In Search of My Body....Not the One I ATE! Vol. 5: Goddesses are Always on Top!

[goofyfan-12]

Okay, GREAT article! And I took the Self quiz - there's a link - and it put me at 153.1, which is pretty much my goal!

And yes, yes, yes. You are right on about the weekend, and how hard you work, and where you are. Gold stars for seeing yourself as fab.

Cool about the quiz putting you at the goal you want to be. I need to take the quiz yet. Hoping to do that at lunch time. Thanks for the kind words. I hope I am not blathering on too much about my struggle, but if what I am going through can help someone else (lurkers - that would be you... come out and play) than it is worthwhile right?

I loved what you wrote on your page for the race. It is so true. That whole ask thing is hard, but when you can tie it into something that is meaningful for them, it becomes a whole lot easier for them to open up and give. I'll be sending my money in today as well. If we can save even one more life, than it is more than worth it.

I am so proud of you for what you are doing. Many would turn inwards, whine, suffer and general feel sorry for themselves (and rightfully so). You and your mom are not only fighting, but taking a stand, fighting back and doing more so that others won't have to. What is a better message to send to Emily? I can't think of one because she has two of the strongest role models out there right smack front and center in her life. Emily truly is one lucky girl.

Paula

 

[princessrunner]

My ideal is 126.6 unless I allow myself a treat, then it is 127.8.

 

[zigzagzerr]

Alrighty, the details!
He TM'd me on the way over to his house saying he had an idea of what he wanted to do with his hair. When I left, I had big time flutters going on. Sigh!

Hooray for flutters!

7) Picking a small university, despite acceptances from prestigious ones, is the best decision you'll ever make. It will guide you through life and be one of the most precious links to happiness. Really. Listen to me on that. Good for you. You knew somehow.


10) Fair thin freckled skin should never get in a tanning competition with friends.

Yep and yep.

A-MEN to that! We have a "little system" moving thru early today that is supposed to give us 1-3" of snow, then the "big storm" tonight/tomorrow that is expected to dump an additional 10-15".

My kids will be in school until the 4th of friggin' July!

We didn't get as huge an amount as you, but about halfway to work this morning, I'm thinking "Are you crazy? Why are you out here?". At that point, I was more afraid to turn around and go back -- people were sliding all over the road, tons of cars in the ditch, super yikes! Fortunately, it's supposed to get better by the end of the day when we're all heading home.

And you're right -- the kids will never get out for summer vacation this year.

I'm just so over snow right now.

Yes indeedy.

Ok, race report time!
THEN, the skies opened up. OMG. We were facing about 20+ MPH crosswinds and headwinds and wind driven rain.

You are one tough mama!! Congrats on the race!

Shelby is also in the market for an 8th grade prom dress. She went last year with her 8th grade boyfriend.

Luckily, my daughter still thinks boys are icky. She is going with a girlfriend of hers who is also tomboyish. They're going to hang out and giggle at everybody. It's interesting, though -- my daughter was totally into trying on the dresses. This is a child who won't wear a dress ever. We're going with both girls next weekend to pick something out.


Send the spring vibes this way, please -- maybe it'll melt the snow! Have a good day, guys.

 

[goofyfan-12]

Just took the quiz and they say my happy weight is in the 130's. Yikes that's a long ways away. I better get a move on and start sweating off some more calories if I am ever going to get there...

Most of you know that I don't have a specific number in mind - mainly because it is such a big number that it is overwhelming. Right now, I want to hit the fifty pound mark and then start working on the next fifty. I tend to focus on 10 pound increments though to keep me sane. Maybe I should use Kelly's reference of stones instead. It is a whole lot less daunting to say a few stones...

 

[DisneyWorld Delight]

Oh oh oh I want to join in, just don't have time today. Wanted to say I love the volly here today. Love it.

 

[3DisneyKids]

Stay and play, Lyz!

 

[DisneyWorld Delight]

Ha - that's peer pressure.

Have to be ready for a 5:30 meeting which I will rush then to funeral home.

Oh, do you know what tomorrow is?

 

[HockeyKat]

Maybe I will sound insensitive here, but there are worse things at 14 than being athletic, fit, into sports and having lots of friends and boys that are interested in you. I wasn't allowed to play sports due to the rheumatoid, and not playing sports where I went to school, unless you were beautiful and popular (I wasn't), pretty much delegated you to the misfit table. I don't even think I HAD a boy touch my back until I was a year or so into college.

Also, I would love if somsone said I skated like a boy.... one of my biggest pet peeves is any kind of insult that compares a male athlete to a girl. To me, saying that you play like a boy = compliment, not insult.


Liz, .

Paula, definitely not obese. Glad Jesse realizes it too.

 

[SeptemberGirl]

Cool about the quiz putting you at the goal you want to be. I need to take the quiz yet. Hoping to do that at lunch time. Thanks for the kind words. I hope I am not blathering on too much about my struggle, but if what I am going through can help someone else (lurkers - that would be you... come out and play) than it is worthwhile right?

I loved what you wrote on your page for the race. It is so true. That whole ask thing is hard, but when you can tie it into something that is meaningful for them, it becomes a whole lot easier for them to open up and give. I'll be sending my money in today as well. If we can save even one more life, than it is more than worth it.

I am so proud of you for what you are doing. Many would turn inwards, whine, suffer and general feel sorry for themselves (and rightfully so). You and your mom are not only fighting, but taking a stand, fighting back and doing more so that others won't have to. What is a better message to send to Emily? I can't think of one because she has two of the strongest role models out there right smack front and center in her life. Emily truly is one lucky girl.

Paula

I do turn inwards. And to peanut butter cups! (See my ticker!) But never, ever, feel sorry for myself. Sad, yes. But not sorry. I have a great life and a great mom. I just want her to live longer.

I don't know about being a good role model - it's selfish. I want the women in my life to have a better chance. I want them to be educated and know their options and live lifestyles that are active and might help prevent breast cancer. I want this for me, because they are so important to me.

But yes, don't we all want all grandparents to have lots of time with their grandchildren? Don't we all want people everywhere to live in good health, peace, and safety? And wouldn't any one of us do whatever we could to make that happen?

If I had money, I'd start a foundation. I hope one day I can do real work and fundraising and help people. But now I do what I dread, what's hard for me, what challenges me, because it is the LEAST I can do.

It feels so small in comparison.

You are not going on too much. That is what this thread is for!!!

Liz, That's all I can say. I run for my dad, because he can't do anything anymore. You are doing such a wonderful thing!

Erika, for you too. It is hard sometimes being unsure of yourself and the power within. My heart aches for Shelby a lot. She will do pullups in the gym and boys will literally stop and stare. She wants to curl in a ball and die. It is painful. Hard to tell her to celebrate her strength and embrace the talent she has inside when everything around her is telling her that she needs to be soft and feminine. Sweat is not pretty. Fortunately for me, Mike thinks it is beautiful.

Nancy, Shelby does not go out one on one either. It is a group thing. We laugh because she says she is "going out" with someone and we say "where are you going??" Not funny in her world. She is pretty good about keeping one boyfriend and he is the one who dumps her for "that" girl. She cries and I tell her that "that" boy is out there somewhere it just takes awhile to find him. You know the one that loves sweaty muscular girls who can hurt them if they wanted too...lol. Shelby and I also have an understanding that this is an 8th grade prom and I am not going full out on it. Last year's dress was on the clearance rack for $25, $5 shoes from TJ Maxx and the lady that took care of her when she was a baby is our hairdresser so she takes care of the hair/makeup and nails thing. Last year, when Marie was done with her, she looked like she should have been going to senior prom. Daddy cried....

Thank you, Lisa.

And I think the dance sounds wonderful! I love that your sports loving daughter plays dress up, too. That's awesome, so well rounded.

I was never an athlete, so I have no words of wisdom. But I think strong is wonderful - it will carry her through the rest of her life. I'd just pepper her with feminist magazines and books and stuff showing women being what they want, and not what they are told to be.

Please. I WISH I had moved my butt at some point in my life!

 

[3DisneyKids]

I don't think anyone gets through the teen years unscathed. Just recently I reconnected with an old friend. We were best friends in like 4th and 5th grades. Then came junior high and high school...she was in the popular crowd, I was in a couple of other crowds. And she told me how utterly miserable she was in high school. Hated it. Hated the other girls in her crowd, and hated herself. We all experience growing pains. For some it is easy to see their pain or the fact that they don't fit in. For others, it is more internal and it might look like they have it made when that is not the case. That age is just hard, period.

 

[DisneyWorld Delight]

That age is just hard, period.

Yes! Like now as an adult, (E) your athletic body is a beautiful thing. And if your girls didn't like that about themselves now, like Shelby, it would hurt you. Ah, what you don't know until you grow up.

Example you can tell Shelby, till you are blue in the face, the boys are probably staring cause they like what they see, but she absolutely won't believe it. Cause you are her mom and an idiot.

I was using multiple situations, did I confuse anyone?

 

[3DisneyKids]

No, I followed you.

 

[SeptemberGirl]

Made total sense to me!

But what's funny is that's an example of how you talk. It's very Lyz. Which is good. Good writers write in their voice.

I agree that is is equally traumatic all the way around. If you're like me and Kat, not a fit girl in HS, you don't know that all girls have troubles. I didn't care too much though, to be honest. I was pretty happy in high school. Unpopular, but I had friends and a sweet boyfriend and some boys who were geeks but liked me. I was cool among the uncool, and that was just fine with me.

 

[SeptemberGirl]

Kelly - I am super sorry you are sick. And I love your daily food post, BTW.

 

[goofyfan-12]

Liz – you are not being selfish. You are being a caring and compassionate woman by empowering those around you to lead long and healthy lives. Sure you get the added benefit of having them in your life longer, but shh… I won’t tell them that if you don’t. You are strong, you are a role model (peanut butter cups and all) and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Ugh… the plight of the teen age girl. How the heck did any of us make it out alive? Kids are cruel because they haven’t figured out who they are yet or how to accept others so they buy into the labels that society projects and categorize accordingly. It just plain sucks. If you find someone who was actually happy with their life in middle school and high school than in the words of Billy Joel (when talking about his song about Brenda and Jimmy from Scenes from an Italian Restaurant), they peaked too early and had no where else to go with their lives.

Lisa – tell your daughter to be happy with who she is. Support the choices she makes and the interests she develops. Encourage her to be the best person that she can be and to be understanding of other people’s differences be they appearance, interests, thoughts, etc. That is what is going to make her such a cool, confident and interesting adult. Girls can be anything they want to be these days, but only if we give them to the tools to succeed and that includes empowering them to feel that they have a right to succeed. Now I suspect you already do this, but keep it going.

Liz - I loved what you said about being cool amongst the uncool kids. I can totally relate to that. I had a hard time believing that the cool kids had their own issues to deal with because all I could see was how cool their lives were and how uncool mine was. Now that I think about it, my life was pretty cool because I was comfortable with my group. It wasn't until my jr. year when I somehow got voted onto the prom court that I began to question what was going on. Somehow, I got pushed into the cool kid's spot and I am still not sure if it was a big joke or if I was supposed to be there. Either way - I don't really care. It was fun and I got my first real tiara (and happy to say, not my last) and a place in the yearbook right?

Hope everyone's day is going well... I realy don't want to be at work today (can you tell)...
Paula

 

[HockeyKat]

I am still not a cool kid, but somewhere in my late teens/early 20s, I learned not to care as much about it, and do my own thing and be happy there. Do I still carry all that baggage? Sure. But, I have a good life, am successful, and am free to do/try what I want to do with no boundaries. Am I the world's biggest social butterfly? No. Do I have tons of friends? No. But I do have good friends, and that is all that matters.

I am with Paula, just encourage her. Be there for her. Make her feel that you approve, that you love her no matter what, and that people are fickle and can be mean but that if she has a good support system, they don't matter. That is something that I lacked, growing up... I still feel that I try to get my parents' approval and fail.

Okay, deep dump for today. Sorry!!

Kelly, sorry you are feeling poorly. Somehow I totally missed that post! I love your daily food log too, and am going to join you this week since I have gone back to low-cal.

 

[AKASnowWhite]

I thought I would share a link to an article I read about finding out what your ideal weight is. It was interesting to see what influences our thought processes about our weight. Here is the link if anyone is interested:

http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/heal...t-5-tips-for-finding-your-happy-weight-393032

Gonna go read it, take the quiz, find out if my plans are realistic! Awesome compliment from Jesse. It does feel good to be validated, doesn't it?

Good luck at JC tonight. Whatever it is, well, it just is. Movin' on!

9. You have a ton of talents, but music isn't one of them. Let it go.

Are you one of those people that isn't allowed to sing? Ever? Even in church?

Shelby has issues with the stereotypes of a female athlete. If you have any wise insights on this, I would really appreciate it. The non-athlete or athlete wannabe girls tell her she is built like a boy and plays sports like a boy, etcetera. It is painful for her, and me. She has so much talent inside her body but she is so afraid to let it out because of the perception from others. I try to reassure her that the true athletes do not stereotype, they appreciate you for what you are.

I was going to respond to this - but Kat, Lyz, Erika & Paula said it so perfectly.

http://www.komennorthjersey.org/site/TR/Race/General?px=1124401&pg=personal&fr_id=1040

I'll do it tonight.

But I was mortified. I never swam competitively again.

Wow. Add to list "words hurt. Choose them carefully"

Oh, do you know what tomorrow is?

Ummm....Tuesday?

I don't know about being a good role model - it's selfish. I want the women in my life to have a better chance. I want them to be educated and know their options and live lifestyles that are active and might help prevent breast cancer. I want this for me, because they are so important to me.

I wouldn't call that selfish. I'd call that being pretty wonderful.

That age is just hard, period.

A-men!

I was using multiple situations, did I confuse anyone?

I got it.


Wow. That took me a while. Now I've forgotten what I started to post in the first place

 

[RodK1975]

I won't go to the trouble of quoting and all that. But, I did want to say a few things.

First off!

<-- Ostracized fat band geek. Need I say more?

And on a very serious note:

Liz, I just wanted to say that your post really moved me. I'm so sorry for the crap your mom and you are having to deal with. I can identify with what you're dealing with. Not from the exact same perspective, but a similar one. It's a long drawn out sad story and that's for another time. I know it doesn't fix things, but I want you to know you and your mother are in my thoughts and prayers. Keep taking care of yourself so you can keep taking care of your mom!

 

[AKASnowWhite]

<-- Ostracized fat band geek. Need I say more?

What instrument did you play?

 

[RodK1975]

What instrument did you play?

HAHA! No. The Trumpet. When I first started band the teacher tried to get me to play the trombone. The only worse suggestion she could've made was asking me to play the tuba. If I had played either the tuba or trombone I could have been the "Ostracized stereotypical <insert tuba or trombone playing> fat band geek"

That gets 3 scary faces.