parents spent all their money on booze and smokes. I believe you are the one that posted something about not judging because someone is smoking while lined up at the food bank because its an addiction? Smokes cost nearly 15 dollars a pack so yeah I am going to judge someone who can afford cigarettes but says they can not afford food. People need food to survive they don't need cigarettes. I am a person that also believes Canada should also implement what some of the states are, drug testing to get a welfare check. People fall on hard times and need help sometimes and it's people that take advantage of that that make people reluctant to just blindly give and hope the truly needy get it. I would rather give to people I know that need it, like the little boy that I fed lunch to and sometimes dinner to for nearly two years (with his parents permission) because his parents couldn't. Eventually the bank took their house. They both worked min wage jobs and still couldn't make ends meet. Those are the people that deserve the help.

 

[skylizard]

I'm a grandmother, my daughter is on food stamps for whatever reason. I decide to take the family, daughter and kids to wdw. You hear them talking about their upcoming trip in the supermarket using food stamps. Do you then decide it's fraud (I'm betting yep)? Is the daughter an food stamp abuser because she doesn't turn down the trip?

Do I think she is? NO. But most people would jump to the conclusion that she was without knowing the background info. And that's the problem with so many people thinking that there's so many abusers in the system. They hear one story about how some kid is going to Disney while their mom used food stamp to pay for their groceries, and they tell that to all of their friends and relatives. Next thing you know, all food stamp users are abusers, shouldn't own cell phones, and should't buy skittles with their food stamps.

It's ridiculous. People really need to mind their own business and stop gossiping so much.

 

[lizabu]

Actually I'm not a foreigner and I'm not going to debate that on this thread. Everything I said was true and I do believe Canada should do stuff like food stamps so people's kids aren't starving because their parents spent all their money on booze and smokes. I believe you are the one that posted something about not judging because someone is smoking while lined up at the food bank because its an addiction? Smokes cost nearly 15 dollars a pack so yeah I am going to judge someone who can afford cigarettes but says they can not afford food. People need food to survive they don't need cigarettes. I am a person that also believes Canada should also implement what some of the states are, drug testing to get a welfare check. People fall on hard times and need help sometimes and it's people that take advantage of that that make people reluctant to just blindly give and hope the truly needy get it. I would rather give to people I know that need it, like the little boy that I fed lunch to and sometimes dinner to for nearly two years (with his parents permission) because his parents couldn't. Eventually the bank took their house. They both worked min wage jobs and still couldn't make ends meet. Those are the people that deserve the help.

Nope. That wasn't me. And smokes can be purchased for much less than $15 a pack. My sister buys 200 for $20. Everyone comes from somewhere else. Even Aboriginals came from somewhere else via ice bridge. I think there are a lot more people out there NOT spending their money on booze and smokes than there are people who do. The fact is child care is expensive and welfare doesn't give a person much money. Going to a food bank is not an easy thing to do. I believe people deserve to keep their dignity and not be judged by other who assume if they've fallen on hard times it's because they made bad decisions. Sometimes things happen. And those things can be beyond your control.


ETA- I think what I'd like you to come away from this conversation is we all all really alike. Our similarities are stronger than our differences. Whether a person is white, aboriginal or foreign we are the same. We all deserve respect and dignity. There may be people who make bad choices but we don't walk in another's shoes. Feeding ones family is a right. Anyone of us could have ended up in a situation where we needed help. The least we can do as human beings is not judge another.

 

[angierae]

Actually I'm not a foreigner and I'm not going to debate that on this thread. Everything I said was true and I do believe Canada should do stuff like food stamps so people's kids aren't starving because their parents spent all their money on booze and smokes. I believe you are the one that posted something about not judging because someone is smoking while lined up at the food bank because its an addiction? Smokes cost nearly 15 dollars a pack so yeah I am going to judge someone who can afford cigarettes but says they can not afford food. People need food to survive they don't need cigarettes. I am a person that also believes Canada should also implement what some of the states are, drug testing to get a welfare check. People fall on hard times and need help sometimes and it's people that take advantage of that that make people reluctant to just blindly give and hope the truly needy get it. I would rather give to people I know that need it, like the little boy that I fed lunch to and sometimes dinner to for nearly two years (with his parents permission) because his parents couldn't. Eventually the bank took their house. They both worked min wage jobs and still couldn't make ends meet. Those are the people that deserve the help.

You do realize that studies have repeatedly shown that drug testing for welfare benefits actually costs MORE to do the testing than any money that is saved in kicking people off; right?

I don't like the idea of parents on drugs and kids not getting food, but if we want to be fiscally responsible with our tax money, spending it drug testing welfare recipients is a bad use of money, that has been shown in several studies.

 

[ceecee]

The first thing a RESPONSIBLE person would do if they smoke and run short of $, to stop smoking. That would go a long way towards food. Unfortunately a lot of the people on assistance are 3rd and 4th generation and they have not learned responsibility. These are the parents who return their kid's gifts and use their gift cards when the kids get them for toys and it does happen. Govt assistance was supposed to be a help when needed, not a way of life.

 

[Granny square]

You do realize that studies have repeatedly shown that drug testing for welfare benefits actually costs MORE to do the testing than any money that is saved in kicking people off; right? I don't like the idea of parents on drugs and kids not getting food, but if we want to be fiscally responsible with our tax money, spending it drug testing welfare recipients is a bad use of money, that has been shown in several studies.

Yep. Try to tell that to the fb crowd. Many who have received some sort of benefit from the govt.

Lol, especially drug testing for college students to get their grants and subsidized loans

 

[angierae]

The first thing a RESPONSIBLE person would do if they smoke and run short of $, to stop smoking. That would go a long way towards food. Unfortunately a lot of the people on assistance are 3rd and 4th generation and they have not learned responsibility. These are the parents who return their kid's gifts and use their gift cards when the kids get them for toys and it does happen. Govt assistance was supposed to be a help when needed, not a way of life.

I watched my dad die of lung cancer unable to stop smoking. It's a horrible addiction and this is why I think we should make sure people never start. I am not going to judge someone who can't quit. My dad had just turned 43 when he died.

 

[Granny square]

I watched my dad die of lung cancer unable to stop smoking. It's a horrible addiction and this is why I think we should make sure people never start. I am not going to judge someone who can't quit. My dad had just turned 43 when he died.

I'm sorry about your dad. My grandma, the sweetest little home ec teacher passed of lung cancer. :/

 

[Ladygoldenhair]

I read on AOL today that last Friday EVERYONE receiving food stamps had their amount CUT as of that date. I feel badly for those people who depend upon food stamps to feed their families. There was speculation that food banks would feel the crunch as well because those families would have to depend more heavily upon them. I fear that some children will go hungry this month as a result of the cut.

Cash assistance was removed in our area last year too. I have a mom I barter service with, cleaning in exchange for rides. One of the trips is to the food bank. I was concerned how many items were past their expiration dates. It is one thing to have day old bakery goods, but the cans some were from 2009, or earlier.

 

[pampam]

My sister will only give cereal to the food bank. Her reasoning is this. If the parent responsible for the child is unable to get the child ready for school for what ever reason ( drunk, ill, sleeping, looking after whatever responsibilities they may have etc) even a small child could open up a box of cereal and get somethin to eat. Even if a child is left alone with a box of cereal, they can have dinner.

 

[Princess Disney Mom]

My sister will only give cereal to the food bank. Her reasoning is this. If the parent responsible for the child is unable to get the child ready for school for what ever reason ( drunk, ill, sleeping, looking after whatever responsibilities they may have etc) even a small child could open up a box of cereal and get somethin to eat. Even if a child is left alone with a box of cereal, they can have dinner.

So smart. I will start giving cereal too. Thanks.

 

[trinchick]

My sister will only give cereal to the food bank. Her reasoning is this. If the parent responsible for the child is unable to get the child ready for school for what ever reason ( drunk, ill, sleeping, looking after whatever responsibilities they may have etc) even a small child could open up a box of cereal and get somethin to eat. Even if a child is left alone with a box of cereal, they can have dinner.

This just makes me too sad to even think about.

We give regularly to several food pantries (via our own church, DD's school, our town, and another local church). I always feel good when I give, and I always try to focus on the children and the elderly who benefit from these programs.

I do, however, agree that there are many people who receive SNAP and/or food pantry benefits who make choices that I can't agree with (e.g., cigarettes, smart phones, fancy sneakers, etc.). Let's face it, it's often (not always) an accumulation of poor decisions that get these people into situations of need or want.

And honestly, I don't necessarily trust many of these people to choose nutritious food for their kids over getting their nails done, lottery tickets, or other non-necessity. Therefore, I have to consciously choose to let these reservations go, and give with a generous heart in the hope that the children are the people who I'm helping.

 

[Granny square]

This just makes me too sad to even think about. We give regularly to several food pantries (via our own church, DD's school, our town, and another local church). I always feel good when I give, and I always try to focus on the children and the elderly who benefit from these programs. I do, however, agree that there are many people who receive SNAP and/or food pantry benefits who make choices that I can't agree with (e.g., cigarettes, smart phones, fancy sneakers, etc.). Let's face it, it's often (not always) an accumulation of poor decisions that get these people into situations of need or want. And honestly, I don't necessarily trust many of these people to choose nutritious food for their kids over getting their nails done, lottery tickets, or other non-necessity. Therefore, I have to consciously choose to let these reservations go, and give with a generous heart in the hope that the children are the people who I'm helping.

"These people". Wow.

Coming from a town hit hard "these people" poor choices came from trusting a company not to go down the toilet putting 18000 out of work. Those poor people. Probably deserved it...

 

[pocomom]

"These people". Wow.

Coming from a town hit hard "these people" poor choices came from trusting a company not to go down the toilet putting 18000 out of work. Those poor people. Probably deserved it...

Yes the "these" people at my food bank included seniors who worked hard, saved, retired, had their savings demolished by Wall Street and then had to make choices between food and medications they needed... I guess their "poor choice" was continuing to live past retirement?
And of course my friend's husband who made the "poor choice" to go to Iraq and got shot for his country.
And "these" old ladies that made the poor choice to care for children that weren't their responsibility.
And "these" families that got laid off ....
Well at least you give a can of soup to go with your judgment.... Wonder how many hearts here would be opened by spending a few hours down at the food bank and actually getting to know some of the clients?

 

[trinchick]

Actually that's a mis-quote... I said "Many of these people." There's a big difference, but it's a nuance that is easily missed if one is feeling a bit defensive.

Just as every SNAP/food pantry recipient isn't a fraud, nor are they all victims of circumstance.

I think that's the take-away from this entire thread. We've all seen situations where people with genuine need were able to access assistance, and we've all seen situations where we don't agree with all the actions of the recipients. Rather than debate it, I think it's best to acknowledge that the system isn't perfect, but there are people who truly need it. I, for one, am glad that there's a privately-funded neighbor-to-neighbor way of achieving this, i.e., the food pantry.

 

[RainbowBrite]

Your view is better than mine, it sounds like the individuals at your area food bank need the help.

I drive by a bus stop that is located in front of the food bank in my city. I drive by every weekday. I see adults in their 20s, and 30s who have their food bank bags on the floor of the bus shelter because they are always texting on their phone with one hand and have a cigarette in the other.

I live in Canada where cell phone service ($150 a month minimum) and cigarettes ($90 a carton) are very expensive.

I believe the people who really need the help often don't get the food and the others are using the local food bank to allow them spending money for their vices.

Last year on the news there was video of families lined up for their turkey and toy basket for Christmas. I noticed as did my coworkers that everyone in the shot had a phone in their hand.

You know, my uncle, who is on disability because of a very rare skin disorder as well as a rare eye condition that left him blind in one eye was given a free cell phone and a certain number of minutes/texts per month. Perhaps you shouldn't be so quick to judge.

 

[Andrea]

I am a very heavy couponer. Meaning I get whatever I can cheap or free. I have two sections in my car when i grocery shopping. One section comes home with me the other section goes straight to our local food bank. They are always in need and when i drop off once a week the workers are so happy to see me.

 

[Granny square]

I am a very heavy couponer. Meaning I get whatever I can cheap or free. I have two sections in my car when i grocery shopping. One section comes home with me the other section goes straight to our local food bank. They are always in need and when i drop off once a week the workers are so happy to see me.

I do the same. Some coupons but also loss leaders