The Guilt of the Adult Only Trip...

Diana or Di

And always let your conscience be your guide!
Joined
Apr 5, 2016
So this post is mostly tongue-in-cheek, but I really did feel ALL THE GUILT over my Feb trip to the World. In fairness to me, I was invited along on my best friend's 40th birthday trip, and naturally it would have been rude to ask if my kids could come along.

But the GUILT you guys!!!! My 8 year old felt BETRAYED. She was the one I prepped WELL in advance. I laugh here, but honestly, she's in a mommy-intensive phase and I've never left them for a whole week before. And I mean, they're still younger. The 8 and 12 year old anyway. The 14 year old was fine.

I know I'll go for long weekends and such when they're older, for ME trips. But I can't do another trip that long I don't think. It really did put a little tarnish on what was otherwise an incredible trip. I still dream about the sunsets you can see from the Skyliner. And the restaurant experiences that would bore the crap out of them? I'm so grateful I did it, and as a single mom, the recharge was amazing. I had an alcoholic beverage at every meal.

Also, I saved all my snack credits and used them all for candy to take home for them. The souvenir they appreciate the most. :D :D :D :D :D
 

easyas123

DIS Veteran
Joined
May 4, 2018
My kids were about 10 & 12 when they left US for almost 3 weeks in South
Africa!
They were each in 3rd or 4th grade (respectively) when they individually left to spend 4 -6 weeks sailing in the Caribbean!
So we never felt any guilt about taking a long weekend or even a week to get a vacation in for ourselves!

I say, go, recharge, enjoy yourself once in a while. Makes you a better parent, and it teaches your kids independence and self reliance. Good for everyone at one point or another!
 

MNswimmer18

Earning My Ears
Joined
Mar 9, 2018
I feel you. We went to Scotland last summer for a friends wedding. We brought our youngest who turned one while we were there. There's no way the other two could have come to the wedding. So that meant we would have had to hire a babysitter. Plus all of the additional costs. My oldest (who turns 6 this summer) just asked again recently why we didn't bring her and her brother. I feel bad, but I also know our options were to leave them or not go. I felt really bad when she asked. I explained to her that it would have been very expensive and a lot more work so we couldn't bring them.
 
  • Diana or Di

    And always let your conscience be your guide!
    Joined
    Apr 5, 2016
    My kids were about 10 & 12 when they left US for almost 3 weeks in South
    Africa!
    They were each in 3rd or 4th grade (respectively) when they individually left to spend 4 -6 weeks sailing in the Caribbean!
    So we never felt any guilt about taking a long weekend or even a week to get a vacation in for ourselves!

    I say, go, recharge, enjoy yourself once in a while. Makes you a better parent, and it teaches your kids independence and self reliance. Good for everyone at one point or another!
    Awwww what an amazing experience for them!!! My elder two are on the autism spectrum and as I said, my youngest is mommy-intensive, and while they stayed with the grandparents, the change in routine was not without its share of bumps. Neither of the younger two have ever wanted to spend the night away from home that wasn't with other family that they are familiar with, and the eldest who is now 15 didn't want to start sleep overs and such until probably...a couple years ago maybe? I let them determine their own comfort levels. The youngest is about to turn 9 in a few days, so my travel limitations are fairly short-lived in the grand scheme of things. :D :D :D :D :D

    I offered my oldest, in his first year of high school, to go on a People to People trip offered through his school, and he seemed interested, but not ready for it yet. I'm going to ask again for next school year. I feel like each year he's a little more confident to try new things.
     

    Diana or Di

    And always let your conscience be your guide!
    Joined
    Apr 5, 2016
    I feel you. We went to Scotland last summer for a friends wedding. We brought our youngest who turned one while we were there. There's no way the other two could have come to the wedding. So that meant we would have had to hire a babysitter. Plus all of the additional costs. My oldest (who turns 6 this summer) just asked again recently why we didn't bring her and her brother. I feel bad, but I also know our options were to leave them or not go. I felt really bad when she asked. I explained to her that it would have been very expensive and a lot more work so we couldn't bring them.
    THE GUILT!!!!!!

    I think you made the right call though. International travel when the oldest is 4/5 and an infant for what was probably a quick turn around trip that was dependent on someone else's schedule ( ie the wedding events) would have been miserably trying for everyone, even the jet-lagged kiddos. XOXOXO
     

    friedela

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Nov 15, 2017
    We left our kiddos for 8 days when they were 3 and 4.5 to go on a cruise for our anniversary and I feel like I did pretty well in terms of guilt. But Disney is a whole other ball game. I think I'd lie. LOL 😄
     

    Anthony Vito

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Jan 16, 2017
    We were the other way - no guilt at all. We didn't tell our kids though, we just told them we were going away for a few days (I think we even said Florida). We went for a 4-night stay for our 10th anniversary two summers ago when our kids were 4 and 6. We went last fall again for a 4-night and they were 5 1/2 and 7 at the time. They were also excited to get a long weekend with their grandparents. We did have a few times where we'd mention about the kids liking something or how we couldn't wait until our daughter is tall enough for certain rides (she's very small for her age), but overall, we've loved it.

    Our plan was actually to add on another DVC contract this summer for Riviera to try and go just ourselves each year (most likely in the fall). Now with everything, that's put on hold. Now we'll just have to figure out how to tell the kids in the future before we go without them - that will indeed be the tough part and I'm sure they'll try to make us feel guilty.
     
  • Joined
    Sep 8, 2015
    I'm considering going by myself since my young kids won't be able to wear masks all day or refrain from touching things/touching their faces, etc. But I would feel so guilty not bringing them. I'm 99% sure I'm just going to cancel...
     

    Diana or Di

    And always let your conscience be your guide!
    Joined
    Apr 5, 2016
    We were the other way - no guilt at all. We didn't tell our kids though, we just told them we were going away for a few days (I think we even said Florida). We went for a 4-night stay for our 10th anniversary two summers ago when our kids were 4 and 6. We went last fall again for a 4-night and they were 5 1/2 and 7 at the time. They were also excited to get a long weekend with their grandparents. We did have a few times where we'd mention about the kids liking something or how we couldn't wait until our daughter is tall enough for certain rides (she's very small for her age), but overall, we've loved it.

    Our plan was actually to add on another DVC contract this summer for Riviera to try and go just ourselves each year (most likely in the fall). Now with everything, that's put on hold. Now we'll just have to figure out how to tell the kids in the future before we go without them - that will indeed be the tough part and I'm sure they'll try to make us feel guilty.
    Yeah it's easier when they don't know, for sure. Mine were 8, 12, and 14 at the time of travel. They KNEW. :D :D :D
     

    Diana or Di

    And always let your conscience be your guide!
    Joined
    Apr 5, 2016
    I'm considering going by myself since my young kids won't be able to wear masks all day or refrain from touching things/touching their faces, etc. But I would feel so guilty not bringing them. I'm 99% sure I'm just going to cancel...
    I feel like a long weekend would be okay, right? Not long enough that they'd notice but enough time for you to recharge??

    I went for a week. It was tough. That said, I just booked MY 40th birthday trip for September/October of '21 and it's another adults only trip. But I'm hoping a) I'll have just traveled with the kids there in March and b) they'll be 10+ so maybe it won't bother them, particularly the youngest, as much? Here's hoping.
     

    courtney1188

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Apr 24, 2018
    I feel like a long weekend would be okay, right? Not long enough that they'd notice but enough time for you to recharge??

    I went for a week. It was tough. That said, I just booked MY 40th birthday trip for September/October of '21 and it's another adults only trip. But I'm hoping a) I'll have just traveled with the kids there in March and b) they'll be 10+ so maybe it won't bother them, particularly the youngest, as much? Here's hoping.
    I went for a long weekend in December as a solo trip! It was AMAZING to have that time to recharge and just do whatever I wanted. However, you are a more honest parent than me because I totally lied to my children about where I was :rotfl:
     



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