I'm so proud of my Aspie son-and so sad for him, too

[missypie]

DS16, with Asperger's Syndrome, just complete 6 performances in his high school musical. They started rehearsing back in October. He has a strong singing voice and was in the chorus...didn't want any lines. He did a great job.

But Friday night he said, "Dad said that I'd make a lot of new friends if I was in the musical, and I really haven't." Poor thing....that's going to be the story of his life. I don't think the cast disliked him, but no one is going to be calling him to hang out with them on Friday nights either.

 

[famofsix]

I'm sorry he feels that way. Hopefully some of the students will appreciate his talent. Maybe he could invite some of the cast over for a movie night or something . Focus on how proud you are of him for performing. It hurts when we see our kid's talents and uniqueness and the peer group doesn't see it.

 

[OKWMom]

That breaks my heart. My daughter is non-verbal and is much lower functioning than your son, but I watch her watching the other children, wanting to join in, and it just kills me. I'm sorry this didn't work out the way he expected.

 

[missypie]

That breaks my heart. My daughter is non-verbal and is much lower functioning than your son, but I watch her watching the other children, wanting to join in, and it just kills me. I'm sorry this didn't work out the way he expected.

Don't get me wrong...he had a terrific time while he was doing it. He has more friends than lots of Aspies...a couple from Scouts; a couple from choir. But he's high functioning enough to know that other people have more friends, get asked to do things over the weekend, etc. Being in something as all comsuming as a school musical gives you sort of a pre-made social group for as long as it lasts. He would never be invited to parties at those kids' houses, but for the show. The cast was great to him, but he's not the kind of kid that folks instantly warm to.

 

[Luv Bunnies]

Maybe it would be fun to host a party at your house for the cast of the play? Some of the other kids might not think your son is interested in going to parties or going out on weekends (or maybe it just never crossed their minds - you know how teenagers are!). Since he's just met a new group of potential friends, it might be time for him to take the initiative and invite them over. Maybe if he initiates a social situation first, others will see that he's a really nice guy and reciprocate in the future. Of course, you would be there from the invitations through the party to support him and help facilitate the whole thing! Could be a step toward some new friendships for him!