WWYD - Neighbor owes me money...

[mefordis]

Yes, at my sisters old house. For some reason she and her neighbor did not get along, so she ran a fence on the side of her property and they ran one as well....with about a foot inbetween. It was a nightmare. My son bought her house, and got along well with the neighbor, so he just took care of the "growth" that kept popping up in there.

My neighbor put his fence up and had asked me if I cared. No. (My DH did, but he cant stand the guy or fences, so...) he had to put the "nice" side facing us. It is on the property line I think, but I was okay with it.

The guy behind me mentioned getting a fence but we have a fence already, and plan to replace it next spring with a nicer one. I hope he doesn't get the fence. Ours is 1-5 feet into our property. I plan to move the new one we get a bit further so we can use our property, which he said we should do. We are on good terms but don't know one another very well. I brought up the possibility of sharing the new fence but he mentioned the fact that someone should own it since one day we will sell the property and it makes things easier.

 

[mnrose]

I'm in this situation NOW, but at the front end. A new fence is needed between our house and neighbors. It is on the property line. We think it could wait a year or two. They are hell bent to do it now. We've agreed, via email, to pay X amount. So, if I just "forget" to pay for a couple of years, we can call it good? I don't agree with that idea at all.

I agreed to pay, even if I don't particularly WANT to pay. My word is my bond. I would assume, OP, that your neighbors have forgotten and would send a friendly reminder email (worded much like suggested by posters above.

 

[NFLDERS]

I thought it might be helpful to get anonymous advice from strangers...

A couple years ago I had to do some renovations to my backyard, including fencing. The only existing fencing was a long stretch that had my neighbors' fence. It was in horrible shape, and pre-dated their ownership by many, many years. I conservatively estimated just to remove and replace that stretch would cost about $2,000. I asked my neighbors if they would mind sharing the expense. I asked for $500, and they readily agreed. (They had recently replaced just the pickets on the adjacent stretch.) I made sure to match the rest of the fence, and I closely coordinated construction so their dog would not escape. The fence came out great.

A month or so after completion, the husband emailed and asked if they could pay me in a couple months, as he was starting a new job. I said sure. A couple months went by, and nothing. I know they had some rough times not too long after that--they had a car stolen, and the wife's father died. (I heard about these from others.) I did not feel like pushing them on the money.

However, I have noticed lately that they are doing major renovations to the interior of their house. I recognize the contractors, and it is all high-end. I have been to the local country club pool a couple times recently to pick up my kids from parties--I am not a member due to expense--and I have seen the wife and toddler there both times, by themselves in the baby pool. They have yard service and maid service. This is all just background and may not really be relevant. As far as myself, I am a single parent with two kids. I am not wealthy by any means, but I am comfortable. I had to take a lower paying job when I became a single parent due to scheduling, and I economized by cancelling cable, my yard service, and just basic careful budgeting. I pay for my daughter to go to a Catholic school, since the regular public schools aren't so great. My son is in the public gifted program which IS great, and I hope my daughter will be in the program next year. I do include one annual vacation in my budget, plus weekend trips to places like Orlando, which is how I came to be on these boards. This travel is really my only big discretionary expense.

I have waivered between asking them for the money and just letting it go. I would have built the fence even if they had declined to share the cost, and I can live without the $500. It is also a little sensitive, as the wife was my son's 5th grade teacher and will be my daughter's 5th grade teacher this coming year. If I do ask for it, I was thinking the best way would be to dig up the old email from the husband and reply with a polite question if they still intend to share the expense. (The email is written acknowledgement that they agreed to pay.)

Thoughts?

Sorry, JaxDad. I have to sit on the fence on this story 'cause I'm just well, not buying it. If you are not kidding, and trying to spice things up around here; Then, I'd Let It Go.

 

[mousehockey37]

I'm in this situation NOW, but at the front end. A new fence is needed between our house and neighbors. It is on the property line. We think it could wait a year or two. They are hell bent to do it now. We've agreed, via email, to pay X amount. So, if I just "forget" to pay for a couple of years, we can call it good? I don't agree with that idea at all.

I agreed to pay, even if I don't particularly WANT to pay. My word is my bond. I would assume, OP, that your neighbors have forgotten and would send a friendly reminder email (worded much like suggested by posters above.

It doesn't take much to print something out, all parties sign it, make copy, get it notarized, and you're done. It's in essence a certified contract at that point which then makes the obligation to pay a legal dealing.

 

[Kingdome8]

If you don't like the neighbor then ask. Problem is most likely you will be living together for a while. I say let it go as well.

If u ask it wil be weird going forward . It's a shame it has to be that way.

Or you could hint about fence when both in backyard about it's been a few years think we should weather coat it or something.

Rule of thumb only lend money to friends or family that u do t expect to get back

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I would let it go....

 

[ols386]

I would ask them about it again. They may have just forgotten about it, or they might hope you have forgotten. Either way, they DID agree to pay $500.

It can't hurt to ask again, in a polite manner, which I'm sure you would anyway.

 

[ols386]

Sleep with his wife.

I know you are joking, and I found it to be funny.

 

[anniemae]

I'm kinda baffled at the amount of responses that say to send an e-mail. These people are neighbors, not utility company CSR's... If the OP really wants to be serious about possibly getting this money back, I'd imagine that printing out the e-mail (if found) and going next door, ringing the bell and talking to them face-to-face is going to hold better odds.

You must admit that there are just some things that need to be done in person. This would fall into that category. If they met to discuss the fencing, then they can meet again to put closure to payment for it. If the OP goes over, shows the print out of the "terms" of their agreement, and they slam the door in her face.... Then you've learned what kind of people they really are. Sending an e-mail? Not so sure they wouldn't just delete it... if they even have that e-mail address active anymore.

I would still do it by e-mail. You would have a paper trail, put on a return receipt and you have proof they received it. Many people have trouble with face-to-face situations where it could escalate. I do not like people knocking on my door, I find it intrusive and annoying, so I would not be inclined to do it to someone else. I would e-mail, especially since OP seems kind of "on the fence" (pun intended) as to whether or not to pursue the matter.

 

[Pumbaa_]

I would ask. Why not?

They agreed and $500 can buy a heck of a lot of Mickey bars!

Oh, and to the pp about double fences? Yup. I put up a black chain link to keep my dogs in. Neighbor put up a white stockade fence. Just one side. It gives us privacy so I don't really care. Funny part, we have one of the only two story houses and have complete viewing of their backyard

They only have the illusion of privacy

 

[Westcoastwild]

I would ask. Why not?

They agreed and $500 can buy a heck of a lot of Mickey bars!

Oh, and to the pp about double fences? Yup. I put up a black chain link to keep my dogs in. Neighbor put up a white stockade fence. Just one side. It gives us privacy so I don't really care. Funny part, we have one of the only two story houses and have complete viewing of their backyard

They only have the illusion of privacy

Lol. Right. We've always had double fencing. I thought that was the norm. I don't think it's possible to put up a fence that BOTH neighbors are financially and legally responsible for. My parents neighbor tried to manipulate my parents into replacing their old fence because he thought it looked ugly. My parents couldn't afford it, and told him they didn't care. They'd tear it down and he could put up his own fence. So he "rebuilds" the fence deliberately three inches into our property past the old fence line.. My father was incensed, but my mother thought it was hilarious. She's like "what does he think we were going to do with those three inches?" And jokes on him in the end. The "privacy" fence shields him from us but not the McMansions that were built on the lot directly above us a year after the fence issue. It had been a wheat field for 20 years. Farmer sold it, developer bought it.

Fencing is expensive and I have it for the same reason you do- my very athletic escape artist canines. Otherwise I would not invest in one.

 

[Pumbaa_]

Ha! Too funny.
I actually bought my parents house. This neighborhood had no fences at all on the entire street. Felt bad putting ours up but I will never not have one. We did the black vinyl so it would be the least obtrusive

Neighbors did not think through their fence though. They have a single wide hate only. If they ever need to get a truck in the back they are in trouble.

 

[Nancyg56]

Lol. Right. We've always had double fencing. I thought that was the norm. I don't think it's possible to put up a fence that BOTH neighbors are financially and legally responsible for. My parents neighbor tried to manipulate my parents into replacing their old fence because he thought it looked ugly. My parents couldn't afford it, and told him they didn't care. They'd tear it down and he could put up his own fence. So he "rebuilds" the fence deliberately three inches into our property past the old fence line.. My father was incensed, but my mother thought it was hilarious. She's like "what does he think we were going to do with those three inches?" And jokes on him in the end. The "privacy" fence shields him from us but not the McMansions that were built on the lot directly above us a year after the fence issue. It had been a wheat field for 20 years. Farmer sold it, developer bought it.

Fencing is expensive and I have it for the same reason you do- my very athletic escape artist canines. Otherwise I would not invest in one.

You were okay that the neighbors encroached onto your property? I woudl have a huge issue with that, fence or no fence. My neighbor, the one DH abhors, actually moved our metal property marker. I was pretty peeved and after discussing this with him to no avail, I called the town to have them come and verify the line based on our documents that have been on file. The neighbor had to watch while our markers were put back where they belonged.

I am not a pill, but I can tell you that my DH can be. If this neighbor put his fence on our property I can picture my husband waiting until it was completed and then calling the zoning board to be sure he had a permit, and calling the town to verify the position, and then parking his carcass on a lawn chair while it was being taken down.

 

[Kathryn Merteuil]

 

[Westcoastwild]

You were okay that the neighbors encroached onto your property? I woudl have a huge issue with that, fence or no fence. My neighbor, the one DH abhors, actually moved our metal property marker. I was pretty peeved and after discussing this with him to no avail, I called the town to have them come and verify the line based on our documents that have been on file. The neighbor had to watch while our markers were put back where they belonged.

I am not a pill, but I can tell you that my DH can be. If this neighbor put his fence on our property I can picture my husband waiting until it was completed and then calling the zoning board to be sure he had a permit, and calling the town to verify the position, and then parking his carcass on a lawn chair while it was being taken down.

It's really rocky land and that particular side is a place where grass never grew well. One end was an old birch tree that hogged a lot of space until it got sick and died. One end is the secondary gate. Had it been the opposite side or back of the yard neighbors, likely it would have been a bigger deal. But since it was that side, the way my mother saw it was that we got a much more expensive fence than we would have ever put up ourselves for free. There was nothing wrong (functionally) with the one he wanted us to take down. He just thought it was ugly.

When my parents finally hired a landscaper a few years ago, they could fix everything except the grass issue. So they put a stone pathway in and it's still not really useable space but it prevents it from becoming a mud hole. (The backyard has never been a functioning garden or anything. It's the dogs' kingdom- can't plant poisonous stuff and can't plant nonhardy stuff.)

I get where you're coming from- that's exactly what dad wanted to do. But mom tends to only fight battles that she sees worth winning. 3 inches of mud is not a hill she wanted to die on. She pointed out to dad that if they forced the guy to take it down, she would force dad to pay for a new fence because the dogs needed the fence. Dad's cheap so he muttered and sulked for a while but backed down.

 

[DisneyOma]

You were okay that the neighbors encroached onto your property? I woudl have a huge issue with that, fence or no fence. My neighbor, the one DH abhors, actually moved our metal property marker. I was pretty peeved and after discussing this with him to no avail, I called the town to have them come and verify the line based on our documents that have been on file. The neighbor had to watch while our markers were put back where they belonged.

I am not a pill, but I can tell you that my DH can be. If this neighbor put his fence on our property I can picture my husband waiting until it was completed and then calling the zoning board to be sure he had a permit, and calling the town to verify the position, and then parking his carcass on a lawn chair while it was being taken down.

At least you could see/fix your property marker. One of ours is buried under a pile of rubble the jerk neighbor dumped on the marker - so half of the rubble is on our property. And I'm talking small 1/4 acre lot, not a lot of space to start with. Hubby doesn't care but it pisses me off. Right now there's a '"no man's land" of weeds and scruffy saplings in the contested/dump zone, so no one is trying to claim space that doesn't belong to them, but if the neighbors try to dump any more stuff, I'm getting the marker dug up, even if I have to do it myself.

 

[Kaytie]

If I do ask for it, I was thinking the best way would be to dig up the old email from the husband and reply with a polite question if they still intend to share the expense. (The email is written acknowledgement that they agreed to pay.)

I wouldn't ask if, I'd ask when. Most successful questions are open-ended, not just yes no.

 

[NFLDERS]

I wouldn't ask if, I'd ask when. Most successful questions are open-ended, not just yes no.

Agree, If you're going to ask; Maybe, with a when do you see yourself able to?

 

[Nancyg56]

It's really rocky land and that particular side is a place where grass never grew well. One end was an old birch tree that hogged a lot of space until it got sick and died. One end is the secondary gate. Had it been the opposite side or back of the yard neighbors, likely it would have been a bigger deal. But since it was that side, the way my mother saw it was that we got a much more expensive fence than we would have ever put up ourselves for free. There was nothing wrong (functionally) with the one he wanted us to take down. He just thought it was ugly.

When my parents finally hired a landscaper a few years ago, they could fix everything except the grass issue. So they put a stone pathway in and it's still not really useable space but it prevents it from becoming a mud hole. (The backyard has never been a functioning garden or anything. It's the dogs' kingdom- can't plant poisonous stuff and can't plant nonhardy stuff.)

I get where you're coming from- that's exactly what dad wanted to do. But mom tends to only fight battles that she sees worth winning. 3 inches of mud is not a hill she wanted to die on. She pointed out to dad that if they forced the guy to take it down, she would force dad to pay for a new fence because the dogs needed the fence. Dad's cheap so he muttered and sulked for a while but backed down.

LOL!! I agree, it is less expensive to keep the fence rather than argue. I am not a worryier over much but the liability if someone got hurt on the fence and it was on muy property is what would be my issue.

At least you could see/fix your property marker. One of ours is buried under a pile of rubble the jerk neighbor dumped on the marker - so half of the rubble is on our property. And I'm talking small 1/4 acre lot, not a lot of space to start with. Hubby doesn't care but it pisses me off. Right now there's a '"no man's land" of weeds and scruffy saplings in the contested/dump zone, so no one is trying to claim space that doesn't belong to them, but if the neighbors try to dump any more stuff, I'm getting the marker dug up, even if I have to do it myself.

Oh, he had it hidden pretty well but I do the gardening back there and saw that he had moved it. Tehre were actually two, one buried and then the stake that was placed there when the surveyors were here. You see, we needed a variance when we added on to our home, about 12 inches of the frame would be about 6 inches over the required 10 feet from his house, so we had teh property surveyed again at that time. Theysurveyers afixed teh marker, which was in line with the metal one that was just under it. The creep wanted to pile his wood back there so he moved it. I was pretty peeved. This is one of the many reasons Buddy would have let him have the fence installed and then laugh when he called the zoning board and town officials. I preferred to avoid that....so I took care of it before any additional unpleasantness occured.

 

[Feralpeg]

Is the fence on your property or their property? If it is on your property, it's your problem. If it is on their property and you did not get a written agreement before proceeding, it's still your problem. Look at it this way. Since the fence was in really bad shape, they could have just left it or had it demolished and you would have had to put up a new fence. Just because the fence was there, it doesn't mean they have to keep it or do anything about it. You wanted it replaced. If you didn't get payment up front or a written agreement, you are probably out of luck.

Is $500 worth creating a problem with your neighbors? What they are doing to their house has nothing to do with this issue. Sorry.