Do you trust your child's teacher, school, etc?

[LisaR]

This is inspired from the current thread about the little girl that is getting threatening notes at school. In addition, I have read the same thing in other threads on this board.

Do you fully trust your child's teacher, principal, school, and the adults that are in the school to "do the right thing" when it comes to your child? I noticed a few people in recent threads that have made comments about not trusting the school to handle things properly. References were made that some don't seem to trust the system. If you are one of those that doesn't trust your child's school, I am curious why you send your child there in the first place. I can't imagine sending my kids away for 7 hours a day with people I don't trust.

Lisa

 

[laurie31]

Do I trust them to educate my child and provide her with a safe environment to the best of their abilities? Yes.

Do I trust them to put my child's interests first and foremost and make sure her needs are met? Not really. Nor would I expect them too...but *I* sure as heck can, and that's why I volunteer at the school. They know me and I know them. Most of them I can trust and if I had a problem I believe I could go to them ("them" being the principal, the teacher, whomever was appropriate) and it would be handled.

Would I trust that they would handle something major (like the scary notes) without me being in their face about it? Nope. They have 600+ kids to worry about. I have two. btw, I haven't ever had the reason to need to be "in their face" about anything (so far ) but no I wouldn't trust them to do the right thing by my child, as they have to worry about doing the "right thing" for themselves. They are going to cover thier rears, follow procedures which may or may not be in my child's best interests, and who knows what else, in that type situation. I hope I never have to find out how my school would handle it, but no I would not trust them to handle it properly. This doesn't mean they aren't trustworthy to teach my child. I am very impressed with the discipline and order in the school. The principal and vice-principal oversee the bus loading, and then the car line. A police officer directs traffic. We don't have the kinds of car line problems I read about on here.

We did at the private school I moved them out of - which is one of the reasons we moved. I was afraid a child would be hit by a car - and NO ONE cared! I complained so many times and they said they didn't have the staff to direct traffic or enforce the drop-off rules. (funny, they did when we enrolled and the director was always out there too. Then she resigned. The new director just didn't want to get her rear out of her warm office and do it) I also was not impressed with their security. The school the girls attend now makes EVRERYONE sign in at the office and leave their car keys! You *could not* sneak off with a child. They have your keys! Our previous school had locked doors, but if you buzzed to get it, they would open the door remotely and not check to see who you were. DH wandered in and picked up DD once without anyone asking him for any ID. They did not know him - I usually picked her up. It really upset us. Again, they didn't care. They said they figured DD knew who she was supposed to go with. Um...she was 4! What if DH and I were divorced and he shouldn't have her? It's not that uncommon a situation these days. So I agree, if you don't trust the school with your child you should remove your child. We did!

Laurie (sorry for the tangent!)

 

[Cindyluwho]

Do I trust them to educate my child and provide her with a safe environment to the best of their abilities? Yes.

Do I trust them to put my child's interests first and foremost and make sure her needs are met? Not really. Nor would I expect them too...but *I* sure as heck can, and that's why I volunteer at the school. They know me and I know them. Most of them I can trust and if I had a problem I believe I could go to them ("them" being the principal, the teacher, whomever was appropriate) and it would be handled.

ITA
Two very good books to read are "The Gift of Fear" & "Protecting the Gift" by Gavin DeBecker

And I would like to add that I never trust anyone blindly. I'm not going to let my child be alone with a stranger, even a teacher, unless I've gotten to know them personally. I trust my instinct and intuition. I've seen and lived firsthand what can happen to a child when the "authority figures" aren't monitered closely enough.

 

[mudnuri]

I trust DD9's teacher with DD's life

DD8's teacher I dont know well enough yet

Principal is new this year- not sure yet

superintendent I trust with MY life....

the rest of the school I trust to protect my kids, but the majority of them I had as i went to the same school...

Brandy

 

[summerrluvv]

This is inspired from the current thread about the little girl that is getting threatening notes at school. In addition, I have read the same thing in other threads on this board.

Do you fully trust your child's teacher, principal, school, and the adults that are in the school to "do the right thing" when it comes to your child? I noticed a few people in recent threads that have made comments about not trusting the school to handle things properly. References were made that some don't seem to trust the system. If you are one of those that doesn't trust your child's school, I am curious why you send your child there in the first place. I can't imagine sending my kids away for 7 hours a day with people I don't trust.

Lisa

Are you a homeschooler?

 

[Wishing on a star]

Do I trust them to educate my child and provide her with a safe environment to the best of their abilities? Yes.


Would I trust that they would handle something major (like the scary notes) without me being in their face about it? Nope. They have 600+ kids to worry about. I have two. btw, I haven't ever had the reason to need to be "in their face" about anything (so far ) but no I wouldn't trust them to do the right thing by my child, as they have to worry about doing the "right thing" for themselves. They are going to cover thier rears, follow procedures which may or may not be in my child's best interests, and who knows what else, in that type situation. I hope I never have to find out how my school would handle it, but no I would not trust them to handle it properly.

My words exactly!

They are an 'institution'
They are a school with several hundred kids to herd around like cattle.

They are not law enforcement detectives, experienced child psychologist, medical doctors, etc.. etc..

They simply do not have the ability or capacity to protect children in extenuating circumstances!

Too many times have I personally experienced administrators and educators only be interested in covering their own behinds... Way to many times!

Do I trust them... NO.

 

[RitaZ.]

The fact is that there is no school where a child is 100% safe. There are simply too many variables that can't be controlled. I like my children's schools, I think they have good teachers and most of them and the staff really have good intentions. Realistically, that can't be said of every person though. I have seen administrators and teachers do things to cover their posteriors and hide facts that may depict them in a negative light. Also, I have seen them make decisions that were NOT in the best interest of the child/student.

I have 3 kids in public school and I have learned how the system works. I tend to choose my battles when it comes to school problems, some can be ignored and others simply can't. I trust my gut and intuition, I'm rarely wrong when I listen to them. We have had some minor issues with the schools over the years and I have always been the first one to pursue a solution to those problems. Most teachers that I have come across are quick to respond when a problem arises. The ones that don't are in the minority, but they are the ones that give the good teachers a bad name. I find that the administration sets the tone for the rest of the staff.

So, when a problem comes up at school, give the teachers and administration an opportunity to rectify the problem. If they aren't responsive, you'll know this right away, then proceed to the next level.

 

[minkydog]

Yes, I do. I have two kids in school now, but I homeschooled for 12 years. We had some trouble with the high school teachers. But the middle school has been right on their game every step of the way. DS10 is in a severe special needs class and the relationships within the classroom are very close. I am quite satisfied that these teachers would give their life for my son if they had to.

I never thought of the public schools as the "evil empire" or felt that i had to protect my children from the supposed dangers they might face when leaving my side to go to school. We homeschooled to give our kids a different and better education, and when it was no longer possible to do that we put them in public school. And when that failed, we brought one of them back home and graduated him there.

 

[Stitchfans]

To educate yes. To be fair and keep her totally safe, no. Even though they claim to have zero tolerance for bullys that is so wrong.

 

[LisaR]

Are you a homeschooler?

Yes, and it was originally done because I did not trust the school to protect my son. My son is anaphylactic to tree nuts, peanuts and strawberries and he is allergic to dairy and eggs. In preschool, I supplied his own snack but parent helpers and the teacher were always trying to give him "just a little taste." The final straw was the day I walked in to see a mom trying to give him a Peanut Butter Cup. Her response and I quote, "peanut is made up of 99% sugar. There are hardly in peanuts in here. I am sure he would be just fine." The teacher was standing about 3 ft. away. It was at that point that I decided the school system will not be able to protect my son. In all honesty, I don't expect them to because his situation is unique. I don't feel I am "entitled" to them making special accommodations for him. Add to that the fact that the state we were living in at the time had a policy that Epipens could not be carried by the child. They had to be under lock and key in the nurse's office. Anyone that has had a child go into anaphylactic shock knows that you have minutes at best to inject your child. Having it locked up in the nurses office isn't acceptable.

My point being, I didn't feel my child was safe in the school and did something about it. I should add that we ended up loving homeschooling. My daughter who doesn't have any issues and I felt was perfectly safe in the schools is also homeschooled now.

Lisa

 

[summerrluvv]

Yes, and it was originally done because I did not trust the school to protect my son. My son is anaphylactic to tree nuts, peanuts and strawberries and he is allergic to dairy and eggs. In preschool, I supplied his own snack but parent helpers and the teacher were always trying to give him "just a little taste." The final straw was the day I walked in to see a mom trying to give him a Peanut Butter Cup. Her response and I quote, "peanut is made up of 99% sugar. There are hardly in peanuts in here. I am sure he would be just fine." The teacher was standing about 3 ft. away. It was at that point that I decided the school system will not be able to protect my son. In all honesty, I don't expect them to because his situation is unique. I don't feel I am "entitled" to them making special accommodations for him. Add to that the fact that the state we were living in at the time had a policy that Epipens could not be carried by the child. They had to be under lock and key in the nurse's office. Anyone that has had a child go into anaphylactic shock knows that you have minutes at best to inject your child. Having it locked up in the nurses office isn't acceptable.

My point being, I didn't feel my child was safe in the school and did something about it. I should add that we ended up loving homeschooling. My daughter who doesn't have any issues and I felt was perfectly safe in the schools is also homeschooled now.

Lisa

In a situation like that I would think about homeschooling as well.

I trust my son's school to educate and supervise him while he is under their care. I have not had any incidents with my district (nor have I heard about any) thus far that would make me untrusting of them to handle various situations. Now, if my child were receiving death threats from another student in the building and the school acted in the manner that the other poster's school is, that would be a different story.

 

[Disney Doll]

I believe that schools are institutions (and I don't mean that in the negative connotation of the word "institution"), and like most institutions will protect their interests first. Now, protecting their interests means protecting the students to the best of their ability, and I believe most schools try, but "the best of their ability" depends on a lot of variables...available finances, staffing, staff's abilities, school location, type of student body to name a few.

 

[Planogirl]

Schools may protect their interests first but I believe that their interests are served by protecting the kids that they teach. Letting bad things happen to those kids certainly won't help the schools!

Also, I believe that most teachers and school adminstrators care about the kids or else they wouldn't be there. Would I place 100% of my trust in the schools? No, but I would give them a chance to work things out and I would work WITH them, not against them.

 

[Marseeya]

I agree with everything Laurie said!

In general, I trust the elementary school a good bit and have not had any problems with them. I've spent a lot of time there volunteering in the classrooms and I truly believe that they put the kids first.

The middle school, I don't trust at all, and I took my son out of that environment and homeschooled him when things got too bad. Hopefully things will be different by the time my youngest gets there, because the main source of the problem (the principal) is no longer there. I won't have the same luxury to homeschool her, but I would make it happen if I had to.

The high school, I'm finding out, is pretty good.

 

[disney junky]

My words exactly!

They are an 'institution'
They are a school with several hundred kids to herd around like cattle.

They are not law enforcement detectives, experienced child psychologist, medical doctors, etc.. etc..

They simply do not have the ability or capacity to protect children in extenuating circumstances!

Too many times have I personally experienced administrators and educators only be interested in covering their own behinds... Way to many times!

Do I trust them... NO.

What a lousy attitude. We do not herd children around like cattle. We address students as individual human beings. Your vitriol toward educators permeates your every post about education and you never miss an opportunity to post. I feel sorry for you.

 

[Toby'sFriend]

I trust my child's teacher and school to do what is best for the Class or the School as a whole. It isn't their job to be solely concerned with my child, that is my job.

In that case, it isn't so much that I wouldn't trust the teacher or principal it is that I would know

#1, they can not spend their whole entire day, the entire school week and school year making sure MY child is safe. Their job is to look after every kid in that building, not to play bodyguard to my kid. The very nature of their job means that sometimes, their attention has to be diverted from my child to another child.

and

#2 They are educators - not law enforcement personnel. I don't go to the Captain of the Police Department when my kid needs to learn how to read - that is the job of the Teacher. Conversely, if my child is receiving death threats, it is not the job of a Teacher to solve the crime.

 

[lovingthemouse]

As a teacher, I know that many parents trust their children to me - in fact, over my 29 years in education, I have had many kids spend more time with me during the day than with their parents. I love what I am doing, it is not always easy, can be quite challenging some days; but as I trusted my five children to their teachers, I value my students as well.
As to the schools - times have changed! I teach in a large urban school system; the city has changed, the population has changed, the value of being educated has changed but the majority of teachers I know are still dedicated educators even in the face of all these changes.
I observe my administrators skillfully handle many students on a daily basis with great professionalism. And yes, my kids were public school educated!!

 

[Mskanga]

Do I trust them ? Yes, I don't have a reason to not to. I don't know what is going to happen next year but for right now this is how I feel.

 

[PaulaSue]

Too many times have I personally experienced administrators and educators only be interested in covering their own behinds... Way to many times!

Do I trust them... NO.[/QUOTE]


Following this thought.....After being on PTO for over a year I am learning a lot and I am starting to wonder.

 

[lisajl]

No! We have had two bad teachers, I mean terrible teachers.
My son's 4th grade teacher was harrassing him. I had a mom come and tell me her DD was upset at how the teacher was harrassing my son.
Had a long talk with the principal, she did nothing. We wrote a letter to the superintendent, nothing.
I have one more child to go through this school and I will be damned if he gets the same teacher.

Lisa