In a divorce what is best advice for a man

[aahmom1]

Realistically, an affair alone won't ensure he gets the kids. He would have to prove that she is unfit. She may be an unfit wife, but that doesn't mean she's an unfit Mother.

 

[aahmom1]

Ok, I just read your other post, if she has been a bad Mother all this time he should have left sooner, not waited until she had an affair.

 

[tedsmom]

The first thing he needs to do is protect his children. If she is being neglectful, then it is his responsibilty to ensure that his children are properly cared for.

The family law attorney is probably the best advice. Find out exactly what isproof is necessary for one parent to obtain custody and another parent to lose it. If he is not interested in contniuing his marriage (and quite frankly, I wouldn't blame him if he wasn't) then he needs to begin to make preparations now for that time, he needs to have proof of how he would care for his children should he obtain custody etc. It's hard for him right now, because of all the emotions involved...now is the time for him to do his homework and get his ducks in a row.

 

[Antonia]

Thanks for alll your replies. We are a close family with us and grandparents living within 2 miles of each other. In fact, we live on the same street. This is why I am extra heartbroken to think my nieces may not be so close. Send some pixie dust our way.

 

[MerryPoppins]

I have no personal experience to draw from, in this case. But, I would say that even if he goes the counseling route, he should start documenting the things that happen. Sounds like the relationship is pretty rocky to me and he wouldn't necessarily ever have to use the notebook. It would just be there if the time came that he would need it.

I'll keep your family in my thoughts and prayers.