I am sick of my house....

[ez]

You know, its funny, we actually live in what many people would consider a great house. Heck, I'll even admit it, but it is just too much to take care of. I want things to look nice, but there is no keeping up with everything while we are working full time. We live in a wood house on a huge lot with a pool and lots of decking, and sometimes I just dream of a house with no pool and a small yard, something we can take care of. Our neighbors and neighborhood is so great that it is really hard to consider moving, the schools, the locations are ideal. We have a cleaning lady come in a couple times a month , but we can't hire too much of the work out, its so damn expensive. We would make a tidy profit on our house if we sold, but then we'd be paying a fortune to buy. MY dd adamently doesn't want to move.
How can I fall in love with my house again. I feel like I have no ambition, and no vision. I am just tired of looking at all the work that needs to be done, with no energy to do anything about it, especially now that I am pg....as though I wasn't tired before! Any suggestions?

 

[barbeml]

All I can tell you is that it is tough keeping up with a house of any size!

My townhome is only 1500 square feet, and all the landscaping and outside maintenance is done by the condo association. However, I still have three bedrooms and three bathrooms and I swear the place is never clean. It is not a question of dirty but cluttered! And we don't even have kids.

I try to focus on keeping the downstairs presentable so that we can have company on short notice, but the upstairs is a disaster. We both work full time and my DH does his share, but the only person I know with a spotless house is my DH's Mom--and she is home cleaning all day every day!

I find it helps to make a wish list of what I want done (right now that includes a new kitchen floor, new bedroom furniture, painting main bath, new computer desk, and redoing the laundry room with stackables so that I have room for a freezer), and tackle one room at a time. Writing it down really helps me focus.

Good luck!

Barbe

 

[ahutton]

I have been there, and sometimes still find myself there. Right now the housing market in our area is still down, so selling would be a long and painful process, and I wouldn't be sure it was really the right thing to do. So this year I've tried to do little things (now that DH is working again - he was laid off in the spring) that help make the house feel more like home and make it possible to keep up with working full time (and then some) jobs and our DDs who are 4 & 2.

We did hire (thanks to Mom and Dad) a cleaning team on an hourly basis to go through the house and do a big cleaning. I had them clean light fixtures, bathrooms, windows, the stuff that is time consuming and hard to do with the kids around and that I hate doing, and had them do the rooms that we are in most often first. My bathrooms sparkled for a long time after their visit, and the light fixtures do too. It was nice to get to a "higher level" of clean than I can normally accomplish, and it was easier to keep there too. We also paid to have our carpets cleaned, which was really nice.

We have wanted to paint a couple rooms for a long time, but haven't gotten around to it because doing a whole rooms seems so time consuming and hard to get insprired on. I have been able to do some new art on the walls, and that has helped. If you have a Cost Plus/World Market store in your area they have nice looking frames for larger posters, and a great selection of posters to go in those frames.

Since you are pg you may not want to do this yourself, but what about moving furniture around to a new arrangement?

My biggest thing was to pick things to do in areas we are always in, so they seemed fresher. Even if it is little stuff like what is on the mantle in your family room, and what pictures are on the walls. Maybe add a new color in a throw/blanket on the couch with some new art?

Sorry so long, but last, remember that nesting will kick in and you'll get a bunch of stuff done at the last minute!

 

[ez]

you made me feel better, I guess I'm not the only one. That is good that you have a 2 story house and can keep downstairs presentable. That is one of the complains I have about my house, it has an extremely open floor plan, so if there is a messy area, even out to the pool, it is visible when you first walk in. Its like, the very thing that is striking about my house, the thing I fell in love with it for, is the thing I've grown to hate about it.
One idea I've had is, my son has moved out and I was thinking of giving him my light washed oak dining table and getting a beautiful new dark wood table with 6 side chairs and lighted china. That would be a very dramatic change from what I have now, but maybe thats what I need! I saw a beautiful set reasonably priced in the furniture store today, I am really thinking about it!

 

[luv2nascar]

We got rid of the big monster old stone home that constantly needed fixing & repairing 1 1/2 yrs ago
That yard alone took 3 - 3 1/2 hrs to mow & trim
It was always a mess and had broken things
We moved into a townhouse August 2002 & love it
Not much outside work - they do the mowing, mulching, shrubs, and snow removal
Smaller home and everythings new so not much in repairs
and we are still cluttered - I thought it would be spotless and it's not. Now granted we added another child from 1 to 2 children but really were does all the dust and clutter come from.
I'm not sorry we moved just wish it was even easier than it is.

 

[ez]

its good to know I'm not the only one who gets this way. A townhouse sounds like a dream about now!

 

[JESW]

I hear ya! When we had this house built back in '97 we neglected to ask for the self-cleaning model!

The kids are only 4 & 9 and it seems that there are messes EVERYWHERE! I am a sahm and I feel like all I do is pick up. I get very discouraged too, expecially when I go into people's houses that are clean, organized and un-cluttered. I have been in MAJOR cleaning mode lately so maybe I can get rid of a lot of stuff.

Jill

 

[FreshTressa]

Originally posted by ez
you made me feel better, I guess I'm not the only one. That is good that you have a 2 story house and can keep downstairs presentable. That is one of the complains I have about my house, it has an extremely open floor plan, so if there is a messy area, even out to the pool, it is visible when you first walk in. Its like, the very thing that is striking about my house, the thing I fell in love with it for, is the thing I've grown to hate about it.
One idea I've had is, my son has moved out and I was thinking of giving him my light washed oak dining table and getting a beautiful new dark wood table with 6 side chairs and lighted china. That would be a very dramatic change from what I have now, but maybe thats what I need! I saw a beautiful set reasonably priced in the furniture store today, I am really thinking about it!

Think about how much help you could hire for the price of that table.

 

[Pin Wizard]

I'm the clutter queen here myself. LOL! Just can't seem to get rid of it or put it some place out of sight. I keep going through it and moving it...that's it! I love my house!! And I've had it 7.5 years now! I'm considering a move to VA, but I want to take my house with me!!

 

[SeaSpray]

We loved this house when we bought it 5 years ago....and then until this past fall I was really beginning to get sick of it. We need to paint, needed a new bathroom floor, etc, but we had no motivation to get started on these projects. Then in September, in the middle of a lot of family problems (my mother died, brother had heart problems, sister with brain tumor and other health problems) our hot water heater burst in the middle of the night and flooded our almost-completed remodeled familyroom, in the basement. What a mess!! Little did I know then that it would turn out to be a blessing in disguise. Our insurance company covered all the damage and reimbursed us for our losses. Now, 2 1/2 months later, we have a beautiful newly painted and carpeted family room, separate laundry room, separate work shop, and DH's office, and had enough paint left that we painted the livingroom, too. We moved our old livingroom furniture down to the family room and bought new, beautiful furniture for the livingroom. New drapes, accessories, etc. Then while we were on a remodeling mode, we put down a new bathroom floor and toiler. What a huge difference, I now LOVE my house again!

Anyway....How about repainting one of the rooms? Since you're pregnant, how about picking out colors and things for the new baby's room? Would those kinds of things help you at all? Or is it the structure of the house itself that you're sick of?? It sounds like you really need a reason to fall in love with your house again.

 

[ear_poppin]

I do know how you feel. I have a massive house by British standards....we have just had a party for my Dad...suprise 70th...I took a week off work and cleaned and decluttered the whole house.

We also decorated the hall. Its amazing how a fresh link of paint and clean and clutter free keeps it tidier for longer and makes you feel good. Just taking the Christmas tree down has made it seem big and spacious again as well.

When you are pregnant it all seems too much. You will feel better once the baby is born.

De Clutter that is the key.

 

[ez]

but I am beyond sick of the clutter. We actually bought our house from someone who would now be considered a celebrity in the sporting world (not an athlete, on the business end of things) When I first walked in, I was blown away. Of course it was immaculate and professionally decorated, The house is built on a hill and each room opens into each other, and goes down steps to match the hill, the top floor the kitchen with a railing decending into the greatroom with hugestackable doors that go onto a porch pool area and yard, so as soon as you walk in you are getting a panoramic view of it all. So if the kitchen is a mess or my husband has neglected the pool and its turned green, or if theres crap in the living room or on the porch..it is all there to see when you walk in.
My old house was very dark, so to compansate I always had light furniture. But my light furmiture seems to disappear in this house, because there is so much natural light. I have always had a very hard time decorating this house with its open floor plan. I do much better with individual specific rooms. That is why I'm thinking the dark dining room set might give things a boost. One side of my greatroom is the dining area.
I can't see us moving right now, so I really need to try to feel better. I took the dogs out in the backyard today, cause they were spraying out front, and it depressed me. The lawn is out of control, pool is a mess, decks need sanding and painting. Unfortunately, dh is into riding his motorcycle and playing in his band and this stuff is last on the list. So both inside and out are making me crazy. Especially when I think of what a showplace it was when we bought it. Thanks for the vent!

 

[Princess Michelle]

When you get sick of your house you could always think about all the people out there who don't have one. I'm sure you would feel much better about it then.

 

[ez]

about that today. I'm sure there would be many people who would be thrilled to have our house, and you have to appreciate what you have. Believe me, my husband and I have worked nonstop, with lots of overtime, for many years to get where we are, when we first got together, we were as poor as poor can be. Somehow, its the human condition, and we can't help but react to our own situation, in spite of the big picture. I struggle with that. I can't help but feel physically and emotionally overwhelmed when I come home exhausted from work to my disorganized house. Even though I am grateful to have a roof over my head, its still hard to not be upset an overwhelmed to know that no matter how hard I work, for how many years, it always seems to be 1 step foward, 2 steps back. But thanks for the reminder!

 

[darlene9947]

Lord, I've been married 32 years and still have not mastered the art of keeping house! But I am learning. Ya'll have to go to www.flylady.net. She tells you to set a timer for 15 minutes and do something: toss clutter, dust, sweep, etc. When the timer buzzes, you stop. Her theory is, you can do anything, 15 minutes at a time. Give it a try!

 

[Christine]

Gosh, do I know how you feel. I've been saying this for years. We live in a 2400 sq foot house which is "average" by today's standards. It is an open floor plan and the living room has cathedral/vaulted ceilings up to the second floor. It takes me at least a whole weekend to clean the house from top to bottom and even then, it isn't all clean. And to even think about doing a decorating project? Forget it....every painting project now takes at least 3 weeks to complete. It is so overwhelming that I get depressed over it. I keep thinking of selling my house and moving to one of those yucky looking ramblers in the next county up (which is the same price as my house). Getting about 1,000 square feet. I could decorate a rooom in a weekend.

Before we moved into this house, we had a townhouse. I could scrub that thing from top to bottom in 3 hours!. I remember painting the bedroom before my daughter was born. It took me one weekend and I did it all by myself. Now, I would never want to go back to townhouse life; however, the thoughts of a smaller house sound VERY appealing. If they weren't in such bad shape....

 

[KarenB]

The solution is to trade houses with us!!! Just kidding!


We have a three bedroom ranch with a finished basement. I have it down now that I can clean it pretty well in two hours. BUT.....what allows me to do that is I have been doing away with the clutter and not saving anything I don't use. Our attic is practically empty and we have lived here for 8 years. Yes, there has been times that I would think "How I wish I had that one purple vase" or "I wonder if that black dress would have fit me again" but the thought goes away fast.


Our kids are 14 and 15 and I think the decluttering bug hit me when they were about 10 and 11.....Just TOO MUCH STUFF!!!!

I know it is very hard when working full time. I returned back to school, graduated in MAy, and started full time in August and what a difference it makes to try to get things accomplished.

What would happed if you and DH attacked the clutter in one room a weekend???? Have a huge garage sale or give the stuff away, then open the windows and get some fresh paint!!

Hope this helps a little!
Karen

 

[believe]

If you don't want to be dusting more often I would rethink dark furniture....it shows dust way faster than light furniture. I only have dark furniture in my bedroom and hope to replace that in the next couple years because it bothers me to see the dust.

 

[SandraM]

I have a clutter mad family and I've recognised that I've lost the battle against their clutter. The only thing I could do was claim an area for myself that I could keep clutter free. Would you be able to do that? Maybe you could screen off an area with bead curtains or simply sit in a chair with your back to the clutter and a nice clean and tidy area in front of you? If you can give yourself a specific time every day to either relax or do something sitting down in this area it may help you to feel a bit less stressed. Lighting a lavender candle would be nice too!
I did a course last year which taught me that if you're having the same problem, and dealing with it the same way isn't solving it, then you need to have a long look at the problem and find an alternative way of dealing with it. Sounds obvious, but when you're very close to a situation sometimes you can forget that there may be another way of dealing with it!
Good luck.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Originally posted by JESW
I hear ya! When we had this house built back in '97 we neglected to ask for the self-cleaning model!

The kids are only 4 & 9 and it seems that there are messes EVERYWHERE! I am a sahm and I feel like all I do is pick up. I get very discouraged too, expecially when I go into people's houses that are clean, organized and un-cluttered. I have been in MAJOR cleaning mode lately so maybe I can get rid of a lot of stuff.

Jill

Hey EZ, I am doing what JESW is doing! We built a monster house in 2000 & I am regretting it too!

My kids are 7 & 12 and I was able to convince them to get rid of 70% of their toys.
We are getting rid of clutter and painting.

Its so overwhelming as we have so much stuff to get rid of. I just think of Dory..."just keep swimming". My goal is to be completely declutter before Feb. 27 2005 (when I turn 40).

Good Luck!