RE talking with the chef--
our experience this past month was patchy. It was more crowded than I've seen WDW in quite a while, and this most definitely affected service quality in the restaurants.
Our situation is that our son is now 15 and my deepest fear at times is that he might literally rather die than call attention to himself and have the entire restaurant come to a standstill staring at him while a chef very loudly makes it clear he's different. I've always dealt extentensively with the chefs but this trip he threatened to walk out if I made a deal of it. But at buffets there was no choice.
Up until he was 13 any trace of any milk product--whey, sodium caseinate -- any trace was enough to induce anaphylaxis. The same with eggs. He now can tolerate small amounts of butter and even occasionally whey when baked into a product. Small amounts of baked egg are okay. If he takes a bite of something with a small amount of hidden milk he knows immediately by the burning in his mouth, but we aren't plunging the epi-pen in and dialing 911.
This makes the situation more difficult as it no longer is absolute avoidance, but it matters if it is butter or milk-based, and how much. Butter is okay. Cheese is not.
The tree nut allergy is very virulent--a particle of pecan is enough to kill him, but nuts are much easier to avoid. After a very close call in reacting to one chip cooked in peanut oil at age 4 we've never tried any peanut product again (and successfully avoided exposure for 11 years.)
So with our cook skateboarding allergic kid this is how we handled it this time.
As always, when making PS's I had the allergies noted on our PS. When we checked in I noticed that at least half the time it was entered erroneously--as lactose intolerant, say, when we are talking a fullblown milk allergy.
When we ordered, if the food was complex or buffet, we got the chef. At Boma and Cinderalla's 1900 Park Fare the chef was outstanding and walked him through the line. At Cyrstal Palace the chef was very hurried and took longer to show up than the characters.
We were most disappointed on this trip that there were no offers to prepare an alternate dessert--2 years ago at Boma the chef made him sorbet and fried papaya--and this time produced Rice Dream, a vile substance that no 15 yo is going to think a good substitute for how the zebra domes look like they might taste.
In table service restaurants he himself orders and specifies dairy free. (Since he's still in the meat and fries stage of his life this isn't too difficult.) I am dancing the dance of realizing that college is staring at me in 3 more years and he has got to deal with this in a way which is direct but doesn't mortally embarrass him.
at Mama Melrose's they were fantastic. I highly recommend this restuarant to anyone dealing with food allergies. They made him alternate salad and flatbread without a big deal. At King Stefan's (lunch) we asked if the garnish for the pot roast pot pie had cheese in it (it turned out to be mayo) and before the words came out they had whisked the plate away, the chef was out the door and a new plate was in front of him. Our 1950's Primetime server "got" the situation and handled it without drawing attention to him.
In Japan they have kaki-gori--snow cones--which are wonderful and nutfree.
At the Brown Derby, I am sad to say, they accomodated his request for fries instead of mashed, but were indifferent and made him feel he was imposing. But they did prepare a wonderful fruit plate as a dessert. If you are taking a child with allergies to the Coral Reef, I WOULD demand to see the chef, as our server barely spoke english and definitely made dealing with it discreetly difficult.
I was most concerned about our meal at Marrakesh (sp) in Morocco at Epcot. I phoned ahead, spoke to the restaurant directly, and we talked at the door. What I got was a chef who turned up to drop off a list of "dairy, nut and gluten free" foods--about 4 of them. Since we don't need gluten free this was more limiting than we needed, but my impression was they really couldn't have cared less in terms of helping us identify everything he COULD eat. We were in their last seating, and the service was very rushed. It was our worst meal of the trip, allergy wise and dining wise.
Please forgive this lengthy epistle. LaughinPlace199-- my message to you is that it is possible to dine around the World and find many alternates even while toting that epipen every place.
Dealing with it will give your child skills and maturity which will turn her into a leader and teach her compassion. When my boy was in grade school he was allergic to the food vapors in the cafeteria and had to eat with the nurse every day. When another child was hurt or terrified, they called in Graham to come be the "buddy".
He has been close to death 9 times with asthma and food related episodes. 3 of those were hidden nuts. We were very close to owning Universal. Should you be in a situation where she needs the epi, do not be afraid to give it. Get the trainer and practice with it. If you're not a member, I highly recommend the Food Allergy Network for support and information. The very best news is the FDA is currently in the final stages of approving a new anti-IGE drug which seems very promising--in particular for peanut allergy. The studies indicate that it doesn't make you able to eat a PBJ sandwich, but that you could eat 4 or 5 nuts without reacting--all the difference in a hidden nut situation.
Feel free to email me for any more info.
No peanuts! 
