What to send for a funeral--need suggestions

[disneyfanatic60]

My bosses father-in-law passed away on Saturday and we just found out this morning. We are trying to think of something to send from the office. I don't want to offend anyone, so I'm trying to find the right way to question this. I'll apolgize in advance..... My bosses family is of the Jewish faith. They had a Memorial Service today. They are greeting visitors and friends this evening and tomorrow evening. We would like to collectively send something to the family. It's just him and his wife. His children are in town but will be leaving later this evening. We thought about a fruit basket, but my boss and his wife leave for Los Angeles on Thursday afternoon for the weekend to attend a wedding.

Does anyone have any other suggestions? I understand that flowers are not something that should be sent based on something I was told this morning for the Jewish religion. I'm open to ideas or suggestions. Is there anything else that would be offensive we should steer clear of? Thanks!!!!

 

[ChrisnSteph]

I found this:

In ancient days, fragrant flowers and spices were used at the funeral to offset the odor of the decaying body. Today, this is no longer essential and they should not be used at Jewish funerals at all. In our days, flowers are used primarily at Christian funerals, and are considered to be a non-Jewish ritual custom which should be discouraged.

Rather than sending flowers, Jews honor the deceased by making a contribution to a cause dear to him or her.

It is much better to honor the deceased by making a contribution to a synagogue or hospital, or to a medical research association for the disease which afflicted the deceased. This method of tribute is more lasting and meaningful.

 

[mrsv98]

If they are sitting Shiva, odds are they will have tons of food. If it were me, I would find out which carity they support and make a donation from the office. This is much more meaningful than flowers which fade and can be a lasting memorial to the deceased.

 

[malibuconlee]

I've given a roll of stamps. There are always lots of thank you cards to send out and the expense does add up. My step-mom made comments about them being welcome when she received some, so I've done that instead of food or flowers.

This was for Christian funerals. I'm unfamiliar with Jewish custom, but can't see harm in that. Please correct me if I'm wrong.

 

[Parkhopper]

It would be thoughtful to have a tree planted in Israel in honor/memory of the deceased. You can google and find several places which will do this. Some will send a nice certificate.

Suzi

 

[disneyfanatic60]

oops--sorry---double post

 

[disneyfanatic60]

Thanks everyone--we decided to do a donation to a local Jewish school! Seems more appropriate.