How do you handle $ for kids souvenirs?

[gryfoxmama]

That sounds like a lot of work.....I'd lose track and DS14 would argue until he was blue in the face about how i didnt explain the rules clearly and how was he supposed to know that saying his sister was *acting* like an idiot really means the same as actually saying she really *was* an idiot?, not to mention that my kids would probably give up once I took enough points away and decide it is just more fun to put their feet in each others faces and torture each other instead.

This reminds me of the time I spent hours creating a cute soccer field chore chart with velcro soccer balls with chores written on them for DS to move toward the "goal". It was all fun and games till he decided it was going to be impossible to get all the balls to the goal fast enough and said he was fine without getting a prize.

Or the time I made a sign about the "putting their games and phones and toys they left laying around in the box till they did a chore to earn them back" thing that was floating around pinterest a while ago...my kids thanked me for keeping their junk in a safe place and were not con erned at all about getting their belongings back since I was taking such good care of their stuff.

I've found that the best thing that works for my kids is good old fashioned expectations and logical rules. The cutesy creative discipline tactics just dont work in my house!!

Good tip though, for anyone who might want to try it!

I have four grown kids, three adopted (two who are bi-polar & ADHD) and 8 grandkids. We travel in large groups. I figure we can either spend time/energy in trying to manage behaviors/ problems or avoiding them.
- With my four grown kids the "good old fashioned expectations and logical rules" worked.
- Not all kids can think long term with consequences or rewards. One of mine (12) can't think out of 15 mins and my ticket system with the short term acknowledgment of good behavior REALLY works.
- The first time I used the ticket system- my adult daughter, me, and 6 kids 3-15 were in the car for 18 hrs. The first hour was rough until they figured out we meant business. I was especially proud of my 15 yr old who was going through some major emotional issues (hospitalized when we got home from vacation)....she had a ROUGH first two hours and than pretty much hibernated because she wanted to stay out of trouble and earn a DS game.
Our car ride / ticket system was so successful when did it through the whole 8 day trip. Lot of work to keep track of tickets but it WORKED!!
- I refuse to let the special needs of my children keep me home.

 

[pigletto]

We've done it a few ways. Our dd 17 usually has babysitting money that she asks me to exchange before we go, plus we give them a set amount (it really depends.. maybe $50). Ds10 will have anything he's managed to set aside from birthdays or whatever, plus the money we give him.
We've done gift cards and cash. Cash works better for dd because she will buy things for friends and come home with money. Giftcard works better for ds because he makes sure to spend every penny.

I watch the episode of "The Middle" where they go to Disney World last night. I laughed and laughed watching their youngest son make them miss hours and hours of park time while he tried to decide what mouse ears to buy. That's ds10.. only it's in the Lego Store. He will save every penny and maybe have $100 and he wants to spend every cent in the Lego store. We typically go one evening and can easily be there for well over an hour, and then take a break to eat or whatever while he thinks it over, and go back for a half hour or more while he decides. They need to build a lounge into that place so I can be comfortable during this whole process.

 

[StephMK]

That's funny!

We learned our lesson the first trip - we told the kids (11, 7, and 6 at the time) that they each had $25 to spend however they wanted and that was it - no "rules". I held the cash. It got to be such a pain keeping track of who spent what, and what was bought as part of the $25 vs what DH and I would normally buy for the kids. DS14 (11 at the time) is such a debater that we would have 20-minute conversations - and by conversations I mean me ultimately losing it and grounding him for life LOL - over whether the $9.00 gigantic lollipop was part of the $25 because he thought that since it was food, we would pay for it, and if he *knew* that it counted against his $25 he never would have bought it with his OWN money, and it's not fair because the only thing he wants is legos or a new video game so why can't I just give him the money so he can save it for when he gets home, etc, etc, etc....ugh. NEVER again.

That's basically where the gift card and rules came from. $50 to spend IN WDW any way they wish, we buy the food and drinks, they buy whatever else they want. It worked.

That's funny! I have one of those - has to negotiate what is covered or not all the time. And one who spends any money she gets, then wonders why she doesn't have any saved up for her bigger wants.

Sometimes I will test them by saying they have to pay for it, just to see if they *really* want something. If they are willing to spend their own money for it, I know it's a good buy. It's amazing the things they want Mom to buy, yet aren't willing to spend their own cash to purchase.

When DD#1 was younger, if there was something she wanted, usually clothes, that I didn't think she'd wear later, I'd make her a deal. She could buy it and once she wore it X times, I'd pay her back for it.

For our non-Disney trip this summer, we are giving them a set amount and they can use that plus anything they have saved up. We will buy some snacks but they can buy anything else, extra snacks, souvenirs, or whatever.