Won't let DD do BBB---Am I the only one?

[Mama Who]

Just a few quick questions!......

Do you not allow your child to have Facepaints on either? I.E like the Butterfly princesses or the queen of hearts make-up that can be done at the Paint shop in toontown,or any other type of fancy dress Facepaint at like partys or Halloween???
OR
If your daughter was to do a dance show(If she danced for example) because of lighting and overall effect to enhance the costume,say for example your daughter was to be a cat,or bunny rabbit in her school play for Easter........
Im just curious,Also just a quick one to add in Coming from the UK and seeing your use of words,like Tricked Up.Painted up etc I would have fully thought what other people did! that you was refering to the terms of a Street walker Lady of the night what ever you want to call them,
Just wondering how many others may have thought the same thing if it hadnt of been for reading the whole thread! I was quite shocked at 1st to see other peoples Daughters to be described like this,Obviously if this is what people say in the US to describe other meanings of decorated then wow Im pleased we dont use those definitions over here I would not like to describe a child in that way as it sounds quite harsh to be honest........Anyways i just thought that i would let you know that their might be other people out there that dont quite understand your take on the TRICKED UP....PAINTED UP, and may have found that a little out of place on here, and you could maybe explain that meaning after you have said the word so you dont get the Backlash you have gotten!

You've asked questions I've already answered. I will not continue to repeat myself. I invite you to go read the thread from page one. I invite you to look carefully at my first post. I invite you to look at exactly who introduced language like "streetwalker," who got hostile about people saying they wouldn't do what she did and who accused other people of having "sexual hangups." It will be illuminating.

I am certain there will now be wild hysterics and accusations that I've called someone's child something. I'm sure it's all part of my "sexual hangup" or something.

 

[princessmom29]

You've asked questions I've already answered. I will not continue to repeat myself. I invite you to go read the thread from page one. I invite you to look carefully at my first post. I invite you to look at exactly who introduced language like "streetwalker," who got hostile about people saying they wouldn't do what she did and who accused other people of having "sexual hangups." It will be illuminating.

I am certain there will now be wild hysterics and accusations that I've called someone's child something. I'm sure it's all part of my "sexual hangup" or something.

OK, this is the second itme you have brought up the fact that i used the word streetwalker as some kind of justifaction for what you said about CHILDREN. What I said was that girls form the BBB DO NOT look like stretwalkers. VERY,VERY different than calling them "painted up" or "tricked out" as you did. Sorry, but you cannot blame your words on me. And for the record. I have no problems with people who say they won't doo BB wo don't try to judge others for doing so. My problem comes in when you star throwing terms like poainted up" around to descibe other people's children.

The fat that you continue to attack anyone that agrees with me, and I have said numerous times that I have no problem with those who choose differently than I should say something. YOU are the ONLY person here I have a problem with, and it has nothing to do with what you choose to do with your children, and everything to do with what you choose to say about other people's children.

 

[KathyTX]

Please talk about the topic and avoid making personal jabs or attacks toward other posters.

If another poster pushes your buttons, put them on your IGNORE list rather than engaging in arguments with them.

Thanks!

 

[brookmey]

OP here. I stepped away for a few days because I found myself engaging in a difference of opinion that I never should've let myself do. My original intent in starting this thread was to find out in a lighthearted, joking kind of way (being a "mean" mom) if any other parents feel the same as I do about BBB. We hear so much about it and it just seems like everyone lets their daughters do it, so I was curious about those of us in the minority. But, WOW, this topic really took off in a whole new direction!

For the most part I think the girls that you are seeing that are REALLY made up were not from BBB but rather done at home.

I don't think you're mean if you don't let her do it, but if she really wants to and it's in your budget than I would look at the actual people coming out of BBB and not people walking down the street that you think are.

It's quite possible that these are the girls I saw, ones whose makeup was enhanced by someone else after they left BBB or done at home. The problem with that is how are we to know if that was done by BBB or someone else if the hairstyles are the same?

DD will be fine if she doesn't do BBB. It's not something she talks about all the time at home or at Disney. She talks about seeing the characters more than BBB. I think this time it was just a situation of "my best friend just did it so I want to, too." DD has never said a word about getting her ears pierced, but now she's talking about it because her best friend got that done, too. She'll move onto something else tomorrow.

I respect the opinions of parents who allow BBB and those who don't. It's just a difference in parenting styles. I have seen some sweet, precious looking BBB little princesses and I think they are adorable and not "grown up" looking at all. If the parent doesn't allow BBB there are plenty of other treats at Disney.

Thank you for your understanding!

I am sure that if your dd has her heart set on doing BBB, they could just give her a cute hair do and forgo the makeup at your request! BBB is a great experience so why let her miss it if she really wants to do it!

If we're just going to do a cute hairstyle with no makeup, I'm not going to spend all the $$$ at BBB. DD is an eternal optimist and can find the bright side in anything. She will not be scarred for life if I don't let her do BBB. I'll take her to HBS to get her hair done and knowing her, she'll have the time of her life there. She can have her princess moment on her wedding day.

That said there was a style a few years ago - I don't know if they have it now or not that had a lot of eye shadow (blue), liner, lipstick and multi-colored hair extensions. I took a picture of my dd who was only 3 at the time staring at her and asking why she was dressed like that. To me she looked like a 16 year old that is rebelling - it was absolutely not flattering on a 6-7 year old child and I was in disbelief that a parent would allow it.

That's the kind of makeup I saw that cemented my decision to not let DD do it. And this was in March 2010!

 

[dntd]

I'd let DD do BBB.. But, I wouldn't let her do a hair piece.. and it would have to be lip gloss/lip stick.. that's it. (plus sparkles!) ...

And why not a hair piece? We have had on this thread about how makeup i for adults, these hair pieces are for sure kids what adult goes around in coloured hair pieces?IDK it's dress up like at halloween.

 

[brymolmom]

OP - I'm with you but not only because of the makeup...I have occassionally let my dd7 play dress up with her friends with some makeup. So I'm not totally against it for play only.

But I think BBB and many other things for kids today are TOO MUCH. So many posts on here asking how to make their WDW trip special for their girl (or boys who are apparently neglected because there aren't any boy specific meals) and it is just...They're in WDW - back in my day that is the MOST SPECIAL THING OF ALL.

So I don't get all the $$$ to do uncomfortable hair and outfit (especially in the summer heat when the girls look miserable in the dress after a couple of hours). I guess if dd begged for it, maybe I would let her ask for gift cards from grandparents as her birthday gift or something. But I don't think I would ever shell out money for it.

I also know it's just vacation...but I have a girlfriend with a 12-ish year old girl and she was just saying at a get together how her dd just went to get her nails done. I just think starting all these 'primping' things so young sets a bad precedent. These people aren't rich and the last thing they need is to pay for monthly nail appointments for their 12 year old.

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

OP here. I stepped away for a few days because I found myself engaging in a difference of opinion that I never should've let myself do. My original intent in starting this thread was to find out in a lighthearted, joking kind of way (being a "mean" mom) if any other parents feel the same as I do about BBB. We hear so much about it and it just seems like everyone lets their daughters do it, so I was curious about those of us in the minority. But, WOW, this topic really took off in a whole new direction!

But OP when I read your OP, to me it wasn't lighthearted at all in my eyes. It read I won't let my 7 yo wear make-up in public because its not age appropriate. I don't want my 7 yo to look like a teenager.

Sorry but that implied to me thatthose of us who pay for our daughters to do BBB somehow think its OK for our daughters to wear heavy make-up and look like teenagers. If you wanted this thread to be joking and lighthearted, there could have been other ways to post it.

I originally responded because I felt offended .

In my eyes, 1 day of light make-up (which has always been my experience at BBB) and pink hair will not make my 7 yo daughter start acting like a teenager from now on. She dances , and believe me is required to wear tons more make-up during competitions and recitals.

Some of the posters said very derogatory things about little girls and it was very uncalled for and now are trying to backpeddle.

Alot talk about the money. Yes, it does cost alot for a hairstyle . But we go to WDW with a big budget. I know lots of people don't. And in the grand scheme of things to spend $55.00 on something for my DD to enjoy is not a big deal to DH and I. I understand for some $55.00 would break the bank and is not in the budget. That I understand, or if their daughters aren't into it or if the parents just totally disagree. But to say, little girls act like this , or will be this or grow up to be this, because of 1 day of fake hair and make-up at BBB is ridiculous.

Its not that the parents disagree with what I chose to do with my daughter. It doesn't bother me. My kids have a TV in their room. My friend thinks thats horrible and her kids do not. We agree to disagree.

But when the name calling and better than thou attitude start , thats a whole different story.

OP you may have not meant your post to come off the way it did and in other peoples eyes it may not have, but I 'm just saying how I took it.

 

[Colleen27]

But I think BBB and many other things for kids today are TOO MUCH. So many posts on here asking how to make their WDW trip special for their girl (or boys who are apparently neglected because there aren't any boy specific meals) and it is just...They're in WDW - back in my day that is the MOST SPECIAL THING OF ALL.

But that doesn't mean there's anything wrong with the little add-ons, any more than there is with spending extra on shopping, character meals, or anything else Disney offers. In the big picture, $45 on a makeover (we did the lower package because we don't do Disney-brand dresses; we brought our own Aurora dress) is a drop in the bucket, especially for a family like mine that doesn't really shop. I'm sure plenty of people - I'd even guess most - spend more than that on souvenirs per child on a Disney vacation, but my kids are more into the experiences than the merchandise.

 

[princessmom29]

But OP when I read your OP, to me it wasn't lighthearted at all in my eyes. It read I won't let my 7 yo wear make-up in public because its not age appropriate. I don't want my 7 yo to look like a teenager.

Sorry but that implied to me thatthose of us who pay for our daughters to do BBB somehow think its OK for our daughters to wear heavy make-up and look like teenagers. If you wanted this thread to be joking and lighthearted, there could have been other ways to post it.

I originally responded because I felt offended .

In my eyes, 1 day of light make-up (which has always been my experience at BBB) and pink hair will not make my 7 yo daughter start acting like a teenager from now on. She dances , and believe me is required to wear tons more make-up during competitions and recitals.

Some of the posters said very derogatory things about little girls and it was very uncalled for and now are trying to backpeddle.

Alot talk about the money. Yes, it does cost alot for a hairstyle . But we go to WDW with a big budget. I know lots of people don't. And in the grand scheme of things to spend $55.00 on something for my DD to enjoy is not a big deal to DH and I. I understand for some $55.00 would break the bank and is not in the budget. That I understand, or if their daughters aren't into it or if the parents just totally disagree. But to say, little girls act like this , or will be this or grow up to be this, because of 1 day of fake hair and make-up at BBB is ridiculous.

Its not that the parents disagree with what I chose to do with my daughter. It doesn't bother me. My kids have a TV in their room. My friend thinks thats horrible and her kids do not. We agree to disagree.

But when the name calling and better than thou attitude start , thats a whole different story.

OP you may have not meant your post to come off the way it did and in other peoples eyes it may not have, but I 'm just saying how I took it.

this is also the way I was reading it.

 

[maxiesmom]

this is also the way I was reading it.

Me as well.

 

[princessmom29]

It's quite possible that these are the girls I saw, ones whose makeup was enhanced by someone else after they left BBB or done at home. The problem with that is how are we to know if that was done by BBB or someone else if the hairstyles are the same?



That's the kind of makeup I saw that cemented my decision to not let DD do it. And this was in March 2010!

As seceral of us have said, they don't do any liner or dark makup at the BBB. The pictures you have seen here are typical of what they do, and i will add mine of DD in November:

I think she looks very sweet, and not too made up at all. The blush looks a little heavy, but she was really red from her excema on this day already, and the FGIT did the best she colud to blend it. This is her "reveal" photo, and i think the look on her face says it all about why this experinece is totally worth it for us.

 

[brymolmom]

But that doesn't mean there's anything wrong with the little add-ons, any more than there is with spending extra on shopping, character meals, or anything else Disney offers. In the big picture, $45 on a makeover (we did the lower package because we don't do Disney-brand dresses; we brought our own Aurora dress) is a drop in the bucket, especially for a family like mine that doesn't really shop. I'm sure plenty of people - I'd even guess most - spend more than that on souvenirs per child on a Disney vacation, but my kids are more into the experiences than the merchandise.

I didn't say there was anything wrong with it...I just think that society in general today and especially the younger ones today have way too much sense of entitlement. And I think things like BBB can perpetuate that sense. I know so many kids/teenagers who "demand" that their parents pay for the 'cool' phone (and even funnier is when they don't really do any demanding, the parent simply thinks it's their responsibility to supply it for child), or expect to get 'special' treatment all the time. Like I said, I really have no trouble with it for vacation only (although I can think of way more fun things to spend money on), but I do think that this type of thing can be part of a greater direction to lead my dd, where I don't want to lead her. So it definitely isn't for us. But kudos to WDW for finding such a great money maker for them.

 

[GinnyEmma]

Princessmom, you have an adorable daughter.

I've seen some little girls done up and looking totally trashy. I've seen some with thir hair pulling to the point if affecting their little eyes, and I've seen far far more looking like little princesses. Maybe it depends in the dairy godmother.

If I had little girls I'd probably pass because I am one of those people who thinks girls are pretty without a bunch a extras.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

We never let our DD do it either. To be honest, I'm not sure when BBB even opened to know if DD was young enough for it. We didn't keep her from doing it from any other reason than it being a waste of time that could be spent on rides.

 

[maxiesmom]

We never let our DD do it either. To be honest, I'm not sure when BBB even opened to know if DD was young enough for it. We didn't keep her from doing it from any other reason than it being a waste of time that could be spent on rides.

For me, seeing my niece's face light up when I told her we were doing BBB was more special than any ride could be! She really enjoyed the whole experience and that day was full of great memories. She really loved it.

It also helped that we were doing a long stay at WDW that time, so we didn't feel pressure to go go go go that trip.

 

[princessmom29]

Princessmom, you have an adorable daughter.

I've seen some little girls done up and looking totally trashy. I've seen some with thir hair pulling to the point if affecting their little eyes, and I've seen far far more looking like little princesses. Maybe it depends in the dairy godmother.

If I had little girls I'd probably pass because I am one of those people who thinks girls are pretty without a bunch a extras.

Thanks so much!!

I think in some cases it has to do with how involved parents are in the process as well, and in giving a little guidance without completely taknig over. DD and I discussed before the appointment what to expect, and I didn't choose for her, but helped guide her choices toward colors that matched the outfit, ect. I am not a big fan of the hair extensions and DD knows this. I wouldn't have forbid her from getting them if it is what she really wanted, but I did tell her I didn't think they looked as pretty as the bun, and that blue eyeshadow didn't go with her dress. She got the blue the year before with her Cindy dress, however and it was really pretty.

I think you are right that girls are pretty without the extras, and most of the time we are no frills kind of girls, but DD really enjoys the experience of bieng pampered. She really likes going to the salon at home to get her hair cut as well. I HATED it at that age. If she didn't love it I certianly wouldn't push her to have it done.

 

[Colleen27]

I didn't say there was anything wrong with it...I just think that society in general today and especially the younger ones today have way too much sense of entitlement. And I think things like BBB can perpetuate that sense. I know so many kids/teenagers who "demand" that their parents pay for the 'cool' phone (and even funnier is when they don't really do any demanding, the parent simply thinks it's their responsibility to supply it for child), or expect to get 'special' treatment all the time. Like I said, I really have no trouble with it for vacation only (although I can think of way more fun things to spend money on), but I do think that this type of thing can be part of a greater direction to lead my dd, where I don't want to lead her. So it definitely isn't for us. But kudos to WDW for finding such a great money maker for them.

Attitude is everything when it comes to that, though. Extras can lead to expectations. So can frequent pricey vacations for that matter. But they don't have to. If I ever see it getting to be an issue with my kids we'll nip it in the bud, but so far so good. At this point they're very grateful and know how lucky they are (having friends who have lost homes to foreclosure, had to move away, etc puts a lot in perspective ), and they know it isn't an all-the-time thing. But maybe the way we live at home balances it out, because we have a very simple small-town lifestyle without a lot of extras in the day-to-day. To go with your example, even I don't have a "cool" phone and my teen is content with his $20 cheapie. That's part of why doing the special extras on vacation is so much fun!

 

[JUJU814]

I agree - It's not like the kid is going onto one of those child molester buffets (Kid's beauty pageants). It's just dress-up. My kid has gone to BBB at 6, 7, and will go again this year. They make her up each time. We go over to the "photo studio" across from the castle and they do a shoot of her there. It's just fun, and at the end of the day it gets washed away.

I have to agree. The hotel we stayed at last weekend in Orlando had one of those beauty pageants being held there and all I can say is OY! YIKES!! There was nothing at all cute about it.

BBB doesn't even begin to compare to something like that. We choose not to do BBB for a variety of reasons (including that I don't care for the look for my child), but I can definitely see how some little girls who are girly girls think it is fun!

 

[Laurabearz]

I wont let my DD's do BBB because it's too darn expensive and a pain in the but to wash all the glitter out of their hair...

With that said, I think the princesses that do get to go look very cute, and appropriate.

Now, if they were done up that way everyday at school, we might talk about their parents behind their backs....

 

[SallySkelington]

Answering the original post, no I won't let DD do BBB either. She's 5 years old. I don't let her play with make-up at home either. I have no issues with other people doing it with their kids. (Like I have no problems with other little girls playing with Barbies and we are a Barbie-free household). I don't want to push the idea that make-up would make her look better. Getting a butterfly pain painted on her face is different - I'm pretty sure there aren't teens who think getting their face painted is needed to enhance their looks. But adult make-up is a whole different story. The princess culture bothers me a bit as well unless it's a princess who is strong and powerful and actually does something other than look pretty. And don't understand why make-up means looking better in kids and young teens. (And even many older teens and some adults).

I agree with this full heartedly. I wasn't really allowed to wear makeup (with few exceptions like holidays, and I was never much of a girly girl anyway) until I was older, around 14 or so, even then I was only slowly introduced to it. My younger step sister on my dads side was allowed to play in those little "fake" make ups when she was younger (3 and up) and she has to wear it every where all the time (outside of school) or else she doesn't "look pretty". She's surprisingly conscience of how she looks and she's already asking for "real" makeup. She's only 9.

I think its understandable when its dress up and all to play the part but if it insinuates that a child isn't beautiful the way they are I don't think thats right. But not every child thinks like that and my little sister played in play makeup for years while watching her mom on a daily basis. I mean it's only one day so why not let her have a special experience before she gets too old for it? I don't think letting a child go to BBB is a bad thing, I would go myself if I wasn't too old. Just beware the hair loss issues as of late, which usually comes from leaving a child's hair up for too long in a tight up-do. Nasty.