Lord grant me strength!

[BabyTigger99]

I am now a full time step mom! DSD13 moved up on Saturday. Her mom left to join the military.

 

[Poohnatic]

Congrats! I think you need a care package of Calgon, lol!

Suzanne

 

[BabyTigger99]

First two nights have gone good so far, except for a disagreement last night. She has off of school on Friday, and I asked her last week if she wanted to watch DS (he is in 1st grade) on that day. She said fine. Last night she came up with the brilliant idea that she wanted to go back to her hometown and sleep over at a friend's house on Thursday night (nevermind the fact that the friend still has school on Friday, and she lives an hour and a half away!). She wasn't happy that she couldn't go, and said she never agreed to babysit, but realized that she wasn't going to win the arguement, and is going to babysit. I think the lure of the almighty dollar is what won her over!

Things should get interesting, schoolwise. She has a bad habit of not turing work in, and not studying for tests, which does NOT fly in our house!

 

[lindakmonty]

Good luck lots of p& pd to you

 

[Serena]

I hope things get settled soon.

 

[mickeyboat]

Best of luck to you and your family. I am so glad things are working out, and that you and your DH "got" your step-daughter. You're doing a great job. Keep us informed.

Denae

 

[4nana]

Hope things fall into place in short order and she realizes how lucky she is to have you and her Dad in her life .

 

[Hedy]

 

[BabyTigger99]

And so the fun begins. She supposedly hates school (today was the first day), says she is dropping out and never going back. She and DH are having a "discussion" about things right now.

 

[3princesses+aprince]

Good Luck with your stepdaughter, I have a 10 year old stepson so I know sometimes things can be tough! The move is probably a hard thing for her to deal with right now, everything is different, school, rules etc..

 

[golfgal]

Things should get interesting, schoolwise. She has a bad habit of not turing work in, and not studying for tests, which does NOT fly in our house!

That doesn't fly in our house either but it has taken DS14 about 14 years to figure that out . Good luck with your DSD and remember, there is nothing worse on the face of the earth then a 13 year old girl so if you get through this year you have it made in the shade!!!!

 

[mrsheppo]

OMG I feel your pain. My 12 yo stepson moved in 2 weeks ago. His mom called and told us to take him. He hasn't attended school full time in 1 1/2 years. He has been enrolled in 6th grade and today the school called us to say testing showed him reading at a 2nd grade level. He didn't go to school when living with mom because she never disciplined him or his brothers and sister. His 18 yo brother dropped out in 4th grade and never went back. We were not allowed to help him and we are not going to let the same happen with this one.

His mom said she wanted him to come stay with us and now she calls each night to get him upset and he cries he wants to go home. If that happens, he will drop out also. He wants to talk baby talk which is very hard to tolerate from a 12 yo. Mom also is never home and the older siblings ignore him. He just wants to sit and watch cartoons and play video games.

He doesn't like the fact that here at our house there are chores, rules and homework. We really want him to succeed and it's going to be a long hard road.

 

[Cindyluwho]

Oh, I hope you have a wonderful time! It sounds like you and your DH are working together as a team so it should be fine. I'm kind of an expert on this, as I've had 4 step-mothers. Yes, FOUR!!! My current step-mom is my aunt so I'm kinda my own cousin. I've seen all kinds of step mom behavior and my favorite stepmothers have been the ones that included me as family just as they would their own children. Same rules, same rewards, etc. It sounds like you're definately on the right track and here's a great big

 

[BabyTigger99]

Well, things are a little better this morning. I had to take her shopping last night to get some gym shorts after I got home from teaching dance, so it gave us a chance to talk. She did start opening up and telling me about some friends that she made, and we downloaded AIM because two of them had given her their screen names (unfortunatly, she forgot the screen names at school!). Then she and I sat together and worked through her homework (DH had tried, but she was having a big meltdown while he was attempting to help her). Hopefully, each day will get a little easier for her. I think one of the biggest transition is the size of the school. Her old middle school had 250 kids, the new school has over 1200! A little bit of culture shock there!

 

[kdibattista]

Sounds like she is going through quite a transition right now. You seem to be a great influence on her.

Good luck

 

[lindakmonty]

Glad you got to get away and have some time together. I'm sure it'll take some adjusting for everyone. Good luck and I'm sure it'll get better for all of you w/time. Its good to hear she's making friends too. Hopefully that will encourage her She is lucky to have a step mom that cares! My step dad was a jerk and made huge differences between me and my sister and his own two kids...finally I went and lived w/my grandparents. I'm so glad I did though. It was a much better place for me. Maybe she'd like to meet some new friends on the teen board here? She might enjoy that...but then again...if she knows your screen name

Good luck

 

[golfgal]

Is she interested in any sports, drama, anything she can join at school? I would suggest getting her into something very soon. That is a GREAT way to make new friends in a new school. Also, suggest to her today that she invite one of these girls over this weekend or maybe they could go to a movie or something with a couple of them this weekend. Let her know you will drive both ways. It would be a good thing also to get her started with some new friends.