Just back.....Saw the Otter

If you were a real man, you'd have used the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.
 
You are absolutely right...and I had been carrying one around in my wallet for years, ya know, just in case the opportunity ever came up I didnt want to be unprotected. You wait and wait for the perfect moment, and when it finally arrives, ya blow it just that quick!!!:sad2:
 
...And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O Lord, bless this Thy hand grenade that with it Thou mayest blow Thine enemies to tiny bits, in Thy mercy." And the Lord did grin and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats and large chu... [At this point, the friar is urged by Brother Maynard to "skip a bit, brother"]... And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin, then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it." Amen.
 

NTSammy is dead on!

Three shall be the number, the number shall be three.
 
I'm not touching this one:rotfl2: :rotfl2: :rotfl2: :rotfl2: Great story I'm :rotfl2: :rotfl2: :rotfl2: still
 
...And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O Lord, bless this Thy hand grenade that with it Thou mayest blow Thine enemies to tiny bits, in Thy mercy." And the Lord did grin and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats and large chu... [At this point, the friar is urged by Brother Maynard to "skip a bit, brother"]... And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin, then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it." Amen.
Ok...I give...whats that from...Life of Brian? MPython's HolyGrail? I know its very Mel Brooksish.
 
The Holy Grail. It's the first thing I thought of when I read your story.
 















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