Person with Diabetes and Mental Disabilities-can I get her to my Dis Wedding?

[disneycrazed139]

Hi there,

We are planning a wedding, and have booked a December date at Disney. That said, there is a very important wedding guest who has major disabilities, and we are thinking of even cancelling our plans if we can't accomodate her.

She has diabetes and is mentally not able to care for herself either. She lives in a nursing home. We want to get her to Disney resorts for the wedding and know she would need a private nurse and accompaniement the whole time. We are from NJ.

Has anyone dealt with this before or knows a resource that might provide a service of this type. I thought maybe Disney might have dealth with this as well,

Any advice is appreciated. Thanks!

 

[Cheshire Figment]

I would suggest, as a start, talking to Social Services at her Nursing Home. If you are planning to fly, it might be worth contracting with a person (CNA or above) in your area who would be willing to come on a trip. You would have to obviously cover their transportation and lodging, at least, and probably give that person at least some time to themself to go to the parks.

I guess a question would be is how much assistance would this person need.

Possibly a little more detail might assist people in answering your questions.

 

[disneycrazed139]

Thanks for the tip about contacting social services. That is definitely a first step.

A littlel more information about what she can do:

She has diabetes so she needs injections regularly, etc. She can't do this herself because she is mentally ill and she doesn't know her schedule, dosing, or how to do it. She also needs someone to monitor her meals. And she will get lost if left alone. That said, she can walk by herself and needs no help with daily living things like the bathroom, etc.

Yet she still needs constant supervision.

Any other ideas?
Thanks very much for the response!


Anxious to get married in Disney!

 

[Cheshire Figment]

This possibly sounds like something a responsible teenager could assist with, especially if they have had babysitting and First Aid training.

Do you know a family where they might allow a teenage girl to come to Florida with you who could share the room with her and provide the assistance. You would, of course, have to pick up expenses but would only require a nominal payment and not the large payments that would be due to getting a professional.

Possibly getting a college student. Of course, for this you might have to consider when you are planning to have the wedding and their school and exam schedule.

 

[SueM in MN]

She has diabetes and is mentally not able to care for herself either. She lives in a nursing home. We want to get her to Disney resorts for the wedding and know she would need a private nurse and accompaniement the whole time. We are from NJ.

This may or may not be doable.
Yes, you can probably work something out, but how easy or difficult it would be is going to depend on many factors. When thinking of everything, it may not be in this person's best interest to go.
This is kind of a rambling list of some of the things I've thought about (I'm an RN, so maybe think of different things than a lay person).

I agree that you need to contact the Social Worker at the Nursing home. He/she would be able to help you with possible resources, but even more important, help to make sure you don't jeapardize the funding that is paying for the Nursing Home. You also need to make sure that you would be able to hold her place in the Nursing Home while she is gone. If these can't be done, the trip can't happen.

These are questions you really need to be able to answer to decide if this will work or not and to plan for how to do it (I'm assuming she is in New Jersey and would travel by plane):
Who is her legal guardian/conservator and do they agree with the idea?
Would there be familiar people to travel with her?
Has she traveled before by plane or would this be the first time?
What type of mental illness does she have - Alzheimers? Depression?
Is she paranoid at all? (If she is, she may have a lot of difficulty in dealing with unknown people in an unknown environment and especially in dealing with the screening at the airport).
What kind of unit is she in at the Nursing Home- i.e. locked or unlocked? (I would not take someone who lives in a locked unit)
Would she be likely to keep a name/ID/Medic Alert bracelet on? (this would be very important in case she gets lost)
How does she react to stress?
How does she react to changes in her routine or environment?
How does she react to new people?
How does she react to people telling her no?
Is she confused?
Does she remember things she is told to do - who people are, etc?
Does she do anything that might hurt herself or others (hitting, scratching, etc) or that is not socially acceptable?
What kind of monitoring of meals does she need?
Does she need reminders for daily things like using the bathroom, etc. or is she totally independent?
How fast is she (important if she gets away from her supervisor)?
If she gets lost, is she capable of knowing she is lost and getting help or is she likely to just keep wandering?
What about night? Does she sleep well? If she gets up during the night, is she likely to stay awake in her bed or might she wander?
Is her diabetes pretty well controlled?
Is she on a stable dose of insulin or would the person need to be making adjustments to the insulin?
What about doing blood sugar testing?
You said she can't do the injections herself, but is she cooperative with it?
Is she on any other medications and is she cooperative with taking them?

Since she can walk, she could get away from the person who is supervising her if they are not watching every second. That means more than one person because she really needs to be supervised 24 hours.
I would not leave her alone with someone she is not familiar with. It might be possible to have someone unfamiliar to her being 'in charge' of supervising her as long as there is always someone who she knows and feels comfortable with her too. Since she could get lost (or possibly wander off) 2 people always knowing where she is would be much safer. I think that her supervision sounds like too much responsibility for a teenager, even if they are not totally responsible for her. A college student in some health related field might work, but, again, I think there should always be someone who knows her with.
Because of the diabetes and the need to give insulin, you may find that you actually need a nurse. You might be able to get by with a family member being instructed and able to do it. I would not expect a teenager or even a college student to do the insulin or testing.

 

[SueM in MN]

One last thing I forgot, you need to get her doctors on board and in agreement with your plan (the Social Worker would be included in that). If she goes against medical advice (AMA), she will probably not be able to go back to the nursing home.

 

[minkydog]

I just want to reiterate everything Sue said. The suggestion of having a teenager or student care for her, which I know was well-meaning, just about set my hair standing on end (I'm an RN, as well) This situation sounds pretty complicated and will take a LOT of planning to pull off. If it proves to much, perhaps you could have your Disney wedding and then later go to her residential facility and have a nice reception, complete with your dress and wedding cake.