My Grandpa's sick, but wont tell anyone what's wrong..

[Herbie'sGal]

I'm not sure what to do. These past several weeks weve noticed a change in my grandpa. His my mom's father, and she's realy upset about this.
They know something is wrong but he wont say what's wrong. He says it's selfish of him but he still wont say what's wrong. And he also doesn't want to do anything about it.
Now my mom and her sister belive that he has cancer possibly in his eshopgas. and they've come to the conclusion that his dying.
I know this will happen someday, but if his sick shouldn't he tell us what's wrong?
My grandpa has been in the hospital and talking to doctors several times and wont let grandma come in to doctor's office so she doesn't even know what's wrong.
I'm not sure what i can do or what i should do. thanks for listening.

 

[Heidict]

Ugh, sometimes family can be frustrating, can't they?

I can think of 2 reason as to why he would be doing this.

He doesn't want anyone to worry. He doesn't realize though, that by keeping quiet about it when it is obvious that EVERYONE knows something is wrong, he is only making your minds spin out of control with the worst possible scenario.

Now, this doesn't mean he has incurable cancer or anything like that, but often times a person feels that if they can keep it quiet, fight whatever it is and beat it then they can just get back to living and everyone will be fine with it. Nobody was worried or fussing over them.

He could also be coming to grips with the news that he received and is not ready to tell anyone. Maybe he is waiting to get all the news, both good and bad from the doctor, prior to telling anyone?

It could also just be nothing. Maybe his mood change is due to some other reason?

Unfortunately, there isn't much you can do. You certainly can't force him to tell people what is wrong, and with HIPAA laws as they are, the doctor won't speak to his wife or any other family member.

Just be supportive of him and let him know that you are there for him, no matter what. Be supportive of your grandmother, I can imagine this must be very frustrating and scary for her. Hope everything turns out okay.

 

[minniebeth]

Heidict said everything very well, that I was thinking. I agree, it's frustrating, but just be there loving and supporting.