Worst Excuses When Caught Cheating

underdesea

Crazee Cat Ladee
Joined
Jul 8, 2004
Messages
299
OK, so the Tiger Woods story and the now-infamous voice-mail-message-to-mistress got me thinking about my own dating history, and a particular ex who came up with some very creative ways to explain away evidence of his cheating. I'm wondering, for those of you who have been in a relationship with someone who cheated, what is the worst explanation you received when he/she was "caught?"

For example, long ago, when I was dating, I was in a supposedly exclusive long-distance relationship (I know, that was a difficult one to start with). My boyfriend was visiting me, and I was looking for something in his briefcase -- don't remember what now, because instead of what I was looking for, I found a business card from an exotic dancer (who knew they had business cards?). When I confronted him, he said it was from someone he knew who wanted to get into his line of work, and he was "consulting" with her. Uh huh.

I was young and stupid then, so I more or less accepted his explanation. Flash Forward (yeah, I love the show) to a weekend visit in his state. I was unpacking and opened up one of his bureau drawers to put in my stuff. What do I find but a pair of women's underwear. Again, confront. He tells me they were "wrapping from a gag gift from a friend of his." Again, huh.

So, just wondering if anyone else ever got a really bad excuse when finding really incriminating evidence involving a significant other?
 
OK, so the Tiger Woods story and the now-infamous voice-mail-message-to-mistress got me thinking about my own dating history, and a particular ex who came up with some very creative ways to explain away evidence of his cheating. I'm wondering, for those of you who have been in a relationship with someone who cheated, what is the worst explanation you received when he/she was "caught?"

For example, long ago, when I was dating, I was in a supposedly exclusive long-distance relationship (I know, that was a difficult one to start with). My boyfriend was visiting me, and I was looking for something in his briefcase -- don't remember what now, because instead of what I was looking for, I found a business card from an exotic dancer (who knew they had business cards?). When I confronted him, he said it was from someone he knew who wanted to get into his line of work, and he was "consulting" with her. Uh huh.

I was young and stupid then, so I more or less accepted his explanation. Flash Forward (yeah, I love the show) to a weekend visit in his state. I was unpacking and opened up one of his bureau drawers to put in my stuff. What do I find but a pair of women's underwear. Again, confront. He tells me they were "wrapping from a gag gift from a friend of his." Again, huh.

So, just wondering if anyone else ever got a really bad excuse when finding really incriminating evidence involving a significant other?
sounds to me like you are a snoop. what business did you have in his briefcase or his dresser drawers.
 
Best friend with my g/f (now ex, obviously). The excuse the friend gave me, "if it wasn't me, it would have been someone else". Like I should be thankful.

Why, thank you. I so appreciate you looking out for my well-being by taking on that role. People are so stupid.
 
A friend's h was always getting mixed up in suspicious situations with a female coworker, but he always managed to finagle his way out of them. It was like he had the world's worst luck, since situations alwyas looked incriminating. OR he was actually cheating. Anyway, my friend flew down to 'suprise" him during a business trip. The hotel allowed her into the room, since she said she was the wife. She found the female coworker's stuff spread out- toiletry bag on the bathroom counter, products out, etc. The excuse? Well, she had been at another hotel but did not like it and moved over to this one, only a room wouldn't be ready for her until later in the day. Her stuff was out because she was freshening up. Okay...
 

Best friend with my g/f (now ex, obviously). The excuse the friend gave me, "if it wasn't me, it would have been someone else". Like I should be thankful.

Why, thank you. I so appreciate you looking out for my well-being by taking on that role. People are so stupid.[/QUOTE]

LOL! Exactly!
 
sounds to me like you are a snoop. what business did you have in his briefcase or his dresser drawers.

A pen? His flight itinerary? could've been anything. She also said she was putting her clothes away in his drawers while unpacking. But let's not get off track here....

My ex got caught in a lie about his whereabouts on New Year's Eve. I had been working until 1am, he was supposed to have dinner at his brother's house and then go home. I called his brother's house around 10pm to say early Happy New Year to everyone but his brother told me he had already gone home. I called our home and he didn't answer...I tried again at 11pm...again at 12:30am....and one last time at 1am before leaving work. He never answered the phone. I drive home, and he's not there. I pack my suitcase, already planning to leave his sorry butt, and head to my parents house. At about 2:30 am he pages me from our home number. I call him and he gives me grief about why I'm not home from work yet, so I tell him I'm at my parents house (they were having a NYE party and I wanted to catch the tail end). I ask him how his evening was and he says "boring...had dinner at brother's house and then went home and went to bed."

Oh REALLY?

I then laundry list my attempts to call him at home all night, in addition to my stopping by the apartment to find him not home and tell him again "So where were you last night?"

He says He "bumped into some friends on the way home and went out to hang out with them."

I tell him why should I believe that, since his very first instinct was to lie to me about what he'd done all night? If he'd just hung out with some buddies, why did he lie to me about it with the "I went straight home to bed" crap.

So he said he blacked out on the way home and doesn't remember where he went.

I divorced him immediately. One of the best days of my life.
 
Okay, this is a quote from a movie most people probably never saw. It was Intolerable Cruelty with Catherine Zeta Jones and George Clooney. In the movie Catherine was purposely marrying men that would cheat, that way she could take them to the cleaners in court. This scene is in a courtroom where they are arguing about her latest husband's infidelities. Heinz, the Baron Krauss von Espy says this about the situation - "She spe-cif-i-cated a man with a wandering pee-pee. How you say?" While saying this he was wiggling his index finger to illustrate the wandering pee-pee. It was hysterical. So, there's a lame cheating excuse - the wandering pee-pee.
 
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My cousin boyfriend told her that It's a was a complete stranger and not one of her friends so someone how in his mind that made it all better:confused3:confused3:confused3
 
This is just a funny a dating story- not a marriage...

I met a guy on an online dating site, things were going great and we were spending a lot of time together. One day he said he was going to a concert with a guy friend. I said "great!", I felt bad he hadn't seen his friends in a while. I asked him what concert and he couldn't answer and immediately sounded like he was lying. So that night I looked at the online personal ads, he loved the beach and jet ski's, there was a recent ad and the person's screen name was "JetSkiBeach". When I talked to him the next day I said I can't wait until it gets warm so we can Jet Ski at the Beach. He immediately knew he was BUSTED! :rotfl2: Not so smart when he happened to be a surgeon! LOL
 
Is that really what you get out of the story? That she was being a snoop? If you are in a relationship you shouldn't have things like that around anyways...If privacy is so important to a person they should either just be single or not give thier partner reasons to "snoop" in the first place.:rolleyes1
sounds to me like you are a snoop. what business did you have in his briefcase or his dresser drawers.
 





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