Long Fathers Day vent (opinions needed)

[ez]

ON Fathers Day we all go out to eat, my parents, brother(31), DH & my 2 kids. My husband(49) plays in a band, and up until a couple months ago, my brother played drums for the band. The band leader who owns all the equipment, had a falling out with my brother over his chronic lateness to jobs and the fact that he would never be there to help set up or tear down equipment(the other 2 guys in the band are over 50)So anyway, my brother is no longer in the band.
What does this have to do with Fathers Day, you may ask??
Well, I was trying to get dinner plans together this past week, and I was wondering why my mom was being real noncommital and odd. Turns out, they were going out to eat with my brother, but we aren't invited because apparently my brother is uncomfortable with my husband over this band thing.
My take on this is, my brother is a grown man and it is really a slap in the face to me (not that I'm not used to it, believe me) that they didn't just do the traditional fathers day thing, and if he didn't want to go, fine, but he is 31 years old, and they still coddle him like he is a 10 year old. I am really leaving out lots of details for brevities sake, but what do you guys think of this? Thanks for allowing me to vent!!!

 

[PammyK]

I think your parents should have told your brother to grow up and get over it. If they are unwilling to do so its their loss to not spend Father's Day with you.

 

[TIdoublegaER]

I think your mom should have just been up front with you from the start and I think she should have told your brother that if he didn't want to go that was his problem. BUT, my mother would have done the same thing. When DH graduated with his Bachelor's and Master's last Dec., my brother was stuck in traffic on the interstate, so she didn't come to the graduation. Why did that prevent her from attending? My dad didn't want to go to begin with and wanted to stay home to see my brother. And then they wonder why my sister and I think he is the favorite!

 

[momsal]

I would be upset also!!!!

Your brother needs to grow up!
And it is totally unfair of your Mother to choose your Brother over you and your family on Fathers Day!!!

 

[4greatboys]

I would be very upset too. They should have stuck with the tradition and eaten with all their children, not just one, and then to not even have told you is just wrong.