Would You Have Accepted This?

[honeywolf7]

I'm the only link between my ex's and my kids and my ex's father and stepmother since my ex is not talking to them. Today, we went to his father's house for our Christmas with them. He gave them clothes and a couple of toys each (which was fine, of course.) My son asked very loudly if they had a Christmas present for me but I shushed him very quickly (and I don't think they heard....I didn't expect anything from them.) Well, my ex-father-in-law called me into the kitchen and handed me $100 and said that they thought that I could use a little money to spend on some sort of luxury for myself more than I could use an actual present. I feel kind of funny using it for myself because of how they're connected to me and I'll probably use it on the kids, but I also felt funny even getting anything from them.....Would you have felt funny and would you have accepted it or not?

 

[DoeWDW]

I would have accepted it. You are the mother of their grandkids - the one who takes such good care of them and brings them around to see their grandparents. If it weren't for you, they would have no ties to their grandkids.

They obviously respect you and the job you're doing raising the kids and they want to help you out. I think that's sweet.

 

[honeywolf7]

For a while, I wasn't doing such a great job raising the kids (I'll be honest and say that after the separation I was putting myself first for a little while) but they have told me that they think I'm doing a wonderful job as a mother since then. I thought it was sweet, but still felt a little funny.

 

[luv2nascar]

I would have taken it only if I was comfortable with it
sometimes your stomach tells you different than that heart
put it to good use for you or you and the kids

 

[IloveDMB]

I have a suggestion:

Put it towards a trip to Disney!
It's something for you AND your kids!

 

[Buckleybunch]

I would of acceptanced.. Just because you DO deserve it.
i'm married to my dh and his mother gives me the worse gifts I have ever seen.. So I would feel honored in your case.

Good luck

Linda

 

[C.Ann]

I think it's safe to say that most people today wouldn't hand $100 to someone they had no respect for - or didn't like..

So - yes, I would have graciously accepted it - and I think the idea of putting it towards a trip to Disney for you AND the kids is a great idea!!

 

[Rajah]

How about spend it on something you and the kids can enjoy together?

 

[rae519]

As I once told my mother, just say "thanks"!

IF you are given a gift for yourself, then use it for yourself. You have to take care of YOU before you can take care of anyone else - so get rid of the guilt and just get yourself something nice and enjoy!!!

Hugs!

Rae

 

[DebbieB]

My brother has been divorced for over 4 years now, he has a 9 year old son. The divorce was really nasty and things got worse this year when she took him to court for more child support. My Mom always got her Estee Lauder perfume for Christmas. The year after they separated, the ex sent a gift over with her son for my mom and we had to run out and get the perfume for her right before the store closed on Christmas Eve. My brother is remarrying next month, my mom didn't know if she should still get her the perfume since we have not seen her since the divorce and my brother is barely speaking to her (except to talk about their son). I told her to get it, she will be the better person in the situation even if she doesn't get anything in return. Good thing she did - the ex sent over a $50 Visa Gift Card for my mom with her son on Christmas Eve. So no matter the situation between the ex's, it's best to keep on good terms with the former in-laws, they are your children's grandparents.