Gift amount for your children's BF or GF?

[westjones]

I have been wondering.....how much do you spend on a gift for your child's girlfriend/boyfriend for Christmas?

Last month, I bought a few things for my DD's boyfriend which all came to about $50. They had been dating a year (last year they had just started dating, and I spent about $10 for a gift for him that year, but this year I spent a bit more).

I guess I thought that seemed like a good amount, but then she goes to his dad's side of the family for Christmas and there the grandmother gave her $50 in cash, and the dad gave her a lotion/bath set along with $100 in cash! (If some of you may recall, the mother of the boy doesn't like my DD so she was not included in Christmas with that side of the family, this is the dad's side....the parents are divorced).

So what do you guys usually spend when it comes to your child's boyfriend/girlfriend?

 

[maslex]

Not sure how old these kids are but my son (will be 16 in March) has been seeing the same girl for a little over a year now.

Last Christmas they were only together about 1 month so I didn't get her anything. This past year, I bought her two body sprays from Bath & Body works. That's it.

If they were older, I'd probably spend a bit more. I think what you spent is fine.

 

[java]

Um am I supposed to get them a gift? So far nothing. DS's(18) girlfriend came and stayed with us over Christmas. I was thinking about getting her something and ds said not to. So I didn't.
I think what you did was kind and generous!

 

[westjones]

Oh, I should have said, they are 19 and in college. And I did see the boy almost every day last semester leading up to Christmas (he was at our house a lot).

 

[lovesmurfs]

My son (turning 19 Sunday) has had several long-term girlfriends. Up until this year, I never bought anything for any of them. He's been dating his current GF since early May, and she's over at the house a LOT.

Bought her a little handmade pottery tray for her dresser and a scarf -- not more than $20 total, but I was happy with the thought.

ETA: My son's GF's family gave him a CAT hoodie.

 

[yoopermom]

I do really think it's the thought that counts. DS18 has had his first really serious gf since summer, and for Xmas I bought her a fancy picture frame and had their homecoming picture put in it, along with a giftcard to their favorite restaurant. Maybe $40 total.

Terri

 

[westjones]

Thanks for sharing everyone. I was just a bit surprised at the generosity of the boy's family (and wasn't really sure of the 'protocol' for gifts to daughter's boyfriend).

 

[pat fan]

Geesh....guess my DS's GF made out pretty well! Since this was the first Christmas either of my boys has had a significant other, I asked my sister who has been there done that what the protocol was. She said same # of gifts as everyone else, but lower $$ per gift.

I think I got her one less gift than my boys, but they were all much less expensive gifts than I got my boys. Still, I spent a pretty good amount on her. The most expensive thing was a sweater at $30, the cheapest was a can opener (they had us over at Thanksgiving and there's was broken!).

BTW, they have been together almost a year and living together since Oct. I do think they moved in together too quickly and told them so, but she's a sweet girl and they seem pretty happy together.

In retrospect, I probably spent too much, but what are you gonna do? My DS loves her and I want them to know she is welcome in the family.

 

[Patience]

My oldest daughter has been seeing the same boy for about a year and a half now. I bought him a $25 gas card and a college t-shirt for Christmas. They are both 18.

 

[kim929]

BTW, they have been together almost a year and living together since Oct. I do think they moved in together too quickly and told them so, but she's a sweet girl and they seem pretty happy together.

In retrospect, I probably spent too much, but what are you gonna do? My DS loves her and I want them to know she is welcome in the family.

To me this is a different situation. They live together, so almost a dil/sil I did as your sister did. They each received XX amount of gifts, I spent a little less $ on them, but not much.

My ds has had the same gf for over a yr. He is 18 she is 17. They are still in school, I bought her a few gifts but not as many as the bf/gf who are living together I spent half what I spent on my son.

 

[Princess Dolly]

I have been wondering.....how much do you spend on a gift for your child's girlfriend/boyfriend for Christmas?

Last month, I bought a few things for my DD's boyfriend which all came to about $50. They had been dating a year (last year they had just started dating, and I spent about $10 for a gift for him that year, but this year I spent a bit more).

I guess I thought that seemed like a good amount, but then she goes to his dad's side of the family for Christmas and there the grandmother gave her $50 in cash, and the dad gave her a lotion/bath set along with $100 in cash! (If some of you may recall, the mother of the boy doesn't like my DD so she was not included in Christmas with that side of the family, this is the dad's side....the parents are divorced).

So what do you guys usually spend when it comes to your child's boyfriend/girlfriend?

The Rule.

I don't think there is one hard and fast answer, each family has different means and some families place more emphasis on gifts.

 

[Fire14]

When I was dating and what my Brothers Girlfriends got.
A pj set, Lotion/shower gel combo from B+BW, A nice pr of earrings( prob 20.00 ish), a sweatshirt from Jcpenny ( 15-2o ish). One year I got a couple gift of popcorn tin from BF grand parents ( not living together). I personally didn't expect anything and was happy with what I got.
Even now my dad usually gets us either a couple gift of 25-50.00 gc or seperate gifts, this last Xmas I got check for 30.00 ( car issues up wazoo) dh got 2 pr lounge pants ( neither of us cares but I swear one pr were recycled gift, others from walmart).

 

[moorhunhe]

I've been together with my current boyfriend now for almost 3 years (in May).
And he's been with us for 2 Christmasses (should have been 3, but we were seperated for 3 months back in 2010 over Christmas).

Anyways, my mom likes to be fair to all the children, and got all 5 of us (me, brother, sister, sister-in-law, my boyfriend) a number of gifts that would add up so that every child had gotten something for the same amount.
(my parents decided to spend 100 € for each child, and if they couldn't find enough gifts, they gave us an envelope with the rest of it in cash).

Way too generous if you ask me, haha, I'm very gratefull, but I really don't need 100 € worth in presents.
I told them that last year, but if it's what they want ...

 

[PigletsPal2]

DGD's BF is really more than a BF, but not quite a fiance. They've been together for more than a year, she's 21 and he's 23.

We gave them a joint gift of a new TV (theirs died), gave her $100 IKEA gift card (her request) and him a $100 gift card toward a pair of Doc Martens he had been saving for. His family was equally generous to DGD.

Queen Colleen

 

[Disney Doll]

I'd say what you did was fine OP. Generous, but not too over the top...

 

[zurgswife]

My dd and her BF have been together 3 yrs and currently live together. Money was tight so I gave about $175 for a combined gift for the two of them - between stuff for the apt (dishes etc) and a sweater for each of them.

 

[abdmom]

I was married to dh for 13 years. Dated for 9 years prior to that. I don't EVERY recall getting a present from his parents. My parents gave him something small each year.

 

[Art 1]

A couple of hundred.

 

[poohfriend77]

Don't make yourself crazy comparing your gifts to the ones your son got. It sounds like your gifts were generous and thoughtful!

This thread reminds me of my grandma. By the time I was in college, she would just give each of us grandkids $100 for Christmas. First Christmas. By the 2nd or 3rd Christmas my boyfriend (now husband) was around, she gave him $25. She LOVED him and was really pushing for us to get engaged, even though I was still in college. The next year, she told him that as soon as he proposed, he would be "family," and he'd get the full $100 too. I think she really thought that would be the push he needed.

He did propose a year after that, the day before we were going to visit Grandma to celebrate Christmas. I teased him that he only did it because he didn't want to face her again if we weren't engaged. She looked at the ring, looked at him, and said, "Well, I guess I owe you another $75."

 

[horseshowmom]

Thanks for sharing everyone. I was just a bit surprised at the generosity of the boy's family (and wasn't really sure of the 'protocol' for gifts to daughter's boyfriend).

I think you did fine. Honestly, I think the other side was over the top. Maybe they were trying to compensate for how the mother has behaved.