Help! I need advice re MIL tagging along

[babiesX2]

CONGRATULATIONS!


Your dh did the right thing, and you can have fun!
​

 

[lissawynn]

I think the answer is that unless you MIL is paying for this vacation, which she's not, you don't have to include her.
I would never vacation with my MIL. DH has mentioned it a few times, and I've politely told him that one of us (me or his mom)wouldn't be making the trip back home.
I work too hard to save for vacations to include someone who would ruin my trip.
I hope things work out in your favor.

 

[Mindemarco]

She sounds just like a SPOILED BRAT! This sounds terrible!! What a downer to planning a wonderful trip.
Ideally you would be able to leave her at home but if you can't....my suggestion would be that you lay down the rules before you go. You might begin by telling her that the trip is for and all about the kids and that she is along for the ride. That said, you give her a schedule of events that you guys plan to follow and tell her that if she wants to participate then she can, otherwise, they disney shuttle is available to take her back and forth as her needs arise. You may also tell her that you have preplanned roughly where and when you are going to eat and that she is welcome to join you or she may make her own arrangements. It may sound harsh but it sounds like she is used to everyone bending to her bad behavior (I call it positive reimforcement for bad behavior...gettting what you want anyway). It sounds like your husband is supportive and doesn't deny that she acts bad so if you 2 can present a unified front then she will have no choice but to play by your rules on YOUR vacation!
GOOD LUCK!!!!

 

[crisi]

Sounds like my grandmother. My mother took far too long to learn what you just did, say no, let my father talk to his mother. Glad its working out for you and it sounds like your husband has learned exactly how to handle his mother.

You may just not want to give her openings. Let the kids know that Grandma doesn't need to know every detail of planning or the trip itself. Encourage them to talk about something else around her. Learn to change the subject when the kids do bring it up. Its hard for Disney fans not to babble endlessly about their trip, but it does create openings for this sort of rudeness.

 

[Del]

I'm so glad your dh stepped up to the plate for you. Have a great time!

 

[momofdbsdc]

Yeah!!!! Have a magical trip!!!

 

[Jen D]

I am so happy for you this worked out! I had a bad feeling in my stomach for you when I read your situation... I also have a MIL situation with some of the same problems-- narcissist, control freak, although the situation isn't as bad as yours. The conflicts I have with her give me horrible nervous stomach, so I really feel for you! Have a great great time in WDW and I'm so happy for you that your dh stepped up!

 

[Cynt]

Good thing your husband handled it. I couldn't wait to get to the bottom of this thread so I could add my two cents.

It's simple one word - NO. N--O, which part of this do you not understand. No explanations needed. You and your husband are grown and do not owe her an explanation nor excuse nor a maybe next time. Just simply NO you can not go.

I know it sounds mean and rude but this will make the picture perfectly clear.