Has anyone read 'A Child Called It' or the other Dave Pelzer books?

[poohandwendy]

Yes, I can imagine some of the details would be mixed up. BUT, I haven't heard anyone say he wasn't horribly abused by his mother. Ihave 4 siblings and we all recall things slightly differently, so I can see his brother picking apart his book. But did he say that Dave is flat-out lying or fabricated most of it? Or did he say that he doesn't have all of his facts straight? Because there is a big difference between the two.

 

[niks81]

Ihave 4 siblings and we all recall things slightly differently, so I can see his brother picking apart his book.

This is SO true! Me and my 3 brothers recall everything completely differently!!! It's kind of funny actually....so I suppose it could be a difference of opinion.

Although I guess I could honestly say I could see how he might have gotten mixed up with details from ages and dates since he was so terribly abused....I would think that would mess your head up a little.

 

[phamton]

I agree he was abused. His brother said that most of it never happened. I'm not sure about that. I think it is basically true. It is a horrific story but it has been labelled as the worst in California history, then later the 2nd worst, and now the third worst. Who determines that rating?

 

[niks81]

Who determines that rating?

Not sure....I'm guessing the degree of injury and stuff like that.

His brother said it never happened? WOW....considering the abuse was noticed by the teachers and they put their jobs on the line to remove him from the home, I think its obvious his brother isn't telling the truth whatsoever.

 

[poohandwendy]

Just to throw something else (along the same lines) into the mix:

When I was reading the first book, I remember wondering how the siblings would handle reading his depiction of their lives? I say this because, if it were my brother or sister, I may feel guilty about the fact that I didn't help...or that I was depicted as not helping or standing by and allowing this to occur (without alerting authorities or helping him in other ways). I wondered if they would be mad that he really didn't paint them in a favorable light, for the most part he basically said he was on his own (and that they knew what was happenening to him, but were sometimes unsympathetic and mean...although he didn't seem to blame them...there still was an underlying feeling that they wished he woul just toe the line or something) Even though they were all children, I could see being a bit miffed by the portrayal.

Anyone else think about this?

 

[niks81]

Yeah, can you read my mind? LOL

I totally thought the same thing

 

[Cindy B]

The 6th and 7th graders are reading this in my school. Its mostly a 7th grade book either required for health/fitness or language arts.

 

[Kristi1357]

I read his books years ago and also thought they were incredible. If he can survive such torture, we all can survive pretty much anything!

I also agree that maybe some of the facts are mixed up - how could you keep anything straight when you are so phycially abused? I also agree that siblings views of things are awfully different sometimes. I know my sister and I almost always see situations differently.

Turning his life around after years of such an ordeal is just simply amazing!

 

[pjlla]

I don't have time to read everyone's comments about these books, but I read "A Child called It" a few years ago. I found it so terribly sad and depressing I didn't ready any more of his books. It just made me ill..........................P

 

[CEDmom]

Originally posted by poohandwendy
Just to throw something else (along the same lines) into the mix:

When I was reading the first book, I remember wondering how the siblings would handle reading his depiction of their lives? I say this because, if it were my brother or sister, I may feel guilty about the fact that I didn't help...or that I was depicted as not helping or standing by and allowing this to occur (without alerting authorities or helping him in other ways). I wondered if they would be mad that he really didn't paint them in a favorable light, for the most part he basically said he was on his own (and that they knew what was happenening to him, but were sometimes unsympathetic and mean...although he didn't seem to blame them...there still was an underlying feeling that they wished he woul just toe the line or something) Even though they were all children, I could see being a bit miffed by the portrayal.

Anyone else think about this?

I think what you're saying is true. I recall in his 2nd book he met with his father and he appologized for not helping him. I guess his brothers just haven't reached that point yet. Although I don't really know what a child could have done. Things were much different back then and people didn't poke their noses in other peoples business. It's because of cases like this that there are such strict regulations about how anyone working with children that suspects abuse must report it. A lot of people let David down before he finally got help.

 

[monarchsfan16]

I read this for my freshman year book report. I can't believe kids younger than that are required to read this book. I could hardly handle it, as a 15 year old. It's so amazing he even lived through it. I can't imagine having to deal with that. Its even more amazing the way that he has been able to turn his life around. I also want to know why he was singled out. Some day I'll read the remaining 2 books, but I have not been able to yet.

 

[poohandwendy]

Although I don't really know what a child could have done. Things were much different back then and people didn't poke their noses in other peoples business. It's because of cases like this that there are such strict regulations about how anyone working with children that suspects abuse must report it. A lot of people let David down before he finally got help.

ITA, andI want to clarify that I do not think his siblings should feel guilty for not rescuing him. Even though they didn't face the daily wrath of their mother, like he did, they certainly knew they could be next...children do not have the resources or the mindset that they can rescue someone else. They really were ALL living in abusive situation, even as witnesses. And you are right, things were definitely different back then.

I just didn't want anyone to get the impression that I feel the siblings were in any way responsible for how things were. But I can see them having some guilt and/or anger over the abuse and the book, in retrospect, now that they are adults. It is human nature.

 

[Harley Chick]

I was just thinking about this book the other day, mainly because we've been having a problem at work with food disappearing from the refrigerator, and I remembered that this kid used to go into the teachers lunches and take food because he was starving. Then there's another thread here about people stealing food from the refrigerator, and it got me thinking about it again this morning, and now, here's this thread. How coincidental.

 

[CEDmom]

Originally posted by poohandwendy
ITA, andI want to clarify that I do not think his siblings should feel guilty for not rescuing him. Even though they didn't face the daily wrath of their mother, like he did, they certainly knew they could be next...children do not have the resources or the mindset that they can rescue someone else. They really were ALL living in abusive situation, even as witnesses. And you are right, things were definitely different back then.

I just didn't want anyone to get the impression that I feel the siblings were in any way responsible for how things were. But I can see them having some guilt and/or anger over the abuse and the book, in retrospect, now that they are adults. It is human nature.

I didn't think that at all about what you posted. You brought up a very valid point. I think his brothers might be feeling what a lot of child that grow up in an abusive environment feel, survivor guilt.

 

[Pete's Mom]

Wow! I've never heard of this book or author. Having had a very similiar upbringing, I have mixed feelings on the subject. I can't imagine ever writing a book and promoting it as the "3rd worst child abuse case in blah blah". I find that offensive. It's not a contest. Abuse is abuse and it's all bad, so in a way, I can kind of understand how his siblings might feel especially if he was doing this strictly for financial gain. On the other hand, maybe he wrote it as a form of self therapy and he genuinely wants to help others. I don't know.

 

[MosMom]

I was abused by my violent alcoholic mother. It wasn't even close to the things that this man went through but it was pretty bad. My brother really doesn't remember much. She rarely went after him. He has always been the "golden boy". He claims to remember nothing of those times but I think he probably blocked a lot of it out. I think it is normal for a sibling to remember things differently or block it out. Perhaps the siblings feel guilty that they didn't get the brunt of it (they shouldn't but they probably do). I also wouldn't doubt that his facts about when exactly things happened get mixed up. When I remember back to my childhood, I don't really remember exactly when things happened and can't place a lot of it. I went through 5 years of abuse until I finally told my dad and he got me out. Those 5 years are a complete blur.

So, I wouldn't automatically jump and say that he is embellishing just for these purposes. I do believe that a mother could do those things to her child. My mother never made me eat anything (she wouldn't feed us though...I would often make sure my brother and I ate) but she did burn me with her cigarette on purpose once (I still have a scar on my arm) and when I cried as she brushed my hair she beat me with the hairbrush and pulled my hair so hard I had welts all over my head. She choked me violently often, held my head under water for crying when she scrubbed my head while washing it. She had nails and actually cut into my head she was scrubbing so hard. Beat me in the back with her high heel shoe for trying them on. No, I didn't have to eat the contents of a diaper and I didn't have to drink ammonia but I believe that my mom was capable of that if she was mad enough.

No teachers ever suspected anything. I was failing school and missed 38 days (my mom would never wake up to take me) the year I finally told my dad. I slipped through the cracks. Only after my dad called the school did the counselor ask me what was going on. I think part of the reason I slipped through was that we were "rich". Rich people don't abuse their kids right? People from nice communities don't do these things.

Anyhow, all this started just to let you know that I think it is possible to get the facts of when things happened mixed up. Especially, when all of the things happened as a child.

I look at my daughter, who is approaching the same age I was when it first started (abuse didn't start until after my mom divorced my dad) and I can't fathom hurting her. You truly have to be demented to do it.

I also believe that the book could have been self therapy. To let the world know what a parent did to you can be liberating. Christina Crawford did the same thing with "Mommy Dearest". I don't think that is unusual either. Everyone deals with things differently.

 

[niks81]

I can't imagine ever writing a book and promoting it as the "3rd worst child abuse case in blah blah". I find that offensive. It's not a contest. Abuse is abuse and it's all bad, so in a way, I can kind of understand how his siblings might feel especially if he was doing this strictly for financial gain. On the other hand, maybe he wrote it as a form of self therapy and he genuinely wants to help others. I don't know.

Someone correct me if I'm wrong, but I think the critics have used the '3rd worst case' comment primarily--he flat out said his message was that it's important to survive and help yourself. I think he did write it as a form of self therapy, but I also think he wrote it to help others that are struggling.

 

[niks81]

Anyhow, all this started just to let you know that I think it is possible to get the facts of when things happened mixed up. Especially, when all of the things happened as a child.

I agree