RSVP on birthday parties.. I guess is not cool any more?

[Patience]

I always have to call or email to follow up on party invitations. Drives me nuts!

 

[LJSquishy]

I am not a parent, but as an adult who likes things very organized, it really bothers me if people don't RSVP when asked. I think it's very rude to show up for a party that you did not RSVP to unless it wasn't required.

Most people did RSVP for our wedding, and we had the little RSVP cards with a SASE (self-addressed stamped envelope) so they could just drop them in the mail.

In the future, I would suggest doing that if it is for a party that really requires an accurate head count such as the Chuck E Cheese parties that you pay for, or bouncy house parties that include x-number of kids, etc.

Another option is to do RSVP Regrets Only. So, only those who can't attend will call. I'm not sure how well that would work for a child's birthday party but I suppose it would allow you to get a slightly more accurate head count. If no one calls, assume everyone is attending.

I love real invitations that come in the mail (or are handed out) but a lot of people seem to be doing the online invites now through your email...I can't think of the name of the company I'm thinking of, but you look at the virtual invite online and can click whether or not you will be attending. It works well if you have their email addresses, though I do find it a little impersonal.

 

[sweetdana]

Lol - that's how it goes. When is the party? I send out invitations less than 2 weeks before the party, and put the RSVP date a few days before the party (we have them out, so the venue wants to know).

Ds10's party was this weekend. 10 were invited. About 7 RSVP'd. Two who RSVP'd yes didn't show up. Two who didn't RSVP did show up. So, it all worked out. What I've learned to do was do a goody item that can be flexible (either stuff I can return, or something like a candy buffet, which I did this weekend, and it worked great).

This is VERY common with kids parties. Luckily, everyone dd10 invited was a GOOD GOOD friend, and I'm really close with the parents. Twelve were invited, 12 RSVP'd, 12 showed up.

invites went out last week mon, rsvp date is today.. party is sat.. (2-2)

 

[sweetdana]

It's not just birthday parties. My mom spent a lot of time making calls for our wedding trying to find out if people were going to come to our wedding. At least a third didn't RSVP. How hard is it to check a box and return a self addressed stamped envelope?

I usually just put "RSVP Regrets Only" on the invites. That way I know I won't go over my invited number.

WOW! that is kind-a unreasonable.. my dd8 b-day is 14$ a kid for no shows.. I can only imagine the wedding costs..

 

[sweetdana]

I would agree with the suggestion to include an e-mail address for the RSVP. That way people can RSVP at their convenience. Sometimes I remember to RSVP at times that are unacceptable to call, so providing an e-mail address makes it much easier.

I did.. Email, txt or call..

 

[sweetdana]

Next yr i will try the evites.. We will see how many kids go..

 

[platamama]

This year I did evite.com (my DD8 is also having an ice skating thumbsup2) and got all my RSVPs within two days (I sent it out just 1 1/2 weeks in advance). I like it also because you can see who else has been invited, if there's others you can carpool with, that sort of thing.

 

[ssawka]

People are just rude! and it isn't just kids' parties. I threw a 40th Birthday party for DW and I had to send out reminder notes in order to get any responses. If you give a date to respond by, everyone will wait until the last minute to respond. People will also respond after the "respond by" date. Also, once you have your count, expect many of those that responded to not show. I guess people don't realize that you are paying for them if they say they will come, or they just don't care!

 

[emma'smom]

So timely! Dd8's birthday is on Sunday. The RSVP date was this past Wednesday. We received several responses yesterday and today....and there are still some who haven't bothered even letting us know.

One of them is my neighbor--the one my dd plays with almost every day! I figured she wasn't coming since we didn't hear a peep about it--nothing! We saw them today and actually flat out asked "Oh yes, of course she'll be there!" How am I supposed to know that if they don't tell me?

It's a flat rate for the first 12 kids...but extra for each additional. The issue is placing orders for pizza, getting favors ready, etc.....

 

[runsandjumps]

I hate throwing parties. We rented a pool and invitations were a total waste of time really.

I like evites way better. Hope it works out for you.

 

[luvmy3]

I'll be honest and say that I am one of those parents who sometimes forgets to RSVP to a child's birthday party. I don't mean to, but since your childs birthday party isn't high on my personal priority list, it just happens. Like a pp mentioned, I usually remember late at night when its too late to call or I'll remember a couple days after the RSVP date and figure there is no point in calling then anyway. Putting an email address helps, but if the invitation isn't sitting right in front of me then I probably wont remember it when I'm on the computer. So on behalf of the forgetful parents, I apologize, its just how we are.
(FTR, I would never send my child to a party that we haven't actually RSVP'd yes to.)

 

[punkin]

The worst is when people say they are coming and then don't show up last minute. My niece's birthday party this year had 5 no-shows who had RSVPed. Weird and inconsiderate.

 

[LoverDisney]

I have dealt with this several times. I not sure if anyone mentioned this: but one year I put "Regrets only call _____ or email _______" on the invite. I got more responses that way.

 

[Disneydonnam]

My family is the worst when it comes to reply. The last invitation we sent I added under the RSVP for those of you who don't know what this means. Call me and let me know if yes you will be attending or no we won't be there. I did hear from everybody and at least half the responses were of course we will be there why wouldn't we come..

 

[Topper]

"Regretfully, we will be unable to accommodate anyone who attends without having RSVP'd."

 

[englishteacha]

Yet another reason why I hope Z will like doing something special with one or two friends (or her cousins who are born the same week) rather than a party!

 

[mermaidblue!]

People who actually RSVP are seriously becoming rare. (I've done lots of b-day parties for my kids, so I've been there too!)

I treasure the considerate people out there who take the time to RSVP!

 

[wgeo]

Both of my kids parties this year had almost everybody RSVP. Of course, some of those came in the night before and one of them actually an hour before the party started, but since we just do at home parties it didn't throw me too much. I did have 1 rsvp yes who then didn't show, which is rather frustrating since we waited to start all the activities in case they were just late.