I worry my breakup has ruined Disney World for me

AlyPaly97

Earning My Ears
Joined
Jan 21, 2020
I've know my ex since I was 13 and we were together for most of the past 9 years, but we broke up a couple of months ago. Last May him and I went to Disney World together for the first time - I'd been before with my family but it was his first trip and it was so much fun. When we got back we booked another trip and it was pretty much understood that he would propose on it, but we broke up before the trip and I ended up cancelling it because I couldn't afford to pay for the whole thing myself. I've always loved Disney and the parks, but now every time I consider booking a trip for myself I find it really upsetting, but I don't want to lose something I enjoy over someone who doesn't care about me and I don't know what to do about it.
 

MamaBelle4

DIS Veteran
Joined
Feb 29, 2016
I've know my ex since I was 13 and we were together for most of the past 9 years, but we broke up a couple of months ago. Last May him and I went to Disney World together for the first time - I'd been before with my family but it was his first trip and it was so much fun. When we got back we booked another trip and it was pretty much understood that he would propose on it, but we broke up before the trip and I ended up cancelling it because I couldn't afford to pay for the whole thing myself. I've always loved Disney and the parks, but now every time I consider booking a trip for myself I find it really upsetting, but I don't want to lose something I enjoy over someone who doesn't care about me and I don't know what to do about it.
Time heals all wounds, truly it does. I am sorry for your heartbreak, though.

Have you considered going with a close friend?
 


AlyPaly97

Earning My Ears
Joined
Jan 21, 2020
Time heals all wounds, truly it does. I am sorry for your heartbreak, though.

Have you considered going with a close friend?
I've thought about it, but it's not something my friends can really afford. I'm the only one who has graduated (my friends are all amazingly clever people who are all doing masters or studying things like medicine), so it would also be limited to more expensive times of year. And I really do like travelling alone, so I think if I can do it then I'll be able to move past it and be able to enjoy it alone, but right now it feels like I'll never feel ready to do that
 
  • AlyPaly97

    Earning My Ears
    Joined
    Jan 21, 2020
    I'm sorry. I do think it will get better. Have you considered Disneyland in the mean time to get a Disney theme park, but maybe a little distance from the memories?
    That's definitely worth considering. Honestly I've kind of just been dwelling a bit on the fact that this is something I want to do that I feel like I can't right now, but that might be a nice middle ground for me .
     

    Buttcracker

    Applesauce
    Joined
    May 16, 2019
    I did my first solo trip last June-talk about a different perspective of WDW. It allowed me to get lost in my own thoughts, refocus and reset on what really matters. Book the solo trip....
     

    5kidsmommy

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Aug 16, 2013
    So sorry you are going through this. Breakups are tough especially when you've been together so long. My mom advice to heal your broken heart is to do a trip, whether it's to WDW or Disneyland. Make new memories that you can focus on. Moving forward is hard but in the end you'll be stronger for it. Plan some fun stuff. Heck maybe you can do one of the tours. I wish you luck going forward. You've already lost a lot but don't lose Disney if it means so much to you. ❤
     
  • mommasita

    DIS VETERAN
    Moderator
    Joined
    Aug 3, 2004
    I’m sorry for What you are going through.
    I really agree, I would go through with the trip, make some memories. Show yourself that you can do it, you may just surprise yourself with the end result!
     
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    AlyPaly97

    Earning My Ears
    Joined
    Jan 21, 2020
    Thank you all so much for the perspective - I think I'll definitely start looking into planning a solo trip, probably as part of a bigger trip I want to take later this year. Hopefully by then I'll have some distance from how I'm feeling right now and feel able to make some new memories for myself
     

    PamNC

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Aug 19, 1999
    I can relate and I can tell you - it won't ruin it forever. I actually learned ON OUR DISNEY VACATION that my husband had cheated. I knew we had some issues but he decided to just point blank tell me while we were at Disney. I will never forget it - we were staying at the Dolphin. It was 2008 - early June. We went to Disney on our honeymoon in 1994 and it was his first time - I was a veteran because I went with my family as a youngster and teenager. He LOVED it - we went every single year at least once - usually twice and somethings even a third shorter trip. So, it was OUR place. We were Disney nuts. I remember when he told me - I was so devastated and I remember walking around Crescent Lake crying and in a panic. We tried to stay because it was only 2 days into our 7 day vacation but we couldn't. I changed my plane ticket back and came home and he did too - but I told him to pay for it himself and figure it out. Of course, we divorced because that's a deal breaker for me. he didn't want to divorce at first - but I firmly believe it all happened for the best. We really should have never gotten married. I felt the same way you did - like it would ruin Disney for me. I didn't go back for 2 years. But, when I did - I didn't think about his dumb BUTT once. My Disney love was still there. Time heals all wounds. Disney will always be there, but boyfriends, girlfriends and spouses - not necessarily !! Take back Disney for yourself.
     

    AlyPaly97

    Earning My Ears
    Joined
    Jan 21, 2020
    I've been able to book a trip for myself to Disneyland for a few days on my way to New Zealand in July. I still don't feel ready to go to Disney World because the memories there with him feel quite raw, but I feel like it's not completely ruined for me forever anymore which is really encouraging for me.
     
  • mommasita

    DIS VETERAN
    Moderator
    Joined
    Aug 3, 2004
    glad to hear, hey it’s Disney!

    You are sounding like you are healing one day at a time. Gentle hugs to you 😍
     

    theluckyrabbit

    Moderator
    Moderator
    Joined
    Jul 23, 2012
    I've been able to book a trip for myself to Disneyland for a few days on my way to New Zealand in July. I still don't feel ready to go to Disney World because the memories there with him feel quite raw, but I feel like it's not completely ruined for me forever anymore which is really encouraging for me.
    Glad to hear that you have a DLR trip in the works! That is something fun to look forward to! Come on over to the Disneyland (California) board -- we can help plan something special just for you!
     

    AlyPaly97

    Earning My Ears
    Joined
    Jan 21, 2020
    I'm so grateful to you all for encouraging me to book a trip - the planning is giving me something to look forward to and I've been feeling a lot more like myself again. I'd kind of felt like I'd lost my identity a little bit, having had someone be such a huge part of my life for so much of it, that I didn't entirely know who I was on my own any more. I'm still working on it, and I know it will take some time, but it feels like taking back something I associated with the relationship so much has helped, and reminded me that I'm able to enjoy things just for myself
     

    theluckyrabbit

    Moderator
    Moderator
    Joined
    Jul 23, 2012
    I'm so grateful to you all for encouraging me to book a trip - the planning is giving me something to look forward to and I've been feeling a lot more like myself again. I'd kind of felt like I'd lost my identity a little bit, having had someone be such a huge part of my life for so much of it, that I didn't entirely know who I was on my own any more. I'm still working on it, and I know it will take some time, but it feels like taking back something I associated with the relationship so much has helped, and reminded me that I'm able to enjoy things just for myself
    Glad to hear this. You're right -- going through something like this is hard and takes time. But planning this DLR trip will be a very good thing (and fun!). It was encouraging to see your thread on the DLR board -- enjoy your planning! This can be such a magical experience for you! :)
     



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