"Retard" and "Retarded"

[kdibattista]

Consider this a Public Service Announcement.

I have heard it a lot recently and it is quite offensive. My sister and niece have Down Syndrome and are mentally retarded. To hear people use the term "retard" and "retarded" in a negative way is like having someone punch me in the gut. It literally takes my breath away. It is quite sad to those of us who have loved ones who are are affected.

Definition:

re·tard·ed ( P ) Pronunciation Key (r-tärdd)
adj.
Often Offensive. Affected with mental retardation.
Occurring or developing later than desired or expected; delayed.

I know most who use it do so without thinking... I'm asking you to think first.

Carry on... back to your regulary scheduled DISing

 

[BibbidiBobbidiBOO]

Good PSA!

DH has an older brother with Down Syndrome and was very offended by the word growing up. He does not want to hear it to this day. We have taught our children not to use it.

 

[Hollister]

At my high school we arent aloud to say "retard" they say if we MUST say it we have to say " mental retardation"

 

[binny]

ITA people need to think before they speak. Sadly that doesnt seem to happen very often.


Seems to me like its one of the last accepted prejudices actually.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I agree very much. And it's not just that, either. It was a kick in the gut to us to have the very nice lady who arranged the financing on our van make some comment about someone moving around like they had Tourettes in a joking way when we have a teenage son who has TS.

Mental retardation, TS, CP, etc, etc, are not things to joke around about --they are real conditions (for lack of a better word--my mind is working yet today--haven't had coffee ) that people live with and it hurts to have the terms thrown around in hurtful and joking ways. People need to think before they talk.

 

[Scutapipig]

THANK YOU for posting this.

 

[LisaR]

That seemed to be the favorite word of my kid's friends. I have also heard many adults that use that word. I think it is one of the most insulting words someone can say. We have taught our children that they are to never use that word and we explained why. In turn, they have told their friends that they better not ever say that around me. I just don't get how people think that word is fine.

 

[Fantasmic303]

Couldn't agree more.

Using it in the wrong context is akin to using a four letter word around here.

 

[Ranatra]

Good Post! People need to think before they speak.

I'm always offended when people actually makes jokes (and believe me there's a ton of them) about forgetting things and having Alzheimers, then they laugh. I take care of my Mom with this, and believe me, it's NO Laughing Matter. I wish people would stop doing this.
Ok, I feel better now.

 

[Jennasis]

Here here! I makes me want to scream when I hear people use it in a derogatory manner. My two sisters are big offenders. I coach the Special olympic team and they STILL use it around me. Makes me so angry.

 

[Nasi]

I couldn't agree more with your post. My DS has Down Syndrome and even my DH's family would use this word inappropriately. It took a long time to break them of that habit. It drives my crazy. Nancy

 

[Kim&Chris]

I agree 10000%. I cringe when I hear people referring to others as such.

Great PSA!!

 

[vince971]

I agree. It is sad to think that for some of us that term was an acceptable way to "cut on" a friend who may make a mistake when we were growing up. It has always bothered me to hear people use that word improperly and I WILL DEFINITELY TEACH MY CHILDREN,AS THEY GROW, HOW MUCH IT HURTS OTHER PEOPLE WHEN WORDS LIKE THESE ARE THROWN AROUND CARELESSLY!!

 

[MareQ]

That seemed to be the favorite word of my kid's friends. I have also heard many adults that use that word. I think it is one of the most insulting words someone can say. We have taught our children that they are to never use that word and we explained why. In turn, they have told their friends that they better not ever say that around me. I just don't get how people think that word is fine.

It's a favorite phrase of my sister's kids and her husband - they even refer to the "little bus" as the "tart cart" - to make matters worse my oldest child is a special needs child with cognitive issues- why can't they realize that what they say is inappropriate and hurtful?

 

[aunt kelly]

Thanks for the reminder. When I was growing up in the 60s/70s, we referred to persons w/ Down Syndrome as being "mentally retarded," and the term was not considered derogartory (or at least most of us thought so).

When I went to college, I used the term "mentally retarded" one day to refer to someone w/ Down Syndrome. A friend of mine who was a special education major quickly corrected me and explained to me why I shouldn't use this term. She also politely explained to me how much potential people w/ Down Syndrome have, and how it was not necessary for me to feel sorry for these people. She explained they lead productive and fulfilling lives, and that the rest of us could learn some important life lessons from people w/ Down Syndrome.

I don't hear many people my age (children of the 60s and 70s) using the term "retarded" in a derogatory way. We grew up w/ the term "mentally retarded" and understand how wrong it is to use that term in an improper manner. However, I hear younger people, including younger adults, using that term all the time in a derogatory way.

I'm going to politely speak up when I hear that term misused. Thanks for the reminder!

 

[binny]

omgosh the bus joke is a total pet peeve!!

 

[missypie]

Just to make you even more angry, this is the worst thing I've seen in a long time:

Last year, at a dance competition, a group of maybe 9-12 year olds danced to "Let's Get Retarded" (a distasteful remake of Black-Eyed Peas "Let's Get it Started." ) They were all in costumes that had something "wrong" or "odd" about them...e.g., a girl in a pink tu-tu with big knee pads. In their dance, they were actually acting "retarded."

I'd have bounced them out of the competion so fast, they wouldn't have known what hit them. I would have truly stopped their music. It's one thing if an idiot dance teacher thought this would be cute, but what were the PARENTS of all those kids thinking? They were just cheering their kids on to beat the band. Afterwards I wrote an angry letter to the company that put on the competition, but didn't receive a response.

 

[elizke]

This has always bothered me so much. I don't have anyone in the family with this type of situation, but I always knew it was wrong to use these words as an insult or a joke. There have always been people who did, and it just sounds awful to me.

I am teaching my kids in no uncertain terms not to use them ever. Can't believe that I still hear it.

 

[DisneyAddict_M]

My aunt (my mother's identical twin sister) and my cousin are both mentally challenged. It used to bother my grandmother a lot when I used to say that (hey, I was a typical teenager! lol), but it doesn't bother me to hear it. Don't know why. FTR, I no longer say it.

 

[Miss Jasmine]

"Retard" and "Retarded" are not words we accept in our home. It's always a battle with DD and DS though because their mother doesn't care. There's a lot of words their mother doesn't care about that aren't acceptable to us, but that's another thread.