gopherit
I'm not in the book, you know.
- Joined
- Sep 21, 2003
- Messages
- 1,327
Just got back this week from a visit with the familial units (DH's side, anyhooo). The trip was 1 week in duration, and we visited with FIL and MIL, plus BIL, SIL and our 2 nephews and new niece. Our trip included days on the beach, evenings on the boardwalk... my 2 ds got to go to a Phillies vs. Braves game in Philly where they sang happy b'day to my son (it was his 9th bday that night) and each boy actually got a ball at batting practice before the game (and later got it signed by former Phillie Grag Lemanski)... I shopped in the outlets, we all had some great food, played mini-golf and all that vacationy stuff...
But any way ya slice it, going home is simply not the same as going "home".
(1) For all the talk of rude guests at WDW and the demise of humanity, I still feel like folks are nicer on a Disney vacation than most any other place in the world! The rude dogs that go to WDW must be positively postal in their natural habitats... and I swear I think a good portion of them were loose on the Delaware roads by day and beach / boardwalk by night.
(2) When I stay with family, I always have that feeling that I'm making effort for someone. And I feel awkward trying to find someway to reciprocate -- ok I'll clean the bath after my kids, but where do you keep your cleaning stuff? Is there a particular product I should use? How about groceries -- can I get some things for you, and if I do, will there be enough room in your fridge to store them? Ok if I use your washer? Can she have some of this, or were you saving it? In short -- We are no longer in control of our destiny -- even our dining options, for example, were pretty much pre-determined (like having all your PS already made, haha!) And my kids felt like every where they went, they were intruding on someone else's pre-claimed "turf" (their cousins' room, their toys, their pool, their house, their gamecube, their grandparents, yada yada so forth...). Nothing was neutral ground, from their perspective!
(3) Stuff to do. The kids got restless. Everything required getting in a car and driving (in some wicked traffic, no less). My son wanted to know if the rides on the boardwalk had fast passes.
The kids got some pizza and a funnel cake one night, and some great salt water taffy, but honestly, the prices were right up there with anything you'd see in the magic kingdom. Fourth of July fireworks don't hold a candle to Wishes or Illuminations. And lots of things seemed like lesser "subs" for WDW to our kids (for example, a water park was dubbed as a "MINI Blizzard Beach..." or a ride at Funland was called "a really tame version of Tower of Terror"... and so forth.) The wide variety of activities at WDW, for example, and the easy (mindless!) transportation to get to them really spoils you for anything else, especially when you're on vacation and looking for fun.
(4) Mom gets testy. (Mom meaning me, not my own mom or MIL!) It's true. After Day 4 with family, I start to get chafed around the edges. Not sure why, but the best reason I can arrive at is that I just can't handle the lack of control and also to a real degree, claustrophobia. Usually when you crash with family, you make concessions that, because you are the "guest", you accept despite the fact that in a saner, self-controlled situation you would instantly say, "Houston, we've got a problem" and proceed to fix it. Such as sleeping an entire family of 5 in one room (Yes we did that -- in my DH's old boyhood br that was certainly far smaller than any DVC villa, with a double bed, a kiddie bed, and a crib jammed in there -- cozy, you say -- NOT.) Or you're given an air mattress that catapaults you off onto the floor every time your partner so much as sighs. An unrested mommy is one seriously edgy mommy -- and folks, it ain't pretty.
(5) It's not the fam's fault. I don't want you to think, ok, so HER family isn't anything like a trip to WDW -- well maybe she has the fam from Down Under (and you DON'T mean Australia.) No, on the contrary, on both sides we have been blessed with nice people, good people, make that GREAT people... people we care about and who also care about us. But we are all people (us included) and we all have our likes/dislikes, our way of dealing with things, our own relationship styles, our quirks and peculiarities...you name it. My "get-along quotient" is simply much higher on neutral ground! I think it's because on the neutral turf outside of any one person's home, it's a level field, you do what you want, and you don't feel like you are impositioning anyone if you want beef instead of chicken, and no one kid rules the roost, and there's plenty of options and no need to choose for anyone but yourselves, if so desired, or you can bend to the masses if ya crave that groupie feelin'.
We will be going to HHI in a few weeks. Just us 5 chickens -- DH, me, and our 3 kids. I don't really consider last week to be a vacation -- as I have said countless times before, it's more like a 7-day leg on a Tour for World Peace amongst our families. I guess we will do Leg 2 of that tour when we drive down to HHI (stopping at my mom's house for 2 nights). Then we will have the week to ourselves in HHI. I am really curious to see how that week of together time will compare to our "week at the beach" amongst family. Should be interesting. Understand that I love our families, but we are always put in the postion of using our vacation time to visit them. No one comes west for us -- we're too "out of the way". My ds questioned my MIL about this on Day 5 -- he asked, "Why don't you ever come visit us?" MIL explained that she simply can't travel very far due to her health. So DS digest this, thinks and then says, "Well, why can't my Aunt and Uncle come visit us? They can travel -- tHey visited with us the last 2 times we went to Disney!" MIL says, "Oh, they can't travel now! They have 3 small kids -- it would be much too difficult for them!" Hmmm. We've been making that same difficult trip, 8 hrs over, 8 hrs back, every year now, usually twice a year, for the past 15 yrs of our marriage, during which our 3 kids were born. We have traveled with as young as a 6 week old (twice -- 2 different kids!) One trip, it was a 5 yr old, a nearly 4 yr old and a 6 wk old baby. Can't travel our way because of 3 young kids? Yeah, I guess those miles are real killers, what with going East-West, AGAINST the jet stream....
(I know, I'm being catty -- but hey, it was Day 5 -- I can't be responsible for my thoughts or actions! Maybe we can do the trips 'cuz we're just stronger "stock" than they are, eh?)
In short.... Wolfe said you can't go home again.
I say it depends upon the "home" !
But any way ya slice it, going home is simply not the same as going "home".
(1) For all the talk of rude guests at WDW and the demise of humanity, I still feel like folks are nicer on a Disney vacation than most any other place in the world! The rude dogs that go to WDW must be positively postal in their natural habitats... and I swear I think a good portion of them were loose on the Delaware roads by day and beach / boardwalk by night.
(2) When I stay with family, I always have that feeling that I'm making effort for someone. And I feel awkward trying to find someway to reciprocate -- ok I'll clean the bath after my kids, but where do you keep your cleaning stuff? Is there a particular product I should use? How about groceries -- can I get some things for you, and if I do, will there be enough room in your fridge to store them? Ok if I use your washer? Can she have some of this, or were you saving it? In short -- We are no longer in control of our destiny -- even our dining options, for example, were pretty much pre-determined (like having all your PS already made, haha!) And my kids felt like every where they went, they were intruding on someone else's pre-claimed "turf" (their cousins' room, their toys, their pool, their house, their gamecube, their grandparents, yada yada so forth...). Nothing was neutral ground, from their perspective!
(3) Stuff to do. The kids got restless. Everything required getting in a car and driving (in some wicked traffic, no less). My son wanted to know if the rides on the boardwalk had fast passes.
The kids got some pizza and a funnel cake one night, and some great salt water taffy, but honestly, the prices were right up there with anything you'd see in the magic kingdom. Fourth of July fireworks don't hold a candle to Wishes or Illuminations. And lots of things seemed like lesser "subs" for WDW to our kids (for example, a water park was dubbed as a "MINI Blizzard Beach..." or a ride at Funland was called "a really tame version of Tower of Terror"... and so forth.) The wide variety of activities at WDW, for example, and the easy (mindless!) transportation to get to them really spoils you for anything else, especially when you're on vacation and looking for fun. (4) Mom gets testy. (Mom meaning me, not my own mom or MIL!) It's true. After Day 4 with family, I start to get chafed around the edges. Not sure why, but the best reason I can arrive at is that I just can't handle the lack of control and also to a real degree, claustrophobia. Usually when you crash with family, you make concessions that, because you are the "guest", you accept despite the fact that in a saner, self-controlled situation you would instantly say, "Houston, we've got a problem" and proceed to fix it. Such as sleeping an entire family of 5 in one room (Yes we did that -- in my DH's old boyhood br that was certainly far smaller than any DVC villa, with a double bed, a kiddie bed, and a crib jammed in there -- cozy, you say -- NOT.) Or you're given an air mattress that catapaults you off onto the floor every time your partner so much as sighs. An unrested mommy is one seriously edgy mommy -- and folks, it ain't pretty.
(5) It's not the fam's fault. I don't want you to think, ok, so HER family isn't anything like a trip to WDW -- well maybe she has the fam from Down Under (and you DON'T mean Australia.) No, on the contrary, on both sides we have been blessed with nice people, good people, make that GREAT people... people we care about and who also care about us. But we are all people (us included) and we all have our likes/dislikes, our way of dealing with things, our own relationship styles, our quirks and peculiarities...you name it. My "get-along quotient" is simply much higher on neutral ground! I think it's because on the neutral turf outside of any one person's home, it's a level field, you do what you want, and you don't feel like you are impositioning anyone if you want beef instead of chicken, and no one kid rules the roost, and there's plenty of options and no need to choose for anyone but yourselves, if so desired, or you can bend to the masses if ya crave that groupie feelin'.
We will be going to HHI in a few weeks. Just us 5 chickens -- DH, me, and our 3 kids. I don't really consider last week to be a vacation -- as I have said countless times before, it's more like a 7-day leg on a Tour for World Peace amongst our families. I guess we will do Leg 2 of that tour when we drive down to HHI (stopping at my mom's house for 2 nights). Then we will have the week to ourselves in HHI. I am really curious to see how that week of together time will compare to our "week at the beach" amongst family. Should be interesting. Understand that I love our families, but we are always put in the postion of using our vacation time to visit them. No one comes west for us -- we're too "out of the way". My ds questioned my MIL about this on Day 5 -- he asked, "Why don't you ever come visit us?" MIL explained that she simply can't travel very far due to her health. So DS digest this, thinks and then says, "Well, why can't my Aunt and Uncle come visit us? They can travel -- tHey visited with us the last 2 times we went to Disney!" MIL says, "Oh, they can't travel now! They have 3 small kids -- it would be much too difficult for them!" Hmmm. We've been making that same difficult trip, 8 hrs over, 8 hrs back, every year now, usually twice a year, for the past 15 yrs of our marriage, during which our 3 kids were born. We have traveled with as young as a 6 week old (twice -- 2 different kids!) One trip, it was a 5 yr old, a nearly 4 yr old and a 6 wk old baby. Can't travel our way because of 3 young kids? Yeah, I guess those miles are real killers, what with going East-West, AGAINST the jet stream....
(I know, I'm being catty -- but hey, it was Day 5 -- I can't be responsible for my thoughts or actions! Maybe we can do the trips 'cuz we're just stronger "stock" than they are, eh?)
In short.... Wolfe said you can't go home again.
I say it depends upon the "home" !
