Two happy kids, one jealous child...

[seashoreCM]

How do you celebrate their birthdays at home? If you celebrate on the exact day, most of the time the birthday child is in school most of the day and you bring out the birthday cake at dinner time.

You can do it the same low key way at Disney. On an appropriate evening the family has dinner and the birthday cake is brought out. The rest of the day is a plain Disney day for everyone. The birthday kid can wear a birthday badge (does Disney still give those out?) and no other special things need to be done.

You are probably better off dealing with presents (if any in addition to the trip itself) after you get home so you don't have to schlep them all over the place and on airplanes.

Disney hints:
http://members.aol.com/ajaynejr/family.htm

 

[lynninpa]

What do you do if two of your children will be celebrating their birthdays at Disney World (age 17, 9), but one will not (14)?

Just my humble opinion, but I could never celebrate one child's birthday in such a big way and not anothers...and celebrating two kid's and leaving out one? Oh, my! Is it too late to make it a celebration for all their birthdays, no matter what the actual date of their birthdays are? I can't even imagine how the 14yo feels . Sorry, just my humble opinion.

 

[lovespoohbear]

another idea of what you could do is let your son pick one day during the trip and let him pick what ya'll do that day as in what park and rides to go on. thats what we did when we went 10 years ago. of course i was the one that got upset one day but oh well.

 

[paigevz]

I'd let each of the two who have birthdays while there wear their pin and "celebrate" their birthdays on the actual days. I'd let the 14 year old pick another day of the vacation to celebrate a "half birthday" or "quarter" birthday.

Did that one already have a big celebration? If the birthday is upcoming, let this be it for all 3 and have done with it. If this one already got something, promise the other two a similar "half" or "quarter" birthday at home.

 

[luv2nascar]

I have two girls. We went 3rd week in June last and year are going same week again this year. My DH and youngest are 3 days apart in birthdays. DH 6/22, DD2 will turn 3 on 6/25 and DD10 will turn 11 on July 10. We will be there from 6/16 -6/23/06. I have decided to do something special for all three of their birthdays to celebrate so there are no hard feeling.

I am going to try to get a birthday wishes cruise for DH and dinner at LeCellier with a birthday cake ordered. DD2 will have a special chef mickey's birthday dinner with a cake for her birthday. and DD10 will be getting sea world tickets for her birthday and I want to try to book new Bibbidi bobbidi boo boutique for her to get her hair, nails, and make up done. Hopefully no hard feeling. They will each have their own day and birthday pin to wear on that day.

 

[polkadotminnie]

Why not just celebrate everyone's birthday on the actual date? If it happens to fall during the trip have cake, choose the restraurant, and presents. The rest of the trip just enjoy the parks. I agree with the poster that said life is not always fair... I have 3 kids. We went on one of our girls' birthdays last year. We all had a good time. Everyone enjoyed eating at CRT. We did not celebrate the other girls' birthdays, because it wasn't their actual birthday.

 

[memymomonica]

I have to agree with the Merry Un-Birthday. The Day is his to plan. Make him a shirt or a button. There will be plenty of fun for everyone. But at least the attention is on him one day too.

 

[CherCrazy]

My 14-year-old son (who doesn't turn 15 until the end of November) is usually very mellow and easy-going. He is not the type to blurt out if he feels left out. But I've had experiences before when he was pushed back out of the spotlight because he simply didn't want to create conflict.

That being said, this trip would kind of be for my daughters' birthdays. At least, this is their main birthday present. So I really wanted to make it special for both of them, but I don't want to compromise my son's feelings in the process. BUT, like other people said, I think my daughters would feel "cheated" if they didn't get to truly celebrate their birthdays at WDW.

Oh my goodness, Disneyluvr....look at what you are saying....
"But I've had experiences before when he was pushed back out of the spotlight " He is your middle child...the lone male child surrounded by females. You must do everything in your power to make sure that he is NOT pushed back out of the spotlight.

"this trip would kind of be for my daughters' birthdays. At least, this is their main birthday present. So I really wanted to make it special for both of them"
And what the heck more special could you possibly do for your son in November when he has his birthday? Are you taking him to some fabulous dream vacation like you are your daughters to help him celebrate?

I think you are on dangerous ground with your son. He could be really really hurt by this attention on your girls. From what you are saying, he is going to keep his hurt to himself...not a good thing at all. JMHO, but I would make this a birthday trip for ALL THREE of them. Have each of them pick a day to celebrate individually while you are in WDW, wear the pins for a day, etc.

 

[a*lil*bit*goofy]

What I would do (and you can take this with as much salt as you like since I don't have kids, but I DO have siblings) is celebrate the two birthdays separately. It gives both girls their time in the spotlight, and I think they'll both be happier. If you combine them, and the younger one gets more attention, the older one might feel left out. Let them celebrate separately and get an even chance at attention.

For the child who is "left out" when is their birthday? Disney doesn't care when their birthday really is, so you could celebrate that child's birthday while you're there as well whether it is early or late. I'm turning 18 in a few days, but I plan on celebrating in Disney in May. So you could do that, or you could find something else for them to celebrate. Are they entering high school? Did they get great grades on their last report card? Find something excellent that they accomplished for you to celebrate and pick a day to let that child celebrate this and treat them just as you treated the birthday girls. I think all of the children would be happy with the arrangement as long as you treat them all equally. Hope that helped, and I hope you have a great trip!

great advice!!! have one special day for each child. (if you can do it!)

 

[Sammie]

I agree with the suggestion to celebrate the Birthday that is going to occur while you are there.

Or celebrate everyone's or the same day.

Personally I don't get into the celebration of events that don't actually occur while there. If you want to tell your older daughter going to Disney is her birthday gift, then it should also be your son's gift too.

I think I agree with Dr. Phil, that parents send more time worrying about what bothers thier kids than the kids ever do.

They will be so excited to be at Disney, I truly don't think it will be a problem.

 

[a*lil*bit*goofy]

Oh my goodness, Disneyluvr....look at what you are saying....
"But I've had experiences before when he was pushed back out of the spotlight " He is your middle child...the lone male child surrounded by females. You must do everything in your power to make sure that he is NOT pushed back out of the spotlight.

"this trip would kind of be for my daughters' birthdays. At least, this is their main birthday present. So I really wanted to make it special for both of them"
And what the heck more special could you possibly do for your son in November when he has his birthday? Are you taking him to some fabulous dream vacation like you are your daughters to help him celebrate?

I think you are on dangerous ground with your son. He could be really really hurt by this attention on your girls. From what you are saying, he is going to keep his hurt to himself...not a good thing at all. JMHO, but I would make this a birthday trip for ALL THREE of them. Have each of them pick a day to celebrate individually while you are in WDW, wear the pins for a day, etc.

another one with great advice!

my mum's birthday is in may. she is taking me and my family and my brother to disney late this year. its goign to be months after her 'birthday' date but this is when we will celebrate her birthday , with a bang! itsa big year, and it doesn't matter when the birthday 'date' really is. its when u celebrate it. my brother has a birthday the week before we go, and we are going to celebrate his birthday at the parks too!
my point?
doesnt have to be the 'birthdate' when you go.

have each child celebrate at home, (and if the girls date is when u are away, have a birthday night for each before you go) this way they all had a 'regular birthday" but all get a 'magical gift' while being in disney.

so your son doesn't feel out of the limelight, so to speak, explain to them all that this was the best week to go. and yes son birthdate isn't that time but we are celebrating his birthday then too.

maybe order a special dessert one night or cake that says all 3 names on it. it will still be as special for the girls, cause the will know that its their birthday, and your son will feel equally special as he was acknolwedged ...and in the end they would have all had 2 birthdays (being that each girl had a special night of their own before the trip)

thats just my two cents!

 

[lynninpa]

May I ask what your son got for his birthday?

 

[goofy4tink]

Okay...I would give the 7 y/o, who actually has a birthday on this trip, the big, special birthday time. After all, they are all getting the benefit of a birthday trip. It's not as if the girls are going and your ds has to stay home because it's not 'his' birthday gift. And, with the older dd's birthday 2 weeks after the trip, and your ds's in Nov...well, I don't see the problem. Unless of course, your ds has already asked for something very special for his actual birthday. Otherwise, I would celebrate the younger ones actual birthday, and have an un-birthday celebration for the other two...at maybe WCC. Get teeshirts made up with their actual birthdates, but that this is their merry un-birthday. Since everyone is going on the 'birthday trip' I don't think it's a big deal.

 

[babar41]

Oh my! So many issues (middle child syndrome, equality among the siblings, male vs female...), so many ideas from so many people!

First of all, as all parents eventually find out, it is impossible to always be absolutely equal with our kids. But it doesn't stop us from trying!! No parent wants any of their children to feel less loved or special than any other child.

I guess I'm wondering if you already told the kids about the trip. If you haven't then I'd tell them all that it is a EVERYBODYS BIRTHDAY TRIP! If you have already billed this as the girls birthday trip then I would have a talk with your son, let him know you are concerned about his feelings and ask him if he would like to celebrate his birthday during this trip too.

Boys and girls are different, there are things that would really bother a girl, that guys just don't give it a thought. The big problem is you have a double wammy here with him being the middle child and being out numbered with sisters. I'm sure there are things he gets to do that his sisters don't, i.e. go hunting with Dad.

So, a long story short.... give him the choice if he wants to celebrate his birthday or not. If he says no, then respect that, but still let him "plan a day" filled with things he wants to do.

Good luck. And let us know what happens.

 

[pepperw23]

Life isn't fair, and this could be a good lesson for the 14 year old. I don't think the other two should have a toned down celebration of their birtday, so as not to offend the other sibling. Snap out of it! That being said....our family tradition (I also have 3 kids) is that each kid gets a gift on the siblings birthady. Nothing big, just a nice token gift. Of course, the birthday girl or boy gets much more! Not sure exactly what kind of celebration you have in mind, but it seems that whatever you decide to do, the entire family would be involved, so there are no losers. Remind the 14 year old that they will have a birthday, too. Maybe not at Disney, but you can still make it special.

I agree. Kids have to know that it is okay for the other siblings to have attention. This is a good lesson that we are all individuals.

I have two teenagers (sensitive little creatures, teenagers lol). I have always let the other one take a huge part in the planning stages of parties. It makes them feel involved, and now they look forward to "surprising" each other. No one ever feels left out that way.

 

[Disneynutbsv]

How about making up shirts for the birthday kids saying "It's my birthday!" and then for the one not having a birthday saying "It's my un-birthday!" Then maybe they'll all get attention

 

[staylor]

My youngest son's birthday is Dec. 27th. We celebrate his half birthday in June. He loves it. So, maybe let him celebrate his half birthday.
Staci

 

[bytheblood]