OT- Birthday Party Question

[PrncessA]

I just booked my kiddos' first "real" birthday party. Up until now we have always held family parties with a few close friends so no invitations or expectations.

Now that they have little friends we are throwing their birthdays together (Feb. 12 and March 28th) and having their party at Monkey Joe's. They are super excited about it!

Here is my question...

Although we don't expect gifts I know I always feel weird attending a party without bringing at least a small gift even if the invitation says gifts not expected. The kids do not need or want new toys but I am sure some other parents feel the same way as I do and can't come empty handed.

I would like to include on the invitation something like, "Gifts are not necessary. Books are appreciated."

I really don't want to come off as asking for presents for the kids but I also do not want parents to waste their money on toys that will get forgotten in the toy box and books get a lot of use in our house. Does it sound rude?

I really don't have much experience with this!

 

[Rylee]

Although it may not be considered proper etiquette, it my not be socially incorrect, either.

When I RSVP to invitations my children receive, I always ask what the child would like... most people give me answer.

And, if they don't give me an answer... I have my child who is attending the party, choose the gift for the birthday girl/boy. They usually know the child better than I do, and are quite thoughtful when choosing the present.

 

[PrncessA]

I am thinking about not including anything on the invite and if people ask I will tell them a book. Most of the parents are friends so it isn't akward.

 

[mjkacmom]

I really don't think it is appropriate to mention anything related to gifts on the invitation. I convinced my kids not to have parties this year, and we'd go to great wolf lodge instead, partly because of not wanting gifts (my twins are in different classes this year, so a pretty big guest list). A lot of people are just giving gc's now.

 

[PollyannaMom]

I am thinking about not including anything on the invite and if people ask I will tell them a book. Most of the parents are friends so it isn't akward.

This is what I would do.

 

[courtneylauren]

another idea would be to write "in leiu of gifts, please bring ______ to donate to _____ (shelter, donation organization, etc)

 

[Samar]

Definitely ask the birthday parent. If you're unsure, a gift card to a book store or TRU would be a nice gift because the child would have the option of either book or toy

 

[MSSANDRA]

I would not mention gifts at all. If parents call to RSVP and ask, it is fine to let them know your wants. When you mention a donation, we have found many parents bring both. Also some kids will not bring the child a gift and get upset because they did not bring a gift but others did. Great idea in theory but just does not always work out.