Trans couple too afraid to go to Florida - how accepting is Disneyland?

[kylenne]

@kylenne, just wanted to say that I'm so sorry you have to make those calculations when deciding where to travel. "Terf Island" made me do a spittake. I'm going to steal that from you.

(My husband and I used to have Universal APs but refuse to go there now because of JKR as well. I always dreamed of reading Harry Potter to our kid; we'll read him Percy Jackson now, instead.)

The sad thing is harassment can happen anywhere, even in “safe” places…my gf was once verbally accosted in the women’s restroom at the Yorkdale mall in Toronto of all places. The only places I ever 100% let my guard down are explicitly LGBT ones tbh. And WDW (though there’s so much Family running the parks I feel like it should count lol).

a bit off topic but if you want another alternative to HP for your kiddo, Diane Duane wrote a far superior kid wizard series back in the 70s and 80s called Young Wizards. So You Want to Be a Wizard is the first in the series and it is still going! The world building, plot, character development and prose runs circles around JKR tackling serious concepts while still being fun and very much aimed at kids. I grew up on those books and grew up with the characters and they still hold up so well. There is even a gay couple that serves as the heroes’ wizard mentors, which is wild considering when that first book came out.

 

[P'colaBeachBum]

Saw this thread as I was scrolling. Makes me sad to read that people are afraid to come to Fl regardless of who you are. The media has hyped up a lot of negative news and the chairman of the naacp lives in Fl. I was at WDW recently and saw a lot of LGBTQ couples having a good time without issue. I’m from the panhandle of Fl and if you like going to the beach, check this out.
https://www.pnj.com/story/entertain...weekend-an-lgbt-party-in-florida/70124354007/

 

[RoseGold]

I think maybe it's relevant here to say that from what I've seen, WDW has upped its representation in cast members. There were always boys in princess dresses and guests living their best lives, but the shift has gone to employees since Covid. I've gone to WDW many times since Covid, and I have seen many cast members presenting as non-binary and possibly even mixing gendered costume elements, which I know would have been strictly prohibited before Covid. I wish I had taken photos because now I'm thinking that was a big deal.

Another place this stood out was BBB. The godmothers are now "apprentices" and every kid chose a "title" of princess or queen or knight and a ton of others. Def more than one non-conforming cast member floating around at BBB, and that's a big one, IMO.

I mean, you're still in FL, but I have seen the shift in the Disney employees, which I am sure is an intentional shift for all of Disney. In the bubble, Disney is doing its own thing, that isn't matching the rest of FL.

 

[chuff88]

I think maybe it's relevant here to say that from what I've seen, WDW has upped its representation in cast members. There were always boys in princess dresses and guests living their best lives, but the shift has gone to employees since Covid. I've gone to WDW many times since Covid, and I have seen many cast members presenting as non-binary and possibly even mixing gendered costume elements, which I know would have been strictly prohibited before Covid. I wish I had taken photos because now I'm thinking that was a big deal.

Another place this stood out was BBB. The godmothers are now "apprentices" and every kid chose a "title" of princess or queen or knight and a ton of others. Def more than one non-conforming cast member floating around at BBB, and that's a big one, IMO.

I mean, you're still in FL, but I have seen the shift in the Disney employees, which I am sure is an intentional shift for all of Disney. In the bubble, Disney is doing its own thing, that isn't matching the rest of FL.

I remember seeing news about this and it's definitely intentional on Disney's part to create a more inclusive atmosphere and represent more identities. That said, the concerns about receiving emergency medical care as a trans or non-binary person in Florida seem to be a part of this conversation that can't be ignored. While I think we can mostly agree that, generally speaking, WDW property is an inclusive and welcoming place, the issue remains that to get to WDW one must travel through other parts of Florida in one way or another. And the unfortunate reality is that many people don't feel safe or comfortable in those other parts of the state.

 

[Her Dotness]

Life is for living.

Yeah, well, plenty easy to say "Life is for living" if you're cis-straight (also white) and don't need to worry about being refused medical care. Much too easy, in fact.

That said, the concerns about receiving emergency medical care as a trans or non-binary person in Florida seem to be a part of this conversation that can't be ignored. While I think we can mostly agree that, generally speaking, WDW property is an inclusive and welcoming place, the issue remains that to get to WDW one must travel through other parts of Florida in one way or another. And the unfortunate reality is that many people don't feel safe or comfortable in those other parts of the state.

Indeed.

It baffles me why so many fail to understand how very much people so inclined now feel free to be openly antagonistic to anyone not meeting their normalcy criteria.

You never know, healthy though you may be, when something unforeseen might happen that requires medical care. All someone in that situation needs is a provider refusing to treat them because of how they appear or are partnered.

 

[Dug720]

I’m a nonbinary femme and bi, my partner is bi and while cis she is butch and gnc and we are in the same boat, literally and figuratively. We have money tied up in park tickets from having to cancel so many trips due to covid so we were thinking about land/sea next year. We never took a Disney cruise before. But all of this is making me ill. And tbh our alternative cruise options in Europe are really no better than FL. Leave out of Southampton when the UK is basically Terf Island at this point? Go to Spain where entire football stadiums racially abuse Black players? Italy where I previously experienced the worst overt racism in my life? Trust, as a Black femme I have done this “is it safe for me to go there/do I want to spend my money there” math my whole adult life even setting aside the gender/sexuality stuff. I think the added racial element gives me a different perspective on it esp. considering we’re an interracial s/s couple. Literally nowhere is really safe for me, even staying home considering NYPD. Risk assessment and safety calculus is just my reality.

NAACP putting out that statement days before our trip is not making me feel any better about it either, ngl. But at this point we are feeling like being visibly (even defiantly) queer at WDW during Gay Days is probably the best possible thing we can do. For safety we’re avoiding standard rideshare and sticking to Minnie Vans when we need private transportation (we already booked a towncar to/from the airport). And I guess I can keep in mind our money on a local level is mostly going to people who don’t support the regime. But I agree it sucks we have to think about these things in the first place. And hope neither of us need medical treatment while there.

(Universal is a whole other can o worms. They will never see a dime from me as long as they’re in bed with the world’s most evil and dangerous unelected terf. Thank you for saying that because that is a very lonely position to have in this space, depressingly so.)

Yeah. Adding to my confusion now is technically my cruise is 4 days from final payment (I always forget that actual final payment when penalties kick in is 90 days for the shorter cruises even though I have to be paid in full to book activities) so I *could* cancel it and WDW and go to Disneyland instead only losing the $129 for Epcot After Hours.

Which is definitely something to think about after a college classmate who is also lesbian and lives in Florida because her mother needs family close due to health issues and all her doctors are in Florida and it would be complicated to move her anywhere showed me a news story from last week where someone "tampered" with a light up road sign IN Orlando (though not on Disney property) to say "K*$^ ALL THE GAYS" (first word rhymes with Bill). Another friend who lives in Tampa and she and her fiancé are fighting the good fight said she's not as worried for my (or their) safety in the Disney Bubble, but she gets why I wouldn't want to give Florida any of my money.

I'm going to talk with my dad this afternoon before he and my mom leave for B2B Med cruises on the Dream and see what he thinks and make a decision.

 

[DLgal]

I will reiterate that Disneyland and Southern CA as a region, is VERY safe for anyone who is currently feeling wary of visiting Florida. We have none of that discriminatory nonsense here. People appreciate the diversity of the region and Disneyland guests come as they are, and NO ONE cares. It's all good here.

My son rocks his rainbow colored lanyard, pride pins and Disneybounds every time we go to the parks. He's 17. He is not LGBTQ+ (that we know of). He is autistic, is an artist who loves paint and colors, and adores the artistry of the Pride flag. He gets nothing but compliments and fist bumps for his looks.

I have seem numerous people in the women's restrooms that probably don't have the same thing between their legs as I do, and I literally couldn't care less, nor have I witnessed anyone ever say a damn thing.

And our medical care is superb. No one is going to refuse to treat you at any local urgent cares or hospitals.

Come to CA. Disneyland is great. I'm only going to WDW this summer because my kids haven't seen their grandparents in years and they can no longer fly cross country to visit us. I'm not looking forward to having to worry about my son while we are off property, due to his his desire to wear his rainbow stuff. I hate that I even need to think about telling him he should leave those clothing items home. What a world we live in where people are offended by a rainbow on a piece of clothing.

 

[CamillaF]

I’m a nonbinary femme and bi, my partner is bi and while cis she is butch and gnc and we are in the same boat, literally and figuratively. We have money tied up in park tickets from having to cancel so many trips due to covid so we were thinking about land/sea next year. We never took a Disney cruise before. But all of this is making me ill. And tbh our alternative cruise options in Europe are really no better than FL. Leave out of Southampton when the UK is basically Terf Island at this point? Go to Spain where entire football stadiums racially abuse Black players? Italy where I previously experienced the worst overt racism in my life? Trust, as a Black femme I have done this “is it safe for me to go there/do I want to spend my money there” math my whole adult life even setting aside the gender/sexuality stuff. I think the added racial element gives me a different perspective on it esp. considering we’re an interracial s/s couple. Literally nowhere is really safe for me, even staying home considering NYPD. Risk assessment and safety calculus is just my reality.

NAACP putting out that statement days before our trip is not making me feel any better about it either, ngl. But at this point we are feeling like being visibly (even defiantly) queer at WDW during Gay Days is probably the best possible thing we can do. For safety we’re avoiding standard rideshare and sticking to Minnie Vans when we need private transportation (we already booked a towncar to/from the airport). And I guess I can keep in mind our money on a local level is mostly going to people who don’t support the regime. But I agree it sucks we have to think about these things in the first place. And hope neither of us need medical treatment while there.

(Universal is a whole other can o worms. They will never see a dime from me as long as they’re in bed with the world’s most evil and dangerous unelected terf. Thank you for saying that because that is a very lonely position to have in this space, depressingly so.)

The Alaskan Cruise out of Vancouver is Amazing....

 

[Timandalicia]

We're in Delaware so WDW is significantly closer to us, but we're both way too afraid to set foot in Florida. My wife brought up the idea of going to Disneyland in California. How accepting are they? I just assume we'd be safer there than in Florida.

MCO has companion bathrooms. If you are staying in Disney bubble there is a lot of love. There are trans performers in the parades other trans cast, and trans guests. But agree with others , don’t like go to Red Lobster in Kissimmee .

 

[Her Dotness]

MCO has companion bathrooms.

Which is a good thing but a very small one in the overall navigating the airport scenario.

It's getting through MCO to that companion bathroom (if you even need a bathroom) that I can envision feeling extremely unsafe when your manner and appearance says "I'm obviously nonconforming."

Someone nonconforming still must get off the plane, holding their breath that no one says anything offensive or does anything aggressive, while they make a beeline to the bag carousel and then to meet the Minnie Van/towncar.

Yes, the Disney bubble thankfully remains an oasis for anyone who diverges from 1950s-normal white people appearance.

It's everywhere else that is increasingly threatening if not actually hostile.

I'm embarrassed that I can hide behind my straight-female-presenting white privilege with no effort. I'm beyond sad for anyone who hasn't those advantages. It's an America anymore that I never thought I'd live in again, having as a child traveled in segregated states pre-Civil Rights Era. That was an educational and frightening experience.

I doubt I'll ever understand the foolish things people latch onto as justification for behaving hatefully.

I'm ashamed for this country and the overt intolerance that has become nothing unusual.

 

[kylenne]

It's getting through MCO to that companion bathroom (if you even need a bathroom) that I can envision feeling extremely unsafe when your manner and appearance says "I'm obviously nonconforming."

Sadly very true. I’ve seen people on these very boards get extremely upset at the idea of gnc and trans people using companion restrooms, saying that they are only for visibly disabled people and their caregivers.

But a lot of ugly rhetoric demonizing trans people has created an atmosphere of fear and anxiety around public restrooms specifically.

 

[JamesWinston]

Someone might want to send out a search party for the original poster, they seem to have made an account, posted once and disappeared.

 

[DLgal]

That’s good because it’s certainly not safe for anyone else with the rampant crime and homelessness.

This is such an overblown non issue in most of this state. Do you even understand how large CA is?

I live in one of the safest cities in America. It's 15 minutes away from Disneyland. There is no "rampant" crime anywhere near here.

 

[mz-s]

This is such an overblown non issue in most of this state. Do you even understand how large CA is?

I live in one of the safest cities in America. It's 15 minutes away from Disneyland. There is no "rampant" crime anywhere near here.

Many people don't have the luxury to live far away from the homelessness and crime that is rampant in SoCal. You have untold privilege. Statistics don't lie.

 

[DLgal]

Many people don't have the luxury to live far away from the homelessness and crime that is rampant in SoCal. You have untold privilege. Statistics don't lie.

What statistics?

 

[Starport Seven-Five]

Statistics don't lie.

You're right.

Total crime:
Orlando - 6206 per 100k (17th)
Los Angeles - 3333 per 100k (72nd)
Anaheim - 2998 per 100k (76th)

Violent crime:
Orlando - 744 per 100k (34th)
Los Angeles - 761 per 100k (32nd)
Anaheim - 355 per 100k (79th)

Property crime:
Orlando - 5455 per 100k (11th)
Los Angeles - 2536 per 100k (75th)
Anaheim - 2630 per 100k (73rd)

source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_United_States_cities_by_crime_rate

 

[mz-s]

You're right.

Total crime:
Orlando - 6206 per 100k (17th)
Los Angeles - 3333 per 100k (72nd)
Anaheim - 2998 per 100k (76th)

Violent crime:
Orlando - 744 per 100k (34th)
Los Angeles - 761 per 100k (32nd)
Anaheim - 355 per 100k (79th)

Property crime:
Orlando - 5455 per 100k (11th)
Los Angeles - 2536 per 100k (75th)
Anaheim - 2630 per 100k (73rd)

source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_United_States_cities_by_crime_rate

No lies told, except of course the DAs in SoCal are not reporting all crimes or charging all criminals (ACAB and all that)...

What statistics?

For one you live in an area where you can choose your gender and where you spend your thousands of dollars in vacations to stay in your echo chamber, but less than 15 minutes down the road by your own admission people can't even sleep because the city removed all the benches on the street.

 

[DLgal]

No lies told, except of course the DAs in SoCal are not reporting all crimes or charging all criminals (ACAB and all that)...



For one you live in an area where you can choose your gender and where you spend your thousands of dollars in vacations to stay in your echo chamber, but less than 15 minutes down the road by your own admission people can't even sleep because the city removed all the benches on the street.

I don't think you understand what statistics are.

These are not statistics.

 

[kylenne]

The current situation between Disney and the gov has driven a lot of bad faith actors and sea lions to the LGBTQ board here lately and tbqh it’s best to put them on ignore rather than letting them continually derail important discussions. Even if OP is long gone, we should be able to talk about our concerns without every thread turning into the disboards equivalent of the Daily Mail comments. Stop feeding these people, please.

 

[HerzerHerrick]

We're in Delaware so WDW is significantly closer to us, but we're both way too afraid to set foot in Florida. My wife brought up the idea of going to Disneyland in California. How accepting are they? I just assume we'd be safer there than in Florida.

Don't believe the hype. The South gets a bad rap for intolerance, but the fact is 99.9999999999 percent of the time all you may get is a odd look if that(something you can get anywhere I imagine). Just because someone doesn't approve of your life choices doesn't mean they are going to pull out the torches and pitchforks when they see you. Go to Florida and have fun.