Question for teachers

[Marseeya]

Poll coming. Wait for it!

I just want to know if you were a parent before you were a teacher or vice versa.

Do you think being a parent first made you a better teacher?

Or do you think being a teacher first made you a better parent?

 

[golfgal]

I think that being a parent of kids older then you teach makes you a better teacher simply because you understand the kids better, what they are going through, you have reasonable expectations of their capabilities, etc. I know that my kids have had teachers that have either not had kids or their kids were still young and I had to laugh several times at what they expected the kids to do, act like, etc. One teacher in particular has changed dramatically since her kids have started school and has figured out that 6 year old will not sit still all day and listen to everything you tell them the first time. My aunt was a teacher for 40 years and was never able to have children of her own. She was a great teacher but didn't quite understand how much work it really is to be a parent and wasn't at all sympathetic when parents had issues with their kids. She always blamed the parents for things their kids did and never quite understood that sometimes even the best parents have kids that just don't do what the are supposed to do.

 

[Bella the Ball 360]

All parents can be teachers and should be teachers not in the professional sense but rather you are your child's first teacher. I think parents need to be the best they can be in order to set an example for their kids. I used to read 5 books per week before I got my masters.

It kills my kids b/c I had a degree in psych and art and went back for my teaching cert when I was 40 while working as an aide. It really it drives them crazy b/c they cannot complain about school work or how hard it is or how I do not understand what it is like to go to school b/c I did it NOT that long ago while keeping a house, taking care of kids and studying. OH and PS I had a 4.0 average.

 

[LBAK]

I was a teacher first and of course I was going to be a great teacher! Then I had kids. I definitely became more tolerant of parents (although most of them are still crazy ), and changed some of my methods. I realized that you can't be the teacher the text books want you to be. Now 20 years into the game I am fed up with parents because they all have gifted and perfect children and they don't teach them how to respect other people, JMO. Of course not all parents are like this but more and more are in this area. I still adore my children though and I take my responsibility more seriously. So yes, I became a better teacher once I had children!

 

[Bella the Ball 360]

I was a teacher first and of course I was going to be a great teacher! Then I had kids. I definitely became more tolerant of parents (although most of them are still crazy ), and changed some of my methods. I realized that you can't be the teacher the text books want you to be. Now 20 years into the game I am fed up with parents because they all have gifted and perfect children and they don't teach them how to respect other people, JMO. Of course not all parents are like this but more and more are in this area. I still adore my children though and I take my responsibility more seriously. So yes, I became a better teacher once I had children!

You are so right they are all gifted and perfect in their eyes. Don't you know it is the teacher's fault they cannot tie shoes, eat a balanced diet, say thank you, etc ,etc .
In our school system we started a Gifted and Talented program. Requirements were an IQ test as well as a recommendation from the child's current teacher. Well parents complained so much they dropped the IQ and then the parents bugged the teachers so much that they just gave recommendations to shut them up.

 

[bananiem]

I was a teacher first. I haven't taught since becoming a parent but I think some of my teaching would change. A lot of it would stay the same though.

 

[golfgal]

I was a teacher first and of course I was going to be a great teacher! Then I had kids. I definitely became more tolerant of parents (although most of them are still crazy ), and changed some of my methods. I realized that you can't be the teacher the text books want you to be. Now 20 years into the game I am fed up with parents because they all have gifted and perfect children and they don't teach them how to respect other people, JMO. Of course not all parents are like this but more and more are in this area. I still adore my children though and I take my responsibility more seriously. So yes, I became a better teacher once I had children!

We did a school visit in the town we are moving to this summer and we were discussing classes for DS13 for next year. She was talking about their AP courses and if we wanted him in there we needed to apply, etc. Her eyes about popped out her her head when we told her that yes, he was fully capable of being a honor student but his laziness prevents that. She said she never had a parent be realistic about their kids work habits and asked if I was a teacher .

 

[Linnie The Pooh]

I was a (spec. ed) teacher first. When I became a parent, I had a baby with a disability. It made me soooo much more sensitive to what it is like to not only be a parent, but a parent of a child with a disability.

I believe being a parent is not something you can fully "know" until you become one. At least it wasn't for me. I took care of my nephew, but until I actually had a child of my own, I didn't realize what it was like. It's so life changing. It didn't and wouldn't alter my teaching-that's my job and I do it to the best of my ability-parent or not. But it made me more empathetic and understanding as to why parents do what they do and why.

 

[beautybelle]

First of all I have to say that normally I truly dont reply to threads unless I have something positive to say BUT I have got to put in my 2 cents worth in here. First let me say that Im not speaking of ALL teachers by any means BUT I cant tell you how many time I've been in our teachers lounge at our school and on message boards (not just this one) and hear constantly about how unrealistic parents can be and how rude this kid is or that. Well let me just say that I have gotten to the point that when I hear a teacher talking to another teacher (patting themselves on the back about how perfect they are) and the rest of the parents are "crazy" (I think I seen that mentioned here somewhere) it makes me want to puke. In our school system, I'd love to have a dollar for every teacher that truly does not need to be trying to teach children. I have seen kids leave the school in the evening stressed to their limit from being screamed at all day (yes, I have seen and heard this) I have seen little kids with backpacks on their backs that almost weigh as much as they do (literally) and other things that I dont have enough room to even mention. So even though parents are not perfect, and if you enter the teaching profession you will have to deal with them, teachers are by far not perfect either.

 

[JoyG]

I was a teacher first and then became a parent...

I think I became a better teacher after having children (not a dramatic change of course, but subtle changes). I became so much more empathetic when I had my own children. These little kids are someone's pride and joy. They go home to someone (hopefully) that loves them to pieces (even if they drive me crazy all day! )

I try to remember that when talking to parents and try not to be so blunt at parent teacher conferences. I'll never get over the feeling I had when my son had his first teacher in nursery school. She was in love with him...It felt like she loved my child almost as much as I did. It was great to have such positive glowing remarks about my son.

So that is the piece I've gotten as a parent. Even for the challenging kids, I try to see them through their parent's eyes. At conferences, I always try to start off with a glowing remark before we get down to the nitty gritty.

I suspect as my kids get older and I have to help them more and more with their homework I might realize I've been handing out too much homework myself all these years! We'll see.

 

[vettechick99]

I think it can go either way. I'll definitely be a better parent now that I work with kids of all races, ages, ecomonic and ability backgrounds.

 

[Aurora63]

I am a teacher now, not a parent yet.

I think when I become a parent, having been a teacher will have helped me prepare a little...and I think I'll probably be a better teacher for it.

But I have to say...I get tired of people (parents, fellow teachers, etc.) who think not having children is the reason for any particular weakness that might show through on a given day. For instance, during a parent conference, one parent asked at the end if I had children. No it wasn't friendly chit chat. But it bothered me, since the topic had been mostly about her daughters behavior issues, seemed like she was assuming I didn't have kids simply because her daughter was having behavior problems. Her tone and the general direction of the conversation made me think so.

(of course this child was a joy for her previous teachers...not! )

 

[Wishing on a star]

I am not a teacher, so I cannot answer the poll.
But, I have to mention something that nobody else has mentioned yet.
Why do the two have to be mutually exclusive?
I guess I could see how the experience of parenthood could be beneficial to teachers. And I could also see how being a teacher could also be beneficial to parents. I think there should be a 'both' in the poll! (instead of just an 'or')



PS: Just wanted to mention to Beautybell that I appreciate your comments.

 

[Blondy876]

I was a good teacher before I became a parent but being a parent helped me see my students in a whole different light.

 

[daisyduck123]

I taught for 4 years before I had my DD (now 11 yo).

Being a parent has definitely made me a better teacher.
I understand exactly what the little kids are going thru with all of their little problems.
I am more compassionate & definitely more tolerant.

And I understand when someone forgets their library books on our "library day"......it happens to my DS8 all the time!

 

[paigevz]

I was pregnant with my first the first year I taught. I am definitely a better teacher now, but is that from parenting experience or teaching experience?

I think both have helped me with both!

 

[DVC Jen]

I was a parent first. I also think being a teacher has made me a better parent. I do know that I appreciate how well behaved (they do have their moments however) my own kids are.

And being a teacher after being a parent makes me appreciate my own kids teachers more...and makes me even madder on the rare occassion my kids have a bad teacher.