My daughter broke up with her Boyfriend

[RosieRosie]

and is not talking about it but I can see that she is sometimes sad. She is 17 years old and this was her first serious boyfriend. How long can her sadness last? What can I do if she doesn't want to talk about it?

 

[mommytotwo]

I wouldn't push her into talking cause maybe she doesn't want to really speak up about it, but just be there for her. Maybe you could have mother daughter outtings so that she can take her mind of the breakup. I know that first loves always stick out even though you have other boyfriends. Hope she finds someone in the future that will treat her nice.

 

[grinningghost]

You know your daughter best. Is she the type to share her problems with you, or does she prefer to work things out for herself? If she generally wears her heart on her sleeve, then a nice motherly hug and an offer to talk would be good.

Otherwise, just try to cheer her up by maybe taking her out for some ice cream or to rent a movie.

It's so hard to see our kids sad, isn't it?

 

[EsmeraldaX]

Couple of weeks maybe?

My first serious boyfriend and I borke up when I was 16 (yikes that was a long time ago) and I recall being bummed out for a few weeks and then I moved on.

I never think about him now so that old saying that you never forget your first love....I can't recall anything about the guy other than vaguely what he looked like...

She'll be okay.

to her & I agree...do fun mom/daughter things with her to help take her mind off it.

 

[shortbun]

Tell her you are there if she needs you. Take her for a ride
and talk about something else while listening to music. sometimes
it's easier to talk when you don't have to look right at someone.
Hope her heartache is eased soon.

 

[NHAnn]

It's hard...for your DD of course, but for you as a mom too. As grinningghost said, it's so hard to see our kids sad.

My dd's sadness lasted months...not as deep and constant after the first few weeks, but definitely still obvious at times, for a long time.

Just let her know you love her, that you're there for her if she wants to talk, respect her wishes if she doesn't want to talk...

Maybe keep an eye out that she doesn't get isolated . One thing I noticed with DD's circle of friends was that sometimes if a girl had been so serious for a long time that she didn't consistently spend time with "the girls" or groups....after a break up it was hard to insert themselves back into the "single girls" social life....others get out of the habit of checking if a girl wants to join them after she's consistently turned them down in favor of her boyfriend....they just assume she's busy. I'd encourage her (without nagging or pressuring) to get out and do things with friends if she doesn't start doing it on her own.

Hopefully your DD has some understanding girlfriends or older siblings/aunts or friends to help her through this time, I know that was a big help for my DD.

Hugs to you both!

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Go out and have some fun with her! Cheering up is probably the only thing you can do.

 

[deirdrefitch]

I have done this in reverse with my boys. Listen, give lots of hugs, tell her you are there if she needs you, and then her a little space to mourn the relationship she had. This has sometimes lasted for three-four weeks. Eventually, everything turns around and happiness reigns. This is very hard on Moms and Dads!
Good luck, and I will be thinking of you.

 

[Keli]

It's reasonable for her to be sad for a few weeks and if it was an especially long or intense relationship maybe a month or even two.

It's really hard as a mama to stand by and see your child be sad and know there's really not anything you can do to make it better, isn't it?

 

[CBRorBust]

How long can her sadness last?

Depends on why they broke up and how serious they were.

What can I do if she doesn't want to talk about it?

Respect her privacy and let her come to you when and if she wants to talk about it.


Hugs! I know this is just as hard on you as it is on her right now!