Unexcited Travelers: What to do with non-Disney fans in the parks?

[mhaigalodon]

Help!

I'm headed to Disney in November with my boyfriend's family for a week long vacation. For me (28, new but huge fans of the parks), this is a guaranteed great time. My boyfriend (34, not much of a Disney fan) thinks the parks are just for kids or adults who loooooooove Disney. He doesn't dislike Disney, but I certainly wouldn't call him a fan, and he's the kind to roll his eyes at the idea of "Disney magic." What do I do?? He hasn't been to the parks since he was about 10. How can I help him see it will be a fun vacation even though we're not kids/don't have kids? How do I spread Disney magic to my lovable cynic??

Thanks, all!

 

[BrianL]

Well, you can't force it, but there is a possibility that if he hasn't been since he was 10, then he may very well have a new perspective on it once he gets there. Focus on the truly impressive things, like the nighttime spectaculars. Usually Epcot is a park that works well for non-Disney folks too. Make sure you spend time in the World Showcase, with some great food an drink (men-folk usually love Biergarten - beer and meat!). You may not ever crack him, but you never know. Try to have a relaxed style trip and have a great time.

 

[greentea]

My friend's partner was the same, but a few days in apparently he was wearing Mickey ears and buying the magic 100%. So he might change his mind once he's there, at least enough to think of it as a nice vacation spot where the two of you can have fun. Plan some nice meals for a break from the parks. It'll be fine.

 

[Oswin]

Honestly, you can't get someone who's determined to think a trip to WDW is for kids/nerdy to fully embrace the magic. It will have to find them on its own, or you'll end up tiring yourself out. I always find that my older sister's boyfriends who are like that end up really getting into things once they see all the other men that are there and are acting like big kids again. I think they're always afraid of looking dumb or feeling stupid and when that fear is taken away they're able to have a lot of fun.

Make sure to take some extra time at the World Showcase in Epcot, avoid any kind of character dining for this first trip, and ensure that you guys have plenty of time to do some recreational things. Golfing and renting boats are both a lot of fun, and so is parasailing from the Contemporary! Spend some time at your resort pool, and visit Trader Sam's at the Poly.Go see a movie at the AMC at Disney Springs, or go bowling there. Hit up some of the bars/lounges at the deluxe resort. Plan a spa afternoon for the two of you at one of the spas on property. There's plenty to do on a Disney World vacation that isn't in the parks!

 

[thepicklebee]

I wouldn't focus on the "magic" part... but just the fact that Disney is a fun place with a lot of activities that are enjoyable for adults. There are great attractions and shows, good food, fun places to imbibe in adult beverages, relaxing by the pool, etc. I love Disney, but even I think some people are a bit whackadoo in their over the top passion for the place, so just keep your audience in mind.

 

[glocon]

One other thing- avoid long lines if possible

 

[Lynne M]

The one thing you don't want to do is try really hard to convince him ahead of time that he's going to looooove it. Repeated attempts to make him "see the magic" will turn him right off. He's going. You don't need to talk him into the trip. Let him find his own enjoyment in it once he's there.

Another big turnoff for non-fans is overplanning. I mean, yeah, you need to plan some, it's fine to plan, but don't be spamming his e-mail inbox with schedules and spreadsheets. Do the work you need to do to make the trip go well, but do it in the background.

Epcot is a good park for non-fans, and it's more adult-oriented. Animal Kingdom can be a good choice, too. But do explore the non-park activities that WDW has to offer. Golf, if he's into it. Might be something nice for he and his dad to do while you and his mom hit the parks, or shop. Disney Springs has all sorts of interesting bars and restaurants. The water parks are amazing. A fireworks cruise might be nice. Recreational activities like boating or water skiing, maybe?

 

[ChloeChipper]

agree with what everyone else has said. My husband is an unexcited Disney visitor. He enjoyed it a lot when the kids were little, because he could see all the joy it brought them, but now that the kids are grown - he would just rather not go. He will go if I force him, but I typically don't. When he does go with us, we plan lots of yummy sit-down meals, I try to find less crowded attractions for us, build in non-park time, and try to cater to the things he enjoys. He has fun while we are there, but then that's enough for a while.

 

[alex9179]

My husband had a similar view of a WDW vacation. What I did was make it as easy as I possibly could. I had a rough outline for the day in order to avoid long waits or the higher crowd park and gently guided the family to follow it. I booked a resort that I knew he'd love. We utilized the boats quite a bit because he really enjoyed it. I didn't schedule us from dawn to dusk. We did rope drop or a PPO to take advantage of shorter lines when the park opened, but not every day. One day we hung out at the resort (which the kids loved) and went in the evening for a few shows before the fireworks. Meals were a qs/ts combo but I made sure there were a couple that he'd really like. Um, club level was really nice, too!

We had 3 young kids with us, so it was hard to be super flexible and our youngest was a tyrant. Still, we had a good enough time that he was ok with going back 1.5 yrs later, when we had an even BETTER time, and we're coming up on a third family trip.

Honestly, the service and attitude of all of the CMs we met have a lot to do with why we (he) enjoy it. The little details and quiet moments deserve as much appreciation as the rides/shows/parades that get all the press.

 

[Klayfish]

Yep, agree with all of the above. If he hasn't been since the early 90's, and he was 10 at the time, it'll be an entirely new experience for him. The only thing I would suggest would be asking him to walk in with an open mind. From there, the rest is up to him. He may love it, he may not. He'll make up his own mind. You can try to plan around things that he make tend to like more...is he a roller coaster person, a show person, etc...

 

[yulilin3]

Help!

I'm headed to Disney in November with my boyfriend's family for a week long vacation. For me (28, new but huge fans of the parks), this is a guaranteed great time. My boyfriend (34, not much of a Disney fan) thinks the parks are just for kids or adults who loooooooove Disney. He doesn't dislike Disney, but I certainly wouldn't call him a fan, and he's the kind to roll his eyes at the idea of "Disney magic." What do I do?? He hasn't been to the parks since he was about 10. How can I help him see it will be a fun vacation even though we're not kids/don't have kids? How do I spread Disney magic to my lovable cynic??

Thanks, all!

You do you, enjoy the park to the fullest. Your enthusiasm and love might rub off on him. If it doesn't don't sweat it, nothing you can do about it

 

[Westcoastwild]

It might be worth it to ask him to talk the last trip?

As a kid, I did not enjoy Disneyland. It was less because of the place and more because it was a high stress vacation. My mom insisted that we all stay together. But she doesn't plan well, and my dad hates both crowds and planning.

When I went back as an adult, I didn't have to ride anything I didn't want to. I could just chill in line without someone complaining the line was too long. I could eat "real food"- my mom was all about cheapest food possible, and "we eat all together."

Difference is night and day. Really. It had nothing to do with "magic". It had everything to do planning, or rather my parents lack of. And autonomy. If he doesn't wait for hours to stake out the perfect parade spot, don't make him. If he doesn't want to rope drop, don't make him. If he wants to ride Everest 4 more times instead of making your ADR at BOG...while at that point you can drag him kicking and screaming. If he's smart, he'll negotiate for a whole extra day in which he can ride Everest to his hearts content, and you'll have a way to lure him back for another trip!

 

[georgina]

I'm a Disney fan and even I roll my eyes when people talk of 'Disney magic'. You've gotten a lot of good advice, don't push too hard.

 

[BlueStarryHat]

If he was there in the 90s as a ten-year-old, he might remember standing in long lines and being told what to do by adults more than the vacation itself. Do what others have said and you should be fine-and, like others have said, don't try to convert him if he's not having a good time when you're there.

 

[amberpi]

Booze, food, and nice hotels - just like every other vacation, but plus roller coasters. I've converted 3 extremely cerebral, jaded, cynical men this way. Each one went to placate me. 2 of the 3 within a month or 2 of dating. All of sudden they're riding EE for the fourth time after tequila at Y&Y and thinking its an adult playground and no one has to ever drive, or get upset, just have ADRs and don't make them eat with Mickey right off - or it wouldn't have worked with my foodies, and they'd have wondered what was wrong with me. Note this was over a 10 year period and I married one of them, just saying, I'm not employed to turn well educated guys into WDW enthusiasts or anything. Once they get there and they're having a great time, they'll forget about ALL their reservations You'll have a great time, and so will your SO.

 

[Westcoastwild]

Booze, food, and nice hotels - just like every other vacation, but plus roller coasters. I've converted 3 extremely cerebral, jaded, cynical men this way. Each one went to placate me. 2 of the 3 within a month or 2 of dating. All of sudden they're riding EE for the fourth time after tequila at Y&Y and thinking its an adult playground and no one has to ever drive, or get upset, just have ADRs and don't make them eat with Mickey right off - or it wouldn't have worked with my foodies, and they'd have wondered what was wrong with me. Note this was over a 10 year period and I married one of them, just saying, I'm not employed to turn well educated guys into WDW enthusiasts or anything. Once they get there and they're having a great time, they'll forget about ALL their reservations You'll have a great time, and so will your SO.

Mm. Good point about the booze. I would probably have been a lot less excited about Epcot as a kid. Everything is so much better after a few drinks around the world!

 

[bumbershoot]

he's the kind to roll his eyes at the idea of "Disney magic."

Well, so am I. Who cares?

What do I do??

Nothing.

How can I help him see it will be a fun vacation

Why do you feel you need to do that? He's a 34 year old man and fully capable of managing his own emotions.

Let him find his own enjoyment in it once he's there.

Exactly.

Do the work you need to do to make the trip go well, but do it in the background.

Yes. Get your FP stuff arranged, make ADRs, and then just let it happen.

If he was there in the 90s as a ten-year-old, he might remember standing in long lines and being told what to do by adults more than the vacation itself.

Totally. And I love your avatar.



Seriously, I'm not a "magic" kind of person, and I enjoy the parks just fine. You don't have to be all starry eyed to have a good time.

 

[IrishNYC]

You never know what an anti-Disney person will end up loving. DH was very anti-Disney. For years before we had DD I had nudged DH towards a Disney trip, and he refused. We were together for 20 years before we went to Disney when DD was 5. To say he LOVED it is an understatement. He didn't just love it because he was seeing it through a 5 year old princess lover's eyes, he loved the adult aspect, too. He loved it so much he was planning a trip for just the two of us before we even left, and now he tells all of his anti-Disney friends and coworkers (he's in a very "manly man" profession) that they need to experience it and see how great it is for any age.

 

[jvz82]

My husband doesn't enjoy Disney. He hates crowds (he'll avoid any place with crowds just in general). I feel completely energized from Disney but he feels drained. Our first trip together was about 10 years ago prior to having kids (we were in our early 20s), and since then we have taken 3 trips with our kids. Each trip, I really hope that this will be the trip that he will fall in love with it. But he doesn't, and I don't know that he ever will. But he accepts my love of Disney and doesn't fight me on going. My kids (so far) are on the "loving Disney" train so now he has 5 people begging him to go, lol.

The good news about him not giving up on Disney is each trip I learn a little more about how to make it a trip that works for all of us. I discovered that he loves resort-hopping and character dining. His favorite day of our trip was our "off" day, where we had breakfast at Cape May cafe, explored AKL, and ate dinner at Boma. So I am going to plan more of that next time! I also have to find more times where we can separate. One night at MK, he left at 7 pm with my 2 youngest kids and they went back to the resort to sleep. My two oldest kids and I stayed until midnight to go on more rides and see fireworks. I basically run on fumes when I'm at Disney and don't need a considerable amount of sleep (too excited to sleep!!) but he NEEDS a full night sleep. Even though it's a family vacation and I want us to be together, I have to remember that we'll be happier during our family time if everyone is getting their individual needs met.

So maybe ask his opinion on if there's anything he'd like to do at Disney. Take his personality into consideration when you plan the trip. And try not to take it too personally if he doesn't have fun. I love Disney so much that when my husband says he doesn't like it, I feel like he's badmouthing one of my children or something, lol. It's not personal! But like others said, he might like it. I know my dad had zero interest in Disney until my mom made him go, and he had a blast and then he grew up loving it and taking all of us kids there. So you never know!

 

[Selket]

agree with what everyone else has said. My husband is an unexcited Disney visitor. He enjoyed it a lot when the kids were little, because he could see all the joy it brought them, but now that the kids are grown - he would just rather not go. He will go if I force him, but I typically don't. When he does go with us, we plan lots of yummy sit-down meals, I try to find less crowded attractions for us, build in non-park time, and try to cater to the things he enjoys. He has fun while we are there, but then that's enough for a while.

This...my husband is the same way - in fact even more so as I can't say he has fun while we are there. I can't even say that he enjoyed it when the kids were little even...lol! He doesn't enjoy anything - except perhaps the eating part so I'm always heavy on the dining reservations and free dining is valued for us (husband and two teenage boys now).

Since your BF hasn't been in awhile he might end up enjoying it as others have said theirs did - or you may end up joining our club of Disney negative spouses that can literally inhale all the happiness and wonder out of Disney for you at times with that eyeroll and negative comments. My kids love going to Disney and as they've gotten older I focus on shorter trips with them (DH goes sometimes) which works best for us. I hope your BF comes to love it as much as you do!