School question...

[EveDallas]

I have a dilemma, and I really don't know what to do, so I thought I'd get some opinions from my DIS friends.

A little background. My DS(14) is in the 8th grade this year. He has some health issues as well as ADHD and Asperger's, so school isn't his favorite thing. He tries hard but struggles and calls himself dumb sometimes because he is in some remedial classes.

School started about a week and a half ago. Today he came home with a new schedule. No biggie as far as I knew, schedules are always being switched around in the beginning.

The problem came this evening. MY DS and I went to meet the teacher night and his karate coach (the school offers karate as a choice in place of traditional PE) tells me "Oh, he is in last period? He'll be the highest rank - that class is all beginners."

That is what is bothering me. Karate is one of the few things he likes about school - he is good at it and it has done wonders for his self-esteem. I really don't want him in a class where he is going to be bored or not learning new things. I'm thinking about calling his counselor tomorrow and asking to have him put back in the class he was in. But I don't want to cause problems or be one of "those" parents.

So, what would you do? My gut is telling me this is a bad decision for him, and he needs to be with kids who are on his level.

 

[JessicaR]

Listen to your gut reaction and call the counselor to discuss the situation.

 

[Glynis]

I would definitely check with the counselors! Hear why they put him in that class, and then give your reasons why he should be moved.

You are the only advocate your son has. If you don't fight for his education, who will?

 

[BCDisneyFanatic]

I have a dilemma, and I really don't know what to do, so I thought I'd get some opinions from my DIS friends.

A little background. My DS(14) is in the 8th grade this year. He has some health issues as well as ADHD and Asperger's, so school isn't his favorite thing. He tries hard but struggles and calls himself dumb sometimes because he is in some remedial classes.

School started about a week and a half ago. Today he came home with a new schedule. No biggie as far as I knew, schedules are always being switched around in the beginning.

The problem came this evening. MY DS and I went to meet the teacher night and his karate coach (the school offers karate as a choice in place of traditional PE) tells me "Oh, he is in last period? He'll be the highest rank - that class is all beginners."

That is what is bothering me. Karate is one of the few things he likes about school - he is good at it and it has done wonders for his self-esteem. I really don't want him in a class where he is going to be bored or not learning new things. I'm thinking about calling his counselor tomorrow and asking to have him put back in the class he was in. But I don't want to cause problems or be one of "those" parents.

So, what would you do? My gut is telling me this is a bad decision for him, and he needs to be with kids who are on his level.

How many years of karate does your DS have? Maybe it would be good for his self-esteem to be the class 'expert'? Could you talk to the coach about putting him in some sort of leadership role (i.e., for demonstrations, helping other students, etc.)?

 

[C.Ann]

I think it's worthy of at least a discussion.. Have you asked your son how he feels about being in a beginners class? I would find out how he feels about it and then proceed from there..

Good luck..

 

[Jennasis]

Karate in school? Really? Half the school around here have banned any kind of contact sport during recess and PE. Fascinating.

Talk to the counselor and the PE teacher and see what options are available. There is no harm in inquiring. Just don't make demands and be OK with being told that's how it will be.

 

[EveDallas]

How many years of karate does your DS have? Maybe it would be good for his self-esteem to be the class 'expert'? Could you talk to the coach about putting him in some sort of leadership role (i.e., for demonstrations, helping other students, etc.)?

That's another thing that I'm thinking about - maybe it would benefit him to be the one others look to for help for a change. His coach did mention something like that tonight, but we didn't really get to talk because it was really packed.

Maybe I should wait a couple weeks to see how the coach handles it? I'm really torn about this.

 

[BCDisneyFanatic]

That's another thing that I'm thinking about - maybe it would benefit him to be the one others look to for help for a change. His coach did mention something like that tonight, but we didn't really get to talk because it was really packed.

Maybe I should wait a couple weeks to see how the coach handles it? I'm really torn about this.

It's hard sometimes to figure out what's best for our kids, isn't it.

I've often found that the best teachers and classes for my kids have been the ones that I least expected. While I don't think there is anything wrong with discussing the situation with the counsellor and the coach, it might be worth waiting and seeing the class dynamics before pushing for a change. If the coach is any good, he will be able to differentiate instruction and make sure that your DS is actively involved and learning new material.

 

[Hannathy]

Just a thought but does the school, in particular the person in the scheduling office, KNOW your son takes Karate out side of school. It could just be an honest mistake in that they think because he hasn't taken it in school before he hasn't taken it anywhere before and is a beginner?

I would start with your son and ask what he want to do. Be the best and help and maybe be bored OR let the school know he isn't a beginner and switch if possible. If he wants to switch I would start with a nice call to the scheduling office and relay the info he isn't a beginner and see what they say or can do.

 

[worm761]

DS has Asperger's Syndrome too. So I completely understand where you are coming from. Give the class a week or so and see how he likes it. Being the smart one or the better one, the one not struggling might help.

 

[kwitcherkicken99]

Definately have a chat with the conselor. It may be a schedule conflict due to class shifts, but at least get an answer.

If anything, maybe the instructor will use him as an example of technique and for sparring if he's stuck in there. Could turn out to be a good thing.

 

[golfgal]

Another way to look at it that could be really positive-he can be an assistant in the class and help the new students. That is really rewarding and a good way for him to boost his self esteem. When our kids were in TKD the higher belts always helped the lower belts. Now the big negative is that he won't be working as much on his skills to advance but maybe the instructor will deal with that and work with him alone??

 

[MushyMushy]

I agree with the others that this could be a really good thing for him. It sure doesn't hurt to ask why he was placed there and if it can be changed, but being the most advanced in class and having the opportunity to show what he knows can also help him improve his skills.

 

[Becky2005]

Definately have a chat with the conselor. It may be a schedule conflict due to class shifts, but at least get an answer.

That's what I'm thinking...it may not be so much that he was put into that class because he was a beginner BUT because that was the only opening available for Karate when the other schedule changed.

It doesn't hurt to ask but I would definitely see the dynamics, you just never know. The fact that the coach is already aware that he is beyond a beginner is a good thing.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I would call up the counselor and get info anyway.

 

[EveDallas]

Thanks for the replies everyone! I did ask DS what he wants to do and he wants to stay in the lower class for now. I did e-mail his coach and ask how what DS will be doing since he already knows the material. Hopefully it will work out well

 

[PollyannaMom]

I'm with the "this could be a good thing" thoughts. When a child struggles in one area, I think it's very helpful for him to realize that he is the strong one in another area. It the coach mentioned (even quickly) about having him help out the other students, it's sound like he's really on top of it, and will do his best to make the class a positive one for your DS, in spite of the less than perfect scheduling options.

 

[golfgal]

Scheduling is tough. Every year some of the seniors at our high school end up having to take the freshman band class because they can't fit any of the other bands into their schedule. They get the music for their "correct" band and they do get to perform at concerts.

 

[mjkacmom]

I'd ask, but it might just be how the schedule worked out. I know that starting probably next year, dd14 will no longer have a lunch period if she gets into the choir she wants. Lots of kids do without lunch in HS because of scheduling conflicts, especially with budget problems, and less teachers.