new awkward solo trip

Discussion in 'Disney for Adults and Solo Travelers' started by margot31, Sep 17, 2018.

  1. margot31

    margot31 DIS Veteran

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    So I normally go with someone. I am not one to really do much w/out someone actually. Just my own personal preference. Mama needs a break from everything I have two monsters (4 & 2) and its been a long few weeks.

    So how do you go from normally people and being that awkward feeling in the first place of going most anywhere alone. I have read of people having a blast and all but not sure if there is anyone else like me is isn't very good at the solo thing as well and how things turned out.
     
  2. BrianL

    BrianL Doom Buggy Driver

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    Well, it just kind of depends on how independent you are in the first place. I do things alone all the time. I've been single for pretty much my entire life, and with my group of friends and such, if I didn't go do things solo I'd never do them at all. They are just not interested in doing certain thing or doing them as often as I would like to and have the means to. So, I just roll with it. I'd say I generally prefer to have company with me when I go to Disney, but I certainly still have fun solo. The experience is going to vary from person to person.

    I would encourage you to at least try it for a short trip. Maybe try to do some different things that you wouldn't normally do when you have others with you. The great thing about solo trips is that you set the pace and you do what you want to. It may not be for you, but if you just do a couple days, what's the harm?
     
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  4. margot31

    margot31 DIS Veteran

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    Well like I said i have a 4 and 2 year old....whats this being alone thing in the first place. So if I were to do this alone it is even more awkward for me as I have my monsters with me all the time. Sure I get a break here and there but its more like oh i go to target alone or something but never actually fun things alone.
     
  5. brad813

    brad813 DIS Veteran

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    The first thing you need to remember is there is nothing wrong with going solo. It's all about what you want to do, and nobody really bats an eyelash about anyone solo at Disney, even at the water parks. Just remember you may need to make reservations for two and then drop them down to one person if you make reservations. You are there to enjoy yourself, and at the end of the day that is all that matters.
     
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  6. xlsm

    xlsm Snow White

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    I am a solo trip survivor (also a mom, my boys are 15 and 13), and planning another one for the spring. Yes, it's weird to be on your own, yes I was sad and missed my family, but I had planned meet ups with a Disboards friend, got to see Wishes one last time, and got to actually relax! I got over being nervous about ADRs alone VERY quickly when I realized if I had to eat only QS meals I'd be so unhappy. I had a BOG lunch (easy alone! booked about 15 minutes ahead of time via the app), a Boma breakfast, and even a Tiffins ROL dinner package. I stayed at AKL in a savanna room and enjoyed just sitting out on the balcony and watching the animals in peace. I could take my time and do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted.

    It gave me a chance to miss my family and for them to miss me. There's a TR in my signature if you're curious (it is the May 2017 one). WDW is the one place I knew I'd be fine on my own, since I know it so well anyway and feel comfortable there. I am naturally independent though, and I know not everyone enjoys being by themselves. It was originally supposed to be a trip where I took my mother-in-law, soooo...it worked out better in the end :rotfl:

    Enjoy your trip!!
     
  7. indoshakespeare

    indoshakespeare Reach out and find your Happily Ever After

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    Try having lunch/dinner or going to a movie by yourself to see if it feels weird. if you can do it, you can survive Disney solo
     
  8. margot31

    margot31 DIS Veteran

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    when I am out running errands I do lunch and its not my cup of tea....so no matter what I do if i were to sit on the beach or anything it would be awkward cause I haven't been "alone" in several years. Ok maybe the beach I could do for a few hours but from being with people for years now its almost become awkward to do things alone.
     
  9. BrianL

    BrianL Doom Buggy Driver

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    It sounds like going solo might be difficult for you. Maybe you could try to take a quick break somewhere, even just a few towns over for a night and see how you feel about that. Certainly doing WDW alone is not for everybody. You can always try to meet some DIS friends for meetups. There are threads all over the Adults/Solo board.
     
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  10. xlsm

    xlsm Snow White

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    Purely out of nosy curiosity...what makes it feel awkward to you? Is it just like you don't know what to do with yourself, or because you think people are looking at you funny b/c you're alone, or what? Bringing a book or e-reader along is a good option - especially if you're bench-sitting and start to feel awkward. It gives you something to do with your hands! (but remember, any awkwardness is in your own head, no one else is going to care what you're doing. they'll be too busy looking for churros or trying to get to a FP, or trying to convince a member of their party to meet a princess)

    I agree with the others who say to "practice" by going to a movie or something. You need to learn to feel comfortable hanging out with yourself and discovering who you are as a person. You're not just someone's wife and mother, you have your own identity. It's easy to lose that when you have little ones at home.

    (editing to clarify, b/c I don't want it to come off sounding wrong, of course you don't HAVE to learn to feel comfortable alone/"discover" yourself, I just meant in the context of preparing for a Disney solo visit. I know for me, when I was a toddler mom, I was completely wrapped up in them, I barely knew my own name! That won't be the case with every parent, be it mom or dad)

    Good luck, and if you decide on a solo trip, awesome! If not, that's awesome too - there's a fine line between stepping outside of your comfort zone and diving off the comfort zone cliff. You want to go and have fun, not go and be miserable. Baby steps are still steps, and they'll get you somewhere eventually :grouphug:
     
    Last edited: Sep 18, 2018
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  11. Bete

    Bete DIS Veteran

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    As long as you have your cell phone you really are not alone. You may feel more comfortable connecting with someone here and there back home.

    Doing a shorter trip the first time might be best for you.

    There's enough to do at Disney to keep you very busy. Make a plan to do many activities each day.

    You can do group eating at Biergarten and Teppan Edo in Epcot's World Showcase.
    Doing quick service meals seems easier when you are alone.

    Do some tours where you are in groups.

    Do some special events like the luncheon with an Imagineer. Again, you are in a group for it.

    Take in more shows; since, that's a group situation.

    I found myself talking to a lot people when waiting in lines. Say something nice about someone's kid and you will get instant conversation.

    Maybe, go when D-23 is having a get together. There are other Disney groups that get together, too.

    I'm being frank, here:
    It sounds like you are setting yourself up not to enjoy yourself. If it's not for you then don't do it or do something else on a smaller scale to get away.
     
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  12. sanapp

    sanapp DIS Veteran

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    I have never done a solo trip, but have my first one planned in February. I have a 15 year old who has done everything with me and has always been my Disney buddy (husband doesn’t enjoy going). I have had a very difficult year and my daughter has really pushed me to take some time for myself. Disney is the only place my husband was really comfortable with me going by myself. I had considered Mexico, but he was very uncomfortable with that.
    I know I will miss my daughter a great deal, but I think I will still be able to enjoy myself.
    I have made 2 ADRs a day and I will bring a journal to write in and a book to read. I think there will be more to keep me busy such as people watching. I even booked the dlxdp, so I know my meals will be lengthy.
    I am sure I will not always be comfortable, but it will be okay
     
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  13. fla4fun

    fla4fun DIS Veteran

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    I agree that if you don’t feel comfortable doing things alone in your daily life, then a solo trip may not be your thing. That’s OK. You don’t need to feel bad if a solo trip isn’t high on your priority list.

    I love my solo trips, but I spend a lot of time on my own day to day. A big part of why is that I work an unconventional schedule. My days off are Wednesday through Friday, so I am working on the weekends when most people are off, and vice versa. I also get six weeks vacation, where most of my family and friends get one or two. So I usually book four WDW solo trips and two elsewhere trips. My first trip to Europe was solo. If I feel the need to interact I can always share a funny photo text. At Disney, I find the CMs tend to interact more when they find out you’re a party of one.

    Only you know whether it will be relaxing or stressful to travel solo. Do what feels right for you.
     
  14. margot31

    margot31 DIS Veteran

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    I think as someone mentioned its what to do with myself. For the last 4 years I have pretty much had someone with me at ALL times. If not I am simply running a few small errands that i tend to make very fast cause just out of habit of kids can only go so long in target or what ever store.

    It would be a short trip as my husband works and that is the only support we have as far as family. So he can't take time off. We only live 3 hours away too.
     
  15. Shelly F - Ohio

    Shelly F - Ohio Disney Extraordinaire

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    It is weird but you will love it. Go at your pace not the pace of the family. Have no responsibilities is great. you may find yourself wanting to stay longer. I really never felt alone. You will have CM to talk to. I did buffet dinners so you don't have the awkward sitting alone time while waiting for your meal. A few CM chatted for awhile with me during my meals. You will love it. GO!
     
  16. b5sgqueen

    b5sgqueen Earning My Ears

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    I have traveled to several countries by myself as well as Disneyland, and, hopefully, DW in Spring. I never thought I would do that, but my father died right after I graduated and we had had a plan to travel somewhere "far away." I still wanted to but no one else I knew wanted to come with. I felt like my dad wanted me to go so I went off to China by myself...and loved it. Couldn't believe how amazing it was to do whatever I wanted. Tried at 1pm? Nap please. Feel like ice cream at 8am? Yes, I will have two scoops.

    Here's the thing I realized, no one care that you are by yourself. I don't mean that cruelly, I mean I used to spend time thinking that people were looking at me funny or pitying me or something until I realized that everyone is caught up in themselves. No one will judge you.
    Don't believe me? Test it out. Next time you go anywhere, movies, lunch, wherever, look around and see if there are people by themselves. Would you have eve notice them unless you had been looking? Do they look unhappy, are other people pointing to them? No.

    I very much enjoy traveling by myself and even have problems going with others. I love the freedom to choose what to do when, and, from the Disneyland perspective, it made getting FP so much easier. I even got into a restaurant that had no open reservations and was turning people away.

    I'm not saying it can't get lonely, but, remember, you don't have to go for 10 days or even a week. Just a few days could be fine.

    That said, traveling by yourself is not for everyone. I have very good friends, who I considered fearless and extremely capable, who have told me time and again that they would never go by themselves. That's as valid a choice as anything else.

    I would suggest going to a movie or dinner on your own and see how you feel. Take your phone, a book or magazine and see if it's ok. If not, ask yourself why. Do you miss your kids? Maybe solo travel is still good for you but you really don't want to be away from them at the moment. Do you feel awkward? Again, no one notices or thinks you're weird at all. See how many people dine together but say very little to one another. If you just feel like you hate having to do these things alone, then you may have to think that it's not for you, but I would say, try nonetheless and you may be surprised how much you love it.

    When I went to Disneyland, I actually took a few notes for a trip report. It gave me something to do while waiting in line. I would pull out a little notebook, check my watch, and note wait times(because I'm a nerd like that). I heard people whispering about how I must be a reporter or a secret shopper or something. Doing something like that focusing you and gives you something to do.
     
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  17. jsmla

    jsmla DIS Veteran

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    I was very, very hesitant to go solo for the first time. My husband backed out last minute on a lot of prepaid and non-transferable reservations that I just couldn't stand to lose. Our kids were 19 and 22 but I was primary care giver to my father in law with Alzheimer's and really needed the break.

    I'm not gonna lie-it was super awkward for me at first. Meals and lines were the hardest for me so I avoided them as much as possible those first few solo trips. It did get easier with repeat visits and I've gradually learned to stand in a line or eat in a restaurant just like a big girl :-). My phone is key to this-I always feel more comfortable if I can occupy myself with something.

    I found that the initial awkwardness was more than compensated for by the freedom to do whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. For instance, I'm by nature a very early riser and was in heaven hitting every morning EMH without dealing with my night owl DH. I can ride Everest 5 X in a row if I want to and skip Star Anything if so inclined. It's great!
     
  18. amyngary

    amyngary Mouseketeer

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    I'm doing my first solo trip in 2 weeks. Yes, I'm a little nervous, but I want to push myself out of my comfort zone. I've been going to movies alone for a year, and I often eat dinner alone when out shopping (usually at the bar of a nice restaurant). So I plan to eat at some of the nicer bars/lounges at WDW, as well as grazing around Food and Wine festival. I'm sure there will be ups and downs, but since I'm divorced and love to travel, I need to get past it. WDW is the perfect place for me to get my feet wet. I'm heading to St. Lucia for a longer trip in November, so this WDW trip is another step in practicing for me.

    I will mention that, I started posting on the solo board a week or so ago, but I haven't found anyone whose dates match mine yet. So I'm going on the assumption I will be alone the entire trip. I find that bartenders (when time allows) talk to people who are eating alone. I'll also have my kindle at times, and my cell phone to read news, etc. If I start to feel awkward, I can always just hang out at the pool with my kindle. THAT I know I enjoy alone, lol!

    I'm sharing all of this to say that you are not alone. But as long as you are OK with ups and downs in life, you will be fine. And you'll likely enjoy most of the trip. I say go for it!
     
  19. brewhome

    brewhome DIS Veteran

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    I had a solo day at the World just last Sunday. I was going to Tampa for some work training so I flew in early the day before, drove to DS, hung out there for a while, and then went to my first ever MNSSHP. It did feel weird at first not to be there with my family, but it was also very cool because I could just go at my own pace, browse the shops as long as I wanted, eat when I wanted, ride whatever I wanted, etc. I felt I had more time to take pics vs. rushing off to the next thing.

    I found that people were very nice. I talked to several people in lines, and the CM’s were great. You can tell that they see people going solo all of the time. It was really, really hot so I did take a break to sit down at the bar at Splitsville and watch some football over a beer. The three different groups of people around me at the bar were super nice and we all chatted for quite a while, and I stayed longer than I expected to. When I had lunch at Earl of Sandwich, I browsed social media and texted with my family while I ate, and that was absolutely fine, too. And... I ate an entire dole whip by myself with no one dipping their spoon in! Aaaaaaahhhh.....

    I can see myself going on a solo trip in the future, probably attached to a work trip. If they are paying for my flights anyway, I might as well take advantage of it because I’d only have to cover my hotel room and food for my personal travel days. I think for me two or three nights would be good... enough to do everything I want to do and not so long that I’d miss my family too much.

    My opinion is that it will be what you make of it... if you go in with the thought that you’re going to have fun, then you will! If you go in thinking you will be lonely or feel weird, then you will. The place itself has great opportunities for solo travelers.
     
  20. Simba's Mom

    Simba's Mom <font color=green>everything went to "H*** in a ha

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    What's funny is that although I have no problem going to WDW solo (just came back from my 15th+ trip) and never mind being solo there, I feel awkward around town here solo. I guess I'm afraid I'll see someone I know and they might feel bad for me. At WDW, I don't care.
     
  21. TexanInTheMidwest

    TexanInTheMidwest Earning My Ears

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    One of the best things we can do for ourselves as women (and humans) is to learn to find solace in our own company. I know it can feel challenging. However, it's a skill we all need to learn.

    My children are now grown and flown (27 and 23) but I remember the days of just wanting do something simple, like go to the bathroom alone. ;-)

    Last year, my husband and I we went to WDW for a few days and then my husband had to teach a course in another part of Orlando. I went back to Magic Kingdom on my own for a day and it was the BEST THING EVER. I treated the entire thing as an "Artist Date" (for anyone whom has read Julia Cameron's The Artist's Way).

    I sauntered down main street, made friends waiting for rope drop and then rode the Mine Train with them. Then, went off to wander around - riding whatever I wanted, stopping for lunch at Be Our Guest, and lingering. It was so freeing not to worry about anyone else having a good time. It was just me and it was marvelous!
     
    Last edited: Sep 30, 2018
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